Menopause Matters Forum

Menopause Discussion => Alternative Therapies => Topic started by: CLKD on January 12, 2016, 07:28:59 PM

Title: "Havening"
Post by: CLKD on January 12, 2016, 07:28:59 PM
Someone has put a leaflet through our door : 'self-havening' techniques

Anyone have any experiences? It supposedly helps one relieve distress i.e. anxiety …… a kind of DIY touching therapy .  I think that I'm too far down the line for it to be of benefit …...
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Taz2 on January 12, 2016, 08:17:19 PM
It's for people who have suffered trauma rather than just anxiety I thought. Maybe it's moved on though from the original purpose?

Taz x
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: CLKD on January 12, 2016, 08:26:08 PM
The web-site isn't very clear  ::) ……… Can you imagine me having a panic attack in the middle of a supermarket beginning to tap myself then I have to find stairs to run up and down whislt counting quietly ………  ::)

Maybe the brown paper bag might be more suitable  :-\
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Taz2 on January 12, 2016, 08:50:13 PM
Paul McKenna does it apparently https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/brain-myths/201305/can-the-new-havening-technique-really-cure-trauma-and-fear

Taz x
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Dorothy on January 12, 2016, 10:00:00 PM
The web-site isn't very clear  ::) ……… Can you imagine me having a panic attack in the middle of a supermarket beginning to tap myself then I have to find stairs to run up and down whislt counting quietly ………  ::)

Maybe the brown paper bag might be more suitable  :-\

If you start tapping yourself and running up and down stairs in a supermarket, you may find onlookers phoning for the men in white coats!  It doesn't sound like a very practical method to use in public  ;D
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: CLKD on January 13, 2016, 02:54:03 PM
 ;D ……… Paul McKenna is the only 'name' that I recognise  :-\

As I've been doing similar for over 30 years and it ain't helped yet ……..  ::)
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Dulciana on January 14, 2016, 10:29:06 PM
I read that as "havering"!   (Used a lot up here, to mean babbling on about nothing)    Then I was even more confused when I thought I read "self-havering"!  I though to myself, I've been doing that for years.  Why aren't I any better?   Then I noticed it was an "n".............. ::)
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Dorothy on January 14, 2016, 10:34:01 PM
 ;D  Dulciana, I don't know if havening would make me feel better or not, but having roared with laughter at your 'self havering' post, I'm feeling great.  Laughter really is the best medicine  ;D
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Dulciana on January 14, 2016, 10:36:29 PM
 ;D

D.
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: CLKD on January 15, 2016, 06:16:51 PM
better than self heavering  :o

can't see how it would help me, as panic attacks can happen anywhere and at anytime  >:(
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Ju Ju on January 16, 2016, 12:42:09 PM
Oh Dulciana!  :rofl:

I'm good at havering too!

I'm fortunate that I don't suffer from anxiety or panic attacks, except on escalators in wide open spaces or on those long deep escalators in the underground stations in London. I'm that mad, sweating and hyperventilating woman clutching, or rather cutting off the blood circulation of the arm of whoever I'm with! I usually cope by avoidance. I look for lifts and stair ways in shopping malls. No phobia is going to stop my retail therapy! But I have found myself in difficult situations in London. Last time, when I found the lift locked,  I asked a kindly looking family to let me stand between them on the escalator. They were wonderful and as kind as they looked. There are some lovely people out there.
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Nicci on March 03, 2016, 10:08:11 PM
I have anxiety which sometimes can reach a stage whereby rather than experience the panic I just don't bother going out...'cause let's face it, most supermarkets do home delivery so me and mine won't starve or go without but the above is just a safe, avoidance tactic and doesn't really address or get to the root of my fears. (Working on the premise that if I don't know what's broke, I can't fix it)

I'm too twitchy for Yoga, my co ordination is too 'pants' for Tai Chi -(...and I usually end up bursting into tears which I've been assured means it's working but in a room of twelve silent people I'm the only puffy, red-eyed one with a face covered in tears and snot so I felt too self conscious to go back)  ::)  I can't sit still or stay focused enough to meditate alone. I get distracted when trying Qui gong so in my desperation to switch off and get a break from being constantly anxious I tried a Reiki session.

That was four weeks ago. I've had more Reiki treatments and sessions since (one a week)  I'm more scientific than spiritual however; being lay on a warm, comfy holistic practitioners bench/couch thing, in a warm, soothing room with quiet, gentle music and nothing required of me whatsoever other than to lay there and actually relax while all of 'the work' so to speak is being done for me...well, who wouldn't, right?

How is this helping me calm myself in a practical sense?, ie. Being out and about and finding myself in that all too familiar 'fight or flight' situation? The more Reiki I've had the easier it is to bring to mind and focus on the calm, warm sense of well-being or at least the memory of feeling balanced, safe and capable which in turn is enough for me personally to interrupt my own thought process (before it escalates) - which I haven't been able to do before now.
So if like me you haven't been able to get the hang of the more well known, alternative forms of self help for anxiety and stress and you'd like one stress free hour per week just for yourself with nobody mythering you. Find yourself a reputable Reiki Master and try it....what have you got to lose?
X

Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: CLKD on March 04, 2016, 05:14:34 PM
 ??? money  ???  :-X
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Nicci on March 07, 2016, 04:10:54 AM
 :) true.
(I've spent more on things that haven't helped)
Each to their own perhaps?
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: CLKD on March 07, 2016, 02:01:20 PM
It's difficult to over-come anxiety - once it hits it floors me  :'(
Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: Nicci on March 07, 2016, 06:18:19 PM
 :bighug:  @CDLK
I can empathise CDLK. I quit my job and wouldn't leave the house...not even for the hozzy when my chest and triceps muscles constricted and I'd convinced myself that 'this is it'. I'm going to die. ( At the extreme end of one particular anxiety meltdown.)  It took me the best part of four days solid self imposed bed rest to recover from the physical and mental effects of that one. It wiped me out.
It's soul destroying to completely lose our identity to fear  :'(
It can affect almost every part of our daily functioning. I've heard it said that hope is a stronger emotion than fear...and I'm starting to believe it.

Sending you huge hugs xx


Title: Re: "Havening"
Post by: CLKD on March 07, 2016, 08:02:10 PM
Well thank you!  I felt for years that I would never go shopping or be 'normal' again  :'(.  Which is why my GP prescribed BBs as well as an emergency 'as necessary' tablet.  (Lorozapram? )