Menopause Matters Forum

Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: rebel2 on March 27, 2018, 03:23:19 PM

Title: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on March 27, 2018, 03:23:19 PM
Like many of you, my worst symptom has been anxiety.   Specifically health anxiety.   I have had numerous ailments, all of which sent me into meltdown, and all of which disappeared eventually.    But am now having worst physical bout - have been stressed for a lot of this year with a house move and various other things, so perhaps my body is just giving way, but it is a vicious cycle as I can't get rid of the health anxiety until the symptoms go, and I can't get rid of the physical symptoms until the anxiety goes..

At the moment is the old trapped wind under the left rib symptom - not there when I wake, then creeps up on my through the day and moves round to my back.  Goes if I'm with people and very busy/distracted but since Friday it has been constant and has become gurgling/IBS type feeling.  Had it twice before and each time it took several months to go completely.   I think constant anxiety just eventually gets to my stomach and eats away at it, and it just takes time to settle down again.  Drives me mad as life has settled down and all is going well now with lots to look forward to.   

Am going to bite the bullet and seek out a psychotherapist.  Have tried CBT but it's not for me, so want some serious professional help this time.   Can't get GP appointment for five weeks, so hope physical symptoms have gone by then. 

Just wanted sympathy!
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Robin on March 27, 2018, 03:51:19 PM
Lots of sympathy from me rebel2.

 I have struggled a lot with anxiety and depression since becoming perimenopausal and I also get that pain under my left rib. When it's especially bad my tummy just below that left rib pulls right in noticeably. It's really uncomfortable but I have no idea what is causing it other than I'm sure it's something to do with my tummy and bowel. It started over 30 years ago so long before menopause, anxiety and depression for me but I'm still here so I guess it can't be anything sinister. I do think anxiety and bowel issues often go hand in hand though.

I hope you manage to access a psychotherapist and get the support you're looking for.

Warm hugs
Robin
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Snoooze on March 27, 2018, 04:08:37 PM
Anxiety triggers IBS as does stress. My anxiety has been better the last 6 months but I've just had a stressful few weeks and my ibs is playing up and my anxiety creeping back in but I'm trying to fight it.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Daisydot on March 27, 2018, 04:27:24 PM
Exactly the same here ladies I've been popping painkillers since start of weekend for pain up back to shoulders and ribs are sore.Its the same old same old for me,my stress levels have been so high these last couple of weeks and my bowels dredful.
I remember a few years ago my then go wanted to send me to a colorectal surgeon which being health anxious scared the crap out me so I went to my gp in Spain,I used to do three months there three month U.K.,charity work,anyway he told me I had picked up a bowel bacteria prob in the Caribbean and then gave me appropriate medicine,he also gave me sedatives as he said because of my health anxiety I was twisting my bowel and increasing my pain so I had to have a calmer life lol.he looked about 14 years old but he left my U.K. gp standing for common sense and he was so right.His meds sorted me out in a week but the twisting bowel sensation continues and gives me this pain when I'm over stressed,I really wish I had some good old Valium sometimes but that's like gold dust these days isn't it.back to the meditation I suppose lol.good luck ladies hope this sorry tale helps xx
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Ambergirl on March 27, 2018, 07:40:26 PM
Hi Daisydot,
I totally get the health anxiety thing now I am in the midst of menopause. I have had lots of weird aches and pains and currently have had pain in my lower right abdomen and groin for 2 months. I've had blood tests, an x-ray and ultrasound (which showed nothing odd) but I still have the pain and no answers. It is frustrating and I understand that you need sympathy too! I was offered cbt too and it just seemed like filling in bits of paper and ranking numbers of anxiety which totally did not help.
I would like to know if you get someone to talk to that helps as I was thinking of doing the same. Do keep telling yourself it will be fine and that is it just something to accept, treat as well as you can and above all be kind to yourself. :)
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Daisydot on March 27, 2018, 08:38:43 PM
Hi Ambergirl no I don't have anyone other than my perfect husband of 43 years lol I don't half chew his ear at times but he is my rational half.You just have to keep telling yourself it's mind games the hormones are playing.dont let anyone tell you that your pains are not real because they are it's how you deal with them that matters.rest the mind and the body,I couldn't even begin to tell you the anxiety I've had over health issues but I'm still here plodding away.take care xx
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Dorothy on March 27, 2018, 09:30:50 PM
I do sympathise soooooo much.  I'm currently stressing that a mole is cancerous, even though I've had it all my life and it hasn't changed or grown at all!  Seriously?!!!!!  If I'd been carrying round a cancerous lump for nearly 43 years, I think it would have 'got' me by now, but arguing logically doesn't stop the stress!  I know in a couple of weeks, I'll have moved on to worry about something else...
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on March 28, 2018, 07:34:58 AM
Thanks everybody.  Am trying to fight it and determined to win.   What is so distressing is that I have a lovely life except for this anxiety and feel loads of it is passing by as I just want to get to the point where I'm ‘better'.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on March 28, 2018, 11:36:59 AM
You can have sympathy.  Have you tried anti-anxiety medication, sorry I can't remember ........ Rescue Remedy can help too as can eating regularly to keep blood sugar levels even.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Yammy1 on March 28, 2018, 12:19:52 PM
Hi rebel2. So sorry to hear your anxiety is so bad. I've been doing well since starting ads in November but the anxiety is creeping back  >:(. I woke during the night with cheat pain and feelings extremely  dizzy, cought m off guard as I couldn't explain dizziness while I was just sleeping not bending or moving around. I actually stayed in bed this morning thinking what's the point in carrying on feeling scared and anxious all the time. Feeling my family would be better off without me, I'm up now and thinking a lot straighter, I know this will pass but it's so bloody annoying just when I was getting used to feeling a bit more 'normal' this health anxiety creeps back. I always think I'm going to take a heart attack even though I've been checked out and told my heart is fine, I think the only way I'll believe this is if the cardiologist moves in with me lol. I really hope you feel better soon, just pray for an end to this nightmare. Sending  :bighug:
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Daisydot on March 28, 2018, 01:02:29 PM
Here's one for you too yammy1  :bighug: 😘
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on March 28, 2018, 01:50:44 PM
'vicious' that's a really good word for anxiety ......... relentless too sometimes  >:(
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: dulciana on March 28, 2018, 01:56:02 PM
And it comes and goes, too, doesn't it?   I find it wrecks my sleep, which then makes me feel worse, which brings on the health anxiety again.............
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on March 28, 2018, 02:55:18 PM
That may be cortisol, the hormone that wakes us.  I would wake suddenly in deep dread .......... appropriate medication helped.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on March 29, 2018, 09:37:07 AM
Am really miserable with this now.  Can't get rid of weird trapped wind feeling under left rib - it goes around the back and then gurgling starts.   I don't think it is there when I first wake [and I slept through last night - over 7 hours!] but I tend to 'scan' my body to check for issues and then it creeps back, along with adrenaline surges, which I suppose just exacerbate the whole issue.   Last time I broke the cycle by trying sertraline, which caused horrendous anxiety/stomach cramps so I gave up and, hey presto, all stomach issues went for a couple of months.

I was fine until further stress/anxiety built up over a month or so and then it started again. Do you think I will have to accept that I have some kind of stress related IBS issues now?
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Snoooze on March 29, 2018, 03:58:47 PM
It definitely sounds like ibs Rebel. If you are stressed it will be causing it. When I'm feeling OK, I can eat things no bother yet if I am having an ibs attack, those same foods cause it.
My anxiety has been at bay for 5 months but it's slowly creeping back in. I've had 3 attacks since Sunday and have to keep fighting to not let it win.
Hope it eases soon.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: dulciana on March 29, 2018, 08:15:28 PM
First of all, a big  :hug: to everyone who's posted on this thread.  At least we all know we're not alone!  My worst anxiety seems to strike in the middle of the night when it's really quiet and there's nothing to stop me from over-thinking.  Then I get the physical kick-back and the anxiety starts to spiral.  At this time of year, I'm actually really glad when some early-morning birdsong starts up, 'cos then I've got an excuse to go downstairs and make a cup of tea, come back up and put the radio on ever-so-quietly-so's-not-to-wake-Hubby!   If I do wake him up, after I've said sorry and he realises I'm in a bit of a state, I get a cuddle and kiss and at that point, the anxiety starts to settle down........
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Charliegirl@ on March 31, 2018, 12:07:45 PM
Hi  CKLD you me tioned blood sugar in a post, is this part of meno as I have it really badly at the moment.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on April 01, 2018, 11:11:49 AM
Can't seem to break this current cycle.  Usually running, or being distracted would do it, but this time it really is a stayer.   Constant trapped wind feeling and racing thoughts, jumping from one potential [but very unlikely] disaster to another. 

 :-\
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on April 01, 2018, 01:04:30 PM
Panic ain't logical! even when we know what may be causing it.  I know how flight/fight response works but once it hits, there is no way of thinking out of it, I have to take an emergency med..  I know that works and that within 25-40 mins. I'll be OK!

That tightness under the rib may be tension caused by anxiety.  Have you tried the relaxation from toes upwards, i.e. stretching toes, holding for 1, 2, 3 and relax: working through all the muscle groups all that way up the body, concentrating totally on those groups?  It can ease symptoms but don't over-stretch or you will get cramp!

Brisk walking.  This under ribs feeling hasn't killed you so is probably within normal limits 4 today!  Is it painful enough to take 'nurofen'-type tablet?
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Jeepers on April 01, 2018, 05:44:52 PM
Hi Rebel2

I know exactly what you mean.  I have been suffering with what I now assume to be a gastric problem. Pain under my left lower ribs, which sometimes travels round to the back.  Burning across all of my upper abdomen at times, and little appetite. I have been taking Omeprazole for 4 days, and it does seem to be helping with the pain, but its not completely gone.  I wonder if its due to an acute anxiety attack a week ago, leading to a bout of gastritis?  Of course my health anxiety tells me it is something more sinister, and I am trying to not panic over that, so its  a vicious circle isn't it?

for me its like when you dig a hole in the sand.  As fast you dig the hole, more sand collapses into the hole to replace it.  So as soon as one symptom disappears, another comes along to make you panic about something else. And feeling rubbish all the time, you do think there must be something serious don't you?

I now also have pain down one side of my head, from my jaw to my temple.  And a strange pain in my right upper arm, as well as twinges in my right leg.  I just want to escape my own body.  :'(

How are you feeling now Rebel?

Jeepers xx

Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on April 01, 2018, 06:09:26 PM
Jeepers - your symptoms may be muscular.  As oestrogen levels drop muscles may become lax = aches and pains.  Which , fortunately, don't happen all over the body at the same time.

I think we focus more on the various niggles ...........
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Jeepers on April 01, 2018, 06:15:52 PM
Hi CLKD

Yes, you are probably right.  Right arm stated aching when i went to get the washing in.  And anxiety exacerbates things by making us tense up. I think I need to take a daily epsom salt bath with Nick Drake (not literally!) to try to relax more. 

Do you take anti anxiety meds? I thought you mentioned them on another thread?

thank you

Jeepersx
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Scotdownunder on April 01, 2018, 07:03:51 PM
Hi Rebel,
I feel for you. I had been getting more tired, more stressed and spent last weekend in a down spiralling anxiety attack, with worsening ibs.

Now on escitopralam and feel so much better. All my normal stress replied techniques had stopped working, but this has stopped the whirling monkey mind of doubt.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Joaniepat on April 02, 2018, 06:50:35 AM
 :hbday: :cake:
Happy birthday rebel2. Hope your stomach settles down soon and that you have a lovely day.
JP x
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on April 02, 2018, 11:26:23 AM
I have taken anti-depressants since 198? and GP added a beta-blocka in 2002.  These stop the anxiety surges.  If anxiety takes over then I have an emergency medication to take, which work within 20-45 mins..  Otherwise I wouldn't be here.  Knowing what causes it doesn't stop the physicality of symptoms!

Have you thought of swallowing a rennie or similar rebel2 when that burning starts, two chewed will work down and ease symptoms.

How are you spending your Day?   :party09:
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: dulciana on April 02, 2018, 01:45:28 PM
I've had a lot of anxiety recently, which has made me lose a lot of sleep, be less active and gain weight.  The clothes that I've got lined up for my holiday are now all a bit tight.   I've read that anxiety and broken sleep patterns can both lead to weight-gain - well, they certainly seem to have done that to me.  Before the meno, someone at work said to me, "There's nothing of you!"   Hmmm...don't think she'd say that now.   I want to forget my worries and switch off when I'm away, so that I can sleep well and enjoy exploring the place, shedding some pounds in the process.   My daughter has told me I need to get fit on holiday and then stay fit when I get back.   She's right, of course, but she doesn't understand how your get-up-and-go can get up and go at this time of life.  I'm sure my destructive and pervasive anxiety is at the bottom of my weight-gain (no pun intended...)  Thanks for listening, ladies.   
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Snoooze on April 02, 2018, 03:55:43 PM
I have gained weight in the last year and I do put some of it down to how bad my anxiety became last year. I've always had it but during peri it became really bad and was almost 24/7. I'm feeling better lately but depressed about how much weight I have gained and how none of my clothes fit. I've been dieting but haven't lost a pound! Most disheartening. I know i have to exercise as well but my favourite form of exercise is brisk walking and in this weather, I don't have the motivation.

Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: dulciana on April 02, 2018, 04:01:48 PM
It's really difficult, isn't it, Snoooze?  Your story sounds pretty much like mine!  I actually made myself go for a brisk walk immediately after posting here this afternoon   (guilt? ::) motivation?) but one swallow doesn't make a summer and as for keeping it up.................time will tell!
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on April 02, 2018, 06:08:18 PM
It would have been wading here  :-\
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: knorman on April 04, 2018, 08:36:08 AM
Nick Drake calms me too.  We bought a beautiful book about him when we were in Much Wenlock and its signed by his sister.  Very special.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on April 04, 2018, 09:19:38 AM
When distracted my symptoms go, and then settle into discomfort in my left back.   But am conscious of a constant sense of doom.  Feel I am deep into anxiety cycle now.  Last time this happened I tried sertraline but found it brutal so stopped after three days and swore never again.    Now perhaps I need to try another AD.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Yammy1 on April 04, 2018, 11:45:29 AM
So sorry Rebel to hear your feeling so down, i really think you should try ads again, I know from experience they can take quite a while to work but believe me they can be a life saver. Ask doc for an emergency pill, I.e Xanax to take the edge off the initial few weeks, I know when I started citalopram I felt sooo much worse but I'm so glad I stuck with them. I'm not 'cured' but I can do normal everyday things like shopping and socializing I'm even going to Majorca with hubby on Sunday for a short break, three months ago I didn't want to leave the house. I'm only on 10mg and for now that's enough for me. Sending you  :bighug:
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Jeepers on April 05, 2018, 05:55:27 PM
Hi Rebel

I hope you had a nice birthday, and  you are feeling better.

I know exactly how you feel, it feels like the cycle of anxiety is pulling you down ever further.  I had a really bad anxiety attack a coule of weeks ago, which resulted in some horrendous physical symptoms, which someone suggested was gastitis.  Which I think it was, but of course the anxiety makes you think its something much much worse.

I second listening to Nick Drake to try to relax (knowman, i am so jealous, I have been a Nick Drake fan since the age of 20), and my other go to music is Norah Jones.  so soothing.  I lie down in a darkened room with a lavendar candle and just let the music wash over me.  It does help with the impending doom sensations.

Jeepers

Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: knorman on April 06, 2018, 07:53:12 AM
Yep, Norah jones is one of mine too.  I'd always imagined a deserted Californian beach when I listened to her and a few years back we went on a US road trip.....and I found my beach. Drakes beach, we took a little video, so now I am able to play it back, those waves are very restful.
We've finally had our bathroom refitted and I am looking forward to winter evenings in the bath doing exactly as you described!

I saw a maxillofacial surgeon recently with regard to dry, sore mouth and although I know this, he explained again how the anxiety is able to make the brain produce the weirdest sensations and symptoms.  He was very kind and he could see how bad the anxiety is.  He also talked about the good angel and the bad devil on our shoulders, one trying to help, the other trying to sabotage our good intentions and our more rational thoughts (when we have them)!  He saw right into my head. rebel2 you have proved this to yourself and like you I try to keep myself distracted.  Not so easy with the rotten weather we have been having, but keep at it.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on April 06, 2018, 08:02:33 AM
Knorman, he sounds like a lovely man!  When I had my first panic attack four years ago, my GP was very curt and harsh.   She never told me it was a panic attack, just dismissed me and made me feel very silly.   I think that started off a horrible mental cycle that means I am essentially embarrassed and ashamed of my anxiety which means I fight it, which makes it worse.

I'm going to find a good therapist as I think talking it through with someone who doesn't treat me with scorn will help get to the bottom of my lack of self-esteem. 

Feeling better every day, so whilst this has been a very long bout of anxiety induced stomach issues, I might be on the way back up.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: knorman on April 06, 2018, 08:52:16 AM
My other half had been telling me all the same things regarding the anxiety as the consultant, but sometimes it does take an 'outsider' to help, plus of course he had the medical expertise.  If I could afford to, I would see him for a weekly, just for a therapy session!  As he was a surgeon, I was extremely anxious that he may have been curt and harsh and he was the exact opposite, so if you find the right person, I think they will really help you.  It does sound like you are on the way up so start looking for that therapist today, whilst you are feeling more positive. That in itself you help you feel better.  My therapy and goal for today is tackling a raised bed full of weeds and hoping.....hoping....that the sun comes out a bit more! Let is know how you get on.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on April 06, 2018, 07:29:27 PM
Years ago when. I had psychotherapy Himself used to say "I told you all that" .......... but it did take a stranger to whom I was able to unload to help my brain - discuss, decide, ditch  ;)

Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Jeepers on April 15, 2018, 06:00:07 PM
Hi Rebel

How are things going?  Hopefully, you are still on the way up.  Have you had any luck finding a therapist or psychologist yet?

Jeepers x
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on April 16, 2018, 08:08:56 PM
Still on the up thanks Jeepers.  Still considering therapist as I can't seem to stop irrational thoughts crowding my mind.   When I'm working or with people and distracted all my physical symptoms disappear or cease to bother me, but the minute i'm Quiet they're back.   I can't seem to stop myself scanning for symptoms.

But I am better than I was!!
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: dulciana on April 16, 2018, 09:47:49 PM
It is a real trial, isn't it?  When we we arrived on holiday the other week, I was in a very anxious state at first, to the point where it kept me awake at night and Hubby too, who had to calm me down.   I'd left things like my little lavender bag and my magnesium spray at home, both of which help so much at night.  BUT.........we were so wowed by the place and did so much walking everywhere, all day every day for five days, that my anxiety fizzled out and my head hit the pillow into Zzzz land straight away each night.  There was one blip when the power shower (which was like Niagara Falls  ::) !), gave me such a jump when I switched it on that it slightly put me back to square one, but even this didn't win out over my knackered muscles and ton-weight eyelids.  Now I'm home, my little friend the Anx Monster comes back again whenever I've got time to sit and/or think.   It's definitely confirmed for me, though, that it can be beaten if I have a focus outside of myself and/or the house. 
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: jenjog on April 17, 2018, 09:54:56 AM
I'm glad I'm not alone in this. My anxiety has been awful, I've always been a bit of a worrier but this hit me like a ton of bricks. Hrt has made it easier although I have had a couple of panic attacks in the middle of the night. For some odd reason I've also become quite claustrophobic, it came from nowhere as it's not somethings that's bothered me before. Hormones eh ;D
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on April 17, 2018, 11:20:21 AM
Dulciana -I know what you mean about being outside of yourself.  I want to switch off my head!   When I am working/busy with others, it all goes.  But I miss my relaxed downtime - as soon as it gets an opportunity, my anxiety monster pounces, bringing with it a myriad of physical symptoms that then become real as my stomach gets anxious and then acts up.

I feel like a total nutter.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: CLKD on April 17, 2018, 11:34:54 AM
You are not though, otherwise we all are ;-)
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on April 21, 2018, 09:58:32 AM
Quick update.  Have had trapped wind/stomach bloating issues for around four weeks now.  Last week they went away to be replaced with bladder pain - like I need to go all the time but don't really.  I've had this a couple of times before but never related to the IBS type symptoms.  I'm also very bloated.  I've now discovered that this type of bladder is often related to IBS... :(
It is irritating as I am now longer anxious in my head [if you know what I mean] but think the anxious months have just wrecked my digestive system.

I've also found out via the lovely Hurdity's posts elsewhere that the different oestrogen I took for the last three months because my progynova was out of stock [eleste solo] is a completely different type and gives more oestrogen.  So at last I have confirmation that oestrogen perhaps fuels, rather than eases, my anxiety.  So I'm going to taper off the HRT gradually over the next six months and see how that is.  Can't be any worse!!!
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: Snoooze on April 21, 2018, 10:07:58 AM
When my ibs flares up it presses on the bladder.

Out of interest have you had your Vit D levels checked? Low vit D can cause digestive issues. I found when I took supplements my ibs improved.
Title: Re: Vicious anxiety cycle is off again...
Post by: rebel2 on April 21, 2018, 10:16:23 AM
Thanks Snooze - I'll check that out at the GPs next week.