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[donetoomuchmuchtooyoung]

Hi everyone! ..i was on the forum a few years back but havnt been around for a long while .
I was told i was peri at aged 42 ..it was a bit of a shock at the time tbh and lots of ranty posts on here ensued !I was hoping to enjoy my 4os but alas !
So i am now 47 and periods gradually got further apart as the years have ticked by(8 months being the longest)
However last year in the spring i had a normal cycle for 3 months.swinging back to 8 .I am in my 8th month now without a period ..frankly this is HORRIBLE.
I kind of feel like i am dying? ..or simply fading away ..like i am a shadow of myself or something ...i have some other health issues that are giving me grief also ,so it really is quite friggin miserable.
I have felt like im going to come on for about 5 months now .
Im interested to know from women here tho ,is it normal to NOT have hot flushes ?
I really dont have them at all ..or if i do they are very mild feelings of warmth .
I also am having sleep issues ,but not of the insomnia kind like most women seem to have with meno ? ..i have the total opposite issue..having been an insomniac my whole life i find i am now sleeping between 7 and 9 hours a night solidly like a log & if i allowed myself i could probably sleep in the day as well !..the fatigue and weakness not to mention a whole host of other HORRIBLE stuff is really taking over my life (i dont have one anymore)..i just dont know whats going on ..:-/ i was always quite active despite my conditions yet now even a walk to the shop feels like hell on earth to me.
I have basically no life left anymore ,cant think straight..have strange absences..and forget how to do things i fime well know how to do ! ..i have very little interest in life or humanity anymore yet am obsessed with the constant thought of dying and feeling like im dying and that my life is essentially over ....is this really it ?i mean how the hell we sposed to cope with this girls?!!
I cant be bothered to go back to the doc just to be told theres "nothing physically wrong" (YAWN) and its all down to my other health stuff 
My last tests only seemed to show i was at the beggining of peri ..i mean huh i thought was 6 years ago ??
Anyway my sincere condolences to all of you here ..!
Is this bizzare or what ...

[Katejo]

Hi everyone! ..i was on the forum a few years back but havnt been around for a long while .
I was told i was peri at aged 42 ..it was a bit of a shock at the time tbh and lots of ranty posts on here ensued !I was hoping to enjoy my 4os but alas !
So i am now 47 and periods gradually got further apart as the years have ticked by(8 months being the longest)
However last year in the spring i had a normal cycle for 3 months.swinging back to 8 .I am in my 8th month now without a period ..frankly this is HORRIBLE.
I kind of feel like i am dying? ..or simply fading away ..like i am a shadow of myself or something ...i have some other health issues that are giving me grief also ,so it really is quite friggin miserable.
I have felt like im going to come on for about 5 months now .
Im interested to know from women here tho ,is it normal to NOT have hot flushes ?
I really dont have them at all ..or if i do they are very mild feelings of warmth .
I also am having sleep issues ,but not of the insomnia kind like most women seem to have with meno ? ..i have the total opposite issue..having been an insomniac my whole life i find i am now sleeping between 7 and 9 hours a night solidly like a log & if i allowed myself i could probably sleep in the day as well !..the fatigue and weakness not to mention a whole host of other HORRIBLE stuff is really taking over my life (i dont have one anymore)..i just dont know whats going on ..:-/ i was always quite active despite my conditions yet now even a walk to the shop feels like hell on earth to me.
I have basically no life left anymore ,cant think straight..have strange absences..and forget how to do things i fime well know how to do ! ..i have very little interest in life or humanity anymore yet am obsessed with the constant thought of dying and feeling like im dying and that my life is essentially over ....is this really it ?i mean how the hell we sposed to cope with this girls?!!
I cant be bothered to go back to the doc just to be told theres "nothing physically wrong" (YAWN) and its all down to my other health stuff 
My last tests only seemed to show i was at the beggining of peri ..i mean huh i thought was 6 years ago ??
Anyway my sincere condolences to all of you here ..!
Is this bizzare or what ...

My hot flushes were very mild, certainly not enough to cause any real problems. Sorry that you are suffering now. I never had tests to check whether I was in peri or not. Just went by the reduced frequency /length of periods.

[donetoomuchmuchtooyoung]

Thanks katejo.
I definitely know its peri as even without the blood tests ive been all over the place for years .
Its getting worse now ,including all the other conditions ..I feel like any life i still had left has slowly been ebbing away basically,& over this last year in particular has been brutal ..hard and sad for my family to see me deteriorate so much.The guilt over no longer being my more bubbly self for them anymore is alot to deal with ..im sure many people here feel the same.
I guess i should atleast be grateful im not suffering with megga hot flushes !
Thankyou for your reply .

[Jeepers]

Hi

So sorry to hear you are feeling so low.. I think many of us can identify with most, if not all you have written.

I never really got any hot flushes, just felt hot sometimes at night. But , in the last coup,did years (post meno), Ihave felt like I am dying, lots of health problems, despite eating well, exercising etc.

I don't have any answers I'm afraid, just wanted to let you know you are not alone. This forum is a life saver.

Take care

Jeepers xx

[jaynej]

Hi there,

Fed up - I totally get it and I also completely understand what you mean when you say you think about dying.  Everyone thinks about dying and when you are unwell those thoughts can be really overwhelming.  I am struggling with them too.

Funnily enough I am a psychologist/counsellor (among other things that I try and do to make my life feel worthwhile), and know all the tricks to 'uplift' the mood.... but doom still comes in those quiet times.  What gets me through is knowing that it is hormonal and that it's going to get better... I don't know when but it will.

What I think about is my age... I have spent 45 years being OK before I started this hormonal horror show and feeling like shit.  45 years is a long time... and a few years of hormone imbalance compared to those years and the years after it all finishes is tiny.  I have got over feeling shit before so know there is light at the end of the tunnel... even though I know that before I get to the light, I am going to be hit by a train - but I will survive that too. 

If it helps, turn your sadness into anger.  Get a baseball bat and whack a pillow.  Changing your mood by doing something physical will increase your serotonin levels and improve your mood.  It sounds weird but the best thing really is to go out and do stuff, even if you just want to sit at home in a cupboard.  Distract yourself and then laugh at the hormonal part of you that you have beaten that day.  Take each hour as it comes and celebrate getting through that hour, then that day, then that week. 

You've got this... you just have to tell your body that it's not going to control you.  Easier said than done I know, but taking that action is the first step.

Good luck!  xx

[Baby]

What really pees me off is I would love to have a good cry but I hardly have any tears because of my dry bloody eyes