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[CLKD]

How do you feel about joining in groups?  I love mixing until anxiety takes over 

I love: reading, watching TV, gardening, walking, cycling; our village has a gardening club, sewing group, Church events, the chapel holds coffee/lunches most days of the week …….. the local Council has a Volunteer Beuruax too ……...

[Micky]

I cant pretend to be the most confident person CLKD or the most outgoing - but with age & since becoming single again, I realise that I have to make an effort to try to establish a life for myself ...Its just getting up the courage, not taking the option of hiding away ...Of course I cant do anything when anxiety strikes, It takes all my energy to just walk the dog & then I cant wait to get back home and I really am a wreck ..

[CLKD]

I know. It gets me like that too.  Could you do phone support for a help line? something from home for a few hours? also have a look at the Cinnamon web-site, if you have dogs you may fit in to help someone who has pets.

Begin by making those boundaries 

[Kathleen]

Hello Micky.

I agree with the other ladies but wanted to add that maybe some counselling would help you deal with the difficult feelings you have regarding your parents and this would develop your confidence.

Back in the day many people were trapped in unhappy marriages and were forced to tolerate each other as best they could. I was once told that the great thing about arguing and bickering is that it guarantees lots of attention, so much better than being ignored !

Whatever you decide to do I wish you luck and hopefully you'll keep us updated as your situation is not an unusual one.

Take care.

K.

[Micky]

Thank you CLKD the cinnamon trust sounds interesting..

Kathleen thank you too -I tend to think I am the only one that has such difficult parents, and although mention it here its not something I broadcast to all I meet or who know me  ....Its a strange kind of role reversal almost, I feel as I become the parent and observer of two very badly behaved children  - their views, attitudes , negativity and judgemental comments shock me at times and make me feel ashamed/embarrassed that they are my parents.. They are both 80 & whilst i make allowances for their age and the difference of generation they grew up in & there are the odd things I agree with and can understand etc..But for the most part they are dreadful - I just have to practice more deafness I think.

[CLKD]

Could I have your deafness please  ………… they are 80 so have had plenty of practice!!! sometimes I find it amusing but not often