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Menopause Matters magazine ISSUE 75 out now. (Spring issue, March 2024)

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Author Topic: What's the best thing your partner has done to help you through the menopause?  (Read 472800 times)

michele

  • Guest

My husband is trying really hard to support me through this - I must drive him absolutely mad but he just says you will come through this - he really is a special man and I am really lucky.

Michele
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traceyvk

  • Guest

My husband has been a rock for me.  My menopause started when I was 35, so around 4 years ago, and every symptom you can have associated with it, I have had  :'( .   When I am tired, he will take over the household chores, cooking, etc and let me sleep.

When I am sad, he comforts me. 

When I am in pain, he will make me drinks, hot water bottles and again do things for me. 

He never complains or judges me about the menopause, he sees it as a temporary set back, and knows I will be better eventually. 

He is always there for me no matter what, without him I think I would be on anti depressents to deal with the menopause.  ::)
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sandra dee

  • Guest

Hi

I have only just realised that I am going through the peri and as such have tried to get my hubby, Ste to understand, I've even read the thread on husbands to him this morning.  He said that he will try and understadn more. A couple of hours later, whilst shopping, I was getting a little flustered and started getting anxious.  Instead of understanding and trying to calm me, he did the opposite and we ended up rowing - even though he said he'll try to understand!  He usually is good but if he doesnt wake up and understand  howI feel then we will have the 3rd world war in our house.  Lets hope it is early days and he will eventually understand and not take things that I say personally.  And hopefully with everyones help and support, I start to feel better too  :-*
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Taz2

  • Member
  • *
  • Posts: 26667
Re: What's the best thing your partner has done to help you through the menopaus
« Reply #18 on: September 08, 2008, 07:26:02 AM »

Have a look at the top of the "All things menopause" thread and you will find a post "advice to husbands" - it may be worth printing this off and asking your husband to read it. It is a strange time for the men in our life - they are suddenly living with someone they don't really know anymore. My friend has put it on her fridge and everytime her partner is less than understanding she just looks at him and says "Fridge" and he understands!

Love Taz x
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amandahh

  • Guest

Hello, I am so lucky with My Hugh, although he has all sorts of problems, himself with On going chronic Osteo-arthritis, of the spine, hips and knees,partially sighted and deaf, Hugh is really great to me he says I just wish he could do more. He makes me rest as much as possible , as I suffer from Anxiety, He makes me warm drinks brings up hotties for me and makes sure he is there for me. How sweet he is.He is my best Friend and soul mate too. regards Amandahh
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deni

  • Guest

When I first started feeling unwell with this meno thing, he was concerned and patient, however when we visited the GP and he told us that it was the start of peri-menopause! and all my obs were ok he changed and if I have an off day his comment is "well your not ill, the doctor told you so"

He has started losing his hair and moans about the others hairs turing grey, my answer to him "well your not ill". ;D

Seriously tho he does his best, but like some men,  mine is one of them, his input "woman's problems are best kept amongst woman"!

Deni

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manypaws

  • Guest

Hes  here for me  and hes wonderful as he has put up with everything I have thrown at him and seems to know when to keep his distance and when to give me a cuddle  mind that hasnt come easy  ;D
Ive got a good n

and at times he must have felt as thoguh he is married to a lunatic and there is nowwhere for men to share their thoughts or problems with as its not the thing to talk about down at the pub or wherever  so a round of applause to the men in our lifes i say :clapping:

I know i would be list without mine

Manypaws
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Jacksfullofaces

  • Guest

My husband is super. His sexual prowess  is amazing and boy is he well hung. He cooks, cleans earns an excellent salary and last weekend bought me a large ruby and diamond ring. What more could I ask for ?
Well I do wish that he wouldn't go out once a month to play chess leaving me at home.
      Jacksfullofaces
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Jax

  • Guest

I have always felt my hubby hasn't supported me enough through menopause, mainly because whenever I want to discuss my feelings with him he closes up like a book. He doesn't like talking about 'womens' problems. Sometimes though us womenfolk need to 'talk' to our partners, we need to explain why we are acting as we do, why we get frustrated and why sometimes we turn the other cheek even though we don't mean to be hurtful.

He does however show his support in other ways by doing a lot of the shopping/housework when I am feeling low which goes a long way to making me feel better. I even sent him to collect my HRT prescription and he came back home with a bottle of perfume. That made me feel wanted, feminine and cherished  :)

Luv Jax x  :worm:
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Jacksfullofaces

  • Guest

Jax
Sounds like you have a nice husband there. He just gets embarrassed about the menopause. I'm fortunate that mine will discuss it with me and I sent him to collect my ovestin cream
          Jacksfullofaces
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kim8365

  • Guest

My hubby doesn't ask me how i feel just keeps telling people i'm going through the menopause esp in the pub , and i wish he wouldn't i don't want them knowing,also the pass few day's weve hardly spoke theres been an atmosphere and he's been off work last wk on hol's,e.g  saturday he was in the living on the laptop and i was in the dining room on the pc and we never spoke for over 2 hrs, i just can't talk to him he switches off, the past 3 night's ive not even had a kiss good night, one was my fault cos he annoyed me and i didn't want one, weve been married nearly 25 yrs and i feel we can't carry on like this, i feel like he doesn't care.
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Jacksfullofaces

  • Guest

Kim
Have you and husband always had communication problems ? Mine is the quiet type and inclined to sulk if he gets annoyed. I have been known to explode and box his ears.
I should ask him why he switches off and the reasons for him discussing the menopause in the pub with other people.
If you don't like his behaviour the only answer is to confront him. Maybe if you wrote him a note it might help. Some people are better at reading things and working them out.
Just a thought
Jacksfullofaces
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smudges

  • Guest

ummm, mostly tut and shake his head, then walk away ;D
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tiilycat

  • Guest

My hubby tries to make me laugh, and most days it works, but not on my very dark days :angryfire:, then he just gives me the space to do my own thing, i do give him a bad time sometimes, dont know how he puts up with me ::) Tiilycat. x 
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Jacksfullofaces

  • Guest

My husband teases me, spoils me and makes me scream with laughter. If he thinks I'm viewing things through Menopause spectacles he rightly tells me off - although he pampers me most of the time
    Jacksfullofaces
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