Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => All things menopause => Topic started by: Goldie70 on January 29, 2024, 06:47:40 PM
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I’m not sure if this has a direct menopausal cause but I’m sure it’s hormonal because it seems to flare up at certain times of the month. Recently with my HRT being stopped and restarted it’s all over the place and anxiety pretty much constant.
If driving on fast busy roads I get hot, lightheaded and totally feel I have no spatial awareness and terrified I’m going to turn my wheel and end up in front of a car in the opposite lane. It’s like I don’t trust myself to drive and become hyper aware. I drive quiet country roads rather than dual carriage ways which is having a big impact on getting places.
Some days it goes smoothly and I don’t feel like that but then it comes on and it’s terrifying. I feel like giving up driving altogether as it’s becoming such a stress before each drive in case it’s going to happen again.
I used to drive on the dual carriageway with no problems.
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I have this, definitely since early peri. I'd love to hear how other ladies deal with it.
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Yep. I think that peri 4 me causes an increase in spatial awareness of other vehicles who seem to be 'too' close and a lack of confidence. Many have stopped driving on motorways or after dark for example. Me, I've lost the art of reversing! ::)
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Hats off to you both for still driving, I don't for this very reason! We've just sold our bigger car as it was stupid and expensive keeping both when only my husband drives atm.
Like you Goldie, I have images of having an accident, usually hitting a pedestrian or a cyclist, even though I've never had so much as a minor collision.
Now my hrt is sorted with more estrogen, I plan on doing short local drives as I really need to with two children to ferry around, but I can't ever imagine going on a motorway or relaxing and enjoying driving again. Hoping that others come on here with success stories to give me hope!!!
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Yes, this is me also!
Woke up one day in January 2019, panic stricken at the thought of having to drive my 10 year old son to school. This is a fast bendy country road, with no white lines. A road I had driven for years, twice a day! Couldn’t do it.
Then it escalated to dual carriage ways, driving in total darkness
( no street lights and doing the full beam/ dip thing) Motorways, forget it! I would get hot, shake and generally end up driving slowly.
A high oestrogen dose fixed it. Now I’m off HRT for health reasons and the anxiety is worse. Today I’ve requested sertraline because it’s not sustainable to be this anxious in the world we live in.
I’ve tried CBD, sucking sweets, singing, deep breathing; nothing works.
Solidarity and empathy coming your way.
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I also became a very nervous driver when peri first hit. I only drove when I had to and would take ages to psyche myself up.
However, since HRT I'm OK with driving now.
Hopefully Nas , the sertraline will calm the anxiety so you can get your life back.
Good luck everyone with regaining the independence we once had xx
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When working years ago I found that the journey home after a busy day became more difficult. There is absolutely no where to pull off ....... I had to make sure that I had a banana 20 mins B4 leaving work to stop some of that panic of 'what if I need to stop'.
I've never driven on a motorway as we travel together. I could, if I HAD to do so but wouldn't be comfortable.
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Thanks Banjo1973,
I really want it to worK, as I HATE the anxiety feeling with a passion and living semi rural, I do need to drive.
Fingers crossed the sertraline works (at some point).
:)
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Hi Nas,
Really hoping it works for you. I know of a number of people who take it, some of them long term. They are very pleased with it.
Good luck xx
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It's somewhat reassuring to know a lot of us are struggling with our driving. Before peri I was a confident driver, loved going on road trips. Now I'm scared to drive, it started with my irritation with other drivers, then it became a loss of confidence with my own driving. I think the brain fog makes it scary to drive. I had a minor accident with a curb last year and I can't remember how it could have happened. Getting overwhelmed on the road is a huge problem too, I hate travelling in peak traffic, I've had many panic attacks while driving alone and get so scared I'll have an accident, sometimes it feels like everyone is swerving in to your lane.
All my doctors are about an hours drive from where I live so I have no choice but to keep driving. To help me cope I plan my journey and try and give myself extra time so I'm not panicking about being late. I also put together playlists of calming music or something I can sing along to so I'm not stressing. I often tell myself "serenity Now" if I sense myself stressing, it doesn't always work but I'll give anything a go.
Keen to hear if anyone else has some non-medical techniques, I'm on HRT but am unable to take anti-depressants (had a bad reaction to sertraline).
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Hi Goldie70
Yes this also is me. I've been driving since 1985 but with the flare up of my anxiety etc. driving scares the hell of me now to be honest. It never ever bothered me before x
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U could seek a few lessons with a driving instructor to give you confidence, road conditions have altered a lot in recent years. I started Road Rage by the way :o ::)
I also mutter at the TV when people don't see that when looking round properties there simply isn't enough storage ;D
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Unless you can get the anxiety under control by hrt or ads the next best solution might be some refresher driving lessons with a sympathetic instructor, or else do an advanced driving course.
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One gets cheaper insurance if 1 passes the Advanced Course ;-)
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It’s interesting isn’t it and damn frustrating how we are affected by this.
I drove today on my usual country roads (I avoid busy dual carriageways) and was relatively okay … my mind seemed to wander a bit rather than the actual act of driving if you know what I mean. I know the shakiness, hot feeling and terror will return though - it’s like I’m waiting for it.
Would love to drive on dual carriageways again … I’m thinking I might do it very early in the morning like 6am with few cars about on just a short section where I can then pull off. I don’t think this will help though as I know I just seem to wait for all the horrible symptoms to happen when I try the dual carriageway and just thinking about it pre-empts the fear.
I used to be on 100mg sertraline and even that didn’t help.
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Yes, this is me also!
Woke up one day in January 2019, panic stricken at the thought of having to drive my 10 year old son to school. This is a fast bendy country road, with no white lines. A road I had driven for years, twice a day! Couldn’t do it.
Then it escalated to dual carriage ways, driving in total darkness
( no street lights and doing the full beam/ dip thing) Motorways, forget it! I would get hot, shake and generally end up driving slowly.
A high oestrogen dose fixed it. Now I’m off HRT for health reasons and the anxiety is worse. Today I’ve requested sertraline because it’s not sustainable to be this anxious in the world we live in.
I’ve tried CBD, sucking sweets, singing, deep breathing; nothing works.
Solidarity and empathy coming your way.
Anxiety is so debilitating … I experience all the symptoms you have mentioned when driving too … it’s terrifying.
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It's somewhat reassuring to know a lot of us are struggling with our driving. Before peri I was a confident driver, loved going on road trips. Now I'm scared to drive, it started with my irritation with other drivers, then it became a loss of confidence with my own driving. I think the brain fog makes it scary to drive. I had a minor accident with a curb last year and I can't remember how it could have happened. Getting overwhelmed on the road is a huge problem too, I hate travelling in peak traffic, I've had many panic attacks while driving alone and get so scared I'll have an accident, sometimes it feels like everyone is swerving in to your lane.
All my doctors are about an hours drive from where I live so I have no choice but to keep driving. To help me cope I plan my journey and try and give myself extra time so I'm not panicking about being late. I also put together playlists of calming music or something I can sing along to so I'm not stressing. I often tell myself "serenity Now" if I sense myself stressing, it doesn't always work but I'll give anything a go.
Keen to hear if anyone else has some non-medical techniques, I'm on HRT but am unable to take anti-depressants (had a bad reaction to sertraline).
Yes I get that too that it feels like other cars are swerving into me … I also dislike driving over bridges. It seems like a balance and spatial awareness thing. Wish there was a magic solution but it seems it’s just something that has to pass… I’ve had it for almost 16 years since peri started I think … I can’t see me ever being a confident driver again.
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Unless you can get the anxiety under control by hrt or ads the next best solution might be some refresher driving lessons :(with a sympathetic instructor, or else :(do an advanced driving course.
I almost signed up with an instructor who specialised in driving anxiety but it was expensive and about 200 miles away. My husband has offered to be the passenger while I try my scary roads but I think that would actually make me worse
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I love this board for confirming to me that I'm not alone.
Everything that everyone's said is how I feel, but I thought it was me and I somehow had to fight it / beat it. I live in a town where the only way out is along fast (national speed limit) roads.
I ended up doing a mad thing starting about 6 years ago. I upped the challenge. I went back to riding a motorbike. Insane. But oddly not. Most bikes have much faster acceleration and a lot more visibility. I don't know how, but it's less scary. It's like I can feel the world, it's really there, a concrete reality I understand how to respond to. And the responses are very direct.
Anyway, it hasn't helped massively (although I can do a steady 60 whereas before I was kind of struck at 40). Have to say, it's also pretty cool that I ride a red cruiser. It's a confidence bump.
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Most driving instructors will be up2date with anxiety around driving so do look closer to home.