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[Losingtheplot]

Fortunately, I've never had those symptoms ........ I had restless legs since the age of 11 - could that be the side effect?  I cured mine by eating several bananas a day or taking 'nurofen' at night.

On the leaflet with the Ads it lists involuntary movements as one of the side effects. Your very lucky if you don't get this side effect and I am sure they may be something to counter act it

[CLKD]

I wonder which ADs.    So far having taken at least 7 successfully I've not been affected.  PHEW!

[Losingtheplot]

Fluoxetine although all SSRI's can cause this. Its more violent jerky movements.   They haven't surfaced as yet and hopefully they don't but they usually appear after I have been on the Ad's for a while.
It will be hubby that will complain first but I will have to explain its either he gets a good nights sleep and my mental health detoriates.
I do suffer nausea but that settles down over time.  Either way I need the Ads to have a quality of life as I can't keep going thru this pattern it is exhausting and draining for both me and my family.  The worse thing about mental illness is that it is hidden, so if you don't look physically broken people think you are ok.

I remember in my early 20s feeling really low and a colleague at work was also feeling very low and was about 15 years older than me.  I tried to explain that I also suffered from mental health and her reply was " Don't be silly you have a gorgeous figure and you are beautiful what on earth do you have to be depressed about"  .  I felt like screaming my mind is broken! That's what I have to be depressed about, it doesn't work properly, I don't work properly and I don't know why!.

I really wish at times I wasn't born to be living a life like this is no kind of life.  The fact is I was born, and failings from my parents have caused all these issues for me, alongside some issues at school which all changed me as a person and have affected me ever since.

I do hope I get the right type of counselling this time to sort all these issues out  (alongside my Ads) which I know will be difficult as I have a tendency to say I am ok even when I am not. I also know waiting lists for treatment will be very long and if I could afford private I would.  At least the ball is rolling again I guess, I have my assessement on Wed and then will find out which counselling therapy I will be out forward for.

[CLKD]

So make a note to hand to your Therapist: "I am reluctant and find it difficult to let it all out".  That way appropriate probing questions can be asked.  These therapists aren't there to judge us.  I was relieved to B able to speak at someone without being questioned. 

Half a day at a time!

[Dierdre]

I've got my last session of Talking Therapy CBT tomorrow for anxiety and it has helped a lot but not a cure completely. I still get anxiety but having it confirmed why by a professional (traumatic childhood), has enabled me to come to terms with it better, there is a reason why I'm like this and it's ok.  I'm managing now which is all that's needed really, everyone suffers with anxiety it's just some cope better than others and some can't cope at all. It's finding the way to cope best for you, therapy, meds or a bit of both.
Hope the talking therapy helps.

[Losingtheplot]

Thank you for sharing your experience.  I just want better coping methods that's all and it seems I am one of those people that can't cope!  I do need the Ads as I know therapy alone will not be enough due to how I am feeling now and how low I have dipped when not been on them.
 I am pleased the therapy has helped you xxxx

[CLKD]

Losingtheplot - is there a specific incident that you are unable to cope with, mayB make a note so that you have that to open the session with.  Initially I rambled  until the therapist gently directed me, asking what I needed to sort first.

[Losingtheplot]

Not a particular one I can think of as it all tends to intermingle.  I am sure the therapist will unfold things

[Losingtheplot]

I just want to thank all the ladies that have replied to my post. I know everyone has their own struggles too so  really am grateful

Xxxxxxxx

[Nas]

I just want to thank all the ladies that have replied to my post. I know everyone has their own struggles too so  really am grateful

Xxxxxxxx

That is why this forum is invaluable. It offers that safe space for us to vent/chat/air worries and fears, in a non judgemental manner.

Lets hope a new approach in therapy can work for you. No one should have to resign themselves to the fact that they are going to feel rubbish indefinitely.

This time of year though, is often so tough for many and it takes courage, to grin and bear it, when you feel like doing the opposite!

xxx

[Losingtheplot]

Thank you Nas.
You are so right this time of year is so very difficult for me and many others like you say.
Once my meds start kicking in and I am able to think clearer I will continue with them as I know I need them for life otherwise I relapse.
Not a failure but what is needed and thank you Sarah T for making me realise that again.
Just when I get low I overthink and makes me feel that I should be able to cope, everyone else seems to!
Is it just other people also suffer but like me hide it and grin and bear.
Hope your doing ok Nas I have seen your posts and can see you have been thru a very tough time latelyxxxx

[Nas]

Losingtheplot, Sarah T makes some very valid points; it is absolutely okay, not to be okay.

As you say, once the meds kick in, you will be on an even keel hopefully and then you can plan how you want to proceed therapy wise.

Never think you should be able to cope, or indeed have to cope. Just because people appear to be coping, doesn’t mean they are. People are great at putting on an act.

Keep us posted on how you are x

[Losingtheplot]

Thsnk you Nas xxx

[SarahT]

You're not wrong there Nas,

We all have to get through days where we plaster on that fake smile whilst inside we feel wrecked. But seeking help is a strength, a positive thing to do for ourselves. And it doesn't go overnight, it's ongoing maintenance for some of us.
Losingtheplot,  feeling so unstable is seriously hard, but you know once the ADs take hold and hopefully some therapy and it slowly slowly begins to help. I like CLKD's advice, write down the thought that you hold back, gives them something to work with.

And as always,be kind to yourself, no one chooses to feel like this,it's not a fault. Xx

[Losingtheplot]

Hey Sarah

Thanks again. Its a telephone assessment so I will have to tell them that I hold back, this I don't do intentionally but it happens as my mind is confused and trying to find the words to engage. Its like I get a form of dementia.

Xxxx