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[Mbrown001]

Has anyone else lost confidence in their driving.

I'm really not that happy behind the wheel these days. This has been going on for a good few years now. I've had a couple of frights and it's really knocked my confidence to the extent that I won't drive on motorways or really busy roads.
Country roads are fine as I feel safer. I know I can just pull over easily if I want.
I have felt a bit disconnected and floaty headed a good few times and really didn't feel that safe.
I have to really force myself these days and I don't want to give up completely.

I loved driving at one time and would happily drive hundreds of miles. Hubby and I used to drive to London regularly and that's 500 miles from us.

He now does the majority of the driving now and I feel a bit guilty especially when we go on holiday.

Has anyone else experienced this and if so have they found anything that has helped.


Mrs Brown

[MicheleMaBelle]

Hope I don't bump into you then! Yes I'm exactly the same, so much so that my son commented on it at the weekend saying I wasn't nearly as confident behind the wheel. I need to drive for my job too.
I thought I was just getting into the vibe down here- usually stuck behind a Suzuki " Swift" .Never has a car been so inappropriately named😀

[Mbrown001]

I feel right at home driving around my local area. It's full of old buddies doing 25mph   

It is a problem though as I like to feel independent.

Mrs Brown

[optisight]

Yes I had exactly that and as I need to use the motorway to get to work it was becoming a real issue! Last time we went down to London I had my eyes closed the whole time...I wasn't driving by the way

On the motorway I was gripping onto the steering wheel so tight an if I had to overtake I was terrified and used to get lightheaded to the point where I didn't feel safe to continue. It's panic and anxiety  I used to be a confident driver and never had any issues previously.

This was one of the main reasons I went to the GP and decided to go on HRT. I have to say I feel tonnes better than I did, almost immediately my commute became easier and I can now actually smile whilst driving and even sing along to the radio now!! HRT sorted it for me and I am not half as anxious as I was....did 70mph last week on the motorway, this was an achievement and significant sign I feel better ( obviously when it was safe and legal to do so )

[Elizabethrose]

I've lost confidence in my husband's driving, he is a complete and utter nut job! It's like he turns into Taz of Tazmania as soon as he gets behind the wheel now!!

I find I drive less and less now not having to do the wretched school run anymore. I prefer using the bus and tubes and tend to walk as much as I can. Hubby really enjoys driving, especially when he's playing with cars, so he automatically climbs behind the wheel when we start a journey.

I'm used to city driving which drives me nuts but I find motorway driving much more annoying. Lorries are totally unpredictable and the habit of so many drivers to indicate after they have pulled out drives me crazy!! You really have to have your wits about you. I've seen some horrendous things on motorways.

My night vision has deteriorated, probably because of the migraine but also because of the new fangled headlights: they totally blind me! Trouble is because I don't drink I always get stuck driving everyone home.

Interestingly though, used to city driving I'm much less comfortable on country roads. We spend a lot of time in Cornwall and the narrow almost single track roads with high hedgerows can freak me out. I drive really slowly along them always expecting a car to come crashing round the hidden bends. Hubby is normally yelling, 'for god's sake it's like living with a pensioner'. Rest assured he is suitably dealt with!!

My only advice is keep on driving. We have to push ourselves outside our comfort zones sometimes. I would worry that if I stop driving I'd never start again. I'm not too happy about driving abroad anymore and will make an excuse not to do so if I can, which is total madness. The Charles de Gaul roundabout is my idea of being in the depths of hell though I wouldn't think twice about Hyde Park Corner. Trying to negotiate on the wrong side of the road with about eight lanes of traffic and when the priority is to those coming on to the roundabout is just wrong!!  x

[MicheleMaBelle]

Elizabeth Rose- in my neck of the woods there are a significant number of " retirees" who tootle along at 5mph on the wrong side of the road. I'd rather drive in Vietnam ( and that's saying something) x

[dulciana]

I'm okay driving on our local city streets and on countryside roads.  For several years now, though, anxiety has stopped me from driving on dual carriageways and motorways, and even tiny bits of dual merging into single (we've got a couple nearby) give me the slight jim-jams.  It's when other traffic drives alongside me that sets my nerves on edge; fine if they're behind or in front of me.   

[Annie0710]

It's my eyesight thats lost me confidence in driving.  To keep my licence I have to wear prism glasses for double vision but my night vision is atrocious

[Taz2]

It is easy to lose confidence as we get older I think but, as far as driving is concerned, then it is definitely a case of the less you do the less you are able to do. The more often you drive outside of your comfort zone/home territory the more confident you will become. Losing the ability to drive well is a big fear of mine - the loss of independence must be horrible - so I drive as often as I can. I hate being a passenger so do tend to drive. I do find it harder to make quick decisions although my reactions do seem to still be good. I read somewhere that drivers over 60 (male and female) are slower at processing more than two things at once i.e. coming up to an unfamiliar junction, reading road signs being and being aware of other traffic all at the same time causes more problems than for younger drivers. I'll see if I can find it again.

We covered this topic here last year so it might be worth reading again to catch up on any good points made https://www.menopausematters.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,33004.0.html

Taz x

[Elizabethrose]

Well at least my response was consistent Taz!

[Taz2]

Was it? I haven't read it - that's a relief then 

The AA give advice here https://www.theaa.com/driving-advice/safety/older-drivers   It's so difficult to know what is meant by an "older driver". I always thought it was someone over fifty when I was in my twenties but now, of course, I think it's anyone over eighty!

Taz x 

[Ju Ju]

I've lost a bit of driving confidence since being ill and then my car was playing up. Now I have a new car, which we collected today and I haven't driven it yet. I'm letting DH have fun with it first. I hate driving new cars and it takes me a while to make friends with them. My kids are laughing at me!

My Dad is 92 next month and is very much aware his driving days are numbered. He's worried about coping without a car, as he gets very tired and can't walk far. Mum is disabled. I live an hours drive away, so not on hand. He has always loved driving. I'm worried too about what happens once the car goes.

[Mbrown001]

I love trying new cars and that hasn't changed. My son appears regularly with different cars and I always get a shot in them albeit just locally.
It's been the lightheaded feeling that totally freaks me out and that only happens on bypasses and motorways. I think it's all the other traffic whizzing past and the fact that I just can't stop.
When I've been on my own I've done some weird and wonderful detours just to keep away from busy roads.
I'm lucky that I live in a quiet part of the country but if I want to go to the nearest city then hubby needs to drive.
I have to say he has been really good and encouraging. We do have a quiet loop of bypass near us and I "practise " on that.
I'm not giving in or giving up but I'm a bit limited at the moment as to where I feel comfortable.
Give me a country lane any day which is a bit mad as motorways are much safer.
At least you don't meet a herd of cows on the motorway 

I'm not alone in this it would seem so although I wouldn't ever wish this on others I don't feel quite so feeble.

Mrs Brown

[babyjane]

concentration is a problem with me, and sensory overload when there is traffic and pedestrians coming from all angles!

[CLKD]

I don't drive as often as I ought as we go everywhere together.  Haven't driven the camper yet ..... haven't had the need.  Do drive the new car onto and off the drive when we are swapping vehicles.  I need to get out and about ......... the bit I hate is going down a slip-way onto a dual carriageway  ..........

I haven't driven at night for years++!  I do need my distance glasses on.