Hey Poppy,
You sound angry and frustrated and I get that. I am almost a year in, on 125 estradot and coil. Not so much for staving off age related problems but to control hormonal symptoms. I am 56 and still get monthly periods ( no bleeds as such, as on coil ) but am attempting to suppress ovulation to improve cyclical moods swings from pms and pmdd symptoms.
There are several older forum members, who are still getting periods. Mine are very regular, no erratic changes we are told will happen.
Like you I do not feel all professionals know a definitive knowledge about peri\meno so we get told different things and try different regimes..sometimes I cannot see and end. One year on an still feel worse in many respects. Frustrating doesn't come close....
Have you looked at the alternative thread for women who do not all use hrt? Maybe ways to protect your body without hrt???
Wish you well. And I LOVE capitals in a post.😁