Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: karenja on September 20, 2014, 06:54:24 AM
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Hi I have posted about my anxiety so much I'm driving myself mad!but it's taking over my life I've stopped doing things, even now my chest is tight as I had a panic attack in the night- I'm going back yet again to gp but so reluctant to take anyi depressants or beta bloc or Valium, I'm on hrt patches which have helped flushes and night sweats at least! Had anybody found any help for their anxiety apart from taking medication? I know cbt and no more pain site hax been mentioned and I've got a drawer full of information on dealing with anxiety and tried the 321 excersise but still suffering! Just glad I've found this site and I'm not alone with these symptoms - gp's I my practice don't seem too familiar with anxiety being a menupause sympto
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Morning karenja! I know exactly how you feel! My anxiety came along with completely out of the blue along with loads of other symptoms, just when I thought that I should have been done with menopause!
The trouble is, it's completely out of your control, you have nothing to be anxious about, so you can't rationalise it and stop the feelings, it's as though something has taken over your body. Deep abdominal breathing really helps, and releases the tightness in the chest, but I found as soon as I moved, or thought about doing anything, the anxiety shot straight through me again! I am sure that the anxiety is the main cause of all the other symptoms like tingling in hands and feet, foggy thinking, loss of concentration, IBS etc., all can be linked to generalised anxiety.
I took Sertraline, which really helped, takes about 6 weeks to really make a difference but once you start not feeling anxious, the rest of you calms down. Our bodies get so worn out with the anxiety I think. Sertraline is one of the better AD's as it is non addictive. Other ladies may not agree and suggest non-medication, but it did help me.
I do feel for you, it is a vicious circle, you are anxious because you are anxious!
But you are not alone, it is the biggest subject on this forum!
Big hug WANDERER XXX
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So if you won't take medication to ease symptoms how do you expect to get relief?
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thank you Wanderer, its comforting knowing Im not alone and I know Im not just reading posts on here, CLKD Im just scared of anti depressants as I had a bad experience with them, but I have been advised there is a different kind of ad that may not have as bad side effects, so will mention that to the doctor, I was just hoping somebody would have experience of maybe taking something herbal that has helped that's all x
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Snap I'm having anxiety symptons too just started having CBT have you tried it ? :-* Xx
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If herbal or alternatives worked they would be available on the NHS!
All medications are liable to have side effects so it really can be Trial and Error, I found that out in the 1990s :'(. But my GP and I worked together until we found something which works to lift the depression, some mornings I wake 'hung over' but generally the relief from depression is enormous. I take 5mg in the morning and 5mg at night. The anxiety is dealt with by taking a betablocka at night, if necessary adding 1 extra dose in the morning.
If anxiety cripples me then I have an 'emergency' drug to take. I used to wait to see if I could 'work' through the anxiety but decided after 3 bad episodes to take it immediately, then sit quietly until it began to kick in.
I had been OK for several years with ADs and BBs, 2 years ago I had to crawl to the GP as I was unable to cope (DH was away …… long story short ::) ) and again when we bought the camper van, I had terrible attacks of crippling anxiety which left me curled up in a ball in the corner :'(
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I've been on Citalopram for about four months now and it's fine - although I'm not anxiety-free, I certainly cope a lot better than before, and apart from the first week (which was difficult), I've had no side effects. I tried betablockers but they make me feel awful - tired and heavy.
If you don't want to go the AD route, try Rescue Remedy - it really does help but it only works for an hour or so (good for exams and interviews!).
5HTP and St John's Wort also work but are really only for mild anxiety.
If there are specific things that make you anxious, you could try hypnotherapy.
I had a few sessions of CBT which I found useful but it takes work!
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CBT didn't help me. My issues were too deeply engrained :-\ ……..
Tabbycat …. :thankyou: ………. Rescue Remedy can be useful too, I had forgotten. There are mouth sprays, pastilles ……..
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What about meditation. It help some people. There is lots of books and DVD/CDs. Could be worth a try.
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I think that the thing about anxiety is its individual.
What bothers some does not others. Mine is mostly health related. if I feel reasonably well then I cope. I have IBS and am terrified of being caught short. I get light headed and giddy, feel a bit faint and just want to be outside. I hate enclosed spaces, doctors surgeries , hospitals and dentist's. Add in emitophobia and you get the picture.
Others can be completely different.
I tried one AD and was very sick. I tried CBT...rubbish councillor.
What has helped me is beta blockers. The occasional diazepam and the understanding that none of the above have ever harmed me.
Once you get your head around that then you have made a huge step forward.
Depression for me is completely different. I am not depressed I am anxious.
Honeyb
x
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Thanks Honeybun. Some of your problems are also mine :'( :-\
Now: deep breathing. I was taugth to take a very deep breath in quickly through the nose: hold for 1, 2,3 then let out through the mouth very slowly. To begin with I was unable to hold the 1,2,3 but with practice I did manage. But it takes practice ………………… only do it 3 times otherwise the head gets 'light' ::)
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When I'm anxious I realise I am hardly breathing at all.
Breathe from the tummy and not the chest.
When I had problems driving I had an elastic band that I wore around my wrist.If I got really bad I pinged it...it focused the mind on something else. Very sad but it did work.
It's a hell of a thing anxiety.
Looking back I think I have been always been that way inclined but more able to cope when I was a lot younger.
I was fine until I lost my daughter. My world crumbled and anxiety started its very slow but progressive journey. Meno has just reduced my ability to cope.
Honeyb
x
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Hi so sorry to hear you lost your daughter hb that's awful and inderstandable that that has contributed to your symptoms :( - as for breathing I have been trying to breathe from the stomach and not the chest and have read you are meant to push your stomach out when you breathe in through your nose and in when you breathe out through your mouth which isn't easy go do sometimes I gets stressed out trying to do that and just use a paper bag and breathe in and out with that - I'm going to try and keep busy today hoping that will help as got tight chest already x
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Does anybody take to their bed if they are getting anxiety or any other horrible menopause symptoms, I very often just go to bed in the daytime on the weekend or go early in the evenings as try to sleep to stop feeling so awful us lack if sleep at night drains you x
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Breathing into the stomach does help, I do it automatically now I find it very hard to try and breath the "old" way, I just tried the old way and could feel a sense of panic coming over my body.
Lie on the bed close your eyes, both hands on your tummy and breath as if you are breathing right down into your pelvic floor, slow breaths and whilst doing so take yourself off on a mental journey to a happy place.
It's the breathing they use in yoga, but they make a roaring noise when doing it.
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Thanks karenja. My daughter died many years ago age five days old, but I know that changed me forever.
Don't go to bed. Face your day no matter how hard. Hiding from the world makes things worse.
Try reading Dr Clair Weekes books. They are a bit old fashioned but relevant.
Set yourself a little challenge and see how you do.
I hate shopping centres but yesterday I went with my daughter who needed stuff for uni. I did it. Not for long but I did and every time I achieve just a little thing it gets easier.
You have been feeling like this for a while now and from what you have said not once has anything really bad happened. If you can just accept these feelings and know they will pass then everything will improve.
Take care.
Honeyb
x
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I used to curl up on the settee when depressed/anxious. For weeks and weeks and ......... it was often the only good quality sleep that I got. Cats didn't mind ;). I knew it was avoidance but I had to allow the medication to begin working. I had a strict routine in the morning but after lunch I used to flat, 4.00 p.m. was my worst time - when the fear took a real hold.
My mind would race some days. Others I could do the relaxation therapy. Others I slept. I believe that if I need to sleep I should do so - or I feel hung over and sick anyway ;)
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Thank you both again I can't even imagine how is cope with all your help and advice x
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Finding what suits you today and not feeling guilty about your choice is important. If you had a head cold you would take medication and sleep. I find even now that not looking more than half a day ahead helps the anxiety. I also shop when it's quiet. I never allow the cupboards to run down so that I am never forced to shop 'today' - I can put it off until I am in control. I have also learned to say 'no' to things and allow myself to change my mind without worrying about 'letting others down'.
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Honeybun is must have been an awful time for you when you lost your daughter so sorry big hugs :-* anxiety is a funny thing it can take over people's lives :( It has mine sometimes holidays are the worst two three day breaks are enough for now . Trying CBT at the moment early stages at the minute xx
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Well Ive been to the doctor about palpatations, she listened to my heart said it seems ok and felt my pulse reasonably ok, I was wound about going as usual and having to talk about it, she checked ecg and confirmed it was fine (but if your not having palpatations when the ecg is carried out wont it be fine anyway??), she didn't suggest anything other than referring me to see a counceller (cant spell it) for the anxiety x
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Palpitations and ECG are 2 different issues ;)
Counselling can help. Discuss, decide, ditch. How long will you have to wait?
Relaxation therapy in the meantime!
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Hi CLKD
She didn't say how long I will have to wait, she did first of all suggest betablockers for the palpatations, then when I pointed out I have asthma she rechecked my records and said oh yes you cant have betablockers then, just as well I knew that it was a dr Ive seen rarely before, I could only see whoever was available today, I just experienced the thump that felt like my heart was jumping out, ectopic heartbeat is it called? scary, but the doctor does not seem worried apart from recommending councelling, so what can you do x
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Ring the Dept and ask how long you will need to wait. Your GP should have told you >:( ……. in the meantime, begin deep breathing exercises 10 mins every hour? Sit quietly. When do you feel the worst?
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Hi my anxiety is usually worst in the evening, through the night or first thing in the morning, usually if ive had panic attacks in the night I know next day will be bad for me, the palpatations which Im getting more and more tend to happen any time, I can be watching tv, walking up a hill, in work sat at my desk, no specific time really, Im getting increasingly worried there is a problem with my heart or something it sounds silly but I guess part of the anxiety is health anxiety and when you are suddenly experiencing things you never had before it can be frightening, to be honest I think just being on the hrt stresses me out with the risks with that but I know that the benefits can outweigh these too Ive read so much on it and had advice on here, I will ring the surgery tomorrow and keep deep breathing x
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love the cat pic by the way X
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One has to decide whether to feel ill for the rest of our life or take the very small risk i.e. HRT. Have you read the menus, left of screen? After all we could get run over by a bus 2-morrow ::) ……. I would rather have quality rather than quantity ……… which means that DH and I have a Life 2-gether again.
By evening I'm a different person because my commitments have been done. I have learned not to make decisions after 4.30 p.m. but to wait until next morning, otherwise I wake with a rush of anxiety and "Why did I say yes last night" :'( ………. anxiety can be high first thing: anytime after 5.00 p.m. : and eases off as the day goes by.
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Monday will be challenge for me Im getting a train to go and get my teeth whitened Im going on my own its about an hour away, I hope its a good day for me x
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It's so hard but you really need to force yourself to do little things every day - if you feel anxious and do it anyway it's a good thing! I went through exactly the same thing but cbt helped me enormously - I now do nearly everything I want to whereas I was virtually housebound 2 years ago! Feel the fear and do it anyway...... It DOES get better!!
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It can improve. But 'feel the fear and do it anyway ' :-\ ...... when fear strikes I'm on the floor, shaking in a corner. NO WAY out without medication.
I try to eat before my body becomes hungry which helps to stop that lurch. I shop when it is un-likely to be busy so no joining long queues. I go out and about on impulse and not when it's planned and if I have to plan, make sure I have an exit strategy.
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Thanks it's good to hear things can get better and have - I got palpatations today whilst sat listening to somebody giving a talk in work why does it just happen like that it passed of course but it scary x
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It is scarey because we have no control. Also I worry about if others will notice or whether I will have to leave therefore disturbing people ::). It is finding a way of coping and each of us deals with these issues differently.
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Making yourself cough can sometimes stop the palpitations.
Nearly always works for me.
Honeyb
x
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Oh do tell more ............ bending over to cough or up-right? A bit like scaring someone with hiccups :-\
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Just cough CLKD. Trey explained why at one point but i can't remember what she said ::)
My doctor told me it would help.
A glass of wine works too but I don't fancy that with my corn flakes.
Honeyb
x
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You have the wine, I'll eat the flakes ;D ..........
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And we can both cough ;D
Honeyb
x
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:lol:
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your replies made me smile ;Dx
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:-[ phew, I was beginning to wonder if we had hi-jacked your thread …….
How has 2-day been? I am due to book 2 lots of holidays and my gut is wobbling away >:(
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It's good to have a laugh.......after all if we didn't ::)
Honeyb
x
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Hi Karenja
I feel for you, I hate taking medication as my own family were on tabs for years, but it may only be temporary and it really does help. Citalopram does help with anxiety and it is not addictive my gp said, I have succumbed to increasing mine to 20mg and I don't regret this, it has helped my anxiety a lot.
I just need these flushes to go... my evorel patches stopped these as I said in a recent message I sent on this forum but for under 2 weeks I stopped them and now the patches do not seem to help as they did ?
Hazel
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The medications prescribed years ago were totally different to what GPs suggest these days ;)
My anxiety is back this morning :'(
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Does anybody take to their bed if they are getting anxiety or any other horrible menopause symptoms, I very often just go to bed in the daytime on the weekend or go early in the evenings as try to sleep to stop feeling so awful us lack if sleep at night drains you x
I was doing that but I ended up waking up feeling even worse.
I don't blame you for not wanting to try antidepressants, doctors say they are not addictive, but they do have what they call a discontinuation syndrome, on other words, withdrawal.
You only have to look on the antidepressant forums to see the victims of pharmecutical meds.
Have you heard of a supplement called trypotphan.
A doctor once told me that the nhs prescribe this.
I cannot take it as I am on trazodone and the two interact.
My trazodone doesn't work for depression but the night time dose relaxes me.
It's just the daytimes I struggle with.
I hate waking up hot and anxious, I feel I should be able to start my day in the way a new day is supposed to be started, by welcoming it in, not dreading it.
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Yep - many medications need a period of withdrawal ......... including ADs. It took 9 weeks for me to wean of one type. But I did and I survived though there were times I thought I would have to begin taking them ::). Now I know how the weaning off period works, I won't be as worried should I need to do so in future.
There are not many people who are addicted to ADs whatever you read on the 'net. One drug in recent years (19990s) when new was prescribed and there is a Law Suite going through. But not many people are, usually there are other factors involved i.e. other substances or Doctors not being supportive to a weaning phase.
I hate waking up anxious too, did so this morning and my stomach is still rolling. I ate a lot of 'tablet' last night ......... too much sugar perhaps followed by Very Busy Dreams ........ I have been through periods of dreading going to sleep due to bad dreams, dreading getting out of bed, not being able to stay in bed :-\
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Hi update a few days with some odd symptoms as usual chest pains, achy legs, but they pass, no panic attacks and no palpatations today first time in ages, hope its getting better I can only hope x
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Yep - many medications need a period of withdrawal ......... including ADs. It took 9 weeks for me to wean of one type. But I did and I survived though there were times I thought I would have to begin taking them ::). Now I know how the weaning off period works, I won't be as worried should I need to do so in future.
There are not many people who are addicted to ADs whatever you read on the 'net. One drug in recent years (19990s) when new was prescribed and there is a Law Suite going through. But not many people are, usually there are other factors involved i.e. other substances or Doctors not being supportive to a weaning phase.
I hate waking up anxious too, did so this morning and my stomach is still rolling. I ate a lot of 'tablet' last night ......... too much sugar perhaps followed by Very Busy Dreams ........ I have been through periods of dreading going to sleep due to bad dreams, dreading getting out of bed, not being able to stay in bed :-\
Ohhh that sounds awful. I can sort of empathise, because although I like going to sleep, i fear it because of waking up. Waking up freaks me out.
Did you get withdrawal symptoms of your antidepressant tablets?
I know loads of people who have had a bad time coming off them, even when tapering off 10% a month.
I just take off small bits when I taper, but I have always been on other meds beside the one I am tapering from so maybe that made it easy for me.
Do you take HRT?
Dunno if this is accurate, but to me, I think the members who get anxious are those who are either not on hrt or are on one that doesn't suit them.
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My HRT suits me. It controls flushes and palpitations and helps a bit with insomnia.
My anxiety started two years after I began taking HRT.
It just doesn't help but really that's not what it's designed for. I have always been a bit nervy. It's just meno has reduced my ability to cope the way I used to.
HRT for me, and many others I think is not perfect but good enough so we don't have to cope with flushes and sweats.
Honeyb
x
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My HRT suits me. It controls flushes and palpitations and helps a bit with insomnia.
My anxiety started two years after I began taking HRT.
It just doesn't help but really that's not what it's designed for. I have always been a bit nervy. It's just meno has reduced my ability to cope the way I used to.
HRT for me, and many others I think is not perfect but good enough so we don't have to cope with flushes and sweats.
Honeyb
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Not all HRT gets rid of flushes and sweats.
I am on 2mg of femoston sequi and I still get lots of flushes and sweats during the day, plus night sweats in my upper body.
Maybe hrt is over rated as mine is useless.
I am sorry you have bad anxiety since meno.
I feel more vulnerable since peri as I don't cope as well with things and I wasnt the strongest person to begin with
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Hi just read this thread and thought I would add my recent experience with Anxiety.
I started HRT at 51, I am now 55 I have been feeling really stressed with everyday life, so much so I gave up my dream job 4 weeks ago because I couldn't cope. Since finishing and over the last week I have turned into a nervous wreck, and a feeling i'm losing control. I can't stand in a quey without getting agitated, im snapping at my husband who has told me it's like living with a time bomb who can explode anytime. I get this feeling in the middle of my tummy like intense butterflies (panic) with a feeling im about to lose control.I have racing irrational thoughts...... sooo scared!
I hate the way I am and imagine it will not belong before I'm taken away.
thanks for reading W :(
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I was an anxious child due to my home situation and it stayed with me all my life, a 'what if' people pleaser due to my upbringing. I also have thyroid issues which became less stable at menopause as I was warned they would.
I do find that my anxiety comes in waves, I can be ok for weeks and then it will hit me usually after an intensely busy or stressful event, as though my adrenaline levels shoot up and then get stuck and can't come down. I have been like this for the last 5 weeks. I know it will come to an end again but it is a horrible experience at the time as a lot of you know, a constant jitteryness and a feeling of doom.
I am not being flippant but if I can manage it a brisk walk with my dog can help as I think it uses up some of the spare adrenaline.
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When I am busy particularly in an 'emergency' situation, adrenaline keeps me going. That's what the hormone is designed to do. However, if I forget to eat properly which is easy for me, the anxiety kicks in and 'gets stuck'. I'm facing some alterations to routine this next few weeks so I am aware of the area around my tummy button which is where it centres for me :'( :-\
When I withdrew from 1 AD I did it over 9 weeks with support from my GP. Each time I took less the anxiety returned, I was curled up in a ball on the settee for 2 days - then as my body got used to lack of the drug, I felt better for the next few days until I took less.
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CLKD you have made me think so thank you for your comment. I was very busy with our daughter's wedding for weeks leading up to and including the event. I was on the go and sometimes forgot to eat. I lost 8lbs in weight over three months and my appetite went right down as a result and I found it difficult to eat. I wonder if this could have contributed to my current anxiety relapse. I am eating better now but with a history of an eating disorder I quite like the weight loss and am reluctant to put it back on :-\
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Glad to be of assistance. Eating before you feel hungry can help. I know how HARD it can be to begin proper eating - do you have 'safe' foods? We use pancakes; lightly stir fried chicken with boiled rice; toast ………. to try to encourage me. Also chocolate milk shakes, dried cream crackers, hot Bovril ….. anything that I don't have to think about and which is nourishing. I tried Complan once :beaurk: ;D
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I'm a 'little and often' eater anyway its just the often bit seems to have got lost just now. You have caused me to look at what I am doing and I am grateful, thank you.
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:bighug: ………
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I thought about this while I walked the dog just now and realised my anxiety feelings are similar to low blood sugar (mum was diabetic). Now I am wondering if it is bad at the moment because my body is trying to put back the lost weight as I am under my 'normal' weight. Now my body and mind are in conflict because I like being lighter but realise it is not good for me and I don't actually look as good because my face is long and thin and I have a turkey neck. Oh dear I really have to think about this :-\
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You can ask some pharmacists to check your blood sugar if you are concerned.
I don't think it's how much you eat but what you eat. Small portions of slow release foods are better than empty calories. You should be able to maintain your current weight whilst still eating nourishing food if that's what you want.
I am not tall so every extra pound looks like two. I have to work very hard to find a balance between keeping my weight below 9 stone and actually eating enough to keep me healthy. I don't think I get it right quite s lot of the time though as I lack in energy and that could be the cause.
We do have rigidly tight mealtimes which does not help but I have no options there as hubby has type 1 diabetes.
He has to eat the right stuff at the right time but I'm sure my stomach has shrunk over the years and a lot of time I'm just not hungry. Also being anxiety sufferer does not help as when your stomach is in knots putting food in is the last thing you want.
Honeyb
x
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Don't take any notice of BMI charts, they have been reviewed in recent years ::) - if I went by 'mine' I would be 2 stone underweight.
So: slow release foods; little and often; eat whilst walking the dog; keep well hydrated; graze ........ I find that when I can't eat much chocolate buttons help, comforting as they melt in the mouth ;)
I know if I'm lazy with exercise because my jeans feel tighter - I rarely weigh so that when I do it's a nice surprise. I felt really heavy a few weeks ago, well I stepped onto the scales and I was below 8 stone .......... where I want to be without trying ;)
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Gosh that's light CLKD ?.
I have to work really hard to stay about 8st 9 . I'm 5ft 1 so it is within acceptable range. Not easy though.
Honeyb
x
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I am 5ft 4 and was 10st 3 but am now 9st 10. Not a bad weight but I feel less well since I dropped the half stone. Thanks for the advice :)
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I am 5foot 1" tall ;) ........ the lowest I went down to was 5st 7lb in 1971. When I married I was 7st 2 and stayed there for ages++. Even though I had anorexic tendancies. We walked a lot, I was skinny - looking back at the photos ::) - but healthy-ish. When my dog was ill I went to almost 9st as I stopped walking her. It took 2 years to get back to 8 and a half, I borrowed the neighbours' puppy ;D.
You may feel 'less well' because your body is hungry ......... can you explain 'less well'?
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This weight thing is difficult.
I'me 5' 6" - I weighed 9st at my lowest ever, looked gaunt, people (not OH) said I'd lost too much weight.
9st 10lb is my "fighting weight" not fat not skinny, but that was 10 years ago.
Currently 10st 10lb - that's with taking Gabapentin for pain control - renowned for weight gain.
But I seem to feel ok, possibly less anxious, as well.
I'me going for pain control at the moment - may help with anxiety as well............
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My goodness there are a few of us littlies on here - I'm 5 foot 1 as well but CLKD and honeybun you make me feel fat!! I am 9st 4 - OK I do need to lose a few pounds but I know I do not look fat though! I struggle to keep my weight down and if it gets below 9 st I am happy. If I'm 8st 12 I look quite slim. I have a medium frame though because I looked skinny at age 18 when I was 8st 8, so it's not that much to put on - and I'm not going to get anxious about it! Also if I was back to that size my face would look terrible - well neck anyway. Always make sure I go no higher than this, and refuse ever to buy bigger jeans so it's fine!
I know about that weird low blood sugar thing - it makes me desperate to eat so I can imagine if it was often like that you would feel anxious.
Hurdity x
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When I got married I was 8st 2. When hubby met me I was working in an industrial catering kitchen and was 7st 4..I was far too thin. Gave up the heavy work and put on some weight.
I was the same weight at the start of three pregnancies and put on so much weight but walked it off.
Although I am quite slim all my excess has settled around my middle.
I keep complaining to hubby but he is much the same. 6ft and 11 stone with the excess around his middle.
It's middle age spread and it would seem short of starving myself mother nature will have its way.
Honeyb
x
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I just want to offer hugs to all those on this thread who are suffering anxiety.
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:thankyou: I have a 'lot on' in the next few months so it's creeping around my gut again ......... the anxiety not the weight, I have noticed that I have middle aged spread >:( i.e. lazy muscle :-X
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Anxiety is no joke I've been a little better until yesterday it's back I'm on the last week of the everol sequi this is my second month (haven't had Bleed should i worry? ) just feel anxious agai and been having little nightly things I don't know if related psi at back of head or in my left hand side yesterday and a bit in my chest today sometimes these things come on then go but if your anxious you worry! X
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Problem is with anxiety we notice everything that we would normally brush aside, it's like being in a creaky house you don't hear anything all day but when you go to bed and it is silent, you hear every squeak and creek.
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It is the worst feeling. I've was awake all of last night sweating and shaking with anxiety. My husband thinks I'm insane. This is all because I have to have a hysteroscopy under GA. I'm convinced there is something serious wrong with me. I can't think straight. My heart races. My blood pressure is up. It's terrible. I sympathise with everyone on here who suffers with this. I don't want anti depressants either but it is all they seem to offer isn't it?
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If I am supposed to undergone medication intervention my GP will give me Valium or similar to ease panic attacks, without which I would be in a hole in the ground by now ………. I agree MaryJane - as my anxiety levels rise I notice more 'about' me ……….. :-\
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If I am supposed to undergone medication intervention my GP will give me Valium or similar to ease panic attacks, without which I would be in a hole in the ground by now ………. I agree MaryJane - as my anxiety levels rise I notice more 'about' me ……….. :-\
How wonderful that your GP understands. Mine won't give anything to calm me down. I have asked for Valium but they refuse.
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My anxiety makes me worry that I'm always offending people, worrying about people not answering my emails or texts because I think I've annoyed them or offended them. Usually turns out I haven't, but I go through absolute agonies until they get back to me or I talk with them again. Does anyone else find this happens to them??
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It used to worry me but now I tend to get in touch with them to ask - usually they haven't noticed anything out of the ordinary!
If my GP didn't give me anxiety relief as required I wouldn't be here :'(
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Anxiety just sucks the joy out of life. Spontaneity goes, the ability to enjoy every day goes. Oh I could go on but you ladies know how it goes.
Just for one single morning, just to wake up and feel good and not have the tummy churning knot.
Not to have to look ahead and question if you can do the things you need or want.
Oh well, onward and flamin upward.....what's the choice.
I just get frustrated with me sometimes.
Honeyb
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I feel anxiety around and below my belly button. Can't describe the sensations though :-\ ………. then my head starts 'what if this doesn't go away' and then my legs get weak and my heads feels light :-X bug..r it :cuss:
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dulciana - I'm just like that! Exactly!
karenja - it could be the norethisterone building up in your system - it can cause these types of symptoms in some women - like pms/pmt perhaps? The withdrawal bleed should happen just after you stop the last combi patch and go back to the oestrogen only patch - when you might experience your usual pmt symptoms before the bleed. Some women get the bleed shortly before the end of the combi part, and some women don't get a bleed at all. It all depends where you are on the meno journey.
Hurdity x
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Hurdity - oh, poor you!! But it doesn't half help me to know I'm not alone in this. Thank you so much for posting - I feel able to look forward again. I hope sharing this might have helped you too. :foryou:
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Hi Honeybun
I know exactly how you feel, Im meant to take my mum to lunch today and have woke up feeling awful, and they I worry and that starts the anxiety, Im off work this week meant to relax but yesterday afternoon I had only been hovering and a hot sweat came over me and headache and I just felt awful (Im on last week of everol sequi) second month, so combined patch, I woke this morning feeling the same, Ive had a few good days prior, Ive also had no bleed as previously mentioned, but its put me off going out today as I don't know how Im going to be, it get you down :( x
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hi yeah im the same just thinking of having to go shopping etc i worry how im going to feel when im out it seems to be anything at the moment and it just takes the pleasure out of everything its so un fair you se people walking around doing things and being happy the only thing i can say is the mitrazraprine im taking have calmed me down but i hate taking them but for now i feel i have no choice all my friends are going out for meals etc but i just cant go and i know they dont understand you can tell the things they say but i have got to the stage where i wont put myself through it anymore i know its sounds like giving in but thats the way i feel vanessa spain xx
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These days, it really unsettles me if I don't get a reply back from folk I've contacted. The temptation to contact them again, to see if everything is all right, is hard to resist. But then I probably look pathetic if I try too hard to get a reassuring reply from them. Oh dear, am I the only one like this? ???
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Vanessa - do what you need to in order to stay calm and not have the awful anxiety surges. This part of our Life is when we take care of us and stop worrying about what others think ;) .........
Dulciana - it's you who is feeling sensative, they probably don't give you a thought until your next conversation, ;) , I am sure that folk aren't sitting there thinking about what you said, did etc.. I get over it by phoning or sending an e-mail ..........
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Yes, thanks for this advice, CLKD. You're absolutely right. Must try and pull myself together. (There should be a Smiley for that!) Oh Deary McLeary. I used to be sensitive but now I'm like a bubble waiting to burst. Even Hubby puts all this down to hormones.
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Have 1 of these :kick: ;) - sensitivity comes with the territory very often. A psychlogist once asked me 'why do you think that you are so important that everyone will be thinking about you?' that really hurt but she was probably 'right' ::)
Make the 1st move - ring/e-mail and start up conversation, people have their own worries so y/ours will be right down the list :D
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CLKD when I had CBT my psychotherapist said exactly the same thing and she was also right. People have far too much to be thinking about with their own lives to be thinking about me, it is a form of vanity to think everyone is bothered about me. In this respect I am very like my narcissistic grandmother and I am tryng oh so very very hard to be different because I don't want to end up like her. some of it also comes from my mother's constant mantra throughout my childhood of 'what will people think'? that taught me that people will be thinking............. ::)
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Karenja, you mentioned that you're off work this week. How does anyone manage to keep their job? I have missed quite a few days in the past 2 months, since this whole ordeal started. The anxiety attacks, feeling anxious, are so overwhelming at times. I dread getting in the car and driving to and from work. I am so glad I found this site because I was going crazy, feeling frustrated. This site reassures me I'm not the only one going through this and my symptoms are not unique, which I'm glad because we you mention to other people about your symptoms, they've never experienced, it's hard for them to understand.
I'm 43 years old and I started with these symptoms 2 months ago and my last bleed was 8 months ago.
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Hi Socalgal 14
It nice being off this week and Im glad as have had a few funny moments, but when Im working its hard some mornings I really don't want to go in, but I have to push myself as I cant loose the job as it pays the mortgage, Im sure others are in the same positon, since this started twice Ive had to call an ambulance, as I had panic attacks and palpatations and chest pains so bad I was terrified, even this morning I woke up sweating (hasn't happened for a while now twice in two days though yesterday It was after hovering, today Id woken up from sleep) I felt sick, headachy and then it escalates I think somethings wrong, somethings going to happen, I don't know what heart attack, stroke whatever, its the anxiety its really awful, this site is a godsend, to know that other people are going through the same things as you x
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Hello ladies.
I just wanted to chip in and say that I am also fed up with this whole anxiety business. Mine takes the form of feeling on edge most of the time, I then have panics when I think " Oh no, how will I cope with xyz when I feel like this". I also feel terrible in the mornings and find it very difficult to tolerate people. That's all people by the way, children, the elderly, teenagers, my husband ( sometimes especially my husband ). I used to be so amenable and now I feel irked all the time. Heartily sick of it...
Take care ladies, at least we have each other.
K.
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Babyjane: as we grow up how people view us is important: remember how we felt in our teens - boys/older people/teachers etc., we all need to be validated so being 'in' was important as we went through our growing years. Then if we move to a different area and have to begin over with neighbours/work colleagues/friends ……… we tend to do our best to be 'in' ……. old habits die hard ::).
Now I don't worry so much what people think. Although I did buy a jacket recently, wore it twice and felt good - however, DH told me yesterday he doesn't like it :D so it's gone to Charity …….. otherwise, what others think ::) ………. I also tend to say what I like ……….. means I have to weigh my words first though ;)
If you find you can't go out and about then don't. Putting ourselves under pressure for others: why do we do it? Others won't understand unless they have suffered anxiety attacks. If we had a cold etc. they would see it differently. If I am asked to do something, i.e. care for the neighbours' cats, I only say 'yes' if they have a back up ! in case ………..
It is difficult to manage. There is no way why a GP shouldn't prescribe Valium-type medication for emergencies - once I knew that the meds would work when necessary, I didn't need to grab for them!
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CLKD - you were absolutely right. Thank you so much for your earlier words, which stopped me making a twit of myself. It's all come out in the wash. I had absolutely nothing to worry about, it was all in my menopausal head and I can sleep well tonight. Me and my imagination! (Oh well, at least it's useful for music-making!)
:foryou:
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You are welcome. Does anyone have imaginary conversations in their heads when troubled :-\ - I go over and over what I would like to say in retaliation to what others have said/done and sometimes I get to respond :o
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It is so true that it's always worst in the morning. I'm seriously thinking about doing a career change. Even though another job will pay less, I don't need the stress. The stress is also contributing to the anxiety. I need to let it go and not worry so much about how the bills will be paid. Like my hubby says, God will provide. We can all make changes and still be okay. Health and sanity is what matters.
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Welcome Socialgirl - what skill base do you have, perhaps new thread?
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This morning anxiety is truly horrible. I wake with a feeling of impending doom. I worry so much about my son who become unemployed last week. Totally unexpectedly he was one of several who lost their jobs and had done nothing wrong. Seems so unfair. The thing is I feel almost hysterical with worry and wonder why hubby is quite rational! Going to work does help as I force myself to concentrate on what needs done and I work in a small friendly team.
This is not a pleasant time at all :'(
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Hi Anna
I know how you feel, again ive woken feeling very anxious, Im meant to go out to lunch, Im going to make myself go, it may help, hope you feel better as the day goes on good luck x
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Rescue Remedy really can help. I use the spray not the drops and have 4 sprays instead of the suggested 3.
I also use propranolol (a beta blocker) than my GP gave me. I am very sensitive to medication and I cut a 10mg tablet in quarters and have a quarter in the morning and the evening. This is only 2,5mg at a time. I think my GP is humouring me as he doesn't really think such a small dose will do anything for me but it really takes the edge off and helps me not over react to everything.
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I have propranalol too, was on 80mg slow release until July when I goy 40s then stopped. Now and again I cut one in half so it's 20 and take if needed. I have also cut it into quarters for 10 and it works, maybe placebo but hey if it does the job babyjane then carry on doc may well be humouring ;)
Karenja try enjoy your lunch hope you feel better soon
Anna hope you feel better soon too we have a tendency to make things worse in our minds
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You are welcome. Does anyone have imaginary conversations in their heads when troubled :-\ - I go over and over what I would like to say in retaliation to what others have said/done and sometimes I get to respond :o
yes I do this all the time...get myself all worked up needlessly, usually when I need to switch my brain off at bedtime grrr
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I find that if I have the 'head conversations' I am less likely to burst out with what I am really thinking!
I had to par back plans yesterday - we were going 'out for a meal' with friends but all week I've got more and more anxious about it so we met for a drink only. That worked ;) >phew< ……….
I have cut my 40mg Propranolol in halve as the full dose was make my head really tired every morning. 20mg at night and morning.
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Ye imaginery conversations in my head! Better that than saying it to people sometimes, saves the guilt of upsetting people
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well I went for a walk made myself, only 40 mins, with ten min stop at the shop, I felt ok until I stopped then felt strange but I don't know whether I did actually feel strange or I just wound myself up over the walk, when as I was getting near home I could feel chest pains, again prob nothing but it stressed me, since ive got in Ive got the second headache today, I don't know if its just anxiety or im back on the estrogen only Everol Patches now so is it progesterone withdrawal, this was mentioned previously, its awful when you cant even for for a walk without worrying something bad will happen x
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I know how you feel sometimes I am ok other days I feel so worried worked up and sad just good to know in a weird way I am not going nuts there are other lauds like me thank you all for sharing 8)
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Hello ladies.
I just wanted to send my sympathies to all the ladies who are struggling at the moment. I am also having a very anxious day today. The jitters are always there but they really ramped up around lunch time for no reason whatsoever ( I'm so sick of it that I've opened a bottle of red to see if that helps).
Best wishes to all and here's to a better day tomorrow. Cheers!
Take care everyone.
K.
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Kathleen - a little alcohol in moderation can do wonders for stress and anxiety! Too much can have the opposite effect especially during the night and the next day. I always find it makes me very mellow - I usually go for a glass of sherry before I eat in the evening - put on a CD while I'm cooking and it never fails to make me feel good and relaxed (or energised depending on the music!). Sometimes wine instead or as well but sometimes gives me migraine. In summer I have a G&T or a cool beer! By the way not every day!!
Hurdity x
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I want to book theatre tickets for Nov but everytime I think about doing so my stomach lurches :'(
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What you suggest is how it should be however: I found that 'friends' couldn't understand why I could do something one day but not another :'( so gradually walked away. It wasn't enough to say 'if I can I will' because I got 'but you did it last month/week/yesterday' …….. so if someone asks me to pet-sit I always insist that there is a back-up booked before I say 'yes'. That way it lessens the anxiety.
Don't know about HRT :-\
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Hi
I understand what you mean when you say friends don't understand they just don't, though they do try I suppose until they loose a bit of patience as I seem to say a lot I will have to see how I am cant commit at the moment, but this is how it is some days are good some bad, today bad, and the reason being, I wound myself up all night as storms were forecast and Im scared stiff of thunder and lightening when im on my own at night, I get this from my mother who used to hide in a cupboard its silly but as it happened there was only rain, but Im continually checking the weather as I know storms are due later this week again, Ive also started and this may sound even sillier but I keep thinking something is stuck in my throat or windpipe, I had some cashew nuts a few weeks ago and one didn't go down properly and despite drinking lots of water and eating bread (supposed to help I could feel it there for ages it scared me) now Im extra careful eating and still think on times something it stuck, is this an anxiety symptom I really think Im going mad on times :( x
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The lump in your throat is a classic anxiety symptom. I still have it off and on but just ignore it now as I know it will go.
I hope this makes you feel a bit better because you are not going mad, or if you are the rest of us are too ::)
Honeyb
x
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thanks honeyb that's good to know that im not alone in this, im having a camomile and honey tea now recommended by somebody in work to help me relax, tastes awful!! x
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Just wanted to say a big well done on taking that walk. You need to do it again and each time it will get a little easier. By walking you will burn up some of your adrenaline and it will ease your symptoms. When I was at my worst I literally dragged myself, crying, through my front door as I was convinced the exercise was going to kill me. I was so consumed with myself. It was the absolute best thing I ever done to help the anxiety xx
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When we eat something 'hard' which leaves the throat feeling as if something is stuck, it is often like a 'bruise' ……. the tender throat lining remains tender.
I currently have background anxiety ……….. >sigh<
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This thread is so reassuring and helpful, thank you to the original poster and everyone who has commented. I can't tell you how much better it has made me feel about myself :)
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Hi Babyjane,
I agree I cant say enough how glad I am that I found this site and can lots of questions and get answers from others going through exactly the same, it does make you feel better x
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Hi, bad couple of anxiety days, every ache in my leg or pain in my chest I think something bad is happening and still got tight chest feeling, also last few days waking up in the night with full bladder, then the next morning having to go back and fore the loo and even though I haven't drunk much still going a lot, so got to take urine sample in today as Ive suffered from urine infections in the past, when I had scan for this previously it was found out incidentally that I have sizeable fibroids, and I know hrt can increase the size of these so wondering if they are affecting this don't know or maybe just stress though I have never heard this as being a stress symptom. As ive been referred for councelling due to my anxiety I did ask the gp how long yesterday and apparently there is a three month waiting list so wont be seeing anybody anytime soon, oh well must push myself to get ready for work, hopefully things will get better as the day goes no, moan over for now :) x
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When I have a panic attack I wee every 10 mins………….. for hour after hour after …… are you able to ring the psychology dept to see if they offer cancellation appointments
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Hi CLKD
it was a urine infection on antibiotics now, had an awful few days anxiety wise, I know its silly but Im really scared of thunderstorms it comes from my mother who was also very scared, it was horrible here Wednesday night and I was sat on my stairs (don't ask why there) having an awful panic attack it took me ages to calm down I thought I would actually have a heart attack! I was so scared, eventually calmed myself down but Thursday in work it was still with me and I had to ask if I could go and sit in a room for a bit to try breathing, my chest was so tight, yesterday and this morning still uptight, so between the antibiotics making me drowsy and wanting to get away from the anxiety Ive slept half the day today, how are you doing x
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I may see if there is anybody I can chase regarding councelling as three months does seem a long time makes you realise how many people are going through it for different reasons x :'(
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The Government of the day are telling us that Mental Health services will improve and the longest wait for counselling will be 12 weeks - don't hold your breath >:(
I had to wait 18 months before I was considered for counselling …….. the Dept rang to see whether I still needed an appt…………….
Is there a MIND group close by?
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Not sure I will check x
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While you're waiting for your counselling maybe you could do a few self-help techniques to make you feel a bit better. There is really good information on this site http://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/anxiety.asp You can print it off as a booklet if you want which makes it easier to dip in and out of but it is well worth reading all the way through. You might find symptoms in there that you can identify with and just knowing that it is down to anxiety would ease your worrying maybe.
Taz x
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Thanks for that link Taz, I've just printed it off ;)
Libby
x
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Hope it helps!
Taz x
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thanks Taz I will have a look at that website x
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Bu…r it :-\
My anxiety began again on Wed.. Sudden dash to the loo after breakfast left my stomach feeling weak as though it hasn't any muscle power. Then my thighs went shaky but pressed on into town. Only to feel as though I needed the loo and I needed it now and in a strange place ……..
Of course every time I walked away from the public loos my bowel began to grumble >:(
Does anyone else find that when full of anxiety they can only use certain utensils? I can only drink out of certain mugs and there is 1 glass which I use all the while, when anxious/nauseous I can't consider drinking out of any others :-\ and the cutlery has to be certain pieces as does the crockery otherwise I can soon 'go off' the drink/grub which rather defeats the object ………. bu..er it :'(
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It's horrible needing the loo and not knowing if you are going to make it on time. I think you were very brave going out at all.
I'm fine with all the stuff in the house. The only time I'm very careful is when someone is unwell. Then it goes in the dishwasher immediately. Otherwise we sometimes kind of share ::)
Hope you settle soon CLKD
Honeyb
x
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:thankyou:
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Sorry to hear your anxiety has been bad clkd I'm happy to say I've had a few really good days but was on estrogen only patches back on conti today do had a few funny little symptoms I'm coming up to end of my three months on patches now so may make sppointment with gp decide whether to stick with them - anxiety is awful it really gets u down and stops you doing so much :( x
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I sympathise with you both, and anyone else suffering with this. I am going through a patch of it just now and although I know it will pass it seems to take over and get in the way of everything as well as making you feel quite unwell.
Yes, I need certain cups and plates and cutlery for certain times of the day and occasions. I think it is for a feeling of security when you do not feel secure.
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This is an interesting post re using certain cutlery etc. http://ask.metafilter.com/172769/I-swear-the-cheescake-tastes-better-with-this-fork
It's well known that OCD can be controlled but raises it's head once anxiety gets a grip so maybe this is what's happening to you at certain times CLKD?
Taz x :hug:
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I am obsessional but the issue of using the 'right' stuff is when my anxiety is bad. Can't really explain it :-\
It certainly makes me feel ill, the physicality of it shocks me each time!
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I was only thinking this morning, after reading some of your posts CLKD. that this anxiety problem is very much a physical one, well it is for me. I was trying to explain to my daughter last night that it is not a mental problem with me. It feels as though a switch goes on and then goes off again and I am rational and lucid but have no control over what I am getting worked up about.
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Mine begins in the area of gut below the belly button. Within seconds the nausea begins. Then I get lightheaded and my thighs become weak. Then my brain starts saying 'you must eat, you must eat' ….. but I know that I won't be able to. I carry Dextrose tablets with me ……. which helps keep some energy. But facing food ……. I try to eat before my body becomes hungry. A Psychologist once told me that I had to think negative thoughts before anxiety hit …… NOPE :bang: :bang: :bang: …. it's probably due to hunger …… when I am not anxious I could take on the World!
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Hi ladies :)
Thank you all so much.
I say this because reading this thread has been the most helpful reassuring thing I have done in a long time.
Although I have posted on it once or twice, this is the first time I have actually read it through and boy does it mirror my own thoughts and experiences, as other women have already said about their own experiences.
When I am feeling hormone related anxiety about any issue you like, I am convinced my fear is real and I can even produce 'evidence' that it is real.
I get fixated one a flavour-of-the month worry, and each different worry is always 'not like all the other fake worries' that is, until I once again discover that I am fretting over something that isn't worth worrying about.
My heart goes out to all you girls afflicted with this menopause related anxiety. Now that I have read this thread through, be t time I am convinced something is a genuine threat I will remember this thread and all my sisters on here going through the same thing, and I will postpone whatever it is I am getting all worked up about until after I have passed through the menopause, if I can manage to stop worrying enough to remember it's just lack of hormones.
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I have upped my BBs since last weeks awful episodes. A good night's sleep will help hopefully. But I had to cancel selling stuff at a car boot as I couldn't cope with the anxiety surges.
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I have upped my BBs since last weeks awful episodes. A good night's sleep will help hopefully. But I had to cancel selling stuff at a car boot as I couldn't cope with the anxiety surges.
Hope they are helping CKLD
Hope your anxiety abates and you can get your stuff sold when less anxious.
I totally lost it today. I just feel really overwhelmed and have got a few things on my mind at the moment. I've never been able to cope with stress very well and my self esteem is really low because of this. Of course peri doesn't help.
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Upping the meds seems to have helped. Also we are home.
I found that keeping a journal enabled me to vent, vent, vent ……...
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Upping the meds seems to have helped. Also we are home.
I found that keeping a journal enabled me to vent, vent, vent ……...
yeah i like to write it down, just let it all out.
Glad stuff went well for you
I went for my lunch like i do every thursday, and I had the worst hot flush ever. I had to keep going out.
I know it was warmish and humid today, but i was sitting outside in a strappy top.
I don't like the idea of waking in a wet bed, despite fan, the thought of sleeping on the floor crossed my mind, if sweats get even worse, least less bedding to constantly wash.
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Anxiety has hit me big time this year.
Mine is mostly related to health, have had a couple of scares this year- a lump in my breast which thankfully was a large cyst and was drained, and now piles have reared their ugly head ( but of course in my head both of these were the big C and I was beside myself with anxiety and busy planning my funeral).
What doesn't help is that once the stress starts, other symptoms start ( palpitations, dizziness etc) which makes the health anxiety even worse!! Add to that an ailing mother and two teenagers and it's a wonder I can get up in the mornings!!
I had never considered myself the anxious type until I hit menopause, what a nightmare.
W
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{{{ Westie }}}
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yes westie ((hugs)
piles are the pits and very uncomfortable. you have my deepest sympathies. Don't suffer alone. I find laying things down here in a post really helps me to move away from whatever it is for a while.
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Thanks CKLD and Babyjane yes it really does help venting on here and knowing I'm not alone.
Onwards and upwards!,
W xx
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I have a huge fear too... And to make the things worst I have another fear to go and ask my doctor to run a test and find out because what if...
Awful... It is poisoning my life :(
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I know exactly how you feel Nata I am the same, I get myself into such a state I can't think of anything else and by the time I get to the doctors I have convinced myself I have an in curable disease and find it difficult to believe that I haven't!!!
It's so ridiculous and as you say, it completely takes over your life.
I would encourage you though to go to the doctors if you are worried, it does help to talk to someone more rational.
Big hugs
W xx
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had a night sweat first time in ages last night, it really scared me as haven't had one in ages, and it was always the way it started before the palpatations etc started, I felt just weird with it, but managed to calm myself down with a flannel and cold water, don't know what brought it on x
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I think the dropping oestrogen levels can be erratic, there isn't really a reason. I had 4 months free of flushes and sweats all through the summer. Now, as the weather is cooler they are back again.
I have given up wondering why and just go with it.
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thanks Babyjane, wish all this would end as quick as it started and we could go back to normal, Im desperate to start exercise again but even that makes me anxious, hoping yoga will helpx
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I am not sure what you mean by 'go back to normal'. If you expect to return to how you were before menopause I am not sure that is what happens. It is called the 'change of life'. I think we get a different normal, a middle aged normal. I am not expecting to go back to how I was in my 30s and 40s when I am approaching 60 as the change in oestrogen levels means we cannot possibly be the same.
That said I am looking forward to my new 'normal' and hoping my 60s are an improvement on my 50s :)
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Babyjayne any normal would be good new normal sounds great :) x
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:foryou:
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I think its the unexpectedness that throws me and when anxiety strikes its so difficult to bring it back under control. If only some sense could be made of then it wouldn't sneek up behind you and thump you on the back of the head. I know it will get better and like BJ says you get a new normal but a good one I hope.
With so many of struggling you would think we could come up with a solution
Honeyb
X
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Funny, I was only thinking today, that I will never be the person I was three years ago, I won't ever come through it, so to speak, I will always be like this, for perhaps the next thirty years! And that is because, as I have mentioned many times, not having read the textbooks, my body decided 18 months after my last period, to throw every PHYSICAL menopause symptom at me, literally overnight. How can that ever go away, how can atrophy stop, it's already damaged everything, how can my tight pelvis ever come back, it's physically impossible, how can my digestion ever be normal again, the pelvic muscles are too tight to allow the digestive tract to process food. I never had the sweats or flushes that will disappear over the 5 - 10 years of normal menopause, I wish I had sometimes. I did have dreadful uncontrolled anxiety, which is controlled by drugs and hrt, the one "normal" symptom, maybe that will go away eventually, the others won't. So, how do we cope with long term, forever symptoms? We are not ill, so normal counselling and Talking Therapy won't help, do we just "put up and shut up"? How did women before us cope, were they stronger than us? I don't know the answer, but all suggestions would be gratefully received!
Feeling v depressed and sorry for myself today!
WANDERER XXXX
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Wanderer: Ladies do 'come through it' so why should you be any different?
Anxiety is an illness. Depression is an illness. Back pain and other aches can be treated - it's knowing which symptom to trot to the GP with 1st that was my problem :-\
Anxiety can be controlled ........... unless like me, it suddenly over-takes the medication >:(
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wanderer I have to disagree, talking therapy can sometimes help.
I was referred to the chronic illness psychology department at my hospital some years ago because I was struggling to accept my 'new normal' (not meno but something else). I was resentful and fighting against what was happening to me. the chronic illness psychologist dealt with the emotions that come as a result of a 'new normal' and helped guide towards a form of acceptance. I found it helpful for me, a bit like this forum finding I was not the only one to resent the change happening to me as a result of menopause.