Menopause Matters Forum

Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: Bette on November 05, 2010, 04:12:59 PM

Title: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on November 05, 2010, 04:12:59 PM
Here's the exercise my hynotherapist taught me last year to help me with anxiety and panic attacks. Think it's a NLP exercise as she was also qualified in that.I found it very helpful although haven't needed to use it for a while. Bear with me as will be a bit long-winded to explain.

You're going to be using 3 senses - sight (peripheral vision), hearing and touch. You can say it aloud but I always found doing it silently worked. It gets better with practice but it's the "doing" of it that's important not being good at it. If you lose the thread at any point, just start again.

Sit or lie comfortably and fix your gaze on a certain object. Start by noticing what you can see in your peripheral vision.

Here's an example of what you might say to yourself:-

I can see -

My tea mug on the table
The computer keyboard
A book

I can hear -

The hum of the computer
The wind in the trees
A car engine

I can feel -

My left forearm resting on the table
My bottom on the chair
My right big toe touching the inside of my slipper

I can see -

A picture on the wall
The wardrobe

I can hear -

The radio downstairs
The dog snoring

I can feel -

My left thigh pressing into the table
My tongue touching tne inside of my lower teeth

I can see -

The headphones on the desk

I can hear -

My breathing

I can feel -

My left thumb touching my index finger.


That's it! It takes a lot of concentration which is probably why it works. I find it gets harder to find the words as you go on - it's like your brain (and breathing) slow down and I suppose that's why it's relaxing. I used to do it lying in bed sometimes or even in the car (as a passenger!) Because my house is very quiet, I sometimes had to repeat the same sounds but that's not a problem. The "feel" one is fascinating as you're not moving and have to notice tiny sensations. My hypno said one of her clients used to go to the loos at work and do it if she was struggling.

Hope it helps - please give it a go. Even sitting here thinking about it and typing this out, I can feel myself "slowing down.

Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: allysonone on November 05, 2010, 04:16:19 PM
just read this thread and it sounds good. Will give it a try
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Rosalie on November 05, 2010, 04:17:31 PM
Thanks Bixby  :)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: deni on November 05, 2010, 07:56:59 PM
Thats a good statergy and will give it a go when I next feel the jitters/panic.

Thank you for sharing this with us Bixby

Deni  :thankyou:
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on November 05, 2010, 10:31:42 PM
You're welcome. I'd suggest you try it before you feel you "need" it, then you'll feel you know how when you really want it, if you know what I mean!  ;)
Bixby x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: maureenh on November 06, 2010, 06:59:40 PM
Bixby I tried this morning, at the time I was not having an anxiety attach, but afterwards I felt at ease, calm. The touch part was hard until I thought about it, it not just what my hands are touching but any part of my body. Do you repeat it 3 times?
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: JackyO on November 06, 2010, 08:25:50 PM
Bixby

This sounds interesting not only for anxiety but for trying to regain concentration levels generally - my mind seems to have turned into some kind of butterfly and I end the day with 101 jobs half done and knickers in a knot.  It would be great to concentrate calmly and achieve one job properly in a day.

J


Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Joyce on November 06, 2010, 10:17:35 PM
I should have read that before my fireworks last night!   ;)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on November 07, 2010, 09:09:24 AM
It really is amazing how well it works.
Bambi - I find the touch bit hard too - that's why it's so good, I think. You have to concentrate very hard so you really can't think about anything else and by the time you've finished, the anxiety has lessened. You just do the exercise once but can do it again if you're still feeling anxious.
Bixby x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Witches Cat on November 07, 2010, 02:21:12 PM
Thanks for putting this up Bixby, I'm gonna try it later today, and then like you say having tested it out, I can do it when I need to and I should know what I'm doing (no promises there though).. :thankyou:
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on November 07, 2010, 03:11:49 PM
You're welcome! Let us know how you get on.
Bixby x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: ariadne on November 07, 2010, 08:36:59 PM
Damn! I'd forgotten about this 3-2-1 tip and I meant to try it out today. I hate travelling by car at night and we went to Hunstanton today to visit friends. I wanted to leave before dark but hubby wouldn't, so I knew I was going to spend 2 very anxious hours in the car.

I liked the sound of this 3-2-1 tip when I read it and I think it could work for me.

I'll definitely be trying it out for myself soon.

Thanks Bixby
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on November 08, 2010, 09:11:03 AM
Thanks mucca - I've never been able to stop my mind wandering when trying that sort of relaxation exercise which is probably why the 3-2-1 works better for me. Hope it helps you too.
Bixby x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Eddie on November 08, 2010, 09:13:28 AM
I tried this at bedtime and fell asleep, thankfully i was in my bed, with my eyes tight shut.  ;D ;D I also use the alphabet, 5 places with a, b etc, or girls names, boys names. I used to use the one that Mucca said. They all work great for me, i've never used them for anxiety though, so will def do that next time. Eddie. x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Witches Cat on November 08, 2010, 01:38:42 PM
Hey Bixby, I did the 3-2-1 exercise when I went to bed last night, it really relaxed me and I had such a good night's sleep, even the torrential rain didn't rouse me too much on the window right overhead (although the cat crept into bed in the middle of the night, so it must have worried him) Shall deffo keep this going, thanks again....

                                                                                 :cat48:
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on November 08, 2010, 01:43:20 PM
That's great - I am SO pleased!  :congrats:
Bixby x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Lucky Stone on November 13, 2010, 04:28:27 PM
I've just had a 'go' at this and it IS calming. Thank you Bixby!!  :) Not feeling anxious at the moment but will try and remember to have a go at it when I am next ....
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: bev couzens on January 30, 2011, 07:55:42 AM
 :(,,i,m just going to try this,i will let you know how i get on with it..its going to take me a while to get the hang of it.i,m very confused,how can it be hard just to be awake..
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: bev couzens on January 30, 2011, 08:19:05 AM
well i,m tryin to do this ,but i keep get it the wrong way round..and its right in front of me on the computer screen..,but maybe its working already,cos i,m laughing to my self that i cant do it.Oh silly me,,i,m going to try  again...xxx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on January 30, 2011, 09:40:39 AM
As I said on your other thread, Bev, it doesn't matter how you do it - I think it's the process of trying that helps somehow. I suppose you're so busy trying to do it that it distracts you from the anxiety. Laughing is good!  ;D
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on February 10, 2011, 04:09:18 PM
Bump  ;)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: lornad on February 10, 2011, 06:51:48 PM
bixby that excersise i actually got from you tube in the guided medetation bit and it did work for me it was called the quiet mind found it helpful xx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: coffee mate on February 10, 2011, 07:00:50 PM
PLEASE, PLEASE, tell me how to do the 3-2-1 exercise
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on February 10, 2011, 07:24:05 PM
It's at the beginning on this thread, CM.  ;)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: lornad on February 10, 2011, 07:35:49 PM
try www.youtube guided meditation and its called the quiet mind its the same excersise
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: bev couzens on February 13, 2011, 03:05:43 PM
I now do them when i go out (not out loud) i,m finding it hard to get out my front door at the moment..they do help,,but the anxiety seems to be taking over me..i,v never been a nervse person  untill now,,BEV
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: lornad on February 13, 2011, 04:32:29 PM
im always  nervous feel it now its awful xx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Stella_al on February 14, 2011, 06:55:56 PM
Thankyou so much for that.

Hubby really suffers from anxiety and have tried sooo many things.

Will pass it on  :-*
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on June 22, 2011, 04:14:30 PM
Bump

Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: mucca55 on June 22, 2011, 08:10:44 PM
Keep bumping this Bette it's a big help.  :)

Reading through reminded me of Bev - hope that she is ok - i kind of liked her and she seems to have gone.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: harem77 on June 22, 2011, 08:30:21 PM
Yes i wondered where Bev has gone. Hope she is wellxx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on June 30, 2011, 07:32:51 PM
Bump - as requested!  :)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on July 16, 2011, 08:29:56 AM
Bump.
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on August 03, 2011, 09:56:13 PM
Ditto!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on August 17, 2011, 10:02:02 PM
 ;)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on September 03, 2011, 07:19:44 AM
September bump!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on September 20, 2011, 06:55:36 AM
Seeing it's been mentioned on another thread.....
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on October 23, 2011, 08:35:58 AM
Ditto!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: coffee mate on October 23, 2011, 08:44:51 AM
Morning Bette hope you are feeling a little better?
I'm not surprised to see that you are still thinking of others by bumping up this thread, thank you.  ;) 

cm xx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: catweazle on October 24, 2011, 06:24:19 AM
I love this 3-2-1 anti anxiety thing, it's brilliant! I use it whenever I get the heebee jeebies.
The great thing is no-one else need know you're doing it so you can appear nice and calm on the outside when you're feeling really wobbly on the inside!

Thanks Bette  :great:

Catweazle x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on November 13, 2011, 12:29:42 PM
For all Newbies who may have not seen it or for any "Oldies" who might have missed it - or forgotten about it!  ;D
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on December 02, 2011, 09:29:29 PM
December bump!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on December 24, 2011, 09:24:21 PM
Bump - a little early but maybe we will need this considering the time of year!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: bev couzens on December 25, 2011, 07:02:02 AM
The 321 anti- anxiety exercise,help me so much,i,v been doing them off and on all year,at least i dont have do them when i,m out side any more,xxMERRY XMAS everyone.xxx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Anjia on December 27, 2011, 10:28:37 AM
Hi Bette I find this exercise amazing its helped me loads thankyou !
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Hurdity on December 27, 2011, 08:40:51 PM
I just wanted to say I've adapted this to help getting to sleep and it's amazing!
I don't suffer from anxiety as such but do worry about things and always lie in bed mulling over things and trying to work things out or plan things, adrenalin going round, thinking about things that have happened, working etc, and it usually takes me ages to get to sleep.
I read about this so thought I would have a go and never get past the first time cos it really sends me off! Unbelievable!

I just do:

I can hear
I can see ( but I can't because my eyes are closed so I just imagine what I can see - usually connected to the sound)
I can feel.

I just think of one sound or feeling at a time and then concentrate on it for a while.

What's funny about it, is that there are so few sounds as I live in a village in the country that is absolutely silent at night past about 11.15 - unless there is any wind -  so usually all I can hear is me or my husband's breathing, or the odd gurgle (insides  ;D!) -  but it still works so thanks  :)


Hurdity x  :)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: luckydragon172 on December 28, 2011, 12:59:09 PM
thank you ,sounds so simple will give it a try.....x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on January 19, 2012, 08:58:44 AM
Bump!  ;)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: spider on January 19, 2012, 01:31:31 PM
Brill!! :clapping:
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on February 12, 2012, 09:41:30 AM
Bump for Feb  :)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on March 06, 2012, 05:51:29 PM
Ditto March.  ;)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on April 16, 2012, 05:48:10 PM
April already!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on May 21, 2012, 07:59:27 AM
May is here!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: JJ on May 21, 2012, 09:11:28 AM
How time flies !
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on June 06, 2012, 03:06:22 PM
June!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: purplenanny on June 06, 2012, 03:35:23 PM
Thanks Bette! x x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: JJ on June 06, 2012, 07:13:07 PM
Perhaps you should patent this bette.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: purplenanny on June 07, 2012, 11:24:45 AM
Wow! it worked! I had trouble with the 'I can see bit', as my eyes were closed, but I did a lot of 'hear' and 'feel' and actually went to sleep! No Zoplicone taken.

I slept from 12 - 4 and then the damn crows woke me up with their squawking. They are nesting in the trees outside my window. I might try closing the window tonight, but then I will probably feel too stuffy!

Really pleased I did it naturally though and I did not feel so drugged this morning - thanks Bette!

Purplenanny x x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Hurdity on June 07, 2012, 11:49:23 AM
Great news purplenanny!
For the see I just imagine what I can see - and often i connect it to the sound so i hear the sound then visualise what is making the sound ( trees in the wind or snoring husabnd....! etc
Hurdity x)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: purplenanny on June 07, 2012, 12:00:13 PM
Thanks Hurdity, I will try that tonight. Thankfully I do not have to put up with snoring husband - he sleeps next door!

Purplenanny x x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: bumblebee on June 07, 2012, 12:08:54 PM
Thanks Bixby. I'll try it.

Cheers
Bumblebee
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: purplenanny on June 07, 2012, 12:16:31 PM
Oops! just realised what I have typed!! 

 Just to clarify - hubby sleeps in another bedroom next to mine and not with the neighbours as it may have sounded!

Purplenanny x x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on July 10, 2012, 02:28:35 PM
July!  8)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: CLKD on July 10, 2012, 02:48:30 PM
Is it like "I packed my bag"  :-\
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on July 10, 2012, 03:37:49 PM
Sorry, CLKD but I don't understand the question?  ???
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: CLKD on July 10, 2012, 04:32:07 PM
Is the idea to focus on one thing, then the next: or does one 'pack it into' an area of the brain for storage?  to recall it later? not being very clear am I  ::)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on July 10, 2012, 04:40:18 PM
I think that the process of doing it distracts the mind - because you have to concentrate so hard to actually do it, you can't think about your anxiety or the causes of it and so it passes. Make sense?
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: CLKD on July 10, 2012, 04:41:17 PM
It makes sense in a way but my anxiety is so physical.  In the gut, churning, rolling .......... I will try it though .........  ;)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on July 10, 2012, 04:42:30 PM
I know what you mean about it being physical, CLKD but I really found that this helped by breaking the cycle. Good luck!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: CLKD on July 10, 2012, 04:44:16 PM
Thanks!  321 makes me think of Dusty Bin  ::)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: JJ on July 10, 2012, 04:47:12 PM
CLKD I can only really consider anxiety to be physical . For me it's physical sensations, and I suppose we are all different in which part of our bodies we feel it most.

When ladies post, you give good advice, and you often remind us to eat regularly which is correct as it stabalizes blood sugar.  Are you able to nibble on something, say every half an hour, I know how hard it is when tummy turns into churny one. X
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: CLKD on July 10, 2012, 08:43:04 PM
Thanks JJ - it is impossilbe to munch when my gut churns but I've had a rubbish food day: chocolate fingers, dried grapes, beans on toast, more dried grapes ? raisens ? ........... a packet of frosties, travel packet not extra large - eaten dry. 
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: JJ on July 10, 2012, 10:23:29 PM
Crickey, that sounds good to me, when I'm feeling anxious I just dip bread stick in houmous and nibble it every half hour. Not long till hubby back x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: CLKD on July 11, 2012, 08:32:03 AM
Bread sticks are useful to munch on too but I would need to go into the shop for that.  Started looking round the bedroom for items , found the TV, followed by the cobwebs, followed by the remotes to switch off TV ......... snozzed until 8.00 a.m.  :o
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on July 11, 2012, 08:59:02 AM
So it helped then?  :)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on August 03, 2012, 01:28:55 PM
August already!  :)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: honeybun on August 03, 2012, 07:06:21 PM
Soon be X**s.

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on August 03, 2012, 08:03:38 PM
Ooh you little devil you!  :diablo:
Be gone from my thread with your wicked words!  :whip:
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Tea and Toast on August 30, 2012, 10:45:51 AM
Have just started to try this. it seems very good! Thought I'd comment omit so others may notice it's here! thanks Bette for letting me know about it! X
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on August 30, 2012, 10:59:54 AM
Thanks - saved me doing the September "bump"!
It really is surprisingly good.  :)
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: flushtered on August 30, 2012, 02:24:38 PM
Interesting - will give it a go.  8)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Bette on October 03, 2012, 08:35:00 AM
October already!
Bette x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: grumpyandIknowit on April 23, 2013, 09:55:45 AM
Thanks! Have printed this off as well and well definitely give it a go - this Forum is such excellent help, I am so glad I became a member :) X
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Hurdity on September 12, 2013, 04:08:31 PM
Bumping this up as there are lots of discussions about anxiety at the mo'. Need to go back to the first post...

Hurdity x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: jo61 on September 12, 2013, 04:33:41 PM
.

Hurdity
I am going to give this a try ,it sounds really easy when I am sitting here with my normal head on, its when the monster takes over . First of all I don't usually realise Mrs Hyde has taken over and all rational thoughts have gone out the window until its too late ,secondly I don't seem to be able to get my reasoning back on track until its too late and I have put my big mouth in action before my brain and said something that I shouldn't have. My hubby has the heart of a lion but also tells me I am making him insecure at the moment , we have been in a very close relationship for nearly 20 years .How do we get through this ? I have told him about menopause etc and don't feel I could get him to read the mens section on this site. It is a pity I don't have hazard warning signals so that I am  given a wide berth when the moods start.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: carrs on September 13, 2013, 04:22:01 PM
Thanks for bumping this, hurdity.

I had not noticed it before, but I have been so anxious the past few months - frozen into inactivity - that I spotted it straight away. It seems so simple and those who tried it say it works.
I have been trying those hypnosis tapes; it doesn't really matter what they are about, but they induce a relaxing trance for a while. I want to know more about mindfulness, so I will look into that. I've started praying the Rosary again (I realise that won't suit everyone) and I think that will help - I have been too wound up for it lately.
So yes, whatever techniques work to break the anxiety cycles.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: carm 01 on September 17, 2013, 06:25:56 PM
It's so good to know I'm not alone with this anxiety thing. I had a terrible night last night as it came out of the blue after 2 weeks of feeling great. How can you become anxious laying in bed????

i have spent the day at work like a zombie but getting myself worked up now worrying I wont get any sleep tonight!! I have tried lots of different things to ease it and I too have turned to prayer. I know it's  not everyone's thing but it makes me feel better.(I always say one for you ladies who are going through this nightmare)

Carm61 XX

   
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: dulciana on October 03, 2013, 08:26:06 PM
Thanks so much or the reminder, carm 01 and Carrie.  I've been forgetting the obvious, which is shameful, isn't it?.......God knows what we're all going through, after all.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: edwina hughes on July 15, 2014, 11:56:40 AM
Thanks for this I will be giving it a try x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Lucie on January 21, 2015, 04:29:19 PM
This exercise is great - thank you for sharing!  :)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Me on February 23, 2015, 09:39:54 PM
Oh God!  THis must be for people who are already easily relaxed!  I tried it and my mind started wandering to stressful things.......
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: nelliedee on March 01, 2015, 08:37:19 PM
What I like about this exercise is that is fairly easy to remember which comes in handy when panic starts to rear its head. It really does work and has saved my bacon a few times over the past 3 years x
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: purdey on December 08, 2015, 06:32:37 PM
thank you for posting this...someone else told me about it ages ago but you have reminded me at a time when i really need it  :) X
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: maxplus4 on January 19, 2017, 08:01:54 AM
Thanks so much for this. It helps to keep me sane in the middle of the night. Anxiety is the worst symptom I am experiencing at the moment, creating a vicious circle with some digestive problems. I have been given some beta blockers for when things get bad, but was wondering whether any other medication is helping people. I usually get my anxiety attacks in the evening and during the night, so its really disrupting my life at the moment. It's also making me feel very tearful and sorry for myself. I need to nip it in the bud before it really gets a hold of me.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Shecham on March 31, 2017, 10:25:54 PM
Hi there I am new to the forum to keep it brief I started at 39 years old and done and dusted with menopause at 42 blood tests confirming. I'm now 45 and I have crippling anxiety just started HRT elleste duet 9 days ago. Since the menopause I have had a complete personality transformation I am now have agrophobia  I have no self confidence no self esteem no libido why my husband is still with me I don't know. It's been a year! I feel closed off from the world not interested in anything or anybody I feel totally soul destroyed. I have always had anxiety and depression but was controlled pretty well till menopause I don't know who I am anymore. I used to be pretty confident sociabe enjoy going out etc. I've been off work so much with anxiety I'm suprised I've still got a job but may not have soon as I will be on a stage 4 sickness. Can anybody out there relate to this personality change cos I feel like I'm the only one as all people I've spoke to who have gone through it people I know personally not on a forum have just mentioned the hot flushes  soaked in sweat dry down below etc none seem to have experienced the things I am going through I'd love any reply of support and understanding xx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Susannah on March 31, 2017, 10:50:14 PM
Hi there I am new to the forum to keep it brief I started at 39 years old and done and dusted with menopause at 42 blood tests confirming. I'm now 45 and I have crippling anxiety just started HRT elleste duet 9 days ago. Since the menopause I have had a complete personality transformation I am now have agrophobia  I have no self confidence no self esteem no libido why my husband is still with me I don't know. It's been a year! I feel closed off from the world not interested in anything or anybody I feel totally soul destroyed. I have always had anxiety and depression but was controlled pretty well till menopause I don't know who I am anymore. I used to be pretty confident sociabe enjoy going out etc. I've been off work so much with anxiety I'm suprised I've still got a job but may not have soon as I will be on a stage 4 sickness. Can anybody out there relate to this personality change cos I feel like I'm the only one as all people I've spoke to who have gone through it people I know personally not on a forum have just mentioned the hot flushes  soaked in sweat dry down below etc none seem to have experienced the things I am going through I'd love any reply of support and understanding xx

Hi Shecham

I too have experienced a shift in my anxiety for the worse since starting perimenopause.  I feel like a shadow of the person I once was and am struggling to keep normal life going.  My only hope is that things will change for the better again.  I hope your HRT helps you soon .  (((Hugs))) Susannah xxx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Dee46 on April 08, 2017, 10:11:05 AM
Hi Shesham & Suzannah

I am also struggling with this crippling anxiety have never experienced anything so bad before in my life, I feel I am just existing some days & don't know whow I am  :'( I have lost my confidence & very sensitive I go from being a bit calmer to wanting to shout, scream or cry in an instant just to get this anxiety out of me. I don't look forward to anything & cannot be bothered with people sometimes, I am 9 weeks into hrt & feel I will nevery be normal again, today I am feeling sedated & not quite here, this is scary stuff, I wake every morning with the dreads & go to bed with anxiety, this does not feel normal if only people knew how deliberating this is.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: jorainbow on April 08, 2017, 10:26:23 AM
Hi all - Yes I'm with you! I've just tried this exercise in the garden and it works but I'm not having a wobble at the minute so will keep practising! Someone also mentioned using the alphabet - 3 names with a etc. I understand though how things go out if the window when anxiety gets the better!! Xx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Dee46 on April 08, 2017, 11:14:04 AM
I also tried this exercise & then tried to remembering it one day & then the brain fog kicked in & I forgot  ;D. I use the  calm app which can help but when anxiety is high nothing seems to work it goes out the window like you said Jo!   :( .The sun is beautiful today so that definitely has an effect on mood shame my body & ;mind is not what it should be, another day off the meno calendar though!
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Kipper on September 04, 2017, 04:39:38 PM
Hi, all I'm new to the forum and and frantically reading to see if anyone else feels the same as me....insecure, sad, jealous, awkward, boring....all the horrible things that I don't want to feel. I'm normally outgoing and bubbly. What's the calm app everyone is talking about?
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: dazned on September 04, 2017, 05:07:55 PM
Hi  :welcomemm:

Introduce yourself in the new members section then you won't get missed out by folk.😀
To answer your question lots of us have felt just like you so I'm sure that you will find some kindred spirits here .
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Sunflower7 on April 06, 2018, 11:04:42 PM
This Anxiety frightens me. It seems to be worsening.  Other menopause problems are bouts of onset nausea .... hot flushes terrible, mood swings terrible ... feeling really unwell on this menopause ... new writes symptoms every day !
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Netsky on April 12, 2018, 05:25:52 AM
Hello

I joined this group only yesterday and already had a few great "insights"!

Thank you for this anxiety exercise! I commute by train most days and I had been given a similar exercise before but forgotten about it!!!

It is great to get grounded and change focus, when you are overthinking/worrying etc.

Maybe it can be combined with that calming breathing: 5 seconds in, 7 seconds out. I think it should be longer: 7 seconds in and 11 seconds out, but I don't seem to have the lung capacity to take such long breaths ....  :'(

Greetings,

Netsky
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Daisydot on April 12, 2018, 06:23:37 AM
Hi ladies and welcome to every one of you.
Everything you are experiencing is part of the 34 symptoms of menopause and it's not something that will just suddenly disappear but it is something that can be managed with the right help.the problem is finding a regime that's right for you it all takes time and patience.im 61 next month and had a surgical menopause at 42,I've just recently had to restart hrt after a 5 year break as over those 5 years things got steadily worse and it gradually creeps in,you kind of accept things as in oh I've got a new pain today or a low mood today but when it gets to crippling joint pain so you struggle to walk or function or horrible anxiety and panic attacks over nothing then you realise it's time you need help.you are in the best possible place here to get that help and support so read and post as much as you like don't be scared to ask “daft” questions or personal questions because we all have to do just that at times.use every trick in the book to keep yourself well wether it's hrt or mindlefullness or alternative therapies and remember it's just hormones and with a bit of effort you can get help to at least ease your symptoms.I am so much better than I was 6 months ago I take Oestrogel two squirts on thighs each morning and vagifem pessaries for V.A which also helps with the urogenital problems,no more uti symptoms since starting it,I'm fortunate in that it's very clear cut with having had hysterectomy I only need oestrogen it's a bit more complex for many other ladies but if you post on the new members section and give a bit of background info then some of our more enlightened ladies will come along and help you.good luck everyone xx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: angelteejay on March 08, 2020, 02:58:08 PM
Really good technique. Thank you :) I'm having a very stressful day today with anxiety high and sadness too. I find sometimes it's good to have a really big cry and really feel sorry for yourself. When this happens I wrap my arms round me, like I'm giving myself a hug and talk to the 'inner child' of which I am sure everyone has. I tell her it's ok and everything will be alright soon, a bit like a mum does her child when they are soothing or comforting them when they are upset. I find that helps too, usually when I'm feeling overwhelmed or down or sad xx
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: redrocker on May 27, 2020, 11:04:05 AM
Hi all
I havent posted for a while, and its good to touch base with you all, reading your experiences regarding anxiety has helped me as i thought ive been going a bit mad. and i really relate to anyone having to go through this.... My anxiety is also out of control, im not on any medication and was prescribed hrt last year but just didnt take it, i just had a mental block and scared myself into not taking it.

im waking up with anxiety most days, or what i think is anxiety, internally feeling like im shakey and nervous bit spaced out, butterflies feeling in tummy, this sometimes lifts after a couple of hours, but it can also stay all day and i just end up in a cycle, and at night sometimes i have actually had a couple of anxiety/panic  attacks, teeth chattering physically shaking feeling sick, emotional, tense muscles and thinking the worst, needing to wee a lot.... i definately think my anxiety is driven by a health anxiety...we are in unprecidented times and it has definately got worse over the last couple months, but in general my anxiety started 4 years ago when i stopped my periods, i have managed it up till now but its getting the better of me of late, i have today emailed my doc see what she says... mindful stuff just doesnt seem to work for me, i do try to do calm  breathing if im having a full on attack, and im lucky i have a supportive partner that wakes up with me and tries to help ground me...anxiety is awful and not good to have all the adreniline constantly going around your body, i worry it puts a strain on the heart...
thanks for letting me share my experiences
 :)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Marie200012 on October 30, 2020, 09:20:14 PM
I will give this a go! Thank you  :)
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: CherrySG on October 31, 2020, 08:10:44 AM
Hi all
I havent posted for a while, and its good to touch base with you all, reading your experiences regarding anxiety has helped me as i thought ive been going a bit mad. and i really relate to anyone having to go through this.... My anxiety is also out of control, im not on any medication and was prescribed hrt last year but just didnt take it, i just had a mental block and scared myself into not taking it.

im waking up with anxiety most days, or what i think is anxiety, internally feeling like im shakey and nervous bit spaced out, butterflies feeling in tummy, this sometimes lifts after a couple of hours, but it can also stay all day and i just end up in a cycle, and at night sometimes i have actually had a couple of anxiety/panic  attacks, teeth chattering physically shaking feeling sick, emotional, tense muscles and thinking the worst, needing to wee a lot.... i definately think my anxiety is driven by a health anxiety...we are in unprecidented times and it has definately got worse over the last couple months, but in general my anxiety started 4 years ago when i stopped my periods, i have managed it up till now but its getting the better of me of late, i have today emailed my doc see what she says... mindful stuff just doesnt seem to work for me, i do try to do calm  breathing if im having a full on attack, and im lucky i have a supportive partner that wakes up with me and tries to help ground me...anxiety is awful and not good to have all the adreniline constantly going around your body, i worry it puts a strain on the heart...
thanks for letting me share my experiences
 :)

Hi Red, I also suffer from extreme anxiety, so I know what a struggle it can be every day.

You don't have to suffer like this. Please give your hrt a try, and if you find you still suffer debilitating anxiety, I'd suggest seeing the doctor for some anti-anxiety medication.

Some of us need antidepressants and hrt. I'm on a decent amount of both. I pill-shamed myself for years but honestly, once you find the right combination it can give you a better quality of life.

Possibly don't take citalopram as mine stopped working when I started on hrt. There's a well-researched article online I found recently which proved diminished response to citalopram while on hrt. GPs probably won't know.

Good luck 🤞
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Julia99 on April 23, 2021, 04:37:08 PM
Mindfulness exercises are good. I give them to my patients 😁
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Gnatty on May 05, 2021, 04:50:08 PM
Try your HRT, you have nothing to lose. But be patient, it's not a quick fix and you may need to alter the dose to ease your symptoms. So try what your doc recommended for a few weeks and see how you feel. It's really helped my anxiety. I was initially prescribed anti depressants but then I came to realize (three years later) that my symptoms were caused by my hormones! So I swapped....
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Noestrogen on July 02, 2021, 06:47:15 PM
Here's the exercise my hynotherapist taught me last year to help me with anxiety and panic attacks. Think it's a NLP exercise as she was also qualified in that.I found it very helpful although haven't needed to use it for a while. Bear with me as will be a bit long-winded to explain.

You're going to be using 3 senses - sight (peripheral vision), hearing and touch. You can say it aloud but I always found doing it silently worked. It gets better with practice but it's the "doing" of it that's important not being good at it. If you lose the thread at any point, just start again.

Sit or lie comfortably and fix your gaze on a certain object. Start by noticing what you can see in your peripheral vision.

Here's an example of what you might say to yourself:-

I can see -

My tea mug on the table
The computer keyboard
A book

I can hear -

The hum of the computer
The wind in the trees
A car engine

I can feel -

My left forearm resting on the table
My bottom on the chair
My right big toe touching the inside of my slipper

I can see -

A picture on the wall
The wardrobe

I can hear -

The radio downstairs
The dog snoring

I can feel -

My left thigh pressing into the table
My tongue touching tne inside of my lower teeth

I can see -

The headphones on the desk

I can hear -

My breathing

I can feel -

My left thumb touching my index finger.


That's it! It takes a lot of concentration which is probably why it works. I find it gets harder to find the words as you go on - it's like your brain (and breathing) slow down and I suppose that's why it's relaxing. I used to do it lying in bed sometimes or even in the car (as a passenger!) Because my house is very quiet, I sometimes had to repeat the same sounds but that's not a problem. The "feel" one is fascinating as you're not moving and have to notice tiny sensations. My hypno said one of her clients used to go to the loos at work and do it if she was struggling.

Hope it helps - please give it a go. Even sitting here thinking about it and typing this out, I can feel myself "slowing down.

Bette x

I cant believe something so simple actually works! Why arent we taught these things in school?

Thank you so much for posting this Bette  :D
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: VictoryV on August 16, 2021, 03:54:17 AM
BRILLIANT!
This works!

Thank you Bette.

Victoria ☀️
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Wannabewell on October 17, 2021, 03:25:08 PM
Thanks for this Bette  :)

Anxiety last three days, out of blue.  Been okay up until then on 5th cycle of 2 pumps Oestrogel and Utrogestan sequi.  Not sure if it’d be due to too much or too little Oestrogel? Or as I’m perimenopausal maybe my own hormones in background?

Anyway, I found this technique helped twice today.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: Tamba on October 24, 2021, 02:34:18 PM
This is brilliant, thank you, I suffer with anxiety, and I am a over thinker,just given it a go, feel a lot calmer, will try it in bed tonight, hope it helps me sleep. hugs to all.
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: kathryn22 on February 13, 2024, 08:15:34 AM
Just seen this post
Will give it a try as I’m suffering from debilitating anxiety at the moment Anything that helps has to be worthwhile
Title: Re: 321 anti-anxiety exercise
Post by: NicNic80 on February 15, 2024, 06:53:02 AM
Morning.
Is anyone able to say that, “yes, HRT helped with my anxiety”??
I’m at my wits end. Have had depression for years (which was actually getting better last year) but in December anxiety smacked me hard in the face and is literally destroying my life.
I had many other symptoms so researched perimenopause (I’m 44 next month) and went to GP. She put me on HRT. Initially patches, which didn’t work for me (awful side effects on the synthetic progesterone) and now on gel and utrogestan.
I have a lot of stress. My job is stressful, we’re going through a house sale and moving to a new town and I have massive mum guilt as my daughter is an only child and she is upset about moving and leaving friends. I feel absolutely terrible for her (even though I know she’ll make new friends).
She can also see I’m not right and I worry I’ll create an anxious child.
I feel like an absolute failure.
I’m off work at the moment and I wake up at 4am every day with a massive tight chest and the constant worrying starts.
What do I do?!! Will HRT help?
I’ve been on it for a month now.
But I don’t know if I can wait another 3, 4, 5 months for it to actually work.
I’ve seriously had enough now  :'(