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[nearly50]

First proper post from me, really just wanting some advice from you ladies who are ahead of me, on whether I'm approaching the last phase of perimenopause.

To give some background, I'm 49 and have had various symptoms during the last 3 years. Muscle pains in right hand side of neck, hip and shoulder, anxiety, night sweats, hot flashes (only on right hand side), heavy periods closer together, the usual really. I can cope with pretty much everything as I know it won't last forever. The heavy periods are the worst to deal with and low ferritin lead to a variety of problems (fainting, feeling exhausted) which has now been sorted through iron supplements.

I skipped a period in March but they do tend to come at least every 3 weeks and last 10 days, though not every day is heavy. Sometimes they run into each other. In the past couple of months I've felt a change, and found that hair suddenly stopped growing on my legs. I had a tiny smudge of blood last week and have now gone 32 days since my last period.  I am really praying this means the end is in sight, as the heavy periods are having an impact on my life. I have to cancel plans on the heaviest days and live in fear of an accident.

Anyway, I really just want to ask what the signs are that it is the beginning of the end, or what other people's experience was? I know everyone's different but hopefully there are some common signs

[dahliagirl]

I spent ages looking at this because I came off the pill at 49, went on pop for 3 months, then had no bleeding for a further 2 months, then had bleeding appx every 3 weeks for 7-10days until I was 51.  I was desperate to find out where I was, after having symptoms on the pill for 4 years.

Then I tried systemic hrt for the aches and pains etc, (and VA - already on vagifem by then).  Every time I had a smaller period and thought it was tailing off, I got another bigger one.  With hrt I have a bleed every 28days, but it is more predictable.

In theory you should be in the 'late reproductive phase' but the papers that is based on could only find this pattern in a relatively small number of women.  The rest were as varied as the people.

I take vitD and omega 3 for the aches and they do help (but do not get rid of it totally  )

[Dancinggirl]

Hi and welcome to MM nearly 50
Nobody can tell you how long the peri stage will last.  Of course meno symptoms can get better but often get worse once the periods actually stop.  If the bleeds are an issue then having a Mirena fitted is often a good option as it will reduce bleeding and sometimes it will stop bleeds altogether and then when you need a bit of oestrogen to control flushes you simply add in some oestrogen as gel or patch.  Do read up all the info on this site to get clued up.
Keep posting  Dg x

[nearly50]

Thanks for the replies, I really don't want to get a Mirena fitted or to take any sort of medication but that might change with time. Not being a martyr but would just prefer to do things naturally. I feel that whenever I have medication of any kind, it brings on a whole lot of other problems.

Have been taking vitamin D for a year now, and that could well have helped the muscle pains.

Just got to learn to take things as they come I suppose, and accept that there will be no fanfare when it's time for my last period.

Forgot to mention that I have multiple fibroids, biggest is 6x4cm so I'm really hopeful that my periods stop soon as I believe that this should cause my fibroids to shrink.

[Dancinggirl]

The Mirena would shrink the fibroids.  Have they offered an ablation or to have the fibroids removed? 
Do bare in mind that 5 years of HRT can prevent osteoporosis and heart disease in the long term - oestrogen is wonderful stuff.  DG x

[nearly50]

No, told hysterectomy only option. Like I say, don't want to over medicalise, quite happy for let nature take its course so didn't push for any alternatives. Only found out about fibroids because of ultrasound to investigate stomach pain which has eased and was probably down to iron supplements Really just looking for advice on signs that last period is close, but understand we all take a slightly different path.

[Taz2]

Hi nearly50 - it is always difficult to determine whether you are near the end or not! I went nine months, twice, without a period and I really thought that I'd cracked it - almost at the magical "year without a period" but not quite! I had my FSH checked and was told by  my GP that I would never have another period only to go on to have quite regular ones again.

On the positive side the longer you hang on to your periods the better - many of us on here have found this - as it is often when your periods stop that other menopause symptoms kick in such as hot flushes, night sweats and vaginal dryness. Although periods are a nuisance it does tend to keep some of the other problems at bay. Although you want to manage things naturally if you do suffer from vaginal dryness and bladder problems then it is worth considering a topical oestrogen product such as Vagifem which is a tiny dose of oestrogen inserted into the vagina and it really does keep things much more comfy.

Of course you may well have a really good menopause with no real problems at all. Keep us informed!

Taz x 

[Elizabethrose]

Hi nearly 50, welcome to the forum.

I have been told it is impossible to accurately predict meno age as we are all totally different, often deviating from what is considered 'the norm'. As Taz said, things can wind right down and then start up again. For some women they can even start menstruating again after they've done a year without periods when they'd thought they'd finally got there.

I was told I would probably be through meno in a couple of years over 10 years ago (by very well considered specialists who'd done lots of testing and analysis of cycle patterns and symptoms etc), but I'm still hanging on in, though it has to be said I am most definitely not the norm. The 'usual' pattern with peri is that in the early stages the cycle length shortens and then begins to become more erratic, often with short cycles interspersed with longer ones. Then periods are missed. However, as I said, this is the norm, there are millions of women who could give you a different description of their experience.

I know how frustrating the 'unknown' is, especially if peri is difficult symptom wise, and for you the heavy bleeding must be problematic. You may find it reassuring to 'speak' with other late stage peri women on this forum and if so check out Machair's thread below.

All good wishes to you.

http://www.menopausematters.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,31902.0.html

[nearly50]

Thanks so much for the replies, I really appreciate it. Had quite bad nightsweats last night which for me usually kick in a week or two before a period, and then the day before so will just have to accept there's no clear path. I like a plan so I find this frustrating!

Over the past few weeks my biggest issue has been with classic anxiety dreams which make me up throughout the night. I have never dreamed this much in my life! It has really been since I started taking calcium supplements - probably a coincidence but has anyone had anything similar?

Thanks for the link to that thread Elizabethrose, I will have a good read through.

[Dancinggirl]

Vivid dreams are definitely part of the menopause - many of us find these distressing.  It's amazing how the meno messes with the brain. DG x

[Hurdity]

Hi nearly50

  (if I haven't done so already!).

Just to add to what's already been said that if you want to read the scientific paper about the stages of menopause and how they have been categorised you can do so here in a paper called "Stages of Reproductive Ageing". http://www.imsociety.org/downloads/email_downloads/2012_02_16_1773491/straw10.pdf

As already stated you will see from the description starting on page 4 and table on page 5 the shorter cycles you experienced are typical of the late reproductive stage and now you have begun to skip periods you will be entering the early peri-menopausal transition. Whilst this is a general model describing the typical pattern as the others have said not every woman will follow the same pattern and in particular the length of time it all takes. However you could have 3 + years to go before your last period.

On this basis I would suggest you are nowhere near late peri at all - but will have a lot in common with many of the women who have just started skipping periods or who are experiencing hot flushes and worsening pms as they end their fertile years.

I agree with Taz though - you are still young and once your periods stop and oestrogen has lowered - it's gone forever unless you take HRT so yes, enjoy the highs while they last - but I can understand if you are worried about the bleeding due to fibroids and the bleeding.

I was different from this model in that I had shorter cycle (24 days) from when I had regular periods until I had my first child at 32 and then they became normal length and stayed that way until I started missing them!

re the dreams - well I am in my 60's and on HRT and still have very vivid dreams - I woke my husband last night with a nightmare about being bitten by very fast moving ticks (I had a tick bite a few weeks ago!) 

Hurdity x

[Dorothy]

If only there were a way to tell!  I'm on the pill now so no idea what my periods would be doing naturally, but I have still had a lot of symptoms...BUT I hardly had any for the past two months, and was thinking maybe it was all over for me...and then woke up yesterday morning feeling really sick and all the symptoms came flocking back during the day and are still here...just hope I'm not starting from the beginning all over again...

[nearly50]

Hurdity, thanks for that link. I'd read it ages ago and it is good to see I'm a bit further on than I was - a good reminder that this won't go on forever

[Dorothy]

Nausea in the mornings was one of my first symptoms (before I realised what I was going through) so it really does feel like I've gone back to square one after 6 years.  Got the aching joints and tingling hands and feet too, which again were early symptoms. 

[nearly50]

That's a shame - I had morning nausea early on, combined with enhanced smell (only of horrible things). Hope it is just a one off, shows you erratic everything can be