I had a sudden flash back recently about the night prior to my first every surgical procedure. I wasn't scared, more resigned, the surgery was after all, my choice.
After that and several more I became quite blasé
…….. I was worried more about after surgery vomiting and whether or not my pain levels would be controlled. I wasn't and they were
Take that list on the 2nd. Don't analyse your feelings. Until you get there you will swing from yep or not likely! These feelings are normal. I have sat by many patients as they prepare for surgery so you are not any different. The depth of your surgical intervention must not be dismissed. You trust your Surgeon? which is a whole part of recovery. He may not find the problems you are expecting once he is 'in'
…….. and he has your interests at heart.
Depression can be eased with medication. Talking therapy. Relaxation tapes. Fear of the unknown cannot be dismissed either! and will add to anxiety levels rising and falling.
Put your Mum's problems into the hands of the others. Tell your Sister that this is an important time for you, I am sure she already knows that but often people don't vocalise - they think that others know what they are thinking
……. Now is the time when your sister will find out how much more support your Mum will require. Your sister is a big girl and can liaise with those people necessary.
It is your Mum's choice that she stays in bed - do you have evidence of this? Is it something she tells you ………. staying in bed is OK she probably sleeps, I'm sure she doesn't lay there thinking 'I'm all alone etc. etc. etc.' ' …….. so what, this is *your* time. Your Mum's problems are 'not your chicken, not your farm'
……..
Try to do relaxation therapy several times a day. Put the focus onto you. 10 mins. every hour, sit, ponder, relax ……. your recovery will be easier if you begin therapy now.