Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: Curlywurlygurly on December 01, 2020, 04:28:23 PM
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Hi everyone, so I’ve just turned 50 and been in menopause/menopausal for around 18 months (whose counting!) I had a hysterectomy around 7 years ago. I have two adult daughters.
So I’m experiencing most of the “normal “ symptoms power surges etc and am riding the storm but what is slowly destroying me is the worsening paranoia and extreme anxiety. I had some success with hypnosis but it’s back with a vengeance.
I hate myself for the things I’ve been saying/ accusing my husband of, even feeling a compulsion to look at his phone(!!!) and I’m even convinced I need to leave to make everyone’s life easier.
This is not how I am, I’m normally the rational one who everyone turns too but honestly I’m at my wits end.
Please tell me this will pass because I really am struggling.
I believe it comes in waves (? My old menstrual cycle) and my GP is not really able to help aside from prescribing propranolol.
I’ve just read this back and even to me it seems awful. :'(
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You feel awful because there's no respite for you.
Have you been diagnosed with paranoia? There are specific medications to ease symptoms which you need to discuss with your GP or Practice Nurse. You could also contact the MIND charity, I found them really supportive after a friend ended his Life. It knocked me for 6.
Sit down and discuss your feelings with your husband. It's easy to believe that we think as they do but often it ain't true! I have guilt about things I've said to mine way back to 1991 :'( but he tells me that he doesn't remember ::). Don't put your feelings onto how your husband might be thinking! Ask him.
Anxiety can be eased. Propranolol stopped the early morning surges for me since 2002. I was prescribed specific anti-anxiety medication too. You may find that keeping a food/mood/symptom diary of use to chart symptoms.
:bighug:
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Is there a reason you haven't considered hrt? Without a uterus you have no need for progesterone which is usually the difficult bit. Anxiety and insomnia were my worst symptoms, the anxiety has completely gone with hrt. I'm not sure about the paranoia as a meno symptom but it's a time of life when we start feeling old and less attractive so possibly it stems from that? IMO if your anxiety is caused by the oestrogen deficiency that comes with meno it's better to replace the oestrogen by hrt rather than using ad's.
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Thank you guys, it means a lot to have the support.
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Hi so in answer to the HRT question I’m just embarking on the oestrogen gel journey so fingers crossed.
I had been advised against anything else do to my hysterectomy (precancerous) so have been going it alone as it were. I do take a great multivitamin that has massively dampened down the sweats/flushes but it’s the psychological symptoms that plague me.
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I found oestrogel dampened down my anxiety and also lifted my flat mood. I hope it works for your more extreme-sounding symptoms. :)
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What support do you have for the paranoia? Hormones can certainly upset mental health, Dr Dalton did a lot of research [NAPS]. Let us know how you get on ?
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Hang on in there. Flushes usually go within a week or two but my anxiety and insomnia took 3 months to go completely. The psychological symptoms seem to need a build up of oestrogen. I hope you feel better soon.
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Hello Strawberrygiraffe and welcome to the forum.
I am another one who was always rational but I am now struggling with mood problems. Whilst on this 'journey' a lot of symptoms have come and gone but the mood issues have made me decide to try HRT again.
I was told by a GP that vasomotor symptoms like hot flushes respond quickly but psychological ones take longer, just as Sheila 99 has said. Waiting for improvement is hard going though and you have my sympathy!
Take care and keep posting.
K.
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Ok so here’s the latest update. The gel and I were not a good fit. It seemed to make the flushes worse so have put it on hold. The anxiety has flattened out at the mo so am playing it by ear.
Thank you all again for the support it’s such a relief to not be judged.
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Tnx for the update. Hormones rise and fall which can cause awful feelings. I may have suggested keeping a mood/food/symptom diary?
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Hi, I'm also struggling with anxiety and panics. On hrt but waiting for an appointment at the menopause clinic for advice about whether to change the dose, try gel etc. I was thinking of starting high dose Vitamin B complex to see if that will help. Does anyone have any experience of vitamin supplements?
Any advice would be great. Thank you.
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Hi HAB - have you read the threads in the 'alternative' room? Some find that supplements help until their hormones take over.
Anxiety and panic can be relieved by appropriate medication as well as HRT.
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Thanks for your reply.
I'm struggling a bit to find it! Is it in the forum?
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Yep.
If you go to the black line of words under the blue/white boxes above and press Menopause Discussion - it should pop up.
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Found it. Thank you :)
Looks like some vitamin supplements may help. Anything is worth a try.
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:medal: you'll soon get the hang of it ;-)
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Hi, I'm a bit late but my heart went out to you as I'm recovering from a similar situation.
I'm not trying to hijack this thread but wanted to tell you that I had a mental health crisis at the end of July and have not worked since. Anxiety and the worst depression I've ever experienced. October was my lowest and I felt that I no longer wanted to continue living. Luckily the staff at the local train station made sure I was safe. All down to my hormones!
This is what's helped me through the last few months:
My GP helping me to find the right antidepressant & anxiety medicine.
My lovely counsellor who helps me regain perspective
Menopause matters & all the folk here💖
Magnesium, vitamin B complex, vitamin D,
Chromium, Co enzyme q10, fish oils, probiotics for mood
My husband & family looking after me
Mindful Walking
HRT (John Studd regime)
It's taken a long time to turn the corner, adjustment of HRT & medication and a very understanding employer but I'm feeling so much better.
You will too but it takes time and patience. Hardest thing can be accepting that you need to look after yourself till you get better. Self care, being kind to yourself and asking for help are key IMO.
Good luck & keep in touch xxx
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Loved reading this thank you for sharing. I had the same late 2019 to early 2020, I felt it was a breakdown of sorts, deffinately felt I'd lost my ability to think clearly or rationally. Heaviest of depression pressing down upon me relentlessly. I Hope never to return to that dark place, but you are most definitely correct that taking the time to make yourself well, no rush just pace yourself a day at a time. firstly recognising I needed help and reaching out for it saved me after months and months of internal turmoil and silent suffering. My plan was half a day at a time then a day and then a week at a time and eventually I stopped counting how many days I had felt improvement, resting my mind and body and taking help and advice from professionals and family combined all helped me through.
Many of us battle on when we need help, and the battling on slows crimes us to a halt and we sometimes break.
But thanks to a good Dr, tweaking of meds, hrt, and love of my family I'm almost back to myself 🥰
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😍🤩
Lovely to think that I'm not alone. It's a very lonely place to be.
Although I wouldn't wish this on anyone!
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I know how you feel - I actually felt relief knowing others felt the same - then I felt guilty for feeling relieved at others anguish ,😳
We do like to be hard on ourselves I guess xxx