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[GetStuffedPeri]

Is anyone prepared to be completely honest about just how angry/emotional they get?  I feel it's often something that people don't want to admit, but this side of things is just as real as the physical symptoms.  There are of course certain "crying at anything" moments that we can genuinely laugh at but the rage side of things is rarely talked about 

[sheila99]

Bad. I would have divorced me. Useful for telling ignorant doctors what you think though... 

[Ladybt28]

GetStuffedPeri - I am happy to put it on here and the gory details are in other posts because I don't want others to think that they are literally "going mad" in their heads....Its their bodies which are going "mad" and our health professionals should be able to diagnose instead of sending us for counselling...telling us we have "issues" and pumping us full of AD's when it is hormones out of wack!  Not to put to finer point on it - I was "certifiable".  I would have been defined as having a complete mental breakdown although it was actually a "hormonal breakdown".  Funny enough despite having two screaming fits in the GP's in front of a terrified doctor with the whole waiting room hearing every word no "medical professional" clocked what was going on despite knowing I had a history of PMT, postnatal depression, problems with the pill and I was over 50! with joint pain, nausea, headaches, insomnia and just about everything else other than VA!

My story is all over this forum under my name although it is not known outside it. Everything was completely hidden except from the GP's and my husband and sons! It was pretty dramatic and horrific.  I suffered from rage, odd behaviour, crying, duvet days and had a severe urge to "run away".  Not just "running away from everything" like we all do sometimes but actually physically "running away" usually in the middle of the night which I did on several occasions. I had it in my head I needed to get to my friends house and she lives in England which is a plane journey away! and the airport is 10 miles from my home!  I didn't call a taxi to get there I just would get up and walk!  Anyway the really bad bit lasted 18 months and the "medical professionals" were absolutely useless.  I did end up at one good counsellor who said "there is nothing wrong with you head, you are suffering from a really bad menopause - go back to you doctor" but I had a battle on my hands when I tried and took a while to get sorted.  This forum was my lifesaver when I found it and has been ever since and helped me pretty much crack it cos I realised I wasn't mad at all!  xx

Once I was on the right hrt - everything gone! strange that and nothing like any of it since.  I am happy to put it on here and the gory details are in other posts because I don't want others to think that they are literally "going mad" in their heads....Its their bodies which are going "mad" and our health professionals should be able to diagnose instead of sending us for counselling...telling us we have "issues" and pumping us full of AD's when it is hormones out of wack!

[Kathleen]

Hello GetStuffedPeri and welcome to the forum.

I have had irrational rage in the past though thankfully that phase appears to be over. Well, I certainly hope so.

I remember wondering if that was how fourteen year old boys feel when they had testosterone surges. I remember my son having anger episodes at that age. He is in his mid twenties now but reminds me that all his friends behaved the same way at that time in their lives.

These days I am battling irritability and tearfulness which comes out of nowhere but likes to linger for hours.

I am fortunate that I seem to have escaped some of the meno symptoms, muscle pain for example but the mood swings very disconcerting. 

My GP told me recently that HRT was good at controlling the physical symptoms but less so the emotional ones.  No sh@t Sherlock I hear you cry lol!

I think it's helpful to talk more about the mental aspect of the menopause because the fear that you are going mad is a very real one in my experience.

Take care everyone.

K.





 

[CLKD]

I had rages within a few days of each period.  What wouldn't bother me for the rest of the month would really 'get me' - a remark, something DH did/not ....... suddenly, I would snap.  Nothing would stop the rage until I had shouted myself out: once the bleed began, the bad temper went away.  Until the next month.

When angry I would throw things.  Nothing expensive  .  I would also mutter - usually when DH had annoyed me without any reason, when he found me then I would throw something  - the last time, over 20+ years ago, was a wet dishcloth.  He wrung it out on the kitchen floor and threw it back.  Then I had the floor to mop 

OH! and I would kick doors too  .  Stamp my feet like a 2 year old.  Mutter; not always quietly. My favourite word to date is 'f**k' ........ so if anyone could give me another word that isn't as recognisable?

It is known the PMT can cause women to commit murder, certainly Dr Dalton went to Court with several who were accused.  One had killed her Mum 

Did U now explain to the GP Kathleen    . 

[Fusseh]

For several days each month I feel suicidal. Other times I feel relatively normal. It's like a switch goes off and things just go round and round in my head. It is usually around an issue that I blow up. I become totally irrational...but it feels rational. I try to tell myself it's hormones but the feelings are very strong.

This usually happens just after I get my period so maybe progesterone withdrawal.

I have been on Evorel Sequi for nearly a year. It has helped all my other symptoms but this one. Considering ADs.

Thanks for the thread. We must talk about this

Fusseh

[CLKD]

HORMONES   

I would sob the night B4 a bleed even if a period wasn't due - OK after.  Until the next month.

[Hurdity]

For several days each month I feel suicidal. Other times I feel relatively normal. It's like a switch goes off and things just go round and round in my head. It is usually around an issue that I blow up. I become totally irrational...but it feels rational. I try to tell myself it's hormones but the feelings are very strong.

This usually happens just after I get my period so maybe progesterone withdrawal.

I have been on Evorel Sequi for nearly a year. It has helped all my other symptoms but this one. Considering ADs.

Thanks for the thread. We must talk about this

Fusseh

Fusseh - sorry to hear this. It does sound like it could partly be progesterone withdrawal. This could be exacerbated as your own progesterone withdrawal after ovulation along with the change back to oestrogen only patch could be making it far worse than it need be....

Why not consider one of the COC pills that are designed for peri-menopausal women, instead of HRT? I mean it depends how old you are and how far into menopause but if you are under 50 and your periods were still pretty regular then maybe HRT is not right for you just yet? These pills (QLARA and ZOELY) contain estradiol ie bio-identcial oestrogen just like HRT but they suppress the cycle so avoiding the extreme mood swings, and don't have a whole tablet free week (Qlaira only has two days without added oestrogen). Qlaira has 3 different oestrogen doses throughout the month and the progestogen is one of the newer generation ones that are more user friendly so I'm told.

Personally in your position I would rather try something like this than anti-depressants as these are not indicated for hormonal anxiety due to peri-menopause. Maybe worth thinking about?

Hurdity x

[warwick01]

Ladybt28 - sounds like me at the moment. Since reducing my oestrogel to 2 pumps I have noticed I am more aggressive, I experience really bad low mood at times, instant floods of tears,  intrusive thoughts. Also wake during the night wanting to just run away.

During the day I feel spacey, my eyes feel like they are out of focus...? bloody fed up. get rid of one symptom another pops up

I got my Oestodol checked and I was surprised it came back 329.

Ladybt28 - pray tell how did you get sorted, and how long did it take??

Wx

[christinedownsouth]

Hi getstuffedPeri...love your user name. I don't think I have particularly had mood swings but just seem to be constantly quietly worrying about my symptoms and spending too much time Googling medical conditions  I have always been a quiet worrier with no obvious outward signs of anxiety etc...

[Ladybt28]

Warwick01 - there is good news  and bad news on that front     

The good news first - it can be sorted and it did get sorted!    the bad news was the timescale - 6 types of hrt - nearly 3 years and when I found the right hrt for me a total of 7 months to get rid of pretty much everything!  Don't get me wrong I am not miraculously fixed because I wasn't in great shape before meno but at least I now have a life and am no longer a raving lunatic and behave and feel like a relatively normal human being for 99% of the time.

My story is lengthy and traumatic and all over this forum if you check out my posts under my name - but I am living proof there is hope.
My salvation (and it is by no means right for everyone) was 4 pumps of gel up untl recently, utrogestan vaginally on a long cycle and 3 pumps of testosterone a week.  After 18 months it seems my body said - now is the right level of oestrogen for your symptoms any more is too much so I am now on 2.5 but still on the rest of the regime.
I had to go through the agressive thing and when tried to drop to 2 pumps before now I could't my symptoms came back but now it appears my body has levelled out and can maintain the level so 2.5 is ok.  How I knew it was too high wasnt through testing cos my doctor doesnt do it but by symptoms.  My breast suddenly got sore and I started itching!  So I dropped by half a pump until it stopped at 2.5.

So like I said - good and bad news Warwick but plenty of hope! xx

[CLKD]

How on Earth does anyone determine whether it is "hormonal anxiety"  .  I have never in over 50 years of suffering with anxiety had anyone make a suggestion as to what the causation might be.  I know what the triggers are for me. 


Personally in your position I would rather try something like this than anti-depressants as these are not indicated for hormonal anxiety due to peri-menopause. Maybe worth thinking about?


Appropriate medication for appropriate symptoms?

[Perinowpost]

it's about knowing yourself CLKD.  I only ever had issues when hormone levels fluctuated:

After having a baby- when hormone levels plummeted

And, before my period when I got into my forties so was peri menopausal- once again hormones were fluctuating

Crucially, the rest of the time I was fine, that's how I knew it was hormonal issues x

[CLKD]

 

[warwick01]

Hi

For me I know there is a hormonal link. When I had my daughter 40 years ago I suffered extreme anxiety/depression, panic attacks etc. Suffered in silence because I was 18 years old and no family support, I thought my baby would be taken from me if I told anyone. Things improved after about 2/3 years. Then 10 years later when I married and went off the pill to try for a second baby, same symptoms returned and GP said I was having a breakdown. I knew that wasn't the cause because I was happy in my life with no stress. GP tried SSR antidepressants but they made me really ill. I also went back on the pill and things improved. (gold figure) 

Currently I am post menopause at 61 and although some symptoms have improved the anxiety/depression and panic attacks are crippling me.  GP thinks I need to come off my HRT but to be honest I wonder if I should increase from 2 pumps to 3 as my mental health is worrying me. Through choice I am becoming more isolated and fatigued.

Any advice please Wx