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[Houndielady]

Well, Ive stumbled upon this forum while researching perimenopausal symptoms. I feel very alone and as if I'm losing my mind. Here we go.

I'll be 43 in August, I went to the doctor about a year ago with what I would basically call depression and very strong PMS, my mood swings and attitude were damaging my closest relationships with family and I just wanted to curl up and hide. she prescribed Prozac (fluoxetine), it really helped, I felt like I was coming out from under a cloud. I was on it every day for about 4 months, then just to take it 10 days before each period. She didn't test me for hormone levels - felt I was too young. This has been great, although the dark thoughts are creeping back on the days I dont take the tablets.

Should also say, I've always had heavyish periods, but about 6 years ago I donated eggs for IVF for my sister. I was hyperstimulated, they harvested 20 eggs on the day and I was back in the hospital a week later, still producing. Since this my periods became horrific, flooding and clotting, I've been given tablets, then the mirena and finally about 14 months ago endometrial ablasion. My periods are now light spotting and I only require panty liners 

Last month I had 2 periods within 4 weeks, the month previous, my period was 10 days late.

It has been suggested that perhaps the egg donation has brought forward my menopause?

I'm at a loss as to what to do.

I have a feeling of doom, can't avoid worrying. No panic attacks. NO hot flashes. I feel tired all the time. No interest in things I used to love.

I made an appointment with my GP for the beginning of next month, hoping to press for hormone tests.

Also, I've been married for 20 years, we have an 18 year old and a 15 year old daughters. 4 rescued dogs (2 greyhounds and 2 lurchers) my other children! We also have all the standard money and family worries (life is not perfect!)

Really just looking for support and to see if I'm going mad!

Thanks,
Jan xx

[Evenstar]

Hi Jan. Fairly new here myself but there are some lovely ladies on here.
Am sure one of them will  beable to shed some light.    just wanted to say what a lovely thing to do donating eggs for your sister. She must be so proud of you.
   Sending hugs xxxxx

[Houndielady]

Thanks Evenstar,
it was just the right thing at the time, I had eggs, she didn't, I offered, her and hubby said yes. Everything went great fabulous embryos, but unfortunately they didn't embed and they were unsuccessful, so sad
I know the joy I had from my own children (which she has always borrowed and called "her girls"), I had hoped to help her experience the highs and lows of parenthood for herself. But it wasn't meant to be.

[CLKD]

No one warns ladies as to the 'side effects' of donation  and how it can play with their own hormones.  Even with the best intentions it can be an awful journey!  I don't think this would bring on menopause? your Consultant who over-saw your treatment programme should have more idea 

   you are NOT going mad.  You are going through 'the change'  which can make us all feel a little mad at times.  Hopefully when you have had a good browse round you will feel less alone  - have you read down the menus on the left of screen?  We also have a humurous 'room' 

Hormone tests can be unreliable because of the surges of hormones we experience.  My Gynae won't do them.  Results can be used as a guide. 

You sound as though you might benefit from an anti-depressant 24/7 to even out the gloom and doom feelings - common, you are not alone!  Begin taking care of YOU!  You have done your bit for your sister, your girls are growing and will require a lot more input yet but they should be able to help around the house etc.?  Browse round, join in!

[Evenstar]

Thanks Evenstar,
it was just the right thing at the time, I had eggs, she didn't, I offered, her and hubby said yes. Everything went great fabulous embryos, but unfortunately they didn't embed and they were unsuccessful, so sad
I know the joy I had from my own children (which she has always borrowed and called "her girls"), I had hoped to help her experience the highs and lows of parenthood for herself. But it wasn't meant to be.

Oh that is sad.   I was very late coming to parenthood myself so I know how she must feel about becoming a Mum herself. :(xxxx

[Houndielady]

Thanks for the welcome CLKD,
Regarding the donation, I went into it with my eyes open, it was my idea and I wanted to try to give them a chance.

It was a colleague in work (she is quite a wee herbal remedy believer lady who has had to have a hysterectomy about a year ago at 37), she also has a good knowledge of pharma stuff. She was saying how at conception we are allocated a fixed amount of eggs, when they near full depletion hormones start shifting a bit. Its just a theory, I don't know.

I'll be having a good snuffle around and probably venting a little to you lovely ladies for support. Its lovely to be safe in an environment of people experiencing the same thing.

I'm not mad or alone. I could cry ! x