Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[eliza jane]

 Hi
I have not posted for a long time. apologies for that. I hope all the ladies who have answered my posts in the last three years, are doing well!!an update on me. I finished university on may 2nd, and some credit for this must go to the forum women. some of you shared your experience of doing a degree whilst in the menopause and prior to the meno and that was helpful and encouraging. It looks like I am on course for  a 2:1 which is a double bonus. My girlfriend left me three weeks prior to handing in my dissertation and I have to say that my degree carried me through.
one of the reasons I am posting now is because of the overall body ache that I have been feeling since the degree was over. I made the mistake of trying to be all things to all people when the degree was over because I felt guilty for having locked myself away for three years away from friends. Instead of going on holiday straight away , I ran three or four trips into London a week aswell as trying to do my part time job. Today I was on my way to work but decided to take the day off due to feeling unwell. I know this has been brought on by over committing to things outside of work. I am trying to stop being my own worst enemy. How silly of me to think that my friends would be annoyed with me if they knew uni was over and I failed to available to them instantly. I am 48, now and this kind of behaviour has to stop. My body is telling me it has to stop. I am baby sitting for a friends baby next week and I am going to have to tell her that she needs to put the baby to bed before I come due to the fact that I cannot lift him. My hands and arms ache especially after heavy lifting. It may seem strange but I feel ashamed admitting these things to people as I feel they wont believe me.But I just need to be brave and explain to friends. Its my body and I need to look after it.
On another note, I am due to move away from the room I have been staying in to go back to my flat. I have outgrown this small room and am in need of my own place again. So I am deciding whether to move back to the area my flat is in and rent another room or give the tenants two months notice and move back home. So I am praying that I make the best decision for me.
have a nice weekend and I look forward to hearing from some of you.
x
eliza

[Joyce]

Well done! A 2:1 is no mean feat and takes a lot of work. Your hard work has paid off! Sorry to hear your girlfriend has left you recently. The combination of your hard work & being left heartbroken will both be catching up with you. Aching isn't uncommon during meno.
As for moving, only you will know where your heart lies.

[eliza jane]

 hi Cuba girl
  Nice to hear back from you so quickly. Yes I am going to listen to my heart. perhaps if i stand still enough i will be able to hear its beating.
x
eliza

[Taz2]

The heart speaks with a very quiet voice.

Taz x

[CLKD]

  a 2:1 is a good achievement.

Finding love that lasts can be difficult.  You know the journey you have been on with this girl friend and perhaps the reasons 'why' it didn't work.  One needs to grieve then decide whether our partners are a joy or a drain ;-).

What would you gain by going 'back home'?  Like you I felt not ashamed but un-easy at telling others of my panic attacks, nausea when in crowded situations etc. as I felt they would watch me all the while.  So I kept it hidden.  DH and I have a pat phrase when menas I need to leave a situation.  Now I am older  and am less reliant on others for my emotional health, I tell those who need to know, when they need to know.  Otherwise I tootle along .........

Little steps.   

[Greyhoundgal]

Wow, it seems like forever ago that we started this journey with you.  Congratulations on finishing your degree - huge admiration for any mature students who can do that along with everything else life throws at them.  Sorry to hear about your girlfriend, give yourself time to grieve over that before rushing into anything else.  As for the aching, I think it's part to do with the meno and part to do with finally being done with uni, it must be a huge change for you now.  Take some time to think about what you really want, where you want to go and start making small steps to achieve them. 

[Evenstar]

Well done you on your degree. So wish I could do something like that, but I know I'd never stick to it.
Sounds as if you need a long well deserved rest now x