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[juju66]

Hi ladies, I'm new here. 

I'm 48, not really had too many symptoms so far except periods much heavier (and they were heavy to start with - I have fibroids  ). Thankfully though, they've gone from being every 3 weeks - resulting in anaemia - to every 32-35 days, which is much more manageable. I've also noticed I'm getting a lot of fatigue though, and my memory is getting dreadful.

I'm just wondering what to expect really, and when?  I know everyone's different, but do most of the symptoms (hot flushes, anxiety, etc) come before or after the periods stop? I'm assuming I'm in peri-menopause now. In your experience, is that the worse time? When do symptoms reach their peak? I suppose I'm trying to work out if I'm getting away with it lightly or has it just not kicked in yet!

The thing I'm most worried about is the mental health stuff. I had a terrible bout of depression/anxiety about 12 years ago and I'm terrified that menopause will bring it back. I didn't get on with any of the ADs I tried so I can't even look forward to some relief with them.

Sorry for being long winded, thanks for any info.

[Dancinggirl]

Hi and welcome to MM juju66
TRy not to worry. As you said, we are all different so how we experience the meno will be different. Do read up all the info on this site and get really clued up. HRT can help if you experience anxiety but I think if you understand what is happening at this time in our lives (many women are completely unprepared) this can help to alleviate some anxiety as you can then have strategies in place to help you cope. Lifestyle is vital - exercise and good diet can be helpful. There was a recent AMerican study that showed the average timescale for the menopause was 7 years and I assume this is from the start of peri meno when many women first notice changes in their cycle, flushes etc. The severity of symptoms can vary widely as well.
Keep posting.  DG x

[juju66]

Thanks, Dancinggirl. 

I suppose what I'm wondering in a nutshell is whether the symptoms are usually worse before or after the periods stop? Because of my age I thought I must be in peri-meno, but I've not really had any symptoms like flushing, so does that mean I'm not?

In most people's experience, is peri-meno when it the worst of it happens? Does it stop being so bad after the periods stop?

[Annie0710]

Hi and welcome

I'm 48 and have been told I'm peri, then post, now they're saying peri !
I've maybe had one flush ?
I had hysterectomy age 32 and ovaries stopped working properly, oestrogen was very low and not one hot flush , but did have night sweats which my hrt sorted

Some say peri is worse until hormones settle down, others say they still feel bad post meno

Personally I think surely the majority of women should feel somewhat better ? I looked at older ladies (65+) and lots seem happy !

I would love to go to a pensioners day centre and have real in depth chats with the ladies !

Annie xx

[Dancinggirl]

juju66 - I doubt anyone will be able to answer you question.  Through the peri stage the hormones tend to fluctuate so symptoms may come and go. Some find the peri stage ok and then really suffer when they get into post meno, whilst others find everything settles down 1-2 years into post meno. Take each day as it comes - try treatments like HRT if appropriate as, when and if you need it.  DG x

[Hurdity]

Hi juju66

 

I agree with the others and as Dancinggirl says we can't tell you what your menopause will be like. For instance I didn't experience any of the traditional symptoms of flushes and sweats until my periods stopped and when I had bouts of stopping and starting for a few months - when the flushes stopped I thought whoopee that was it. End of periods end of flishes! However the flushes stopping heralded a re-start of my periods. In my case they only got really bad in very late menopausal transition. Some women get off fairly lightly and then two years after last period suddenly experience symptoms ( and especially vaginal problems) since oestrogen levels decline following the last period and around two years later reach their all time low - other things being equal.

Hurdity x

[CLKD]

   I tried 5 different anti-depressant medications in the 1990s before I found one that kind of worked and stuck with that for over 9 years before it pooped out.  Then I had others.  What couldn't you tolerate?  ADs are not a cure but a way of coping better than without 

[juju66]

Thanks for all your info, ladies. I just felt rather confused as none of the info I'd read seemed to be definite about what happened and when, but I guess it's just an individual thing.

CLKD - I was prescribed Citalopram but that sent my anxiety through the roof, so I had to come off. Next I tried Effexor but that made me very physically ill, then a tricyclic which was worst of all - I felt suicidal for several days on that.  After that I was petrified to try anything else, but agreed to try a tiny dose of Prozac. It had no effect one way or the other (the dose was probably too small and I was too scared to increase it) so I just decided to go it alone.

Thankfully, after about a couple of years or so the depression/anxiety began to lift, but to be honest I couldn't go through all that again. 

[CLKD]

Some medications can do the 'opposite' of what they were designed for.  Prozac made me have raging temper ……. Effexor suited me absolutely fine 

Maybe try yoga and general relaxation therapy.  Some people use St John's Wort    ……. for anxiety I take a beta-blocka and have an emergency tablet for when the anxiety floors me …….. without which I wouldn't survive.

Menopause ain't written in blocks of stone sadly or we would all be reading off the same page, even the GPs  .  Keeping a food/mood diary might be useful. 

How are you this evening?