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Author Topic: What's the best thing your partner has done to help you through the menopause?  (Read 472827 times)

Michelle7474

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My husband like myself didn’t and still don’t understand all this peri/menopause
He couldn’t understand how it effects the whole of me ( aniexty etc ) having never suffering this until this year

He always says we get through it and this is part of life now babe ( it’s not a good thing for him to say lol but I suppose to him it’s so I will get used to it )
He listens all the time I don’t think he actually takes it in but just listening is good enough for me
If he had a wand to take it all away I know he would

We have been together far to long for this to interfere with our marriage as we come as a package & the next 10 or more years I’m his package lol 😂

He said he looks at me sometimes & feels sorry for me as he knows this gets too much for me but he will always try his hardest to cheer me up or take my mind off things.

He can’t help me but him just being around is good enough .. I sound like a broken record sometimes but he just takes in his stride

I’ve not felt the angry feelings yet …. & I hope I never do but Maybe then things will change and he might run for the hills 😂😂😂😂😂😂

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Ljhooray

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Acknowledge it and understand that sometimes the symptoms are something beyond my control.  He has proactively looked to get educated on it and he was the one that recommended the David McCall documentary after he watched it.  He also encourages me to take time out for myself and spots the signs when I need to get out and run it off!
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Florrie2

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My husband has supported me through 3 years of extreme stress, anxiety, depression (which I now think was peri-menopause) followed by utter hysterical paranoia around covid whilst waiting 9 months for a hysterectomy (he admitted he had found me really difficult to be with).. some of this whilst going through his own depression due to furlough…

And now he wants to know all my updates on my latest VA trials and makes me laugh when I start to stress about it, by asking which is the latest ‘lab lube’  ;D

I am one lucky lady  :)
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Tulip

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My partner is a total legend, he understands as best he can. We've always discussed everything with each other, and that's been a really important factor in our relationship.
I feel sorry for partners of meno ladies, it can't be an easy road if we're going through it, and I've been hit with the sh1tty end of the hormone stick, so I'm incredibly grateful to have the love and support.  :)
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PeriWhat?!

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Such a tricky question. He's been like a rabbit in the headlights, although that obviously has meant he has stuck around. Last time I tried to talk to him about my peri symptoms, he just said they'd been really difficult for him, which gave me the rage, so I stopped trying to have that conversation and did a lot of research about divorce/shared parenting/rental prices etc.
I have been difficult to live with, but so have these symptoms. It's been darker than dark and I've been so grateful for this forum. I've wanted to leave him with every mood swing. Now I'm absorbing lots of oestrogen through my skin every day, I like him again. This will probably also be quite confusing for him.
It all makes me wonder if men and women are really designed to live together long-term, or if oestrogen is just the veil that makes us tolerate our fellas through our fertile years. ;D
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sheila99

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I was hoping how I was in my fertile years was 'normal' and the ranting old hag I became was the aberration! Funnily enough I felt the same about my OH. He's my soul mate but if wasn't for DD who was too young to leave I could easily have walked out. I'm so glad I didn't.
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PeriWhat?!

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I'm hoping I'll feel that way in the long run too, @Sheila99. Fingers crossed.
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Kathleen

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Hello ladies.

I saw an interview with Louise Newson and she said that she experienced terrible moods when her meno began. She considered leaving her husband  but her young daughters pointed out that if that happened they would rather live with their father because she was always being so mean!

Sheila99 - I also think back to my pre meno days when I felt 'normal' and wish I could have stayed like that. Unfortunately Mother Nature had different plans.

Take care ladies.

K.
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PeriWhat?!

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That's good point, Kathleen!
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Techigirl

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My husband has been my best friend throughout and more understanding than some of my female friends and colleagues  in dealing with my less friendly days.   He’s always been willing to listen when I need to get out how I feel and then give me a hug and tell me he loves me.  No magic fix but I know he’s there even on the worst days as my champion.
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Nik2502

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My husband is wonderful. He’s supported me every step of the way and it’s not been easy. Me crying every day, anxious, paranoid - nothing like the younger person I was. Yet he encourages me, holds me, loves me, talks to me, makes me feel like I’m his whole world.
I just wish I could feel better and be the woman he fell in love with 30 years ago xx
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Mandypands

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My husband has fully supported me leaving my job this month. Working for a call centre for the last 2 years where people are regularly abusive, rude, shouting, difficult etc. has really taken its toll on my mental and physical health, as I have been trying to push through work days while suffering a variety of sh*tty perimenopause symptoms. Anxiety went through the roof certain times of the month and started to suffer panic attacks and uncontrollable crying while trying to work. My husband is encouraging me to take time out and put myself first and concentrate on feeling better.
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Julila

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My husband is always ready to bring me everything I need. He also is a perferct listener so he knows how to support me
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KaycieB

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Re: What's the best thing your partner has done to help you through the menopause?
« Reply #283 on: September 27, 2022, 12:44:44 PM »

The best thing my husband did was leave me before I started the menopause! It's lovely to read of your supporting husbands, hold on to them no matter how bad you feel!
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PeriWhat?!

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Thanks for posting this @KaycieB it can't have ben easy for you, but it does help those of us with less than perfect relationships!
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