'As one of our newer members said, to be told that someone uses HRT to protect against X Y and Z is as good as saying if you don't use it then this will happen to you. Very scary for a new and unsure member.'
^ this
not just for a new and unsure member as I have been swayed a couple of times by very strongly worded posts advocating HRT. Anyway I am glad to see this thread has remained calm, balanced and helpful without being turned into a pro HRT debate.
You're right. I think this thread has also shown me there's a third camp - the 'I take HRT even though I am not totally comfortable about it and never thought I would, but my quality of life was so badly affected that I had no option'. I think, if I am honest, that's where I fall. As a result, looking back, I think I can get defensive when I worry people are implying that I have somehow given in or been weak. When you get to the point you can't walk without crutches, or wear normal under wear (fluid retention) or feel your feet (numbness/tingling) or think straight/work competently through brain fog, you really have no choice. You have no pleasure in life and no hope. Yet, even now, a part of me feels like I have 'given in' by taking additional hormones. Certain posts on this forum reinforce this, as do friends/family. They are as unhelpful as some of the 'too strongly advocating HRT' ones, in terms of how they affect others. Does anyone else know what I mean?
One thing this thread has made me wonder is if there should be a separate thread for younger members. I say this in an objective, non ageist way: when you're at an age when your body 'expects' to still be having ample estrogen, the risks of not having it are proven. The general treatments on offer are slightly different too. Sometimes I can innocently make a comment, trying to be helpful, but later realise what I am saying (eg about protecting my heart) is more pertinent to younger members in their 20s, 30s and early 40s. It could be scary to those members in a different situation, who have to weigh up the proven risks of HRT verses the benefits. (Risks are greater the older you get). There is also the additional grief of never being a mother which I know affects some younger members.
I know there are websites especially for younger people, but I am so fond of the people on here and value their opinions, support and girl-humour far too much to log in anywhere else!! X