Hi Agatha, please don't worry, nobody thinks you are moaning. This is a horrid thing to go through and anxiety is the absolute pits.
I too suffer from it. It's not too bad these last two days, but was hell on Monday. I downloaded the headspace app and have been meditating each morning since Tuesday and am feeling much more positive. I am not saying it's for everybody, but it is helping me. Or at least I think it is that that is helping.
Like you I have digestive problems and have gained weight. Although since cutting out coffee, tea and all things sugar, I have lost about nine pounds. I have also been taking something called silicole gel for stomach issues these past couple of days, and my stomach had definitely calmed down. It tastes disgusting but it also seems to be working.
I can easily find myself becoming nervous, about anything! And often when these feelings arise, I literally tell them to go away, but I'm stronger language lol. If that doesn't work I use Bach's rescue remedy and or Kalms. I am determined that this menopause lark will not beat me. I will be the winner.
I am peri menopausal, age 54,and for quite some time didn't realise what it was either, so don't beat yourself up about it.
Take care of yourself x