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45 and pretty lost

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Maruuna:
Hello everyone,

first of, I'm really glad I found this forum as honestly speaking, I am bit lost and frustrated concerning menopause and all things coming with it.

As for me, I'm 45, and until about 6 months ago, I had a super puctual natural cycle (I never took the pill, or well, I tried it for a few months when I was 23 but my  body didn't tolerate it very well). I also never had any other problems, 28-32 day cycle, normal to rather lighter bleeding, never any cramps, nothing.
I am slim and sporty, I don't smoke or drink, and I am altogether rather healthy. I don't even get colds when everyone around me is sniffling and coughing, I think the last time I had a cold was about 5 years ago.
So, that was that, until spring this year. So, suddenly my cycle went irregular. It was around 50 days nothing, then bleeding but with lots of mucous pieces in it. (do other women experience that too? My gyn said nothing to worry about (and my last checkup and ultrasound very totally fine) but it still irritates me seeing all these partly huge pieces...
Anyways, the next cycle was only 18 days...the one after normal with around 30, then again tow rather long ones over 45 days.
I know that's a normal sign of menopause but it came so sudden and with it (and that's my main problem) every month a new other symptom that comes and goes.

I don't even know where to start, one month it's tense breasts for 14 days, the next it's feeling constipated for no diet reason for two weeks, then it's suddenly gone again, then it's extreme mood swings with deep sadness or out of the blue anger. Then it's joint pains, then they are gone again. I also had slight nausea in every cycle for the first five days of the new cycle for no apparent reason. I was annoyed by all this but I could cope, also with the fact that my migraines ( I've been a heavy migrains sufferer since my late teens and it runs in the family... I mean severe migrain with attacks triggered by too much light on my eyes, which can cause stroke-like symptoms like half the head or tongue being paralysed apart from extreme head aches)  tend to come more often again compared to the past 20 years where I had it in check quite well and was down to maybe one rather light attack in 2 months, - now it's every month for 5-6 days and more severe again.

But last month yet another symptom appeared and again out of the blue. Of course I read about vaginal dryness but is it normal this happens so suddenly, like from one day to the other when I never had any issues in that direction? Since November I have a steady feeling of uncomfort, and it's not itching, it's more like a steady soft burning and it's rather on the outside than on the inside.  (nothing so actually see outside nowhere, no redness, no obvious dry skin, nothing) And, it's not just located in the front, that strange outside burning sensation goes from the front to the whole back if you know what I mean? Everything back and front feels like burning and dry and uncomfortable. Is that normal? Is it normal that it is not just the vaginal area but the rest too? (and also in the back, it's just the outside skin, no problems passing stool, no bleeding, no piles or anything, everything looks normal too).

And also this is not consistent, it's there for two weeks in a row really bothering me all day through, or in the gym especially. Then it's completey gone again for a week or even two, then it returns from one day to the other. Does anyone have any tips for me concerning this?
I have tried vaginal gels for moisture and they sooth it a little, also washing with only lukewarm water or just a special wahing gel for menopausal issues. It won't go away.
I guess I don't have to add that my libido has been down the drain too for  the past months and now as everything down there feels so uncomfortable and sore I can't even think of anything like a touch, let alone more.

I have another appointment with my gyn in January but would be grateful for some tips or just hearing that this all falls under 'normal' for menopausal symptoms.

Well so, that's me and what to know about me, I'd be glad to hear of others and their experiences - meanwhile, have a great evening wherever you are =)

CLKD:
Hormones  ::)  :welcomemm:

As oestrogen waxes and wanes [the change], we can experience all kinds of symptoms. 

Firstly, get some vaginal atrophy treatment ASAP - if possible B4 C.mas/New Year.  U don't require blood tests or an exam., mayB ring the surgery to speak to the Nurse Practitioner.  Hopefully your GP will be au fait with atrophy!  Also, gynaecologists aren't always up2date with peri menopause, so checking his/her credentials on line to see if he/she has an interest in womens health.  Trawling on here with ideas to discuss at your next appt., as well as keeping a mood/food/syptom diary to chart progress may also be useful.


There are dedicated menopause clinics which have waiting lists, either private or NHS. 

I had constipation in the week leading up to periods.  Also, 10 mins B4 a bleed began, even if a period wasn't due, I would get 'the runs'  :o and have to dash!  Throughout my menstruating years I had heavy, clotty, painful periods: 10 days bleed, 10 days off.  I would move and clots would drop  >:(.  Sometimes I had to wear two pads in the day and sleep on a thick towel in the night.

Also the nausea - yep!  Troublesome especially as cycles became up and down.  I would know where every bin was situated in all the shops I used regularly.  A bin in the car and one by the bed!

Some ladies find that 'sylc' or 'yes' moisturisers ease symptoms around vulva/vagina, I get on OK with KY Jelly.  AVOID replens.

sheila99:
Welcome to the roller-coaster  :(. I hate to say it but it's all pretty normal.   A diary of symptoms and time if month can be useful and show any cyclical variations. Agree with the need for VA treatment, it will only get worse without it. Perhaps consider hrt too and discuss it at your appointment?

Maruuna:
Hi CLKD,

thank you for the swift reply, and let me say I feel for you in retrospective hearing your symptoms were partly more severe than mine (struggling with mine a lot already).
I will go and check if I find specialists concerning the matter. Yet I have just found a new gym who has rather good reviews and recommendations but it's always a reality check thing going for the first appointment.

Hi Sheila99,

thanks for the warm welcome and comforting words! I will definitely discuss every option at my next appointment. I don't know that much yet about HRT yet, but I am a little hesitant concerning taking any hormones. When I was about 23 a gyn back then convinced me to take a mini pill... it totally whacked everything for me for the 5 months I had taken it. I had very heavy bleedings, panic attacks I never had before, the migraines went through the roof and and I had symptoms of a blood clot in my leg after four months... I had to go off it and everything went back to normal. Also my ped warned me because of the very fast blood clot symptoms and my migraines. As they are so heavy a have a higher risk of strokes anyway so I am a bit afraid of anything hormones as my body really didn't tolerate it at all back then Oo But I will speak with my gyn about it in January and hear the options

CLKD:
Hi!  It was normal for me, Mum told me that a GP would suggest "Having a baby will solve your problems" ........ 'Feminax' was the drug which really eased those monthly pains.

I was advised by the National Association for Pre-menstrual Syndrome [NAPS] advised me to eat every 3 hours to help keep blood sugar levels even .... that's every 3 hours 24/7.  Took some getting used to  ::) but I tend to stick with the regime at times of stress.

I think that you need to make sure that your Gynae is aware of all your medical history and that he/she is menopause savvy.  Apparently - though our Surgery is keeping it quiet  ::) - one of our GPs has trained with Dr Newson regarding treatment women with appropriate menopause treaemtns . 

Let us know how you get on.  Local vaginal atrophy treatment is less invasive than other forms of 'replacement'.  It's designed to replace the oestrogen lost in the vulval area and plump up the tissues = less dry which eases itchiness.  There are also many ways of delivering HRT which will bypass some conditions and can be prescribed with women who have migraines. 

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