Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Other Health Discussion => Topic started by: Nas on March 11, 2025, 01:52:37 PM
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As the title says.
Feeling “ meh”
My hair is falling out due to chemo. My head hurts. Not working at present and I’ve still got 5 treatments ahead! Great!
Oh and I’m craving oestrogen!
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You absolutely wallow away Nas. You deserve it.
Is that 5 chemo treatments to come??? :o that must be very hard.
Did you decide to try and anti depressant???
Much love. Xx
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I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.
I have no advice to offer but hope the side effects of your treatment pass as quickly as possible and that it is effective.
I have so much admiration for those living with secondary breast cancer and was a huge fan of the late Kris Hallenga.
Stay strong and be kind to yourself.
Personally I don't think antidepressants are particularly helpful when the psychological distress results from having a physical illness which has done a number on your quality of life - feeling sadness, grief, fear, anger etc isn't a mental illness in that situation, it's a normal human response to suffering.
However they may have some mileage in relieving hot flushes, and I don't know if nausea and vomiting is an issue for you with chemo, but I had this in the first weeks and months after my brain injury and found mirtazapine extremely helpful where all human licenced antiemetics had failed.
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You absolutely wallow away Nas. You deserve it.
Is that 5 chemo treatments to come??? :o that must be very hard.
Did you decide to try and anti depressant???
Much love. Xx
Yes, 5 chemo treatments to come..
I decided against any anti depressants Crispy, I just feel that there is enough toxic crap entering my body right now.
x
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I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.
I have no advice to offer but hope the side effects of your treatment pass as quickly as possible and that it is effective.
I have so much admiration for those living with secondary breast cancer and was a huge fan of the late Kris Hallenga.
Stay strong and be kind to yourself.
Personally I don't think antidepressants are particularly helpful when the psychological distress results from having a physical illness which has done a number on your quality of life - feeling sadness, grief, fear, anger etc isn't a mental illness in that situation, it's a normal human response to suffering.
However they may have some mileage in relieving hot flushes, and I don't know if nausea and vomiting is an issue for you with chemo, but I had this in the first weeks and months after my brain injury and found mirtazapine extremely helpful where all human licenced antiemetics had failed.
Thanks bomb
This chemo is for a brand new cancer, not the secondary breast (which is stable).
I am craving oestrogen, probably in the same way that a drug addict craves drugs.
Nausea is a side effect for the first few days; not such a problem right now.
The unfairness is unreal.
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Oh Nas, no, not again & after all you've been through already. I'm so sorry. :hug:
Not on here much these days but I often think of you, always with admiration for your resilience.
I hear you on wanting to avoid more drug treatments, but also second Bombsh3ll's suggestion of Mirtazapine if Oncology think this might help. It has antihistamine effects at low dose (7.5mg) so could be helpful as an antiemetic & it's a good sedative if sleep is difficult.
Sending all good wishes.
W x
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Hello Nas
I am so sorry that you are suffering.
A few years ago a friend had oesophageal cancer and faced six weekly sessions of chemotherapy. She found it hard to cope and wanted to stop however her team explained that continuous treatment was necessary and she would be faced with a further six sessions whenever she restarted. This convinced her to push on through and she completed the course. She is alive and well now and her rough time is a distant memory.
I hope you manage to complete the treatment and please keep us posted so that we can support you. I know from my friend's experience that it is a hard row to hoe.
Wishing you well and sending hugs.
K.
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Awww Nas, I'm so sorry. I had no idea it was a different cancer you were referring too.
So so utterly unfair. >:(
But. You're a very strong woman! You've done this before. You've got this. You'll have your therapy then move back to a place of stability. Then...and probably only then, you'll be able to look at options to improve your quality of life moving forward :-*
So, I am going to try the mirtazapine shortly. I highly doubt I'll get on with it - story of my life. ;D. I know you did a month before. So, if I miraculously get past that point and find things get better - I'll let you know.
Hugs xxx
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Hi nas. It must be such a bloody challenge for you to keep going through all this. It must feel like it's never ending. It's hard to offer advice as it's you who has to get up and face each round of chemo and that must be so hard. Just try and stay strong and that you WILL get some quality of life back. Sending you love and hugs xxxx and thinking of you.
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So sorry to hear this nas, hope all goes well :foryou: x
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Thanks all.
Just feeling sorry for myself right now. Not working has really been the last straw because it was the one thing which kept me going. Now all i see is a long road ahead, full of stupid appointments, needles, canulas, poison and bad news! No sooner have I got rid of one problem, another surfaces!!
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You have every right to feel sorry for yourself! It must seem so daunting to face all these interventions, even though you know it's all to help you. You just want your normal life back and to feel well and good in yourself. All you can do is plod on. Also, giving up work gives you more time to worry as you say. Keep us posted as you go on. Sending love and all good things. X. Maybe doughnuts might help! X
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I am sorry to hear that you are dealing with a separate cancer diagnosis, that is beyond cruel. I wish you peace and comfort as you go through your treatment.
And I know work is another loss, another little piece of your identity - I grieved the loss of my career bitterly and still do, and I hope you manage to either go back one day or find something else meaningful.
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Thanks bomb, you have hit the nail on the head. You are right
it’s a grieving process. Bit by bit, my identity is diminishing. At some point, one needs to take back control. How and when, I’ve no idea.
Suzy, doughnuts certainly do help! 😊
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Hi Nas, I know that I can't possibly understand what you are going through. But just to say I'm thinking of you and fingers all crossed that all goes well for you and sending big hugs to you. You've always been a very calming help for me when needed....much appreciated as I've said before :hug: Take care of yourself xx
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I'm another with no useful advice but lots of sympathy :hug:. I know it doesn't replace work but would a couple of hours of charity work give you something else to focus on? Take care and I hope things get better for you.
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Hair coming out in clumps 😭
Never did I think I would have to face this trauma again! Once was bad enough. Twice.. well I must have done something bad in a former life!
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It sounds drastic but have you thought about getting the hair clippers out and taking it all off?
A friend did this and she said it helped her by making her feel in control of one aspect rather than having it forced on her.
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It sounds drastic but have you thought about getting the hair clippers out and taking it all off?
A friend did this and she said it helped her by making her feel in control of one aspect rather than having it forced on her.
Yes, I’m going to do this. It’s one thing I can do to take back some control.
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Look after yourself and put yourself first for a change. :foryou:
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Take care nas. X
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Hair coming out in clumps 😭
Never did I think I would have to face this trauma again! Once was bad enough. Twice.. well I must have done something bad in a former life!
Please don't say that Nas....you've not done anything bad in a former life or this life.
I'm sorry you are going through this again but please don't blame yourself.
We are all here for you anytime you want to offload all those emotions.
Get those clippers out girl !!!!!
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Awww Nas xxx :-*
I'm sure you'll rock your new clippered (is that even a word?) look.
It must be so damn awful. Hugs :-*
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Lovely Nas,
Such testing stormy seas you are still having to navigate. It’s so tough to even hear the diagnosis let alone find the resources and energy to face the endless testing and prodding and scans, interventions and treatment and a second time around. Then to face the internal questioning ‘why has it happened?’ I'm saying that in relation to your past life message:) For what it's worth, i think give up on the why’s if you have them, when you can:) it can be an endless road of questioning with cancer as in most cases nobody fully really knows.
It’s hard to feel like you are losing your identity but Nas is still in there. Even when the outside things that anchor have to be put to one side for a bit. I only know a fraction of you from the forum and messages but that in itself is enough for me to know that you are a great spirit.
Keep hold of that in the mire of it and do as you do and keep pushing forward when you can. There will be brighter days although at times it must feel like that’s an impossibility, but there will be. It's wonderfully good natured to say you are only just 'bloody fed up' with all that you are going through :) Sending lots of love to you. xx
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Thinking of you Nas, I know how awful the chemo is after watching my OH last year go through it.
Try and stay strong, we’re all with you in spirit. :foryou:
xx
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Thanks all :)
Headshave tomorrow :-\
Mentally exhausted just thinking of it, but needs must.
Chemo 2 on Wednesday.
Summer.. No more questions starting “ why” as there is no answer I understand. The sea is stormy and I’m feeling sea sick. Is there a God? Will I make it? No idea. Pray God they find a vein and pray God there are some jam doughnuts left for me and some greedy consultant doesn’t take the last bag!
xxxx
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Hi again. I know you have helped many on this forum and the kindness and wisdom you have shown to me in our messages, has helped me through so much. And as you say, all the why questions can never be answered. It must be a tough call to go through the head shave, loads of courage needed. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to this life sometimes , but I hope you can find yet more of that inner strength that will get you through again, and life WILL be good again. Xxx
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Thank you suzy.. you are very kind. Here we go again eh? X
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Awww Nas :hug:, I am so sorry to hear you are having to deal with all of this s**t again. Whilst you are not working take good care of and look after YOU for once and try not to worry about anything else. Stay strong and don't give up hope even on your darkest days, you will beat this s**t again Nas. A lady I know who is also going through chemo got a voucher from the nhs for a wig, is that something you might consider or enquire about, honestly, I bumped in to her last week and her hair was lovely, looked perfect actually and looked like as if she had just had it done and that's when she told me about it, that nhs had gave her a voucher and her own hairdresser had cut the wig in to a lovely style which was very similar to what she had before and I think she may also have had a few highlights through it, it certainly looked like she had, she also said that other people had commented on how lovely it was as well. Stay strong Mrs and take good care of and look after yourself. I am sending some positive thoughts and big hugs your way and lots of love, you can do this again, you really can, we are all behind you xxx :foryou:
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Nas, I'm so sorry to hear you are having a difficult time. The hair loss must be traumatic but the important thing is, it will grow back. I would definitely go for a wig because I think it will make you feel more you and give you confidence. Wigs are so good these days it's impossible to know who is wearing one and who isn't.
Wishing you the very best and please keep us updated.
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Thankyou all.
The hair is off!!
Tomorrow I will have a couple of wigs styled and they will be worn as and when I feel like it. They are the same length and colour as my original hair ( was!). But my what a shock! When I had primary BC and the hair went, I literally couldn’t look in a mirror.
Yesterday I marched straight into M&S for my I doughnuts! 🍩 and faced the mirrors.
This morning I’m thinking “ s**t” who am I?? :o
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Just plod on nas, another difficult step to recovery. Really brave to go out and face mirrors. Hope the wigs help when it all gets too hard to face. X.
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You've got a great attitude that will get you through this, Nas. Bloody difficult but keep up that sense of humour, it will help X
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Forget the doughnuts; the scales say I’ve gained few pounds
( thought I was shrinking my clothes in the tumble!) ;D
Well, have saved myself a huge amount of time in the shower this am ( just as well, we are on a water meter!) Found an eye pencil, drew some brows and lashes ( kind of!) and am now going to cut down a dead tree trunk.
Happy Sunday all 🌼🍩 x
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:D
This sounds spot on Nas!
Can I say - forget the scales and E joy the donuts for the time being. :-*
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Embrace the positives. :)
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Embrace the positives. :)
Indeed. Although they are fairly small ones right now ::)
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:D
This sounds spot on Nas!
Can I say - forget the scales and E joy the donuts for the time being. :-*
There could be a national shortage of doughnuts very soon! ;D
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Good on you Nas - as a fellow wig wearer (alopecia since teens) I hope you find some joy and lightness in exploring alternative hair.
You don't have to stick to what you had either - when I first started wearing wigs I went for the same colour and texture as I'd had naturally, but didn't really like it and later upgraded to the type of hair I'd always wanted.
They have also come on a lot over the years and no longer look like roadkill - I am open about the fact I wear wigs but nobody ever seems to notice unless I tell them. Even a dermatology nurse started to examine my "scalp" once ;D
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Ah bomb.. just the person then! :)
If I may ask, what type of wigs do you wear? Synthetic, human hair, hand tied, lace front, wefted?
I have worn a wig before with the first lot of chemo many years ago. It was very heavy as I recall. The wig I have chosen, is quite similar to my own hair colour and style, but wow, it would be pretty exciting to choose something off the beaten track!
Roadkill ;D Yes, my partners sister has alopeica and the wigs she wears, well it would take a LOT to move them!
If you have any wig info to share, I will be forever grateful ( and you can of course share my doughnuts if you wish ;))
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Thinking of you for tomorrow Nas with next chemo round. xx
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You are in my thoughts today x