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[Maggies]

Hi Lovely

Just to say hang on in there......this journey of Menopause has many roller coasters for us and seek comfort if not in your family then friends, they can be such a tonic and if female understand exactly where we are at the time.

Sending hugs...catch them

Lyn

[JJ]

Mags, not been on the forum for a couple of days, just wanted to say you are sounding a lot better . Keep going xxxx

[mags]

Thanks JJ-how are you?  Love Magsxx

[Dyan]

Mags- sounds like you're having a breakthrough.
Well done to you!

Bev- yes I suppose it did feel like that but very mild.
Today I would say I'm back to my old self 100%.
I felt this way yesterday afternoon too ,so onwards and upwards - fingers crossed.
Pups ok?

[mags]

Hi Bev- how are you today?  Love Magsxx

[bev567901]

Hi Mags, been for my blood test this am (took them forever my arms look like I am an addict.) Loosing a couple of hrs to do that has seen me rushing around very busy catching up. Been up since 4.30am as mummy dog wanted a wee, think I will get her a potty!!
How has your day been? Hope it was good. xxxx

[JJ]

Mags, I'm good at mo, been really busy Xmas shopping, when I'm having a blip I find it helpful to rate my days on a scale of 1-10, 10 being really good and the last five have been a 9. I've been on anti deps  over 2 years now ( since my peri began)and I still have ups and downs, at the mo I feel like my body trying to have a period so maybe that's why I'm feeling good. Just remember the anti depressants won't cure you but if anxiety and depression your worst feature during meno they will help lift you a little and this will enable you to move forward. X

[mags]

Hi Bev- at least you have got the blood test out of the way- I know how stressful they can be- you did well to get there     I had my CBT yest and the therapist was very pleased with my progress  and said she could see a big difference  in me- I still don't feel anywhere near right and know it's going to take time- I told her this and she said  that she wouldn't expect that from me yet.   I still have lots of anxiety and dread and lowness and with Christmas coming up I am worrying about how I will cope     daft I know- that's a lot of my problem though-racing mind and over  worrying.   On bad days I still struggle to get up etc.
Hope  you have a more restful day and hope  you weren't up all night again with the dog- Love Magsxx

[bev567901]

Morning Mags, Didn't realise you had CBT on a Wednesday again this week. I think people do see improvement in you first so don't worry. I know what you mean about the negative thoughts, I do think these will lessen as the sertraline kicks in even more & then you will be doing more & hopefully any negative thoughts will just be sent away as you will be more yourself again.  I am not looking forward to Christmas either BUT I did feel a bit more open to it this morning all of a sudden. I won't be able to do much because of the pups & shall just tell people so. I wouldn't take on anything that you can't cope with, just be honest with people & they will understand & if they don't they are not worth worrying about. It is a stressy time but you will be fine,  we have a month nearly to get ourselves sorted.  Hope today is good for you.   Mummy got me up at 5am zzzzzzzzz  You are growing & are the pick of the litter, no faults at all so far that I can see. Lets hope you aren't naughty xx

[mags]

Hi JJ- Glad you are feeling so much better and thanks for the advice- this meno thing is so horrible isn't it   Love Magsxx

[mags]

Hi Bev- my appts do change a bit as the therapist is very busy at the mo- I'm back to Thurs again next week.   As for Christmas -you are right we have a bit of time yet to get sorted. I am going to keep it very low key and just have close family here on Christmas day- if I am not well they will understand- like on my birthday, I didn't feel great but managed to get downstairs at teatime- my eldest daughter , little grandson and the boys  came round and they know what I am like.  I just feel a little more uncomfortable if my son in law comes - he is lovely but  I would feel more  worried about having a meltdown in front of him than my own close family .   Glad to hear I am the pick of the litter and doing well-I will try to behave-honest!   Hope you manage to get some rest today-Love Magsxx

[CLKD]

NOTE TO SELF: do not forget to take medication at night or I will feel whoozy in the morning  .  Fell asleep and didn't take my evening 'concogtion' ................

[bev567901]

Mags I know what you mean about your son in law, it increases the already heightened anxiety as they are not such a 'safe' person if you know what I mean. At the end of the day we always have the choice to say to anyone I have had enough please leave now, it would never happen but you have that as back up. Are you coming downstairs more in the day & evening now? Is your appetite getting gradually better?

I feel so ashamed of myself today. My daughter is doing a school art day tomorrow & needed some Autumn leaves, she is at a school friends house until 7pm tonight so thought I would have a wander down the bottom of the back garden to pick a few up. I haven't been in the garden since the beginning of September. We are so lucky we have the most lovely long garden but then we have a little slope & we have even more which is the really special bit & you feel like you are somewhere else it is magical. Imagine I could be living somewhere & the lift was broken & have no one to help me & horrible neighbours. There was also the most gorgeous young tabby cat on the other side of the stream climbing a tree so I couldn't get to it but had a chat. I think my cat fate is now sealed. It was a bit of a defining moment like when you see a picture of yourself & go on a diet or whatever. How can someone who loves the outdoors, gardening, nature etc not even have had a wander down there in ages?  Big learning curve today. I think the sertraline is really kicking in now. As soon as I got back inside I had a call from a previous client who wants a dog mating on 8th Dec & I said yes not no! I haven't worked since early August & have turned down so much work.

Sorry to waffle on, I know you are a few sertraline weeks behind me but I have to give it credit now. I still couldn't do what you did last week with the hairdressers though. I think that says a lot that you went out somewhere where you can't really back out of (lopsided hair!) plus you wanted to look nice too which is something when you feel down you don't really care about no matter how fastidious you where previously.
Hope you have had a good evening & lets see what tomorrow brings. xx

[CLKD]

Bev.: little steps  let the medication do the work.  Take time to smell the autumnal air ......... I pause often now.  Having spent 3 months incarcarated due to anxiety every time I step outside the door I try to note something lovely 

[bev567901]

Thank you CLKD what was wonderful was next doors apple tree which is really old & never produces anything attractive had spilled a few apples over & for the first time they where huge, round & georgeous. A little pile of loveliness for the wildlife. Its the little things  xx