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[Katejo]

Not sure where to post this .
 .My 96 year old mother is dying at home and the family are caring for her . Since my menopause I'm quite emotional and tear up easily.I find now that my eyes fill up when talking to medical staff about my mother or if people are kind to me saying how sorry they are .....I feel so foolish....
I'm also worried that after she dies I'll meet different groups of friend during the week and they will all say kind things and how sorry they are ..and I'll just be crying all the time ..feeling embarrassed.
I know it's normal to show emotion at such a time but some people can be strong and accept the kind words without crying.I know Mum has had a good life and lived to a great age but still it's painful. Im crying writing this but feel I need some advice.

There is nothing wrong with showing emotion, particularly in the current situation. My Mum died fairly quickly when I was only 29 and I felt a craving for sympathy from others. Tears come to my eyes quite quickly anyway and sometimes take me by surprise. A year after her death I was thinking of her and mentioned it to my then manager. I was quite shocked by her response of "Surely you have got over it by now"! It was a 1st anniversary. I put it down to the fact that both her parents were still alive and well at the time. There are still certain triggers which bring tears to my eyes. One is the hymn "Make me a channel of your peace' which my Mum liked.

[Jennie]

Thank you for all your replies.....I have gained comfort and feel more settled somehow.Im glad I posted now but I felt silly at the time..a bit indulgent...Thanks xxxx

[CLKD]

Survival is selfish - which is why a baby cries, sometimes before it's born.  Indulgence is OK.  If we don't ask, we don't get