Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Other Health Discussion => Topic started by: westie on November 17, 2018, 07:19:38 PM
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Hello ladies
Just need to offload. We are off on a long haul holiday shortly, just me and my lovely husband and my anxiety is through the roof. It really is a lovely holiday and one we have saved hard for but at the moment I just want to stay at home-how ridiculous is that?!
I haven't said anything to my husband as I know how much he is looking forward to it and don't want to spoil things. So if anyone has any words of wisdom to calm me down so I can enjoy myself as I am supposed to do I would really appreciate it.
Thanks in advance
W xx
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Hi Westie,
I fully understand the need to stay close to home when you have anxiety/panic disorder. I sometimes wont do a longer dog walk because I'm scared ill have an attack and pass out somewhere. I sometimes have panic about driving longer distances now.
However I honestly this will be good for you. Ride the holiday anxiety, it will pass and you'll have a fabulous time xxx
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Oh Westie you're going through exactly what I am,we save all year to go on a luxurious cruise over Xmas & new year,do it every year & always look forward to it but this year I'm panicking,can't tell my husband as he is soooooo looking forward to it,like you I'd be quite happy staying at home.what the hell is wrong with me
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You both sound like you have supportive husbands so remember that you have someone on holiday with you to help you through. I don't have that luxury, it's me me and I
Enjoy both of you, I think you'll find it very relaxing and will be glad you went.
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TELL HIM!!!
Mine is aware immediately I begin to go under and from experience we know how I might be.
So I have anti-anxiety medication, i.e. a 'valium'-type pill. Knowing that I have it with me helps. Knowing that it helps within 20 mins. helps.
Explain that you are worried about spoiling it for him. Depending on the type of holiday, is there something that he can do if you decide to stay behind? Museums etc. so that at least he gets out and about, DH goes fishing or we drive to a quiet spot and simply sit. For years I had guilt about the potential to spoil things but now it's a bonus if I get to the holiday ::) and anything after is great.
Don't beat yourself up. Make sure that any paper work you have is close by and that you have copies at home. Pack early so that you don't back yourself into a corner. My clothes are laid out ready days ahead and cases close by. I put everything in at least 2 days prior to travelling ;-)
R U going somewhere nice?
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I get worried about going away. Leaving my company and my home and my parents. Hoping everyone has a great time. That kind of thing.
I find my anxiety is lessened by being super organised and really focusing on researching where we are going. Get all the guidebooks, etc etc. You will have a great time and Natural Mystic is right about having someone nice to share the experience with. Bon Voyage!
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Thank you so much ladies , horrible though this whole Anxiety thing is, it is reassuring to know I am not alone.
CKLD we are going to Dubai for a couple of days and then on to Mauritius for a week. I worry about leaving my boys ( both at Uni ) ,my elderly, but very independent Mum and my dog!! Ridiculous I know and even as I type this I feel like a spoilt child as I know others have far worse to cope with.
This crippling anxiety is by far the worst meno symptom I have had and it doesn't get any easier. If it wasn't for this forum I think would have gone completely mad a long time ago.
Jaypo I really hope you enjoy your cruise with your family at Christmas . I have stocked up on the rescue remedy and downloaded the 'Calm' app to my phone to help and am going to take your advice Mystic Meg ,ride the anxiety and try to enjoy myself.
I will let you know how it goes.
Thanks again ladies, so very much appreciated.
W xx
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Thanks westie,hope you have a nice time too 😊 xx
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Thank you so much ladies , horrible though this whole Anxiety thing is, it is reassuring to know I am not alone.
CKLD we are going to Dubai for a couple of days and then on to Mauritius for a week. I worry about leaving my boys ( both at Uni ) ,my elderly, but very independent Mum and my dog!! Ridiculous I know and even as I type this I feel like a spoilt child as I know others have far worse to cope with.
This crippling anxiety is by far the worst meno symptom I have had and it doesn't get any easier. If it wasn't for this forum I think would have gone completely mad a long time ago.
Jaypo I really hope you enjoy your cruise with your family at Christmas . I have stocked up on the rescue remedy and downloaded the 'Calm' app to my phone to help and am going to take your advice Mystic Meg ,ride the anxiety and try to enjoy myself.
I will let you know how it goes.
Thanks again ladies, so very much appreciated.
W xx
LOL at mystic meg 😂 natural mystic is my favourite bob Marley song 🎶😍
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I'm with you on the dog, no way did I leave mine in kennels - we had stay cations ;-).
That's a long way to go :-\
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Oops sorry Naturalmystic! Don't know what made me call you mystic meg😂😂 must be my addled brain!
CKLD I wouldn't put our dog in kennels either he goes to a lovely lady down the road and doesn't even say goodbye when we drop him off!
Xxx
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No loyalty there then ;D
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I can totally relate to this. Partner keeps on about going abroad in February. I'm so scared of going with my anxiety and in case I feel worse when travelling and being there. I get panicky just going the shops or out eating :( wish I could stop my worrying all the time.
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I am much better than even 5 years ago, unless anxiety strikes :-\. I try not to plan too far ahead which is difficult when travelling abroad.
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Hello ladies
Just need to offload. We are off on a long haul holiday shortly, just me and my lovely husband and my anxiety is through the roof. It really is a lovely holiday and one we have saved hard for but at the moment I just want to stay at home-how ridiculous is that?!
I haven't said anything to my husband as I know how much he is looking forward to it and don't want to spoil things. So if anyone has any words of wisdom to calm me down so I can enjoy myself as I am supposed to do I would really appreciate it.
Thanks in advance
W xx
I am not usually anxious about the holiday itself. I do want to go but I worry about feeling ill on the trip and spoiling it for others/being inconvenient to the tour leader. My particular issue concerns developing UTI symptoms at the last minute so that it is impossible to get an AB in time/have a urine test done and get the result. My pre trip concerns spoil the anticipation of the trip.
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Hi Kate,what I do is get my dr to write me a just in case prescription,they're usually quite good at doing that,then you have the antibiotics with you,it puts my mind at rest getting an infection
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Hi Kate,what I do is get my dr to write me a just in case prescription,they're usually quite good at doing that,then you have the antibiotics with you,it puts my mind at rest getting an infection
I have done that before but the GP practice is more reluctant now to do it.
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Hi ladies. Really interesting thread.
This started in the summer for me. I've always loved traveling and little adventures.got excited about them and saved hard to take myself and my children away from home as much as possible.
Since August I've been getting hugely anxious before going away. And when I'm away I just want to get home and feel up tight, rather than enjoy myself properly.
I'm glad to know I'm not alone, and what's causing this but sad to hear you have to experience this too.
I don't have any magic advice, since I've only just recognised a correlation. But I've done 5 little trips from August till now. And I've survived.
Maybe ask the GP for some diazepam in case of an anxiety emergency?
I force myself to carry on with activities and things we have planned but also make sure I have rest time to try and relax.
I hope this symptom is a passing one as I had so many plans and at the mo I doubt I'll plan any more get aways because of the anxiety it causes me, really weird.
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Does diazepam make you sleepy? I was going to ask my dr for something just in case I have a wobble
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Hi Westie, this is so me most of the time, so I can fully understand how you feel. I almost feel under pressure to have a good time, which I want to. Like some of the ladies, I have some go to meds, just in case. I also have health anxiety so I check out where the nearest clinics etc are. A day at a time is best and try not to be too hard on yourself. Have a great time, sounds fun and will be! X
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All benzos can cause drowsiness. If I take one immediately it's more likely to help me cope. If anxiety has floored me then I need to sleep anyway.
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Gosh! I wasn't expecting such a reaction to my post. In a way it's is reassuring that I am not alone with this feeling but not nice that so many of us have the same problem. I do always travel with anti bio's for. UTI since I was caught out a few years ago and spent days in agony which rather spoilt the end of our holiday. Maybe that's where my anxiety started -who knows. I seem to stress about everything these days...... Don't even get me started on the health anxiety..... I have to give myself a good talking to and try not to overthink which is easier said than done.
Thanks again for your support ladies, I'll report back to let you know how I got on.
Xxx
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This is my holiday experience for the last few years -
A. Book holiday and can't wait to go.
B. Count down the months/weeks.
C. Two weeks before we go, start to worry about trivial "what if"
D. Hope that holiday is cancelled by ferry company/cruise line/hotel.
E. Start packing and worry what I've forgotten.
F. Load car and leave.
G. Enjoy holiday.
Get home and decide that in future I'm not going to do C - E but I always do. ::)
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Haha so funny two hoots,why are we all so alike? I would never have believed there were so many women just like me.today I'm looking forward to my fab Xmas & new year cruise but come the 20th December?🤪😱😩😢🤯 every emotion under the sun & all in one day 😂
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This is my holiday experience for the last few years -
A. Book holiday and can't wait to go.
B. Count down the months/weeks.
C. Two weeks before we go, start to worry about trivial "what if"
D. Hope that holiday is cancelled by ferry company/cruise line/hotel.
E. Start packing and worry what I've forgotten.
F. Load car and leave.
G. Enjoy holiday.
Get home and decide that in future I'm not going to do C - E but I always do. ::)
I do most of these except D (and F due to not having a car). I have occasionally cancelled a whole trip (not an expensive package where I would lose more than just the flight) and then regretted it. I have also gone on a trip and had it spoilt by genuine illness. After an unnecessary cancellation, I do tell myself "Next time you don't cancel" but, on the next occasion, I still think "Every situation is different....!"
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Whenever I go away, I tend to worry about my OH.
Like, what if HE gets ill, or something really bad happens like he has a heart attack
or something really bad like that while we're away.
It's crazy really. I worry about how I'd cope if something happens to him, NOT myself.
I don't tend to worry about myself, if I get ill, I can handle that, but worry myself sick
over him, especially if we're in another country and it's just us two....
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I'm so sorry ladies if I've just started another worry for you.
Maybe you've not thought of that one, and now it's another thing you've got
to worry about.......apologies.......x
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Illness is covered by point C ;D. I take the equivalent of a medium sized pharmacy in my luggage ::)
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It's ok jillydoll by all accounts you're taking my husband 😂🤣
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As long as he's fit and well, he can come...lol. 🏝
Or else I'll be fretting about him.....🤦♀️ 😂 lmao
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😂
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At the moment we are planning a Baltic cruise next year, I might have to add a new category UK/Russia relations and a trip to France so UK Brexit implications :o
If I'm going on a ferry or cruise I study the shipping forecast several times a day, for days before we are due to travel ::)
I'm sorry if I'm adding to anyone's list of things to fret about
:madeyes:
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You MUST enjoy your cruise,I'm a bit of a cruise junkie & many a time going across the bay of Biscay I've just lain on my bed & chilled as it can be soooo rough across there 🤢 bigger ships are obviously more stable so I'd opt for one over a hundred tonnes
Have you been on one before?
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Yes I love a cruise holiday, we went to the canaries and Morocco in October, it was brilliant. I don't like flying so we sail from Southampton, it's a great way to see places that we wouldn't be able to see otherwise. The Baltic has been on our must do list for a few years, have you been
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Oh we check the forecast B4 we plan a fishing trip ;D on a lake for trout ::)
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Oh we check the forecast B4 we plan a fishing trip ;D on a lake for trout ::)
You can't be too careful
:lol:
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Yes I love a cruise holiday, we went to the canaries and Morocco in October, it was brilliant. I don't like flying so we sail from Southampton, it's a great way to see places that we wouldn't be able to see otherwise. The Baltic has been on our must do list for a few years, have you been
Oh yes we love our cruises,we go to canaries & Madeira over Xmas & new year & especially enjoy Norway,like you I don't like flying so just a couple of hours drive to Southampton but like you also the anxiety has been a first for this cruise but I'm determined not to spoil it.hope you get to the Baltic's & ENJOY 😊
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We really liked Madeira when we stopped in October, the weather was a bit drizzly in the morning but it didn't stop us going ashore. We walked around Funchal towards the market, what a lovely market, so many exotic fruits on offer and lots of samples to taste :)
The fireworks are supposed to be fantastic on New Year's Eve, I can just imagine up on deck with a nice pina colada ......... ;D
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Will you two please shut up! :rofl: I'm sick with envy.......🤮
Only joking ladies,
Enjoy your cruises 🚢 I hope to try one out one day, I hate flying, but I'm not sure about a cruise ship either.
I've been on a couple of ferries in my time, but not a cruise ship. The size of them scares the life outa me...🙀
Enjoy girls, you deserve it............🛳
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They put something in the water on the cruise ships, it's addictive, as soon as I get home I'm looking for next year ::)
If you are tempted a 7 nights to the fjords is a good option, but you are warned its very addictive ;D
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Oh yes jillydoll,you must try one 😊 we go especially to see fireworks in Madeira,I'm not really a fan of them but oh my, I was speechless.........first for everything 😬
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I'd love to go on a cruise but DH doesn't do boats/ships etc which I find very strange as both his Mum and Dad worked on cruise liners !!!
Lanzalover x
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hi Lanzalover,we're of to canaries soon & going to lanzarote😊 you'd think cruising would be in your husbands blood,it's sooooo relaxing,once you get over your anxiety (with me) 🤨
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No cruise ships for me ladies, too scared it might sink. Ever heard of the Indianapolis 😁
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I'll just walk around ship with my life jacket on 24/7 😄
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This post and the answers could have been written by me. I want to go on holidays, but as the date looms, I wish it could be cancelled. I always go , but spend most of the time looking forward to coming home ! Definitely want to try a cruise though, the Fiords appeal.
Just looking at my " travel medicine bag" which I keep permanently in my case, the zip just about closes. Years ago it was all about toiletries and fake tans before going away, now it's GP appointments and just in case prescriptions !
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At least I could be shut in the cabin ......... would need to have a port hole but if the water went up and down outside :-\
I would love to see the Northern Lights. I got as far as ordering a brochure for no-fly cruises in about 2003 ;D then Himself decided he would be bored :D
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He wouldn't be bored!he'd be with you clkd 😂
The fjords are the most tranquil place in the world,anxiety disappears,it's just getting there 🤣 Evelyn,my medicine bag is full of just in case medicines,vitamins & actual medicines,in fact I say bag,more of a suitcase
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Oh jaypoo - hadn't thought of that retort ;D
I always want to get home to see if I've been OK or been plagued by panic :'( but have learned to enjoy the less anxious moments by standing. Simply breathing in.