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[honeybun]

My mother is having a bit of a meltdown. My sister is potentially going to have a new knee cap. She has a bit of an unusual case of arthritis and doesn't need a complete new knee but potentially a knee cap.
All mother can think of ....is what is going to happen to her.....if I have to talk much more about my sisters knee I think I may explode.

Now if it was me I could see her problem as I'm the one that does the practical stuff. My sis does the shopping and paperwork and takes my mother out on a Saturday.

Oh well, I guess I know my place 


Honeybun
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[CLKD]

Honeybun: You know that your Mum needs more carers to go in then …….. if put into place before your Sis needs the Hospital and convalescent time she will be used to the change of routine  : why wait 

[honeybun]

Are you coming to Scotland any time soon CLKD....you can tell her cause she doesn't listen to me.


 


Honeybun
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[CLKD]

   ……    I can't wait ……….. 

[honeybun]

I can absolutely guarantee you would meet your match CLKD. 

She listens to no one.


Honeybun
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[bramble]

It is fairly obvious HB that you cannot take on any more. It sounds as though your sister will have a fairly long recuperation so you will need some help to cover the days your sister normally does. It does look as though your mother will just have to lump it regardless...........
Bramble

[honeybun]

My mother has got way ahead of herself. My sis has been referred from one consultant to another and a decision has still to be made. It  might not even happen.

Your right bramble, my mother will not be neglected if it does happen but she will also have to learn the world does not revolve around her as I can't do any more than I already do.

Guess she is a bit scared of change which is understandable at her age.


Honeybun
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[Taz2]

Honeybun - feel so sorry that you have this extra worry but need to say that if your mum does have the early stages of vascular dementia - and it does sound like that from your posts - then she will be unable to realise that the world doesn't revolve around her. I really do think you need to get the GP on board over this so that things are already down on her notes if you need to consider residential care for her. If you wait and then the assessments etc. have to be made then the whole process takes quite a long time.

Taz x 

[honeybun]

I agree Taz, only trouble is my sister doesn't and says it's unnecessary. That's me shot out the water as .....and this sounds really petty....My opinions don't count. It's always been the same, I'm the younger daughter that's fine for the donkey work but not much else   

Also my mother has always been under the impression that the world does revolve around her so there is no change there.


Honeyb
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[groundhog]

I really really sympathise HB.  You know the problems I am having but even though I have all the authorities on board they don't consider her anywhere near bad enough for residential care.  Despite the fact that at 7pm last night the carer rings to say she is in garden in the rain looking for my father ( died 15 years ago).  The day the social worker came out she was fine.  The day she spent 9 hours in a&e the doctor wrote in his letter how well and bright she was despite it being 1 am.  I realise symptoms can be intermittent but it's so frustrating.  She too think the world revolves around her - she has no empathy for us - I think this is probably the illness though.  Different person in my mothers body

It's flaming hard

[CLKD]

The carer rang who exactly Groundhog  - they should be ringing social services or your Mum's GP  .

Honeybun - you are prepared as to what will need to happen if push comes to shove  …. if your sister isn't in agreement now she will be when she's had surgery ! and you will be ready with your retort won't you - I'll send you some so that you can  practice saying them 

[Ju Ju]

My Mum had an endoscopy today, to see how her ulcers were healing. (She was not expected to survive a few months ago.) They have completely healed! She's still frail, but so much better.

[purplenanny]

Great news JuJu, very happy for you and your mum
PN x x

[honeybun]

Great news....our oldies are made of tough stuff.


Honeyb
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[CLKD]

That is such good news!  Bet your Mum is pleased too.