Mags I know what you mean about your son in law, it increases the already heightened anxiety as they are not such a 'safe' person if you know what I mean. At the end of the day we always have the choice to say to anyone I have had enough please leave now, it would never happen but you have that as back up. Are you coming downstairs more in the day & evening now? Is your appetite getting gradually better?
I feel so ashamed of myself today. My daughter is doing a school art day tomorrow & needed some Autumn leaves, she is at a school friends house until 7pm tonight so thought I would have a wander down the bottom of the back garden to pick a few up. I haven't been in the garden since the beginning of September. We are so lucky we have the most lovely long garden but then we have a little slope & we have even more which is the really special bit & you feel like you are somewhere else it is magical. Imagine I could be living somewhere & the lift was broken & have no one to help me & horrible neighbours. There was also the most gorgeous young tabby cat on the other side of the stream climbing a tree so I couldn't get to it but had a chat. I think my cat fate is now sealed. It was a bit of a defining moment like when you see a picture of yourself & go on a diet or whatever. How can someone who loves the outdoors, gardening, nature etc not even have had a wander down there in ages? Big learning curve today. I think the sertraline is really kicking in now. As soon as I got back inside I had a call from a previous client who wants a dog mating on 8th Dec & I said yes not no! I haven't worked since early August & have turned down so much work.
Sorry to waffle on, I know you are a few sertraline weeks behind me but I have to give it credit now. I still couldn't do what you did last week with the hairdressers though. I think that says a lot that you went out somewhere where you can't really back out of (lopsided hair!) plus you wanted to look nice too which is something when you feel down you don't really care about no matter how fastidious you where previously.
Hope you have had a good evening & lets see what tomorrow brings. xx