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[Susievintage]

Hello everyone. I am currently on HRT tablets, which are fab at controlling all the usual stuff
(hot flushes, anxiety, etc.) and also on Ovestin cream and now Vagifem pessaries (less messy…) for the vagina issues. But I am wondering whether this is actually right for my own vagina issues.

I am lucky in that I don’t seem to have the usual symptoms of VA – pain on urination, itching,
UTIs and so on – but what I do have is extremely painful sex! In fact, my husband can’t even get his penis in more than an inch these days – it’s as though there’s a block there, which burns when he pushes (do you remember the “Chinese burns” we used to do on people’s arms in school?!) and of course when he pushes and I wince, he wilts!

I have tried using dilators, which is a pretty dismal experience. And now I have bought some Yes vaginal moisturiser and some lubrication, in a bid to make it all more comfy down there.

What I am asking, in short, is whether anyone has had the same issues – no traditional VA
symptoms, but just painful sex, almost like the walls of the vagina have clamped shut? I can
use the Vagifem applicator with no discomfort, but anything penis-sized is no go! I am
wondering whether Vagifem is worth using, given that it’s a VA solution and I don’t seem to have VA…

[joziel]

Have you tried using the Vagifem and Ovestin every day for several weeks?

Can you ask your GP if you can try Intrarosa instead of the Vagifem? Intrarosa is a pessary like the Vagifem but it's DHEA which can be converted locally into both testosterone and estrogen. Many women, when they have VA symptoms which don't respond to estrogen, need testosterone up there - but not directly, only via DHEA which is converted to testosterone.

You can also try adding testosterone gel to your current HRT as well.

It would also be worth seeing your GP in the first instance and even a pelvic floor physio to try to understand what the issue is. You might indeed have a prolapse, for example.

[bombsh3ll]

How long have you had the issue?

I have vaginal stenosis as a result of obstetric injury, since my daughter's birth when I was 33.

I am also not able to have penetrative intercourse or use tampons.

For me it is structural and nothing to do with estrogen levels.

Has anything happened to you such as obstetric injury, gynaecological surgery etc?

You mentioned using dilators which are often given to women after certain kinds of surgery.

If you are adequately estrogenised and still have the problem, I would suggest seeing your GP for an examination.

[Susievintage]

Thank you all so much for taking the time to consider this matter for me!

A couple of clarifications: I have never had children and thankfully no down-below trauma or injury, so I think something physical like a prolapse is unlikely.  I have regular smear tests (always a fun day out...) and although they are uncomfortable, they are possible and the nurse has never mentioned anything amiss with my layout.

The dilators were a private purchase rather than prescribed - I was trying anything!

I think for now I am going to increase the use of the Vagifem, add the Estriol cream that I have left over from a previous prescription, and try with the Yes moisturiser and some lubrication - as someone commented, the romance is going to be hard to capture!!

If that does not work, I shall go to the doc for Intrarosa.  My doc is good in that she's willing to prescribe pretty much what I ask for, but her personal position is "why don't you just shut up shop down there - that's what I did when I hit menopause".  So she thinks I'm a bit odd for wanting to solve this, but she's happy to support my efforts!

Thank you all again - I shall try the above for a few weeks and then report back... (or maybe I'll be too exhausted from all the athletic sex to reach the keyboard  ).

[pepperminty]

Hi,

There are good reports regarding the inspire silicone dilators, which are less rigid and start very small, ( finger size). Put plenty of Yes  VM on etc. Also vagifem should help. Your local sexual health clinic can be helpful, and a referral to a women's health physio ( or go onto the squeezy app and find a private one ) can help with a tight pelvic floor. 

PMX

[AngelaH]

Hi susievintage,
In menopause the vagina naturally shrinks and of course it creates problems. I also would like to mention that we all have different vaginas, some can be naturally narrow and until meno hits it may not be a big issue and it only becomes the problem when you give birth. But in menopause it may create more problems than normal shapes vaginas.

[Suziemc]

I don't have quite as bad an experience as you describe, mine is after a minute or two it starts to burn. I describe it as carpet burns! And yep, when I wince he wilts. It's got to the point where, if I initiate sex, he worries so much about hurting me it's not the pleasurable experience for either of us that it once was.

I use Yes lubricant - my husband calls it my WD40 - in addition to vagifem 3 times a week (and my transdermal oestrogen too) and this, generally speaking, keeps me comfortable for having sex without carpet burns every few weeks.

I hope you manage to find something to make things comfortable for you as I agree,  shutting up shop isn't a reasonable option.

Suzie