Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Joyce]

Don't know if any of you watched Billy Connolly's documentary recently about death & funerals. Costs in some parts of America are unbelievable! Cardboard box will do me, no point in setting fire to expensive piece of oak.

[Taz2]

I'm being buried - well they'd better bury me - that's my only request!

Taz x 

[Scampi]

I want burying in unconsecrated ground.  And there's one specific song I want played if they choose to have music.  Other than that, those making the arrangements can do what they want!

[honeybun]

The thing is they can do as they want as we are not here to see it. Guess that's one of the reasons I'm not bothered.

Why burial over cremation. Has anyone got a specific reason for that. Again I just want the cheap and easy option and also I can't see my kids tending a grave for years to come.


Honeyb
x

[Taz2]

I just like the idea of being buried - must go with my love of dark winter days    I hate the fact that we scatter people's ashes around - the idea of flakes of dead people blowing around or floating past me when I go for a paddle makes me feel a bit odd.

Taz x

[honeybun]

Never really thought of it like that to be honest.

My mother talks a lot about death. I had to ask her not to do it in front of the kids when they were a bit younger. I guess the older you get the more it becomes a reality but she borders on obsessive sometimes. I think that's one of the reasons I dislike talking about it.


Honeyb
x

[annieb]

Cost for my father in laws funeral was £3000 (give or take) that included the plot in the cemetery (dug extra deep so 2 more coffins will fit in it!!! - we didn't ask for this but plots in this particular cemetery are few so they always to this!! OH space it booked at no extra cost  ) , undertaker fees and the wake. Reckon it depends on where you live as to how expensive it is. He had an insurance policy that covered it all so we did not have to worry about that. Hubby went to a funeral a few years ago where his cousin had left his body to science. So there was just a church service and the wake. He say it was so much better as there was not coffin (body) and it was less upsetting.  I had always wanted to be cremated (fear of being buried alive  ) but having recently been to a crematorium have now decided that medial science can have me. Crems are truly awful and much like a conveyor belt with one lot of mourners going out the back way while the next lot com in the front.
Sounds like I go to a lot of funerals doesn't it but these experiences are over a number of years!! Our family is so spread around the world that it seems like the only time we get together is for funerals

[Dancinggirl]

It's not that easy to just donate your body to science.  You have to fill in forms in advance and someone has to notify them when you die. Also, your body is only of use if you die 'in good nick'!! There are certain centres that take bodies so it's worth doing some research. I thought there would always be a need of bodies for students to dissect as well - maybe they don't do this anymore.  My Dad was a dentist and like doctors they have to spend the first year doing anatomy - back then they only had tramps or vagrants available - bodies were scarce!! 
My hubby and I thought it would be easy to donate but when we did our wills last year the solicitor had to apply for the forms etc.  I'm sure you can do it for yourself but do make sure it's in your will and the executors know about this because of the notification.
I know this thread seems rather gruesome but I think it's important to discuss these things.
I personally think it is not necessarily about the way we want our bodies disposed of but about how those left behind want to say goodbye.  We think the body isn't important. DG x

[Taz2]

There's lots of information here about how to go about donating your body, brain, tissues etc. http://www.hta.gov.uk/bodyorganandtissuedonation/howtodonateyourbody.cfm

Taz x

[Dancinggirl]

Thanks TAZ - I knew there had to be info online.  DG xxx

[Taz2]

I remembered my friend talking about it when they set it up.

Taz x 

[Scampi]

My preference for burial over cremation is biological/ecological.  The natural way of things is for us to assimilate (sp?) atoms and molecules into ourselves throughout our lives, just like every other living organism.  When organisms die, they decompose and their 'substance' returns to the ground to be recycled and used again.  I prefer to think that is what will happen to my body - they way it should, than for it to be incinerated and most of the useful stuff be turned into something useless (or even damaging).  The burial ground I have in mind uses natural fibre shrouds and 'coffins' so that decomposition can happen naturally, and has no 'proper' grave markers - trees are planted instead, so the area becomes a woodland over time.  No graves for family to feel they should tend.

[Greyhoundgal]

I'm not sure how I feel about the whole thing but having had to sort out Mum's earlier this year does make you sit back and take stock a bit.  We were lucky with her in that she had enough money for us to pay for it without having to put money in ourselves and the vicar didn't charge anything for the church or his services as Mum had been such an active member of the parish.  We chose a wicker coffin as she was being cremated and she'd been talking about dying for the last 6 months and had helpfully left us notes of what she wanted, hymns to be sung and even a letter for the vicar to read out at the service. 

[CLKD]

We have no family.  It costs for others to keep the plot in good order.

I don't want to take up space so cremation for us.  No record other than the Death Cert. to remind anyone that we were here 

One can apply for a body to be buried in your garden so long as the ground is so many yards from a water course.  Makes selling the property harder perhaps?  So bottom of the compost for us 

[Dancinggirl]

scampi - I like the idea of your option. To be part of a tree is a very nice thought. DG x