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[latefortysomething]

Hello,
I don't know if it's just me but at 51 I just feel as though I look awful (as bad as I feel most days).   No clothes seem to fit, any outfit bar jeans and the same top seem just ok.  I used to love wearing long skirts, now my confidence levels are at an all time low.  Thinning hair, not the prettiest of faces...I could go on.  I don't know if it's just me but has anyone else been suffering with a crippling lack of self confidence?  I feel like have to apologise for my appearance most days... I used to love "dressing" up and doing hair occasionally..Anyone else feeling like this too?

[Joyce]

Just had one of those moments today. I have an incisional hernia which makes my tum look bigger, so guess what I noticed trying on maxis for my holiday. 

[latefortysomething]

I am sorry cuba, that's not great understatement, poor thing...can this be corrected?

[Joyce]

Can be corrected but said they'd only deal with it if hernia was causing problem. Sticking out was not what they meant unfortunately.

[honeybun]

My mother told me today that I was putting on weight....actually no I have lost a few pounds, and that my hair colour did not suit me.
With friends like that......


I am much the same size as I have been for years it's just the distribution is different. I don't have much of a waist anymore so clothes just don't look right.



Honeyb
x

[tiger74]

http://www.menopausematters.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,23889.msg363682.html#msg363682

Hi - I started a thread on here as I was fed up about my dull and thinning hair.  I wondered if some of the suggestions might be useful.

Some days I feel a lack of confidence - usually worse when I'm tired.

All the best.

[Joyce]

Just ordered a dress from BHS looks like it might disguise the bulging bit. Fingers crossed. Might need it shortened, but that's fine. Its an oriental floral maxi, very much my colours.

My weight has gone up a bit since last year, but mainly due to lack of exercise. So need to work on that over coming weeks. Clothes still fit though.

[Mrs January]

Hey ladies!!!

We all have the maturity of life upon us, we are unique, individual and fabulous people. I have gained 3 stone since last year and yeah I care about it, had thinning hair, more wrinkles, have to wear glasses, but hey my body and wrinkles are as my new man says the map of my life!!! how kind, lets accept ourselves and not batter ourselves.

Love and hugs

Mrs January xxxx

[latefortysomething]

Hi,
Many thanks for replying to my thread, and interesting to read your replies too.  Mrs January "not battering" ourselves is certainly one to remember! Pleased to hear about your new man, great stuff!

Sparkle:  That's how I feel, you have summed it up well, that impending sense of doom, plus everything else, not easy I know.  As for the clothes, yes, that's me too However superficial, it matters just a wee bit!   I know there are far more important things in life right now, but it's this confidence thing is it not?  I do feel for you re. anxiety issue, hope things improve. XX

Cubagirl, I hope they will correct this condition, not pleasant for you! ,  I know surgery is such a traumatic thing to go through, however I hope they help you with this.  Is it difficult to exercise at present, excuse my ignorance with this.  Glad you have managed to find something nice to wear, are loose fitting tunics good to wear?  (I love leggings and tunics however my sense of style is not great), my legs even worse (the varicose veins are something else), not a pretty sight hence leggings (and extra long tunics).  Hope dress is good when it turns up!

Honeybun:  Yep the mum thing I know,  it's interesting that with all of us it seems to be weight distribution? Pesky hormones?

Tiger: thanks for link, I'll have a look at this.  Sorry to hear you have this problem too.  , I have lost so much, can't say it does not affect me as well, I look awful some days!
It's so fine and horrible argh!, I tend to go of cycling to get any where these days...cycling helmet is great er..though do take it off eventually!

Ah well, nice to hear from you all and hope that you have a pleasant weekend, just can't believe we are in July already...where did the year go?
LFS



Tiger I have just updated post, I am so sorry you have been through so much, you poor thing.  I hope things are improving for you?  I can't imagine what you have been through.   All the very best and keep well!  Sorry I should have read your post before replying.
XX

[tiger74]

No worries, LFS.  Hope some of the hair tips are useful.

Hope you have a good weekend too.  I'm planning a quiet one after a busy week at work.

[dulciana]

One of the things I do to try to stay reasonably young-looking and keep my self-confidence up is to wear contact lenses instead of specs.  Does seem to help.  I know not everyone gets on with contacts, but they're fine for me and means I avoid ageing frames and long-sight lenses on my face.   My mum wished she could have tried contacts so I made a deal with myself, while she was still alive, to use them.  I'm so glad I did.  They're varifocal, work brilliantly and most of the time I don't know I'm wearing them.
 

[Ju Ju]

I didn't know you could get varifocal contacts. I queried about them several years ago. I was told I could have contacts for long sight, but would still need glasses for reading. The one thing about wearing glasses all the time is that you know where they are! I look so much better without glasses or is that because I'm a blur in the mirror without them? 

 I don't like looking like my mum. I feel sorry for my daughter when people say we look alike, but she doesn't mind. The one thing I do like is I look a lot younger than 60. I enjoy the shock when people find out how old I am.

[Mrs January]

Hey

I would love to wear contact lenses and did try but because I have a hand tremor sadly they are a no no .... I scatted my cornea twice in trying then ...Grr so painful xxx

[Joyce]

Think one eye gets a long sight lens one a short sight one. Had a boss who had hers thus way, but she really struggled with them. Apparently the brain compensates so you see properly, or that's what she told me. Me I'll stick to glasses thanks, I only really need for reading.

[Ju Ju]

I do forget I have them on. I will start to wash my face with them on sometimes.