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[Sooby]

Recently I was writing a presentation on limiting beliefs and what holds us back.

Most of us have grown up with ideas and expectations that we never challenge or break away from but many of us do reach a point in life when we discover something that liberates us and makes us see life differently and opens us up to getting more from ourselves and our relationships with others.

A valuable lesson that I learnt as a young person was that what we accomplish at school or how we are judged by teachers is not an accurate reflection of who we are or an indication of what we can achieve. It's probably fair to say that this ethos  underpins all my teaching and development work.

If you could share one thing that you have learnt in your life that might have held you back but now may benefit others, what would it be?

[rebel2]

Try and see yourself through the eyes of others.  If, like me, you suffer from low self-esteem, it can be an eye opener.   Most people see me as confident and self-assured - it's all a front!

[dazned]

I used to view everything very " black and white " in my youth ,now I have learnt that there are grey areas and indeed a huge spectrum of colours. There's always various routes to achieve your goals and more than one way to skin a cat,as they say.  Indeed by stepping off my previous narrow path a whole new world has opened up to me.😇

[Sooby]

Thanks Rebel,


                      guess we all have a public face and a private one. 

I think that black and white view is very common in youth Dazned, the more we learn the more we learn that there is lots that we dont know. lol

[Butterfly22]

Learn to say no without worrying how others feel, I worry to much and over the last few years I put myself first and if others have a problem that's up to them.
I've had to put myself first with all my health problems, if I have to cancel something people who no me will understand.
I do lack confidence which I'm still working on but I'm getting better, I even went on a confidence course the doctor sent me on.
I also learnt to be kind and never judge as you never no what someone else is going through xx

[Ju Ju]

The most important thing I was told and have taken on board is that my worth and value in this world is a given, as is yours! Nothing to prove.

But I have learnt so many other things, but you said just one! I just wish I knew what I know now when I was little! I was never the child my Mum told me I was. But it's never too late late to access happiness within ourselves. Oh dear here I go......one thing....sorry...60, health challenges, but I'm happier than I have ever been.

[Sooby]

Oh Ju!

    dont hold back on your wisdom. Yes I said "one thing" but I lied. 

     knock yourself out girl and tell us all you know.lol

[Annie0710]

Better to try and fail, than to never try at all

[Sooby]

Lil

   I'm right behind you with the not judging. 

  I hope you found the confidence course helpful. Negative comments made about us as children can be hard to shake off.

[Sooby]

Thats a good one Annie,

   but fear of failure can be very disabling. What's your top tips to keep trying?

[Annie0710]

A couple of things I've witnessed/seen in my real life and social media lately are :

Don't judge unless you've walked in that person's shoes

Confidence is an asset, but arrogance is, well, just ugly

[Annie0710]

Thats a good one Annie,

   but fear of failure can be very disabling. What's your top tips to keep trying?

Quiet belief in what you want, or an interest in what you want to do I guess x

[dazned]

Annie0710 great point,there's been a lot on social media recently ,especially about depression and people not realising , " they look fine to me " ,if you've never been there don't presume to know .

[Sooby]

Something that I discovered in my 20's was that some people just dont have empathy for others. Some have sympathy and try to relate others experiences to their own which is nice of them but really not the same thing.

I couldn't understand why I was compassionate, tolerant, accepting and supportive of others but they did not offer me the same in return. One day I realised that the reason was not that they were not withholding all those things from me when I needed them most. They just did't have it to give. It didn't stop me being me but it stopped me expecting others to be like me. I no longer felt let down or hurt by them, I just learnt to seek out the company of those like me for the empathy and accept those without empathy for who they were.

Like you Analee, I found it very liberating!

[dulciana]

Something I discovered in my late forties was that you don't have to be 20-something to succeed in life.  What you do need is belief in yourself and a burning desire to succeed.  In 2008 and in 2014 (by then aged 55), I achieved basic and then professional-level qualifications in what had started as a related sideline in the 1980's.