Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Alternative Therapies => Topic started by: Poppi on June 20, 2018, 09:27:26 PM
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Hi Ladies, just wondering if anyone takes any vitamins for anxiety? I already take amitriptaline and co-codamol for a serious back problem, but feel so weepy, not depressed just a little "dull" rather than bright. I'm beginning to think it is a genetic thing this "dull" feeling as my toxic mother was always negative and I feel I could be turning into her - God forbid!
Thanks in advance
Poppi x
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Should have added that I have EVERYTHING I could ever want, have a lovely family, 1st grandchild on the way, 2 wonderful kids, husband who is good really but is not coping with me as the moaning minnie I've become (told him today that if he wanted to find someone else to be with that was ok with me - how could I say such an awful thing to him? But that's how I feel when he doesn't understand I want my own space and need time to myself - how greedy can you get (me I mean))
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Px
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Hi,
Have you tried counselling or CBT? I had counselling through the NHS a couple of years ago and it was great, though I realise it's not everyone's cup of tea.
The problem with St Johns Wort is that it interacts with so many medicines and with HRT that you have to be taking nothing else if you're taking that.
Are you taking time to do things you enjoy? That's really important. For me, that's fresh air, countryside, walking or riding my bike.
Wilks xx
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Have you tried vit D? That can help lift mood x
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Why not tell him, it gives him an option and opens the way for conversation! I did the same in the 1990s ....
Have you printed off the 'hints for husbands' from here? Maybe give them to him to read ;)
Make a list of which symptoms you would like to ease and see your Practice Nurse or GP. Eating regularly can ease anxiety surges. There is appropriate medication but St John's Wort is for depression in the main.
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Hi poppi.
The only thing that helped my anxiety was antihistamines.
But they've got side effects, like drying you out, headaches, ect
But they really did help.
I'm actually back on them now for a different reason, (I've got a liver condition)so hopefully
my anxiety should lessen even more. (My hrt does help..)
As for turning into our mothers, how about mother in law,?
Think I would kill myself......lol
Jdx
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Poppi, not genetic but very common at this stage of life! you are not on your own that's for sure. I have had to increase my AD as the weepy episodes were becoming way too frequent and then the anxiiety raised its ugly head! it may do good to speak to your GP
Best wishes x
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I would also recommend counseling as it really helped me when I had PND. Talking to my husband was good but not all the time as he was getting fed up of me moaning all the time & so an independent person really helped me & my marriage. I wish I could do it again actually with meno. Xx
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Hello again,
I forgot about this question (among other things!) but thanks for your replies. I have GP appointment next week so will make a list of things to ask. I've had counselling 3 times and while it helped short term, I know I need something else now too. All I want to do most of the time is very little, read, play the piano, be in my bed (can be for 11 hours at a time as I feel safe and out of the way there) and this annoys my husband as he is a very active, fast-forward kind of man. He is super-sweet to others, it's like flicking on a switch and he goes from "bear with a sore head" to "can't do enough to help". I brought this up yesterday and he said I was exactly the same. I used to sometimes say thanks to him for being such a lovely man and helping (with chores etc) and he said he's nice to me if I'm nice to him. That's a big responsibility if him being sweet and nice to me is only as a result of me being sweet and nice to him?
Oh I'm tying myself up in knots here! Jillydoll, when you say antihistamines helped you - how did that work? I have some for when I get hayfever badly and can't sleep, so hopefully that's a potential help. I wish sometimes that I hadn't retired as I feel kind of homesick and miss the people I worked with very much. I have never cried so much for so long EVER, I'm worried about forgetting so much, being so lazy, my hair coming out, looking a mess, my nails breaking and being sore, not being able to make simple decisions never mind harder ones...........if I likes the taste of alcohol I could quite happily drink myself into oblivion.
Goodness me, I came on here meaning to ask advice for a firming cream for crepey skin on my neck/bust and hooded eyelids, sorry it has turned into such a moan.
Poppi x
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Poppi - welcome to MM
There are few things you have mentioned in your various posts that I feel are significant:
You are on painkillers and Amitriptyline for back pain and these could be contributing to your low mood and the lack of ‘joy in life'. Amitriptiline is an anti depressant and these will often make one feel numb or flat and detached from life.
You say you wish you hadn't retired so you are feeling a great sense of loss and probably a big drop in self confidence.
You are also spending more time with your husband and even the happiest of marriages can struggle when they spend too much time together.
You say you often spend 11 hours in bed each day - this is not good for your health and well-being - physically or mentally.
What is actually wrong with your back? I know from my own experience that GPs are very keen to simply kosh patients who have back pain with heavy duty painkillers and ADs when in fact there may be other options. I have degeneration in my lower spine with a bulging disk but I had to see a rheumatologist privately to get this diagnosis. My GP just wanted me on amitriptyline which gave me horrid side effects. Co-codamol is very addictive and difficult to come off, it can cause bad constipation, so is really not good to be on unless absolute necessary.
Appropriate exercise, physiotherapy and perhaps socialising a bit more might really help you. I know this won't be easy - the rheumatologist told me to keep moving and not sit down too much and many of us want to hide away at this time of life.
Have a really good at your lifestyle choices. Don't try to change everything at once and don't be ambitious but perhaps set a simply routine that you can easily do e.g.
eat small highly nutritious meals regularly. Cut out as much sugar and saturated fat as possible.
Take three, ten minute walks each day and walk as fast as you can.
Get out in the sunshine to increase your vitamin D absorption. Symptoms of vitamin D deficiency are, low mood, low immunity, aching joints and fatigue.
Be kind to yourself and do things that you enjoy to boost your confidence.
There is only so much your husband can do to help you - I think your job was a very important part of your life so maybe you could get involved in a local charity or club that uses your skills and experience. Don't waste your talents.
The answer is probably not more pills and potions but just some simple changes in your lifestyle.
BTW - the Clinique Smart creams are great for dry, sagging skin - they gives a radiant glow.
DG x
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Hi. Dancing Girl gave some great advice there. I just want to empathise as I also have 1) A highly toxic mother who lives close and 2) A nice then nasty husband. I found in my 20s /30s these things didn't effect me much; I felt mentally stronger and just got on with things. I feel now in my late 40s and in peri much more vunerable . My mind dwells on the history of my bad relationship with my mother (who has got more toxic with age) and like you my husband doesn't know how to cope with my anxiety and low mood (he once told me I should be in a loony bin when I couldn't cope...I know he didn't mean it but he is used to me being the family rock. I too would say don't go down the vitamin route. I thought I could find a magic pill to take that dull feeling away. I took Menopace & lots of Vita for 3 months then got a strange liver enzyme result. Came off them and it was fine again. Things will change. Be gentle to yourself but also try and fight it/keep busy. It is not easy.xx
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Totally empathize Poppi
I take Valerian tablets which help a bit & try & do muscle relaxation meditation.
It is so hard trying to appear normal for other people when they don't understand. My OH tries to understand sometimes but when he is busy or stressed himself he can be very flippant & unhelpful. I suppose it is hard for other people to understand if they haven't been through it themselves.
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Hi again and thanks for very helpful advice. Very quick history update-my back condition is Degenerative disc disease. I had to be cut out of car after head on collision with a lorry. I had head/brain injury, in a coma for 5 days. This was in the 1970s when there was no aftercare or effective treatment. Throw the Menopause into my life and I've been very lucky to have the GPs I'm seeing.
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Blood tests 3 weeks ago showed up low calcium and red blood cell count. OTC supplement recommend by my GP. Painful sex now sorted out :wub: and new HRT obviously working 😊
On top of that, I'm now Granny Poppi and our wee bundle of joy is a welcome addition!
Granny Poppi 💕 xx
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Thank you Sparkle
:love: :party:
Poppi x
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Amitryptyline has a sedative effect and when combined with co-codamol its even worse. I was in a car accident in 2010 and hurt my left shoulder and my neck. The pain was horrendous for 2 and a bit years, then it settled and then settled some more but it resulted in tingling and loss of feeling in my left hand. They gave me amityptyline, butrans patches which are morphine based, gabapentin for the tingling, co-codomol and after 2 years my family thought I had alzheimers! I couldn't speak, couldn't think, could barely move, spent 10 hours a day in bed. On one visit to the neurologist he actually told me to give them all up "as the treatment is worse than the problem". I followed his advice - it wasn't nice coming off them and it needs to be supervised but all I can say is I don't sleep 10 hours a day and I can string a sentence together!
I use co-codamol only when the pain goes above 7 and other wise they have prescribed 12 hour Arthrotec which is effectively the trade name of a type of diclofenac. I also use topical ibruprofen gel - in fact I have been know to cover my left side in it when the pain gets outside what I can deal with. Sometimes it's unpleasant buy the other drugs had built up in my system and were having no real beneficial effect just tricking my body into assuming it was in pain all the time so it needed more drugs.
I have swopped those problems for a few others - the menopause no less - but with the help of this forum I am a work in progress as far as that is concerned. Interestingly the accident was slap bang in the middle of me being peri and some of achy joints other than the ones I damaged and the tiredness was due to that as well as the powerful drugs they gave me.
Congrats to Granny Pops! :congrats:I hope you can find a way to feel better so that you can run around with your new addition. I know its really really scary getting rid of the pain killers but sometimes they cause more problems than they solve
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I've just discovered Inositol, a 'non essential' vitamin. I was looking into it for sleep only to find it seems to be extremely effective for anxiety, panic disorder and depression.....have a google. It's a kind of B vitamin I think.
My anxiety has **much** improved recently but I'm not sure why as I started taking Inositol (about 6000 mg per day in divided doses), at the same time as starting CBD and taking 50 mg Trazodone at night for sleep.