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[Tinkerbell]

I have seemed to have had a meltdown since decorating started re anxious about asbestos...I went to doctor yesterday who tried to reassure me that me and the children are at no risk, he wants to see me in two weeks and hasn't prescribed medication at moment.
I have no been like this before but he thinks five years of constant stress and the health scare last year ( chest related) with my teenage son has been the trigger.
I know I am being silly but I am so worried in case their are asbestos fibres and worried if I have vacuumed right way, I didn't change beds for several days as using washing machine was difficult as laundry room was the DIY project.
Everything is taking long as I put washing on extra rinse programmes, now anxious about cleaning hoover.
I also spoke to paramedic practitioner at our gp practice, who said I was overthinking and we were at no risk and to just change the bag but I have a Dyson!
Feel I am going mad and if I don't do things right we are all doomed.

Doctor wasn't particularly worried as he said although I was thinking irrationally my logical mind was coming through whilst talking to him.

[Snoooze]

Hi Tinkerbell,
I remember your post about your fear of the asbestos.
It's obvious that after all you have been through it has triggered some obsessive compulsive tendencies. I doubt you are the first person that this has happened to and you won't be the last and it all sounds completely normal because of everything that has happened. It is now your coping mechanism but your Dr sounds reassuring. You will probably be offered some CBT which will help you with the OCD.
When my daughter first started secondary school she developed OCD tendencies. It does run in our family unfortunately so I went to GP and they referred her for some counselling where the Psychologist said it is very common in children of that age and especially when they experience a big change like going from a small primary school to a huge secondary school. She was given coping mechanisms. One of  which is keep a diary. Write down when you have these fears then write if anything bad happened. Keep doing that then after a while each time you have the same fear look back in the diary and see that you had it before and nothing bad happened and all was OK.
My friend became like you when her young son had leukemia and then she was obsessed with cleaning everywhere and not letting any germs be near him but she was told that was the wrong thing to do and to not wrap him in cotton wool. You have been reassured that your family are not at risk so keep telling yourself that.
Also, maybe ease off on the cleaning and instead, take yourself out of the house and do over things to distract your mind.

[Tinkerbell]

Thank you for replying, I feel so alone with it, I will try and do what you suggest.
Just want the agitation to go, am going out for the day tomorrow, when I am out of the house it does help.
I just keep overthinking

[MIS71MUM]

Hi Tinkerbell.

I had/have OCD tendencies towards invisible germs, basically Dog Poo.
I went off the scale with it when my daughter first started walking.  Imagined she would go blind and catastrophised the whole thing.  I'd retrace our steps, check for poo, come back and dettol her shoes. It got very out of control and my husband couldn't understand why I'd spend hours thinking of anything shoe related.

I understand what you are going through and not been able to switch your thoughts off.  Could you write down your fears and feelings and keep them safe until you are ready to rationally think about them.

If it helps, my Dad used to work for our local council and visited many schools with a view to taking out asbestos and replacing it. He's still here and doing fab at 74!

[CLKD]

How much reassurance do you need?  You have spoken 2 professionals who have reassured you.  We have 'discussed' it here.

What's the worst that could happen?  Blue asbestos is the nasty one and it wasn't used in ceiling tiles/Artex.  If you are worried about your "Dyson" perhaps consider buying a 'sweeper' from a charity shop - I've had 2 recently; one for our upstairs and one for Mum's property; as well as a electric mop-thingy at very reasonably prices. 

[Dorothy]

Have you tried talking it through out loud?  It sounds odd, but it helped me!  I went through a phase where it took me hours to leave the house because I was paranoid about switching everything off in case there was a fire...and then I'd get to the front door and panic I'd forgotten something and have to go through the whole house again.  Then I tried this - I would stand in the middle of the room, pointing at all the things I was worried about in turn (light switches, sockets etc) and saying 'that is switched off, it is safe now'.  When I finished, I'd go out of the room, shut the door and say 'that room is now safe'.  Ok, so it took me a while to get out of the house, but not nearly as long as checking all the switches 25 times each!!!  I also found that when I did this, I was less likely to panic away from home and if I did, I could stop myself by reminding myself that I had checked everything.

So maybe in your case, stopping to watch the washing machine for a moment and saying 'the washing machine is cleaning thoroughly - I don't have to worry about what is on the material any more' or emptying the vacuum cleaner into the bin 'I am getting rid of this, I don't have to worry about it any more'.  Might be worth a try (only make sure no neighbours are listening in or they'll think you are potty - someone once saw the tail end of my house-leaving routine as I walked out the front door and I'll never forget the look of horror on their face     )

[Tinkerbell]

Thank you Dorothy, I have calmed down a bit but I am going to do what you suggested as I think that is brilliant advice, when my husband calmly reassures me it sticks in my head and I am better, but I was cross yesterday as he got a bit exasperated...really upset me as I have dealt with his MH issues in the past without showing my annoyance, although I did feel it at times!

No worries about neighbours, I think they think we are weird already

I have always had an issue with plugs too, think I picked that up from my dad as he always checked them.

[CLKD]

I think that people of the older generations did switch off 'at the wall'.  Many++ years ago FinL switched off the main cooker box - trouble was I had pre-set the over for our evening meal  , I knew the moment I stepped into the house, home from work.  We went out to eat and left the chicken cooking for the meal the following day.

When my hand washing takes over I make a list, did I say already  .  Ticked off reminds me that it's OK to wash at appropriate times 

[Dorothy]

I'm much, much better than I used to be, but I am not someone who can rush out of the house.  As long as I do things steadily and in order I'm usually ok (unless I'm under a lot of extra stress - e.g. bereavement, house moving) but if I rush I go back to panicking I haven't done something.  I think a lot of it is about slowing down, being present and being aware of our surroundings which is good for us all anyway, so maybe indirectly, our weird little habits will actually benefit us long term!

[CLKD]

I do so much on automatic pilot that I can't back track in my head