Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => New Members => Topic started by: Aethelede on November 19, 2013, 01:06:46 PM
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Hello everyone,
Having spent ages reading the HRT good or bad? thread and having symptoms for the last three years, I decided I would go for it (symptoms getting worse) and rang my (new) surgery to make an appointment. I had cased the joint online previously and hand picked a young lady doctor whose interests included women's health issues. So far so good. Only to be met with "oh, she's on maternity leave". Ok. She can't help that. I asked for the other lady doctor. "She's on holiday til December". At this point my courage failed and I just said I would ring back. Hence the thread title. The other doctors are all male and middle-aged, with interests such as rugby and DIY. I know this shouldn't be an issue but I will find it very difficult keeping it all together to explain how I feel and that I really want to give HRT a try. I want the doctor to just say ok here you go but have the idea in my head that it will all be more difficult with an older male doctor.
Is this wrong? Is a female GP likely to be more sympathetic in your experience, or is it the luck of the draw?
Anyway, I did ring back and got an appointment for Thursday. I think it's with the rugby one. I feel nervous just thinking about it...
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Oh dear, that sounds typical, that can happen to me, get my courage up to make appt at docs to often be told the one and only lady at my gp practice is off .......
Whether male or female though you shouldn't be refused hrt unless on valid health grounds.
I don't take hrt at the moment but there is a lady on this forum who is very informative regarding it, I'm sure she will help if you have ay queries. There's also lots of info on the left hand menu.
You will get lots of help here xx
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I found that the male doctors in my surgery were better at HRT than the female doctors So go for it! If you have read all the info on the left then you will be able to make an informed decision and discuss it with him rather than just be told 'take this'.
Bramble
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I prefer a male GP. Mine is brilliant. I take a list which we work through together. Sometimes he's ahead of me in knowing what I require ;)
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Whereas female doctors - generally - instinctively know how we are feeling and will share the same issues eventually, a well informed male GP may be just as if not more objective and concerned to make sure he explores all the possibilities, being very aware that he cannot 'feel' the same problems.
My GP is female, but the consultant gynae who was also always so supportive, was a man!
What I am trying to say is that a male GP can show lots of empathy, so give him the benefit of the doubt first.
Good luck
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Thanks for your replies. :)
I think what I am dreading is just a flat refusal as some ladies on here have experienced. I won't want to just accept it but then I don't want to go ape on him and say 'gimme a prescription or I'll duff you up' either ;D (could happen!) I don't really understand why some GPs would just say 'no' and that's the end of it. They must prescribe a lot 'worse' things in terms of side effects etc.
Oh well. Just have to wait and see.
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Take a list of your symptoms. Talk it through and ask what the Surgery's policy towards menopause treatment and knowledge is. Make this a 2-way conversation and you should be fine. Tell the GP that you are happy to discuss whys and wherefores as you go along this journey together ;)
Have you read the menus, left of screen? You can always refer the Practice Nurse to MM Forum ......
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Hi Aethelede and welcome
I agree with CLKD - she posted just before me.
Go prepared - deep breaths - try to be calm but firm.
Read up as much info from this site as possible so you feel fully informed - print out relevant stuff so you can refer to it if need be. Write you symptoms down, list your reasons for wanting to try HRT e.g exhaustion through lack of sleep due to night sweats. I think if you have all this you will feel more confident and won't forget stuff.
The other ladies are right, sometimes the men can be better. Young female doctors can be very idealistic and dismissive and older lady doctors can be tough if they have been fortunate enough to fly through their meno with no real problems.
If the doctor is good they should do some blood tests to rule out any other issues e.g. thyroid function etc. If they do stonewall you then ask to be referred to a meno clinic. The GP I had in London just referred me immediately as he felt it was the best thing to do.
It's good to have an idea of the HRT you would like to try so if the doctor reaches for the magic drug manual he/she doesn't just pick the first one they come across.
If you are peri meno you will need sequential. Try to get something that has bio-identical(or similar) - I found Oestrogel(transdermal) good and had progesterone pills to induce the withdrawal bleed throughout my peri stage. If you want to try pills then Femoston might be a good first option as the progesterone is a kinder one with less side effects.
Good luck. Be Strong. DG x
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My long-term (30 yr) ob-gyn died just as I was going through menopause. I have since seen 3 women doctors, 1 gyn about 45y/o, 1 gyn about 35y/o and 1 gp about 50. I will no longer preferentially try to see women doctors anymore. They all seemed stressed and unsure to me. I have found men doctors much more receptive re: symptoms and taking care to work through the problems thoroughly.
Go for it....you can always see another doctor (woman) if you aren't comfortable, can't you?
Andius
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Or the Practice Nurse
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Thank you for the replies and advice :)
This site has already been invaluable for clear and practical information and reading other people's experiences always helps with perspective issues!
Feeling calmer about stuff today. I slept better which helps!
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My first appts where with a male doctor & now I am with a female one. I still haven't managed to get HRT ;D I hope you manage to get it though it sounds like you have been struggling for a while. I am not giving up. Keep us updated. Bev x
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Thanks Bev. It is a bit of an up and down struggle. Some days you feel ok and can cope and then others...
Well, I had my appointment this morning and the doctor was absolutely lovely. I had to change surgeries due to a house move and none of the GPs in my previous place were as nice as this doctor. In fact he was the nicest GP I have come across in years. I had a lovely lady doctor when I was in my twenties who was the right blend of practical, knowledgeable, reassuring and helpful and this chap was the same. How lucky is that?
He helped me with a couple of unrelated to menopause things and then went through the HRT stuff (over nearly half an hour in all) and I've ended up with patches to try for three months.
So, a good result. Just hope they work now... :)
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Really pleased for you Aethelede.
What patches has he given you?
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Thanks Limpy!
Have got Femseven Sequi. Going to get them tomorrow.
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Hope they help you.
Remember, it may take a little while before you feel any improvement, so hang in there!
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Brilliant news really pleased for you Bev x
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Great news Aethelede - and hope you feel the benefit soon!
Hurdity x
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Delighted to hear you had a positive experience - this is good for the future as well.
Hope patches work well for you and you feel better really soon.
Dg x
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Thanks all, fingers crossed!
Bev, has your doctor said why you can't have HRT? (Sorry if it's on another thread and I've missed it).
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My bloods are not showing anything but I have another test next week, everyone here says to go on symptoms not bloods so if they do not show anything again I am going armed with lots of stuff from here & little bits I have bookmarked here & there. I am nearly 51 not too young or anything its classic, if anything I am a late starter of peri. I know 100% its hormones but I had a blip of anxiety in the 90's so think I am labelled now but this is way different to then. I have had an amazing few years up to this Sping with starting my own business from nothing when the youngest kids went to school, they are 8 & 9 so I have a huge responsibility to them & have to get better. I haven't worked since August & my husband is doing school runs & shopping so its starting to really affect us financially as he is only able to work 9-3pm. I am such a happy positive person normally, I want the old me back asap ;D
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I hope it works out next time Bev and you get something to help.
Starting your own business is a brilliant thing to do. I can understand why you just want to feel normal and get back to doing that and bringing up your family. I think all most of us want is to be able to work if we need to and get on with our lives without these awful, unpredictable symptoms.
Will keep fingers crossed for you :).
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Hey lovely
Do surgery have any nurse practioners? they can be valuable in understanding women's health and give you sounder advice dare I say that a guy.....
See what happens
Hugs Lyn :)
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Hi Lyn and thanks :)
I saw one of the male doctors at the surgery in the end and he was really lovely, so as usual I was worrying for nothing.
I started patches a few days ago and looking forward to improvements soon! Really hoping for a good night's sleep as at the moment I am waking up regularly every night with flushes. If this is the only improvement I will be happy as the lack of sleep impacts on everything.