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[Angel1964]

Hi Ladies.  I do post quite often but I seriously need help now.  I suffer majorly with health anxiety and this all started back in March when my outer jugular appeared massively on the left side of neck. It was checked out and scanned and was told it's not heart related. Since then been hospital and doctors god know how many times with different symptoms., Always told anxiety.  But I don't believe it and can't get that out of my head. Anyway fast forward to now and partner had had enough and had finished with me - been together 8 years. Just before this I noticed my hands would go really hot and clammy and veins everywhere would distend massively and I felt nauseous and so unwell with it, stonach and lower ab pain (as the gold blood pressure was up) The night he finished with me BP was up to 200/118. Neighbour called 111 and they took me in an ambulance. Bloods were fine, listened to Heart and lungs, pressed belly and stomach all fine. Tokd them I was on lansoprazole since 17th and they said it can cause more pains and to come off it if I wanted. Went GP yesterday as she is concerned about BP and it was 140/90 one arm and other 140/100. He said it's better but still elevated and on the 7th I've got to have a 24 hour monitor. Also I have blood on stool everyday since I've started get hot and the veins really dilating. GP examined me said can't feel piles or any cuts as no blood. I have to be referred for an examination. So my health anxiety and moving out has topped me. I don't know what a breakdown feels like but I'm so so scared of how I feel and how surreal I feel. I have started citalopram and propanolol as I've resisted for months but can't do this anymore. What does a breakdown feel like? Is this all just anxiety?

[Angel1964]

You have an anxiety disorder. You sound like me. It's awful. Thank can't sleep and I am constantly anxious. Can you ask for some mental health support? I‘M seeing someone in two weeks who's apparently going to discuss my options to help with managing anxiety.
Do you have a supportive family or good friends?

I've got CBT 1-1 on 30th but anxiety that high I'm worried about going. It's like I'm on 24/7 high alert. Ally family are down South. I'm up North in Lancashire  it's worrying me this surreal feeling never had this before.

[CLKD]

Agree completely Birdy.  You have seen professionals who should have reassured you. 

If there is a tiny split in the back passage as a stool moves through to the toilet, it may show fresh blood.  Making sure that you remain well hydrated, eat lots of fruits and veg so that your stools are softer which will lessen the hardness causing a possible split.

I use Actimel to soften stools - 3 pots a day.  There are other tablets on the shelves, maybe have a chat with a Pharmacist.  The thing is not to take too may of the latter so that your bowels become runny! 

Do you breath correctly?  Singing means that the body has to breath properly, get that radio on loud and join in!  It will increase your oxygen levels and can be relaxing.  Shallow breathing immediately raises anxiety levels.

Your GP isn't helping.  85% of the public have white coat syndrome.  So when in the Surgery their BP goes up.  GPs know this and measurements should be taken on the SAME arm 3 times with gaps in between. Gaps of up to 20 mins. and then the average is made.  My husband is the calmest person you will meet in the World and he has WCS!!!

Did your GP suggest that you buy a home BP monitor?  Should have done.  We have one - I don't measure on it, according to the machine, I'm dead - well you can see daily that I am not.  DH uses it at the same time every morning B4 eating.  Makes a note of the measurements then lets our GP know every 3 months.  Job Done!  One cannot feel high blood pressure.  Low, yes.

Worrying isn't good for us.  Anxiety hits me suddenly.  Floors me within 10 mins. I'm curled into a ball  .  The body however, can get used to high levels of adrenaline which feeds itself. 

Do you have a companion that you can walk with daily?  Your OH may have his own problems and can't cope with extra stuff.  Everyone has a stress limit and it seems that he has reached his.  Let us know how you are as the day goes on. 

[Woodlands]

Hello there.
I was once in your situation with high level anxiety and In a loveless marriage.
Take the Citralopam and propananol it will help. I useto wrap myself in a snuggly blanket and pull it tight to stop myself shaking....... Honestly the professionals have checked you out... Listen to music to help relax, avoid all booze and caffeine...... Do you work? If so time off and see if you have a counselling or wellbeing service you can refer too..... Relate have a live on line chat too which helped me.
I stay on meds now to remain well..... If I can get through it I know with our listening support you can too.
Big hugs Woodlands....

[Angel1964]

Thank you Ladies. I have gone to a friend's as it's his boat we live on. I have been bad since Xmas Eve and it's got worse.  My main symptoms since then is firstly hands go extremely hot, all veins everywhere dilate, I feel even more shaky, throat constricts near where we gulp, keep coughing at this point,  and I feel ill and breathless and off balance. Heart gets racy. Legs go heavy.. get feeling in rectum like pressure. It does pass but then comes back all the time daily and quickly.  So it's not just due to us splitting up. Due to BP being so high GP has told me to instantly take my patch off.  Xx

[Conolly]

Hello Angel,

It sounds like anxiety, but we can't rule out any underlying conditions. You should take the meds and see what they can do for you. If it doesn't improve in one week you can go back to GP and beg for more tests. Red blood on stools that is not from piles or fissures may be from colon, colitis or Crohn's. It could be a side effect from Lanzoprazole, but I'm not aware of it.

Anxiety is a terrible disease that alter your brain functioning. The digestive system is our 'second brain', it contais around 500 million neurons that can go haywire with chronic anxiety and panic attacks.

Regarding the bulging veins, I've already said it might be related to low weight and low subcutaneous fat. Veins naturally contract and dilate but we're not aware of that because most of us don't see them. Some days I can see the veins bulging on my hands but other days I can't. It usually happens when I have been hanging them down or feeling hot. The blood doesn't return properly to the heart causing the bulging. I can't see it happening elsewhere because I'm a bit chubby right now (thanks to menopause) and this is obviously one of the first signs of aging.

You're thin, and I bet you're not eating well or absorbing enough nutrients thanks to anxiety. Again, insist with your GP for further testing if AD and BP meds don't help.

Conolly X

[CLKD]

You recognise your symptoms.  It won't help to be told that these are 'normal': fight or flight: knowing that doesn't ever help stop the anxiety from flooring me. 

Your palms are reacting to a sudden rush of anxiety.  When I get adrenaline it's like hot water going through my veins, scared the s..t out of me the first few times  until I realised that it was adrenaline surges.  Quite unpleasant.

Shakyingess is one of the symptoms.  Anxiety starts for me in my gut: I feel suddenly sick, then my thighs go weak, followed by my calves; then I have to sit down.  I find the emergency pill really helps.

........... breath.  Properly.  It helps to slow the anxiety levels.  My problem was that I couldn't practice 

Sit down on a comfy chair
Feet flat on the floor
Arms resting in the lap
Take a deep breath in through the nose - hold for the count of 5 [you won't initially]
Let out as slowing as possible through the mouth
Repeat and rest
Close eyes and focus on your eyelids - draw a picture there
Repeat deep breathing


Maybe keeping a diary will help: mood/symptoms/food : to chart progress.  This does pass but it can take a while.  In the 1990s I was unable to leave the house but with appropriate GP support, breathing correctly and medication I came through. 

[Conolly]

Hello CLKD,

I don't think keeping a diary at this point would be helpful. Giving her diagnosis of aorta regurgitation I think she is entitled to be referred to a cardiologist for further testing.

Conolly X

[CLKD]

It focuses the mind Conolly.  A suggestion that would be made by a psychologist or GP.  Gives a purpose to part of the day. 

It is up to Angel whether she takes up the options of what is suggested on here. 

[Conolly]

Of course, I'm sorry if I have upset you. Your suggestions are very welcome when it's chronic anxiety. I think her symptoms suggest something is wrong and it's getting worse, so it's better to be safe than sorry. If it is anxiety, reassurance from a cardiologist would be very helpful.

Conolly X

[Angel1964]

Of course, I'm sorry if I have upset you. Your suggestions are very welcome when it's chronic anxiety. I think her symptoms suggest something is wrong and it's getting worse, so it's better to be safe than sorry. If it is anxiety, reassurance from a cardiologist would be very helpful.

Conolly X

Hi Conolly I spoke to the GP again and she and others on here have said it's nothing to worry about as loads of people have it and without knowing. Xx

[CLKD]

It was checked out and scanned and was told it's not heart related

Why would Angel need a Cardiologist?  The aorta will be scanned regularly.  If the Medics thought it to be an immediate problem, it would be dealt with.  My FinL had his scanned every 6 months for years B4 opting for surgical intervention.  It is a condition that is more prevalent in men.

Hopefully the Propranolol [ why do they give medication such long names  ] will ease anxiety surges.  It has helped me.  I was given it in 2002 the idea being that the drug stops surges as it lowers the heart beat.  Initially given 80mg 3 times a day, after 6 weeks that was dropped to 40mg at night.  Now I take 20mg at night which helps a lot.  If I don't take dose my head feels muggy so I know that ti has some effect.

Citalopram may take a while to 'kick in' but should also be of benefit. 

Let us know how you get on Angel1964!  Do you feel more relaxed after your discussion with the GP? It's a bit like a heart murmur, many live with one but are unaware unless they have check ups for other conditions. 

[Conolly]

Hello Angel,

Have they given you any reason for the blood on stools and the bulging veins?

I hope they are right and this is just (did I  said 'just'?) anxiety.

Are you off the patch? This is good but it can give you another set of symptoms. Have you started taking the other meds?

Conolly X

[Angel1964]

CLKD it's aortic regurgitation. Is that the same as your partner? My whole aorta has never been scanned. My left outer jugular was scanned and no furring etc I'm getting more worried now thinking they are missing something xx

[CLKD]

It is not my partner.  My FinL had an aeortic aneurism [leak].  Common in men.  I doubt if 'they' are missing anything! That's you, worrying.  Over-thinking which is what anxiety does.  It heightens our reactions and worries, DH told me in the 1990s that I would find something to worry about if I didn't have anything  .  I was not impressed as I never have looked for issues  they seem to crop up.

Usually when I'm worried about other things.  Then even the simplest of issues becomes over-whelming to the point that I can't see how I'm going to get through the daily chores, even though I have a routine.  I find then that making a list so that I can tick off and see at the end of the day what I have actually achieved, really helps.  It's about putting coping mechanisms into place.

Do you have a Nurse Practitioner you could make an appt. with, it might be less rushed than going to a GP?  Let the medication prescribed do it's work too.  Feet up!