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[Happytobe]

My periods have stopped now but for the last 10 years of having them they were very heavy. This made me very scared and panicky
My daughter is 18 and her periods seem to be heavy too. I know this is silly but I get in the same anxious panicky state every time she has a period.  She has one now and I can't eat or do anything and I'm shaking with fear. I think she will bleed too much and maybe it will become an emergency. I know this is not a  reasonable reaction but I can't seem to help it. I'm sorry but could someone reassure me.

[CLKD]

Maybe both go to her GP and discuss what is 'normal'.  I had very heavy bleeds with intense pain.  Large clots.  A 10 day bleed with 10 day break. 

Making sure that you both eat well and keep hydrated.  Gentle exercise.  Appropriate pain relief if necessary.

[Happytobe]

I can't say it's as bad as that. The problem is that my daughter won't go to GP unless absolutely necessary due to her OCD. Thank you for replying I'm feeling so frantic.

[CLKD]

Is your daughter able to wear internal protection i.e. Tampax ?  I was never able to.  I  had to wear several pads at once under 2 pairs of knickers, as I would leak/flood.  Night times I would lay on a thick towel to protect the bed, again with 2 pads.  These needed changing every 2 hours.  When I stood up the blood would 'flood' out ........ fortunately the protection in general, caught the flow.

She is 18.  An adult.  Despite her OCD she will go to the GP if she feels it necessary, or she can get a phone-back by her GP.  At her age this is between the GP and herself.

Maybe you need to discover why you react in this way?  Is blood alien to you?  How were you raised to 'see' monthly bleeds?

[Happytobe]

I have health anxiety and it latched itself onto periods. I didn't have this fear until I was 42 until then I wasn't scared.
My daughter is 18 and an adult I agree but due to her issues she finds some things extremely difficult.

[CLKD]

So what would you like to happen?  Maybe keep a mood/food/symptom diary for 3 months which should give her some control.  What counselling etc. has she had for OCD?

[Happytobe]

The problem is my anxiety about her periods. I don't think she would think they were as bad as my anxiety about them is. I just want to be rid of this anxiety really.

[CLKD]

Anxiety can take over.  Have you spoken to your GP about symptoms?  When does the anxiety affect you?

Of course you worry about your daughter, you're her Mum  !

[Happytobe]

Yes I have spoken to GP about my anxiety and I have had a course of CBT which was very helpful. We have been through a very difficult 5 years with my daughter and sometimes everything gets on top of me and the old anxiety comes back. I need to revisit all the things I learnt in CBT.

[CLKD]

That isn't easy.  For me the anxiety strikes at once: many years ago a Psychologist tried to insist that I had thoughts that triggered the anxiety, well no, actually  .  The anxiety strikes me and then the thoughts begin!!  I left the session, never to return.

I have found deep breathing useful.  Also keeping a journal to chart triggers and reactions.  Venting released stuff from my brain, onto the paper and away.

[Happytobe]

Feeling a bit better today. I did find the CBT useful but as you say it isn't easy to keep it in mind and act on it when in a panic.
It's good you find writing and keeping a journal useful. I like to keep a journal of my thoughts and feelings.

[CLKD]

Tnx for the update.  Daughter has finished her period yet?

[Happytobe]

Yes her period more or less over probably why I feel better. Really need to get prepared for next one by trying the CBT again.

[CLKD]

Start this evening?  I used to forget to practice  or fall asleep with a cat on my lap.

What's the worst that could happen whilst she bleeds?

[Happytobe]

I have catastrophic thinking  in regard to periods ie. I fear that the worst you could imagine will happen. CBT suggests that we replace the catastrophic thought with a more realistic one. I do try to do this  .. but it's not always easy!