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[E]

Hi, I am not one to share my feelings very much. I normally keep a lot to myself. But I am now totally struggling. From being a chilled, motivated, outgoing individual to now dealing with:- memory lapse, concentration levels up and down, dealing with severe hot flushes more than 20 times a day, more so at night, lack of sleep, depression, mat lose my job as constantly off sick to many more issues to mention. I just feel so low, like my life is one massive struggle. Just wanting to be left alone. I feel totally down constantly, angry at the slightest little thing, constantly crying and just now at my lowest ebb. Went to my doctor who handed me 5 sheets of paper to take home and read and to return with a decision. I felt as if I really needed to speak more with him but just felt deflated. Booked another appointment with a different doctor and couldnt believe I was handed the same sheets. The information was just telling me about womens groups I could attend which were during the day. Obviously working full time there would be no way I could attend. Plus not very good opening up about personal matters. My friend gave me this website and wow looking at different options now, and for the first time felt with the forum I could openly express how the menopause is affecting me. I dont feel HRT is how I want to go. Any advice on herbal remedies, please. I just want my old life back, to feel better within myself as I dont think I can deal with this very well atm. Much love to you all x

[marge]

Sorry you're feeling so low.  This site is invaluable for information and support.  Have a good read and you'll soon find you're far from alone and someone will have experienced similar things to you. 

[AgathaC]

Hello. You poor thing. Could you share some info about age, periods, family, etc? I wonder if that might give the ladies a fuller picture to comment or advise on.
I'm tackling this period of our lives without HRT and I'm finding that it's all the sensible taking care of oneself things that make some difference. Weight, sleep, exercise, diet, supplements, distraction, not feeling alone (this forum helps the last one no end). Hope to hear more from you xx

[Ladybt28]

Hi E and welcome to the forum,
Just let it all out,  post away, say what you like because you are in very good company here. 
All of us have at one time or another (or even all the time  ) have felt or feel the way you do and there is no shame in it of any kind.  I don't know what I would have done without the forum and I like to would have been a very private person until I got into this phase of my life and now, well...I tell the ladies on here everything about anything and it's the best thing I have ever done, because you are with like minded people who have experienced all sorts.

You will never be alone or feel abandoned or judged, someone will always be along to say something whether it is practical or just a comforting word.  Tell us all about it whatever it is. x

[jillydoll]

Hi E.
Can't add much else to this, the other ladies have said it all really.
Post, and ask anything you like, ANYTHING, no judging here, we're here to help if we can.
Your not alone, meno is a terrible time for a lot of women, and we've all found this forum a god send. Keep posting. 

Jd xx

[E]

Hello. You poor thing. Could you share some info about age, periods, family, etc? I wonder if that might give the ladies a fuller picture to comment or advise on.
I'm tackling this period of our lives without HRT and I'm finding that it's all the sensible taking care of oneself things that make some difference. Weight, sleep, exercise, diet, supplements, distraction, not feeling alone (this forum helps the last one no end). Hope to hear more from you xx

I will turn 50 at New Year, still getting periods. Not every month, can be erratic, but are lasting for 2 weeks when I do. When I do I feel more drained and lethargic than ever. Thank you to you all with your replies, as I am honestly finding it very hard to cope with and feeling very low with how this has changed the person I used to be xox

[Hurdity]

Hi E

 

Sorry to hear you are experiencing the rough end of menopause - or should I say beginning? You haven't said whereabouts you are based but I find it shocking that the docs at your surgery have only suggested that you attend women's group FFS!

If your cycle length has started changing eg sometimes 3 weeks sometimes 5 etc and you are experiencing symptoms such as flushes and sweats as an absolute minimum, and over 45 - then you are deemed peri-menopausal and as such the NICE Guidelines are that you should be offered HRT as the first line of treatment.

You said you did not want to go down the HRT route so perhaps if you said this to your docs, this might explain their suggestion of women's groups? However even if you did say you didn't want to take HRT they should still recommend it to you, and also I hope they gave you advice on diet and lifestyle which is so important at this stage - ie that we maintain BMI in range - not too much fat, eat good healthy diet with lots of fresh ingredients, cutting down on sugar, refined carbs, sweet drinks, processed foods, alcohol, smoking and taking lots of exercise!!!

The fact that you are experiencing so many flushes so early in peri-menopause (if you are still getting quite a few periods) means they could go on for some time and I would urge you to re-think your feelings about HRT because, once you've found the right product at the right dose, you can say goodbye to those flushes and sweats. No wonder you can't cope. For the sake of your quality of life and mental well-being it is really worth considering and especially as you are so young, if there are no medical reasons why you shouldn't take it.

Have a read of the main website - all the sections on menopause, risks and benefits, HRT - follow the menus...

You may not get back all of the person you used to be but you can get pretty damn close especially early on in menopause - so that you can function and enjoy life. There really is no need to suffer! I was like you for much of peri-menopause - my flushes got really bad in late peri especially, which is when I started HRT. Now aged mid -60's and still taking it!

If we can help further then please ask

Hurdity x

[Jeepers]

Hi E

Welcome to the forum, and so sorry to hear how bad you are feeling.

I'm a really private person in RL, there are only 2 people who know I am on HRT, and one of them is my boyfriend.  I was so against it to start with, so afraid of it, but in the end I couldn't go on as I was, so eventually went down that route.  Yo#ll get lots of good advice on here on HRT and non-HRT routes, and as no-one knows who you are, you can be as open as you need to be.

With best wishes

Jeepers xx