Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: 4meSons on November 20, 2017, 11:42:28 AM
-
Why can't I cry ? I can't remember the last time I did and I wish I could to release some of this tension :'(
I'm having a crappy day following on from a crappy week following on from etc etc I'm sure you get the picture. I feel so overwhelmed and I'm scared ladies I don't think I can go on like this. I don't know what else to do ? I'm on Ad's and started hrt but I'm mentally and physically exhausted after 3 long long years
What the hell is wrong with me ???
-
Hello 4meSons,
Sorry to hear that you are having such a crappy time....really feel for you.
Am also in a similar situation as you.....struggling massively!!!
Just wanted to respond to your message by sending you comforting hugs and really hope that you will be better soon.
Take care, Bj xxx
-
I'm on Anti-depressant medication and rarely cry even when I need to. Unless of course, Himself is sitting beside me and I'm watching something soppy ::). Is there any music that sets you off? I have several tunes that are guaranteed ......
-
I had the same thought a while ago that I can't cry anymore. I do tear up when I'm watching something sad etc but I can't remember the last time I cried. It's like my emotions are switched off.
-
Thank you for the hugs bj and I'm sorry you are having a crappy time too. It's bloody awful this isn't it, is your all meno related? I struggle with the fact that this is all caused by hormones, mine must be in a right state to cause this much upheaval. :bighug: for you x
-
CLKD do you think it's the anti depressants stopping the tears?
I could try watching something sad but I struggle to watch anything at the moment.
-
Hi snoooze are you on Ad's by any chance too ? The only emotion I have is fear and worry. I have just recalled when I last cried it was in April when I had to have my dog put to sleep, I didn't think I would ever stop crying then :'(
-
No I'm not on AD's so just put it down to meno. I have always suffered with anxiety and that has increased during meno.
-
Yep. My feelings aren't muted in general but I haven't had a good blub for years ::). Even when Dad died 12 years ago ....... although I did shed a tear at an advert recently but can't remember which one :D
-
Well I know, for me, high oestrogen makes my emotions release very quickly and even small sad things make me have to swallow down the lump in my throat so I don't cry! I never used to be like that.
Hence, perhaps low oestrogen does the opposite and makes you unable to release the emotions? Then things build up so it will increase anxiety.
-
I think it's the ADs stopping you crying
I am a very emotional person and at the start of peri dr gave me ADs for IBS. During that I attended my bosses little girls funeral, she was 7, and my heart bled for the family. I felt so horrible as I had to be the only mourner not crying, I just couldn't she'd those tears x
-
Hello 4meSons.
I struggle to cry as well and like you wish I could as a tension release. I was never a big crier before the meno but the change in hormones has definitely had an impact.
Wishing you well.
K.
-
Really struggling today
Didn't sleep very well and the anxiety was there as soon as I opened my eyes. It's like a stalker and has followed me all morning. Sometimes it feels like it possesses my body and I feel I will go mad and get so agitated. The racing thoughts and what if's make my head hurt. This must be more than hormones I must have a severe anxiety disorder if even my meds are not helping. I just don't know what to do or where to turn next, I think I have come to a dead end :-\
-
How long have you been taken hrt? I’ve been told it could take 3 months to work x
-
Hi 4me sons.Its that dreaded anxiety or "fear" for me waiting on something to happen which it doesent but meantime your panic builds up and gets worse and worse as the minutes go on,I've beaten it! Well in my mind I have.ive got a Fitbit watch and I keep it on as much as possible and watch my heart rate and when this anxiety hits,usually right out the blue as we all know, I put my meditation app on my phone on and use the watch to monitor my pulse and heart rate and really focus on getting that down by using my breathing and it works,I don't take any meds at all for that side and I've just recently started back on HRT after a 5/6 year absence so I use every bit of help and advice I can get at the moment.I got the watch in a gift as I needed it for physio after a bad head injury caused by falling due to dizziness which I now know is another one of those 34 menopause symtoms we suffer from,keep persevering and questioning and you will overcome it trust me.good luck xx
-
I'm positive it's the AD's that are stopping you from crying 4mesons, as they numb you. What hrt are you on (sorry if you've already said) and maybe it's not suiting you and wants looking at/tweaking?
-
Hello again 4meSons.
I completely understand how you are feeling and I am experiencing the same thing myself atm. I have never been much of a crier but I've just come back from visiting a friend and we ended up sobbing into each other's arms. You are not alone in all this believe me!
Wishing you well.
K.
-
Thank you all for replying too me, it means a lot. I just worry it's not my hormones behind all this and it truly is me. I have had anxiety in the past but this just feels extreme and it's like my mind is searching for something to worry about if that makes sense. I have started CBT but to be honest I think it is not helping and making me worse.
I started hrt about 4 weeks ago gel + utro. I started on 1 pump then increased to 2. I wonder if I need more ? I also keep waking up during the night with a terrible headache, it feels like my brain has shrunk and dried up :o
-
Another bad night
Woke up at 4 and could feel my heart thumping in my ears, what's that all about.?
Decided to get up and had a cuppa (decaf). The anxiety seems to come in sort of waves by the minute. I am now back lying on the bed after just applying my gel and took an extra pregablin to relax me. I don't care if I feel zonked as I prefer that too anxiety.
I am thinking maybe I should put the hrt on hold for a few months to see where I am at and concentrate on getting my mental health stable. That may need a tweaking of my meds or even a change which I will probably need to see a psychiatrist for. I won't be back at work as soon as I thought cos quite frankly it is the last thing I need at the moment x
-
Hello again 4meSons.
I am having a similar time to you at the moment however as I felt pretty normal last week and positively well for about ten weeks before that, I am convinced it's hormonal. I will ask to have my thyroid tested when I see my GP, is this something you have considered? My husband is away so I plan to take a diazepam later and try and catch up on some sleep this afternoon. If it's any comfort I've been awake since 5am with flushes and internal shaking that also come in waves but so often it feels permanent.
I wish I could help you some more but you are not alone in your suffering, I am having exactly the same symptoms as you and I know how hellish it feels.
Sending hugs and take care.
K.
-
Don't give up on the hrt 4mesons. Hormones are precursors to our moods and I'm convinced if you can find one which suits you'll be much better placed to cope with the truly awful symptoms you are experiencing. It's only 4 weeks since you started hrt and received wisdom is to persevere with it for 3 months . Having said that and (I know from reading on here that lots of ladies have success with the gel), I tried it and preferred patches. In fact I got relief with them very quickly, and now I'm through the peri stage I'm feeling much better. But I have been where you are now and I'd hate to see you over medicated when there's a solution which is much better for you. Wishing you well x
-
Thank you both for your replies
It does help knowing there is someone listening. I've had anxiety for nearly 3 years now some days it's worse than others but it's there every morning without fail.
I am going to speak to doctor as the gel I was given is oestrodose which I have been using for a week , my previous one was for oestrogel which seemed better but I constantly question myself now. I'm so fed up of not being able to function properly. I'm now wondering if I would be better off on qlaira or pop as I have used oral and depo contraception in past with no problem x
-
A couple of things 4meSons. First how old are you? It could be that your anxiety coincided with becoming peri menopausal, if that's the case it's good news as it can treated with hrt. (This is exactly what happened to me). Also, your oestrogen will be very low and will account for your symptoms, so it may take a while for levels to build and then you should start noticing the benefits.
Secondly, I believe oestrodose isn't as good as oestrogel (there's a thread on it on here, look it up), so you are correct on this and it needs changing x
-
Sorry for feeling so sad! I'm crying all day, I wish to have the strength to go on with my life. I feel tearfull, depressive and hope things will change. :worm: :worm:
-
Peri I'm 48 and all this started in 2015. I just woke up one day full of adrenaline and it's been like that ever since. Every day some days worse than others. Sometimes it lasts a few hours but lately it's been all day again. I've never had anxiety like this before, I don't know what I'm anxious about apart from what the hell is wrong with me ! I've always been a nervous type when the situation warranted like interviews, dentists etc but this is above and beyond that type of anxiety. I've had ADs before after certain life events and they have worked within weeks with minimum side effects allowing me to get on with my life
I know the oestrodose is making me worse so I'm speaking to doctor for a new prescription for oestrogel tomorrow.
Is this really what happened to you ? And you feel ok now ?
Emerald2017 I too hope things will change for the better for both of us and all the other ladies who's life is being blighted by this x
-
Hello again ladies.
I also think that the anxiety we get with the menopause is very different from any anxiety we may have experienced before ( and who hasn't experienced anxiety at different times in their lives, it is a normal human emotion after all).
With the menopause I feel my mind and body is being flooded with chemicals and there can be no logical reason for it. It's like contractions during childbirth, they come as and go when they want to and there's nothing you can do but breathe through them and wait for them to pass. All very frustrating!
Wishing you all well.
K.
-
Hi 4meSons
Yes I had a difficult peri meno, which is when I found this forum and educated myself as to the different hrt's and options available. I trialled several types of hrt with varying degrees of success before I found the regime I'm on now (which has been the best one for me). Your timings do suggest your symptoms coincided with becoming peri menopausal. I also think meno makes everything worse and we have to employ a whole host of strategies to get through what can be a difficult time, especially if you're sensitive to hormonal fluctuations. I personally do the following: make sure I eat healthily (plant based diet), limit sugar, exercise, limit stress (I went part time), take B vitamins and omega 3, as well as use hrt patches and testosterone gel. This has worked for me and I'm back to my old self more or less. Don't give up I'm sure you'll find a way though, and good call on changing the gel btw x
-
Thanks again girls
Another day another anxiety with my stalker, I wish he would bog off. Not as bad as last 2 days tho just hope it stays this way .
This site has been a godsend. I only came across it while googling my symptoms I had never even heard of perimenopause. What you say peri does make sense in the timing of it all. I am eating much better since I found out I had type 2 diabetes. I don't seem to have the motivation for exercise at the moment, and I'm resting as much as possible probably too much as I'm off work. I am hoping to go back just part time. I just started taking magnesium, b6 and vit d. I've cut down on my cafiene. Hopefully all this will help me.
Kathleen how you describe the anxiety as contractions is spot on. It just sort of appears like waves.
I am speaking to doctor at teatime so I'm looking into a different oestrogen. I like the gel but if it's going to be a problem and I keep getting oestrodose then it's no good. I am thinking of an evorel patch with my utrogestan but not sure what strength I need. In the peri stage do you need more or less ? Will 50 be suffice x
-
Yes 50 is an average dose and is equivalent to 2 pumps of gel I believe. Fingers crossed it works for you, let us know how you get on x
-
Spoke to GP and she issued me a new prescription, so I took it to chemist with the oestrogel and they have ordered it for me for tomorrow. I'm hoping after a few days use I will feel much better
Oh the doc did say I could increase up to 3 pumps
-
I accept that I don't cry due to my anti-depressant medication but I NEVER want to feel that ill again and don't feel that in general, my emotions are dulled at all. I know that there are a few pieces of music and the end of a film that will set off tears if I feel that my brain is bogged down.
If the HRT doesn't ease your anxiety then ask for the appropriate medication!