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Author Topic: Why can't people leave me alone?  (Read 4292 times)

Penguin99

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Why can't people leave me alone?
« on: July 25, 2021, 09:49:54 PM »

Do you ever feel constantly harassed? I know im being miserable but I just feel like people don't give me a minute. I really don't need to be around people all the time and I'm more than happy with my own company. I have a friend who calls quite often, sometimes I don't answer. I find it a chore not a joy. I'm in touch with my other friends every 3-4 weeks and its great. I told her I'm having to isolate this week and now I wish I hadn't. She said ooh I can ring you all week! I gave a swift no and said i won't answer. She was shocked but said she'd keep ringing again I said I won't answer. She said you can't be like that with your friends. I feel bad but tbh all I want is to be left alone. I know I dont sound a good friend, but does anyone else feel the same or is it just me?
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CLKD

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #1 on: July 26, 2021, 06:43:46 AM »

When I was about 13 I went on holiday with my parents for 3 weeks.  When I came back, the girl next door who I had been friends with ........... for years. .......... suddenly I felt that I had outgrown her.  If that makes sense  :-\.  I don't think that I ignored her or anything but she irritated me.

"I'm having to cut back on all 'phone calls and visits due to anxiety levels rising".  Now I was never brave enough to say it but often needed to!  But something on those lines might be the way to go, especially if you telephone her.  That way you won't feel as trapped.

I have a 'friend' in the village who I never visit nor speak on the 'phone.  She's full of news that quite honestly, I'm not interested in  ::).  Years ago I was trapped in her kitchen, we'd had coffee and a nice chat - then as I went to leave it was "Oh I must tell you this" 4 about another 30 mins..  Even to the point of leaning on my open car window, still 'at it'!

It's OK to withdraw.  Do U have an answer machine or caller recognition on your 'phone?
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Penguin99

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #2 on: July 26, 2021, 11:40:38 AM »

I do feel bad but honestly I have so much going on in my life atm that I just want to be left alone. Half the time when we're on the phone she's talking to her husband, so why bother calling me? I do see her name and don't answer. But when I said to her, she said " but we don't talk often" >:( she doesn't see it. I dont have this problem with anyone else. I know people are probably thinking, who wants a friend like me? But I'm quite a personal person and like my own company. I won't ever get a day on my own now that hubby has retired,sometimes I say to him, I love you but you are annoying me :D I just feel like I want to scream sometimes.
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CLKD

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #3 on: July 27, 2021, 12:02:06 PM »

"Sorry, not now I'm really tired with busyness in my family. I will call you when I feel better"

It's hard shrugging off a persistent 'friend'!!   However, if I'm watching something on 📺, eating a meal or out my attitude is "I might not be here anyway!"

You can arrange a day apart ........ are there hobbies to keep you both occupied?  Or mayB 1 day out together a month?  Batch cook so that you aren't in the kitchen feeling like you are slaving away ;-)

He may think the same .........
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Ju

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #4 on: August 31, 2021, 07:55:24 PM »

Understand completely.....I used to like seeing friends and being social but not anymore....I have had to distance myself from some. Please don't feel bad, you need to do what's right for you, you need to look after your own well being. If your friend doesn't get it after you told her, you just have to start ignoring.... I had to do this with someone who kept on with me, in the end I did snap at her as she wasn't taking on board my needs... And she's 10 years older then me too, so has gone through it. I told her I need to look after my own health and I do work part time too....I really can't be doing with others at the moment... We have our work, our own family and our health that needs looking after...don't be afraid to snap at her if needs be and distance yourself, if she's not listening to you. All the best.... :foryou: :love: :love:
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jillydoll

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #5 on: August 31, 2021, 08:19:57 PM »

I can’t be arsed with people either.
I’m happy to be in on my own when my family are out at work.
Doing what I want to, when I want to. No one else to consider.
I’ve had enough of that over the years. 🤷🏼‍♀️

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Lesley

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #6 on: September 01, 2021, 08:17:28 PM »

I hear you! I’m fed up doing things to keep other people happy when all I want to do is sit on the couch and watch the telly in peace! Maybe it’s time we all started looking after ourselves and stopped agonising over what other people think - real friends should understand anyway!
😘
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Jo4545

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #7 on: September 01, 2021, 10:08:03 PM »

Me too.. Other than my partner and my youngest son who just about still  lives at home I really want to be on my own. I don't have to go to work (redundant) so don't have to interact with anyone there.

Sorry forgot the cat.. She's ok too
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CLKD

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #8 on: September 02, 2021, 06:37:15 AM »

 :catscratch: :cat88: :cat48:
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Wannabewell

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #9 on: September 03, 2021, 08:46:04 PM »

Yes, I have had issues with this kind of thing, at times it became demanding and rather like being stalked.

Needless to say some people are now not in my life and it is much better.
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Penguin99

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Re: Why can't people leave me alone?
« Reply #10 on: September 06, 2021, 12:01:48 AM »

Thanks all, I feel a little better knowing its not just me. I haven't spoken to her since, I know I should but she will just be full of questions and I really can't be doing with it. My mental health hasn't been the greatest recently and at times , I feel like I'm struggling with some personal issues that I just can't get out of my head. I have spoken with hubby and he is really good, he does sometimes get a teeny bit annoyed with me but tries his best :love:
Sometimes I feel like I just want to curl up in a corner :'(
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