Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => All things menopause => Topic started by: Losingtheplot on April 30, 2023, 09:15:35 AM
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I have literally woken this morning feel totally overwhelmed at my life so much so that that intense urge to want to run away from it all is there in a big big way!
Is this hormonal or is this just life getting to me? I want just to have me to take care of and no one else. I could never leave my son and don't mind doing things for him but find it a struggle at the min. Due to working hours with me and hubby I feel I do the most on an evening sorting dogs and tea out. But this is life right? Just need to get on with it. I guess I feel unappreciated too at times. I love my hubby, son and cute dogs but feel so lonely at same time. I do have a lovely circle of close friends. Maybe its time for Ads all I know is my brain is thinking in a very negative way today and someones comment to me the other day about this as good as it gets has me now thinking I can't cope with years upon years of feeling like this :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(.
Ive no panic or palpitations just sadness today
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Hi there. I really am sorry to hear how low you are feeling. It sounds like you have a lot on plus dealing with meno on top of all this is bound to have an effect on you.
It sounds like you may need to take a few deep breaths. You do not have to do everything at once and you will not always feel this way. It is understandable you feel you just want to have to take care of yourself. It is hard enough looking after ourselves sometimes without having to care for others.
I know many women on the forum have spoken about how difficult it is to work while going through meno so my heart goes out to you. It really is very challenging.
The person who said this is as good as it gets, is so wrong! Things will not always be this way. You are going through a difficult patch and it is perfectly fine to want to have time to yourself and to also want to feel appreciated.
I have found meno can feel so lonely. I think it is really positive you have made this post so we can all support you and let you know that you are not alone.
If you feel it may help to try an Ad then that is a good idea too. I know I could not mange without one myself.
How are you feeling now?
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Hi there. I really am sorry to hear how low you are feeling. It sounds like you have a lot on plus dealing with meno on top of all this is bound to have an effect on you.
It sounds like you may need to take a few deep breaths. You do not have to do everything at once and you will not always feel this way. It is understandable you feel you just want to have to take care of yourself. It is hard enough looking after ourselves sometimes without having to care for others.
I know many women on the forum have spoken about how difficult it is to work while going through meno so my heart goes out to you. It really is very challenging.
The person who said this is as good as it gets, is so wrong! Things will not always be this way. You are going through a difficult patch and it is perfectly fine to want to have time to yourself and to also want to feel appreciated.
I have found meno can feel so lonely. I think it is really positive you have made this post so we can all support you and let you know that you are not alone.
If you feel it may help to try an Ad then that is a good idea too. I know I could not mange without one myself.
How are you feeling now?
Hi Flossieteacake
Thank you for replying! And your lovely words. I am just feeling very sad to be honest possibly sorry for myself. I didn't feel like this yesterday probably due to fact my chest and neck felt like it was on fire most of the day so was trying to deal with that !
I think I need a good cry and to let it all out. Life just feels so hard !
Then a stressful job on top just don't feel there is any pleasure in anything at the moment. I had a meltdown at work other day relating to an issue with my son where he didn't confide in me and tried dealing with the issue himself.
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
Ahh you are so right my son is my world and will always come first and I feel immense guilt that I am even having thoughts of leaving him by one method or another as he would be devastated! What kind of mother does that make me.even contemplating this :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(a bad one it would destroy him.
My manager is very approachable and she did email me asking how things were with me lately and I understand this is due to another colleague raising issues about a mutual colleague not pulling their weight putting.more pressure on us all but just don't have the energy to get into that saga!
So I haven't had time to reply about my meno struggles affecting work. Also part of the reason for this is due to a new job to be advertised in a few months in the department I want to apply for meaning a higher wage and I feel this will go against.me if I mention my meno struggles
The job I do now covers alot of work the new job would involve and my manager is of meno herself so I am sure would be understanding.
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Hi Losingtheplot
I'm so sorry to hear you sounding so low. I am sure it is related to fluctuating hormones at a time in life when we have lots of pressures and responsibilities and overall it causes us to be overwhelmed.
Some days I feel really good. I'm positive, energetic and motivated and feel relieved that there is a glimpse of the old me, only to wake up the next day and wonder what the point of it all is. Its nuts. Havent a clue what happened overnight! On those lower days I just try and manage my own expectations and think it will pass and I will feel better, if not tomorrow then the day after. And it does pass. Its just a horrible rollercoaster that you don't feel in control of.
And I agree with you that it is an incredibly lonely time. I'm fortunate to have a wonderful husband, extended family (I don't have children) and lovely friends and even though I try and be as open as I can about how I'm feeling I don't think they truly understand. Even though they are all so supportive I feel I am letting them down as I'm not the confident, bubbly, fun person I was and I think they miss the old me too.
It sounds like you have an understanding boss and my view is to be as honest as you can about how you are feeling. At least this may explain any unusual behaviours you may (or may not) be displaying in work. I think it's better to communicate
The way I try and get through is by thinking this is all "temporary". One day and a time. I'm learning to be kind to myself and try to plan/manage myself / diary so I don't get overwhelmed by stuff. That definitely helps.
You aren't alone. Sending you best wishes and strength X
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Jobs and meno area hideous combination i think.
It’s so so tough for women at this stage of life. Trying to juggle families, jobs, houses and hormones!
I hope you can find a way forward somehow. I can
empathise with the sad empty feeling, I experience that too and often wonder, is this my life now?
Chin up… and just take a day at a time. It’s the best way.
😊
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Hi Losingtheplot
I'm so sorry to hear you sounding so low. I am sure it is related to fluctuating hormones at a time in life when we have lots of pressures and responsibilities and overall it causes us to be overwhelmed.
Some days I feel really good. I'm positive, energetic and motivated and feel relieved that there is a glimpse of the old me, only to wake up the next day and wonder what the point of it all is. Its nuts. Havent a clue what happened overnight! On those lower days I just try and manage my own expectations and think it will pass and I will feel better, if not tomorrow then the day after. And it does pass. Its just a horrible rollercoaster that you don't feel in control of.
And I agree with you that it is an incredibly lonely time. I'm fortunate to have a wonderful husband, extended family (I don't have children) and lovely friends and even though I try and be as open as I can about how I'm feeling I don't think they truly understand. Even though they are all so supportive I feel I am letting them down as I'm not the confident, bubbly, fun person I was and I think they miss the old me too.
It sounds like you have an understanding boss and my view is to be as honest as you can about how you are feeling. At least this may explain any unusual behaviours you may (or may not) be displaying in work. I think it's better to communicate
The way I try and get through is by thinking this is all "temporary". One day and a time. I'm learning to be kind to myself and try to plan/manage myself / diary so I don't get overwhelmed by stuff. That definitely helps.
You aren't alone. Sending you best wishes and strength X
Hi DottyD68
Ahh so sorry you also have these awful times. By you sharing this though you have helped me so thank you.
My boss is lovely and meno age herself so I do think she will be supportive.
I am being kind to myself today and having me time I deserve it.
Thank you for your advice too xxxx
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Jobs and meno area hideous combination i think.
It’s so so tough for women at this stage of life. Trying to juggle families, jobs, houses and hormones!
I hope you can find a way forward somehow. I can
empathise with the sad empty feeling, I experience that too and often wonder, is this my life now?
Chin up… and just take a day at a time. It’s the best way.
😊
Thanks hunni and big hugs xxx
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Hi Sweetie,
Am so sorry you are having a bad time, that you are in a bad dip of your mood. It's so hard when I can see you have pulled yourself up before, and had some positive days only to crash.
For what its worth,I get it and I do understand.
You are so lovely at supporting others and giving good advice. I am trying to (very very reluctantly) accept all that is going on with what feels to be like a devastating impact of peri. I have learnt I just cannot physically do many normal day to day tasks.
Maybe, even in a packed busy work and home life you can delegate some tasks to your husband and son. Also, maybe, your son, in attempting to sort a problem himself was doing his best to spare you, to be indpendent. Could this be seen as a good thing?
Understand you avoiding office politics. This is good! You have enough to cope with in your own physical and mental health. I think we'll done for walking away from that one.
I have an assessment for therapy next week. I just feel completely overwhelmed with peri symptoms and generally unable to cope with much of normal life in a way. It's too big a change in all my life. Could something like this benefit you?
I get you feel like you want to walk away. And on the better days you KNOW that's not true. It's just days like these feel too much.
Just ten minutes or so day just for -separate yourself to a spot in room on your own- you can help. To sit quietly, clear your mind, do you nails, but it gentle yoga, whatever. We can overburden ourselves in thinking we can juggle everything. And some days we can, some days we cant.
Remember to be kind to yourself. Life has altered whether we like it or not. Fingers crossed, we can all get a better stability and more up than down days.
Take care, xx
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
Ahh you are so right my son is my world and will always come first and I feel immense guilt that I am even having thoughts of leaving him by one method or another as he would be devastated! What kind of mother does that make me.even contemplating this :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(a bad one it would destroy him.
My manager is very approachable and she did email me asking how things were with me lately and I understand this is due to another colleague raising issues about a mutual colleague not pulling their weight putting.more pressure on us all but just don't have the energy to get into that saga!
So I haven't had time to reply about my meno struggles affecting work. Also part of the reason for this is due to a new job to be advertised in a few months in the department I want to apply for meaning a higher wage and I feel this will go against.me if I mention my meno struggles
The job I do now covers alot of work the new job would involve and my manager is of meno herself so I am sure would be understanding.
Your thoughts do not make you a bad mother. What they make you is somebody who is very low. Please get the thought you are a bad mother right out of your head as it is clear how much you adore your son. We cannot help our thoughts. I think as you are having such thoughts it is important to tell your GP how you are feeling. It may even be helpful to have some counselling. Somebody impartial to talk to can be such a help.
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Hi Sweetie,
Am so sorry you are having a bad time, that you are in a bad dip of your mood. It's so hard when I can see you have pulled yourself up before, and had some positive days only to crash.
For what its worth,I get it and I do understand.
You are so lovely at supporting others and giving good advice. I am trying to (very very reluctantly) accept all that is going on with what feels to be like a devastating impact of peri. I have learnt I just cannot physically do many normal day to day tasks.
Maybe, even in a packed busy work and home life you can delegate some tasks to your husband and son. Also, maybe, your son, in attempting to sort a problem himself was doing his best to spare you, to be indpendent. Could this be seen as a good thing?
Understand you avoiding office politics. This is good! You have enough to cope with in your own physical and mental health. I think we'll done for walking away from that one.
I have an assessment for therapy next week. I just feel completely overwhelmed with peri symptoms and generally unable to cope with much of normal life in a way. It's too big a change in all my life. Could something like this benefit you?
I get you feel like you want to walk away. And on the better days you KNOW that's not true. It's just days like these feel too much.
Just ten minutes or so day just for -separate yourself to a spot in room on your own- you can help. To sit quietly, clear your mind, do you nails, but it gentle yoga, whatever. We can overburden ourselves in thinking we can juggle everything. And some days we can, some days we cant.
Remember to be kind to yourself. Life has altered whether we like it or not. Fingers crossed, we can all get a better stability and more up than down days.
Take care, xx
Thank u xxx This isn't the first time I have felt like this but in past never even thought it to be meno related some of it could well be life getting on top of me too though.
My son is a very thoughtful kind boy and is only 12 and he told me how stressed he had been over the situation he was in and said he was a terrible son! That's what got me :'( :'( :'( :'( I told him I will always have time for him and he is an amazing son.
I have always been on hard on myself right from a young age and give too much of myself to people with sometimes very little back which I find hurtful. I am.getting better at saying No if I feel I can't take anymore on but then feel I am letting people down.
I know you suffer very much the same sweetie and I am so grateful that you have posted
I just think life shouldn't be this bloody hard i get having ups and downs but with hormones thrown it too! Feel like an emotional wreck but tomorrow is another day.xxxx
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
Ahh you are so right my son is my world and will always come first and I feel immense guilt that I am even having thoughts of leaving him by one method or another as he would be devastated! What kind of mother does that make me.even contemplating this :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(a bad one it would destroy him.
My manager is very approachable and she did email me asking how things were with me lately and I understand this is due to another colleague raising issues about a mutual colleague not pulling their weight putting.more pressure on us all but just don't have the energy to get into that saga!
So I haven't had time to reply about my meno struggles affecting work. Also part of the reason for this is due to a new job to be advertised in a few months in the department I want to apply for meaning a higher wage and I feel this will go against.me if I mention my meno struggles
The job I do now covers alot of work the new job would involve and my manager is of meno herself so I am sure would be understanding.
Your thoughts do not make you a bad mother. What they make you is somebody who is very low. Please get the thought you are a bad mother right out of your head as it is clear how much you adore your son. We cannot help our thoughts. I think as you are having such thoughts it is important to tell your GP how you are feeling. It may even be helpful to have some counselling. Somebody impartial to talk to can be such a help.
I feel I just have too much going on and that's making me feel low. I will book an appointment in with my GP and ask for counselling potentially and or Ads but I find counselling has not really benefited me as I have a good group of friends I can speak too. I need to.stop dwelling on certain things and move forward I do try to do this.
My son knows I am always here for him and he confides in me more than his dad
Maybe once my HRT is right life.might start looking more enjoyable than it does currently
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Just to say counselling is a lot different than speaking with friends, amazing though friends are for us.
Sometimes an 'outsider' can put a very different perspective on things. They can say things we may not want to hear,but whilst we have a natural resistance to hearing something that can be quite near to the truth... Well it helps us see things in a different light.
Maybe some coping techniques.
Good for you starting to say No sometimes. That's so positive.I am a victim of this And learning it too. We need to let go of being everyone's someone if that makes sense,obviously caring about those who matter so much to us. And that would include ourselves too sweetie.
Counselling is not for everyone of course, or Ad's but good to have options, and talking with your g.p is a great way to see what would suit you.
You son does sound amazing, he knows his mum is always there for him. Bless him for trying to do something his own way.
It's a bad day but don't let go of the knowledge you are taking positive steops
Xx
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Just to say counselling is a lot different than speaking with friends, amazing though friends are for us.
Sometimes an 'outsider' can put a very different perspective on things. They can say things we may not want to hear,but whilst we have a natural resistance to hearing something that can be quite near to the truth... Well it helps us see things in a different light.
Maybe some coping techniques.
Good for you starting to say No sometimes. That's so positive.I am a victim of this And learning it too. We need to let go of being everyone's someone if that makes sense,obviously caring about those who matter so much to us. And that would include ourselves too sweetie.
Counselling is not for everyone of course, or Ad's but good to have options, and talking with your g.p is a great way to see what would suit you.
You son does sound amazing, he knows his mum is always there for him. Bless him for trying to do something his own way.
It's a bad day but don't let go of the knowledge you are taking positive steops
Xx
Hey hunni the coping strategies would be very useful! I am very open to that. And with counselling I am not ruling it out. I did talking therapies a few years ago with telephone consultations and just found it very difficult. There didnt seem to be any structure from what I recall. I felt very uncomfortable and like there was long silences. Years previous to that when I was single I had some face to face counselling and that seemed better. Discussed issues that I had dealt with as a child, bullying, alcoholic dad and many more.
Its that internal voice in my head making me doubt myself but intensified due to bloody meno! As days gone on I am feeling better than before and all your lovely posts have played a part.
Thank you xxx
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Hi Sweetie,
Am so sorry you are having a bad time, that you are in a bad dip of your mood. It's so hard when I can see you have pulled yourself up before, and had some positive days only to crash.
For what its worth,I get it and I do understand.
You are so lovely at supporting others and giving good advice. I am trying to (very very reluctantly) accept all that is going on with what feels to be like a devastating impact of peri. I have learnt I just cannot physically do many normal day to day tasks.
Maybe, even in a packed busy work and home life you can delegate some tasks to your husband and son. Also, maybe, your son, in attempting to sort a problem himself was doing his best to spare you, to be indpendent. Could this be seen as a good thing?
Understand you avoiding office politics. This is good! You have enough to cope with in your own physical and mental health. I think we'll done for walking away from that one.
I have an assessment for therapy next week. I just feel completely overwhelmed with peri symptoms and generally unable to cope with much of normal life in a way. It's too big a change in all my life. Could something like this benefit you?
I get you feel like you want to walk away. And on the better days you KNOW that's not true. It's just days like these feel too much.
Just ten minutes or so day just for -separate yourself to a spot in room on your own- you can help. To sit quietly, clear your mind, do you nails, but it gentle yoga, whatever. We can overburden ourselves in thinking we can juggle everything. And some days we can, some days we cant.
Remember to be kind to yourself. Life has altered whether we like it or not. Fingers crossed, we can all get a better stability and more up than down days.
Take care, xx
Good luck with your assessment hope it goes well. Keep us updated hunni xxxx
Thank you to each and everyone one of you for helping me today. I had me time this afternoon treated myself to some new make up and a nice massage. Then some nice family time with my son and hubby. I am feeling better than I was this morning and am learning to ride it out xx
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So pleased to hear you had a nice treat. I think treating ourselves is so important when feeling low.
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So pleased to hear you had a nice treat. I think treating ourselves is so important when feeling low.
Yes your so right. I am trying not to overwhelm myself with everything as my mind races all the time of what needs done etc and how I should beable to do it all!
One thing I found when I took Ads was that this used to calm down alot and help me relax.
Life just does feel so difficult at the min but I know I am not alone xxx
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So pleased to hear you had a nice treat. I think treating ourselves is so important when feeling low.
Yes your so right. I am trying not to overwhelm myself with everything as my mind races all the time of what needs done etc and how I should beable to do it all!
One thing I found when I took Ads was that this used to calm down alot and help me relax.
Life just does feel so difficult at the min but I know I am not alone xxx
Thinking of all you need to do it bound to make you feel anxious and stressed. I know it does with me. I hope you can get an appointment with the DR soon to discuss taking ADs again. Sounds like it will help you a lot to just take the edge off.
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So pleased to hear you had a nice treat. I think treating ourselves is so important when feeling low.
Yes your so right. I am trying not to overwhelm myself with everything as my mind races all the time of what needs done etc and how I should beable to do it all!
One thing I found when I took Ads was that this used to calm down alot and help me relax.
Life just does feel so difficult at the min but I know I am not alone xxx
Thinking of all you need to do it bound to make you feel anxious and stressed. I know it does with me. I hope you can get an appointment with the DR soon to discuss taking ADs again. Sounds like it will help you a lot to just take the edge off.
Thank you I just don't want to be in a situation where I may potentially end up v depressed and know from past takes a long time to get back to feeling where life is manageable again. If I think back properly Ive been like this since Jan of this year. I stopped Ads in July 2022 but also started suffering from a very painful shoulder so had quite abit to deal with. This shoulder has now ended up being a frozen shoulder! No amounts of physio helped and it got worse.
I hope I get an appointment soon although I may still have a packet of Ads in a drawer.
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So pleased to hear you had a nice treat. I think treating ourselves is so important when feeling low.
Yes your so right. I am trying not to overwhelm myself with everything as my mind races all the time of what needs done etc and how I should beable to do it all!
One thing I found when I took Ads was that this used to calm down alot and help me relax.
Life just does feel so difficult at the min but I know I am not alone xxx
Thinking of all you need to do it bound to make you feel anxious and stressed. I know it does with me. I hope you can get an appointment with the DR soon to discuss taking ADs again. Sounds like it will help you a lot to just take the edge off.
Thank you I just don't want to be in a situation where I may potentially end up v depressed and know from past takes a long time to get back to feeling where life is manageable again. If I think back properly Ive been like this since Jan of this year. I stopped Ads in July 2022 but also started suffering from a very painful shoulder so had quite abit to deal with. This shoulder has now ended up being a frozen shoulder! No amounts of physio helped and it got worse.
I hope I get an appointment soon although I may still have a packet of Ads in a drawer.
I have heard a frozen shoulder is very painful and how horrible you have that to deal with. If ADs help then they are so worth taking. Anything is better then feeling depressed. It would be good if you do have some left so you can begin them right away.
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So pleased to hear you had a nice treat. I think treating ourselves is so important when feeling low.
Yes your so right. I am trying not to overwhelm myself with everything as my mind races all the time of what needs done etc and how I should beable to do it all!
One thing I found when I took Ads was that this used to calm down alot and help me relax.
Life just does feel so difficult at the min but I know I am not alone xxx
Thinking of all you need to do it bound to make you feel anxious and stressed. I know it does with me. I hope you can get an appointment with the DR soon to discuss taking ADs again. Sounds like it will help you a lot to just take the edge off.
Thank you I just don't want to be in a situation where I may potentially end up v depressed and know from past takes a long time to get back to feeling where life is manageable again. If I think back properly Ive been like this since Jan of this year. I stopped Ads in July 2022 but also started suffering from a very painful shoulder so had quite abit to deal with. This shoulder has now ended up being a frozen shoulder! No amounts of physio helped and it got worse.
I hope I get an appointment soon although I may still have a packet of Ads in a drawer.
I have heard a frozen shoulder is very painful and how horrible you have that to deal with. If ADs help then they are so worth taking. Anything is better then feeling depressed. It would be good if you do have some left so you can begin them right away.
Hi the thing is its difficult to know if it is onset of depression which is the confusing part of it all. I don't feel depressed in the typical sense as I have in the past but maybe they will help lift my mood and stop it being all over the place. One day I can be feeling ok, the next negative thoughts and over whelmed then 3 days of feeling ok etc
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Hiya,
Am happy that yesterday ended on a good note for you. So pleased you made some time and treated yourself.
I do understand the feeling of being overwhelmed. And I think that's because a lot of us quite simply are. We have so much to cope with, all of normal work life, family life, general health problems and then to throw it all in the mix, the final straw.... Pri\meno and all that that brings.
I think we can all reach a point where we are almost full up with all the roles we have. And many are totally essential of course, work, caring for our loved ones. I find it hard to admit and accept that I have changed so much being hit with peri. I just cannot physically or mentally do some some things anymore. But am optimistic I will get a better stability and build things up again.
Can you bring yourself to let go of some of the smaller tasks in your day? The non essentials of course. To ease some of the pressure you may be putting upon yourself, as I think you have said before you can do this to yourself?
I still think it is a good idea to make an appt with your g.p to discuss how you feel. Do make your notes beforehand, I am always going off at a tangent on appts. Ask your questions and tell them what an impact these feelings have on your life.
I was just wondering if there are some little changes it may be possible for you to make in your life, I am Crap at asking for help from my willing husband...I always think I should do everything as I have done before. But I have to accept help sometimes.
I do feel for you. It's a Crap time in your lives, but on my good days I remain optimistic. And I hope you do too.
Xx
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Hiya,
Am happy that yesterday ended on a good note for you. So pleased you made some time and treated yourself.
I do understand the feeling of being overwhelmed. And I think that's because a lot of us quite simply are. We have so much to cope with, all of normal work life, family life, general health problems and then to throw it all in the mix, the final straw.... Pri\meno and all that that brings.
I think we can all reach a point where we are almost full up with all the roles we have. And many are totally essential of course, work, caring for our loved ones. I find it hard to admit and accept that I have changed so much being hit with peri. I just cannot physically or mentally do some some things anymore. But am optimistic I will get a better stability and build things up again.
Can you bring yourself to let go of some of the smaller tasks in your day? The non essentials of course. To ease some of the pressure you may be putting upon yourself, as I think you have said before you can do this to yourself?
I still think it is a good idea to make an appt with your g.p to discuss how you feel. Do make your notes beforehand, I am always going off at a tangent on appts. Ask your questions and tell them what an impact these feelings have on your life.
I was just wondering if there are some little changes it may be possible for you to make in your life, I am Crap at asking for help from my willing husband...I always think I should do everything as I have done before. But I have to accept help sometimes.
I do feel for you. It's a Crap time in your lives, but on my good days I remain optimistic. And I hope you do too.
Xx
I am trying to realise that certain things can wait like you suggest hunni not every thing needs to get done asap so thank u for this as funnily enough I thought about this myself just today.
Its very tiring having all these thoughts whirring around in my head. Hubby did the gardening today which he takes on as his job and takes a fair bit of time. I did some ironing and what else I felt I could manage then left rest.
Ahh you do good to ask for help and I am learning to aswell.
I miss my younger body but feel its gone and I have been trying to come to terms with that. Maybe if aches and pains were under control I would better. I feel about 90 years old with constant joint pain. Exercise is a de stress for me but too much at this moment in time. Onwards and upwards and will ring GP for an appointment tomorrow.
Thanks again xxx
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Hi losingtheplot, I’ve not been on here a few days but just found your thread, and just wanted to say, I know how you feel. I have days where everything just feels too much and I even sometimes feel like I wish I didn’t have anyone else to take care of but then a few days later I’m so glad they are there and I start to feel ok again. There is a saying ‘a thoughtie is not a naughty’; when we are mentally exhausted we can have strange thoughts, it’s just what happens but it’s just due to exhaustion and not how you really feel. I think it’s just a sign that you need to really do everything you can to take care of yourself and let others know how you feel so they can help you too. I really think we all feel this way sometimes. Just know you will get through this time and you are strong: you are on here, working on this, finding ways to figure things out, finding your way through. Keep posting, we are here for you. Xxxx
-
Hi losingtheplot, I’ve not been on here a few days but just found your thread, and just wanted to say, I know how you feel. I have days where everything just feels too much and I even sometimes feel like I wish I didn’t have anyone else to take care of but then a few days later I’m so glad they are there and I start to feel ok again. There is a saying ‘a thoughtie is not a naughty’; when we are mentally exhausted we can have strange thoughts, it’s just what happens but it’s just due to exhaustion and not how you really feel. I think it’s just a sign that you need to really do everything you can to take care of yourself and let others know how you feel so they can help you too. I really think we all feel this way sometimes. Just know you will get through this time and you are strong: you are on here, working on this, finding ways to figure things out, finding your way through. Keep posting, we are here for you. Xxxx
Thank u Katherine your reply made me cry as your so right. I do feel mentally drained by all the ups & downs and an emotional wreck most days. But I love my family and have an almost teen son who needs my support but I have so much happening to me last few years this overwhelms me.
I tell him to lean on his dad for things too. He prefers to come to me though.
This means alot to know you are all here to listen and offer advice same goes right back at you. The part that scares me though is when I have suicidal thoughts :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( as I sincerely hope it never gets to that ever. The thoughts aren't there all the time but are like a escape route for me and this morning the fight or flight thoughts were on suicide as a release. So I feel I must go back on Ads for this reason albeit it be a low dose to start with. The thoughts are more intense today and seem to be coming in waves and I've had Utrogestan for the 1st time last night. Connection possibly or would it take longer for a side effect like this? Still very earlier on the HRT regime and tying Ashwagandha to help me with stress/anxiety and like all meds/herb supplements takes time to work. I just want more better days than not better days like we all do. I am sorry you also have periods of feeling like I do hunni - its so bloody hard isn't it?
I am going to look at ways to de stress my mind and body as focus on that and I am going to look into CBT as I do feel I need coping strategies when my mind is overthinking!
-
Katherine,
That was a perfect post you sent. Sums it all up. On the good days we know it will pass...but outhouse had days we just can't seem to fight through it all.
It's all about us learning and accepting, but I am still so angry and was we feel like this. I just hope it will get better. Today, a good day, I feel it can.
A thoughtie is inept a naughty....now that really does reassure me. Written that down, just as a prompt.
The understanding and support we all manage to give is on some days what keeps me going, along with a fab husband.
Thanks, take care xx
-
Hiya losingtheplot,
Hey sweetie.
Sorry it is still so hard for you. Do make that drs appt.
A couple of weeks ago,in my worse part of my cycle, I was asking my terrified husband to just make it stop. And I had the most awful thoughts.
So like you I am seeking further help. I know those darkest thoughts are not what I want, and not the real me. As do you sweetie.
You are making some really positive changes, both medically, and in letting some things go, to look after yourself. your son and husband are supporting you, and I always say, if we can't understand what's going on how can they... All doing our best.
And it will get better. It will.
But just to everyone today who is finding it hard. It will be better. Xxxxx
-
Hiya losingtheplot,
Hey sweetie.
Sorry it is still so hard for you. Do make that drs appt.
A couple of weeks ago,in my worse part of my cycle, I was asking my terrified husband to just make it stop. And I had the most awful thoughts.
So like you I am seeking further help. I know those darkest thoughts are not what I want, and not the real me. As do you sweetie.
You are making some really positive changes, both medically, and in letting some things go, to look after yourself. your son and husband are supporting you, and I always say, if we can't understand what's going on how can they... All doing our best.
And it will get better. It will.
But just to everyone today who is finding it hard. It will be better. Xxxxx
Thank you my lovely! Ahh big hugs I remember you posting about your awful time and how it affected you. I hope you are over the worst of it at least for now :hug: I am so sorry that you also suffer these dark thoughts it can be pretty scary and it is so frustrating that so many of us get like this.
I will make that GP appointment! And discuss starting Ad's on a low dosage to see how I go - I need some support and if that is Ad's then so be it - just to get me to be able to level my thinking alongside some CBT - I am trying to think positively I really am. And all of you on here are helping me think positively through the horrible negativeness that keeps creeping up.
Let me know how your assessment for therapy goes too xxxxxx big hugs as always
-
Hi losingtheplot, I’ve not been on here a few days but just found your thread, and just wanted to say, I know how you feel. I have days where everything just feels too much and I even sometimes feel like I wish I didn’t have anyone else to take care of but then a few days later I’m so glad they are there and I start to feel ok again. There is a saying ‘a thoughtie is not a naughty’; when we are mentally exhausted we can have strange thoughts, it’s just what happens but it’s just due to exhaustion and not how you really feel. I think it’s just a sign that you need to really do everything you can to take care of yourself and let others know how you feel so they can help you too. I really think we all feel this way sometimes. Just know you will get through this time and you are strong: you are on here, working on this, finding ways to figure things out, finding your way through. Keep posting, we are here for you. Xxxx
Thank u Katherine your reply made me cry as your so right. I do feel mentally drained by all the ups & downs and an emotional wreck most days. But I love my family and have an almost teen son who needs my support but I have so much happening to me last few years this overwhelms me.
I tell him to lean on his dad for things too. He prefers to come to me though.
This means alot to know you are all here to listen and offer advice same goes right back at you. The part that scares me though is when I have suicidal thoughts :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( as I sincerely hope it never gets to that ever. The thoughts aren't there all the time but are like a escape route for me and this morning the fight or flight thoughts were on suicide as a release. So I feel I must go back on Ads for this reason albeit it be a low dose to start with. The thoughts are more intense today and seem to be coming in waves and I've had Utrogestan for the 1st time last night. Connection possibly or would it take longer for a side effect like this? Still very earlier on the HRT regime and tying Ashwagandha to help me with stress/anxiety and like all meds/herb supplements takes time to work. I just want more better days than not better days like we all do. I am sorry you also have periods of feeling like I do hunni - its so bloody hard isn't it?
I am going to look at ways to de stress my mind and body as focus on that and I am going to look into CBT as I do feel I need coping strategies when my mind is overthinking!
Hi lovely, I’m really glad my post helped you. I’m sorry to hear you are having suicidal thoughts, Again remember these are only thoughts, you’re not going to do anything because they will pass the same as distressing feelings always do, they are always temporary, so during this time it’s really important to really look after yourself and take steps to release as much pressure off yourself as you can.
I feel like your son is old enough now to understand that his mum is feeling unwell and needs to rest and relax just like she would if she had flu. I think it is sensible to try ads if you think they will help and I think you would benefit from therapy too.
I have had all of the feelings that you have had and so I can reassure you it will pass, but please take the steps to look after yourself, you must be the priority while you feel like this.
I think it’s unlikely to be caused by utrogestan as you were already feeling low, but I would monitor how you feel on it as you go along. I am your age and take 100mg 25 days a month and that is perfect for me, it does help with sleep, so I think you will benefit from it, you may need to adjust your dosage but just see how you go. Don’t worry because if you need to you can stop taking it or adjust your dosage.
I would keep a diary of how you feel and what you are taking each day and what you have been doing and you will see patterns of what makes you feel low and then You can adjust as necessary.
I hope all this helps, I’m sending you a big hug xxx
-
Katherine,
That was a perfect post you sent. Sums it all up. On the good days we know it will pass...but outhouse had days we just can't seem to fight through it all.
It's all about us learning and accepting, but I am still so angry and was we feel like this. I just hope it will get better. Today, a good day, I feel it can.
A thoughtie is inept a naughty....now that really does reassure me. Written that down, just as a prompt.
The understanding and support we all manage to give is on some days what keeps me going, along with a fab husband.
Thanks, take care xx
Hi Sarah, thank you, I’m glad I have helped you and that you are having a good day today. Sending hugs, take care xxx
-
Hi losingtheplot, I’ve not been on here a few days but just found your thread, and just wanted to say, I know how you feel. I have days where everything just feels too much and I even sometimes feel like I wish I didn’t have anyone else to take care of but then a few days later I’m so glad they are there and I start to feel ok again. There is a saying ‘a thoughtie is not a naughty’; when we are mentally exhausted we can have strange thoughts, it’s just what happens but it’s just due to exhaustion and not how you really feel. I think it’s just a sign that you need to really do everything you can to take care of yourself and let others know how you feel so they can help you too. I really think we all feel this way sometimes. Just know you will get through this time and you are strong: you are on here, working on this, finding ways to figure things out, finding your way through. Keep posting, we are here for you. Xxxx
Thank u Katherine your reply made me cry as your so right. I do feel mentally drained by all the ups & downs and an emotional wreck most days. But I love my family and have an almost teen son who needs my support but I have so much happening to me last few years this overwhelms me.
I tell him to lean on his dad for things too. He prefers to come to me though.
This means alot to know you are all here to listen and offer advice same goes right back at you. The part that scares me though is when I have suicidal thoughts :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( as I sincerely hope it never gets to that ever. The thoughts aren't there all the time but are like a escape route for me and this morning the fight or flight thoughts were on suicide as a release. So I feel I must go back on Ads for this reason albeit it be a low dose to start with. The thoughts are more intense today and seem to be coming in waves and I've had Utrogestan for the 1st time last night. Connection possibly or would it take longer for a side effect like this? Still very earlier on the HRT regime and tying Ashwagandha to help me with stress/anxiety and like all meds/herb supplements takes time to work. I just want more better days than not better days like we all do. I am sorry you also have periods of feeling like I do hunni - its so bloody hard isn't it?
I am going to look at ways to de stress my mind and body as focus on that and I am going to look into CBT as I do feel I need coping strategies when my mind is overthinking!
Hi lovely, I’m really glad my post helped you. I’m sorry to hear you are having suicidal thoughts, Again remember these are only thoughts, you’re not going to do anything because they will pass the same as distressing feelings always do, they are always temporary, so during this time it’s really important to really look after yourself and take steps to release as much pressure off yourself as you can.
I feel like your son is old enough now to understand that his mum is feeling unwell and needs to rest and relax just like she would if she had flu. I think it is sensible to try ads if you think they will help and I think you would benefit from therapy too.
I have had all of the feelings that you have had and so I can reassure you it will pass, but please take the steps to look after yourself, you must be the priority while you feel like this.
I think it’s unlikely to be caused by utrogestan as you were already feeling low, but I would monitor how you feel on it as you go along. I am your age and take 100mg 25 days a month and that is perfect for me, it does help with sleep, so I think you will benefit from it, you may need to adjust your dosage but just see how you go. Don’t worry because if you need to you can stop taking it or adjust your dosage.
I would keep a diary of how you feel and what you are taking each day and what you have been doing and you will see patterns of what makes you feel low and then You can adjust as necessary.
I hope all this helps, I’m sending you a big hug xxx
Thank you Katherine xxxx
I don't want to burden my son as he is a worrier bless him and I feel he has enough going on with puberty etc - he is quite self sufficient in a lot of ways - trying to teach him to be independent.
I am just so up and down - had a wobble before as I am on my lunch at work and felt panic attack coming on and was so close to tears in the staff canteen!!
I appreciate you reassuring me this will pass but I do think I have an element of depression although not full blown as I am not enjoying food now either and haven't for a while and I am forcing myself to eat otherwise I get nausea and my stomach growls with hunger which also stresses me out! I am sorry that you also get these moments seems to be very common.
I have called for a GP appointment and earliest is 17th May. As I have been prescribed these Ad's previously and there was mention of them in the recent consultations I have asked Receptionist if GP could prescribe them without seeing me. So waiting to hear about that. Incidentally the panic attack arose due to me trying to sort something out for a family member to what was something straight forward ended up being stressful!!! I am so close to literally just locking myself away in the house and letting everything crash down around me as what is the flipping point!
-
Hi losingtheplot, I’ve not been on here a few days but just found your thread, and just wanted to say, I know how you feel. I have days where everything just feels too much and I even sometimes feel like I wish I didn’t have anyone else to take care of but then a few days later I’m so glad they are there and I start to feel ok again. There is a saying ‘a thoughtie is not a naughty’; when we are mentally exhausted we can have strange thoughts, it’s just what happens but it’s just due to exhaustion and not how you really feel. I think it’s just a sign that you need to really do everything you can to take care of yourself and let others know how you feel so they can help you too. I really think we all feel this way sometimes. Just know you will get through this time and you are strong: you are on here, working on this, finding ways to figure things out, finding your way through. Keep posting, we are here for you. Xxxx
Thank u Katherine your reply made me cry as your so right. I do feel mentally drained by all the ups & downs and an emotional wreck most days. But I love my family and have an almost teen son who needs my support but I have so much happening to me last few years this overwhelms me.
I tell him to lean on his dad for things too. He prefers to come to me though.
This means alot to know you are all here to listen and offer advice same goes right back at you. The part that scares me though is when I have suicidal thoughts :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( as I sincerely hope it never gets to that ever. The thoughts aren't there all the time but are like a escape route for me and this morning the fight or flight thoughts were on suicide as a release. So I feel I must go back on Ads for this reason albeit it be a low dose to start with. The thoughts are more intense today and seem to be coming in waves and I've had Utrogestan for the 1st time last night. Connection possibly or would it take longer for a side effect like this? Still very earlier on the HRT regime and tying Ashwagandha to help me with stress/anxiety and like all meds/herb supplements takes time to work. I just want more better days than not better days like we all do. I am sorry you also have periods of feeling like I do hunni - its so bloody hard isn't it?
I am going to look at ways to de stress my mind and body as focus on that and I am going to look into CBT as I do feel I need coping strategies when my mind is overthinking!
Hi lovely, I’m really glad my post helped you. I’m sorry to hear you are having suicidal thoughts, Again remember these are only thoughts, you’re not going to do anything because they will pass the same as distressing feelings always do, they are always temporary, so during this time it’s really important to really look after yourself and take steps to release as much pressure off yourself as you can.
I feel like your son is old enough now to understand that his mum is feeling unwell and needs to rest and relax just like she would if she had flu. I think it is sensible to try ads if you think they will help and I think you would benefit from therapy too.
I have had all of the feelings that you have had and so I can reassure you it will pass, but please take the steps to look after yourself, you must be the priority while you feel like this.
I think it’s unlikely to be caused by utrogestan as you were already feeling low, but I would monitor how you feel on it as you go along. I am your age and take 100mg 25 days a month and that is perfect for me, it does help with sleep, so I think you will benefit from it, you may need to adjust your dosage but just see how you go. Don’t worry because if you need to you can stop taking it or adjust your dosage.
I would keep a diary of how you feel and what you are taking each day and what you have been doing and you will see patterns of what makes you feel low and then You can adjust as necessary.
I hope all this helps, I’m sending you a big hug xxx
Thank you Katherine xxxx
I don't want to burden my son as he is a worrier bless him and I feel he has enough going on with puberty etc - he is quite self sufficient in a lot of ways - trying to teach him to be independent.
I am just so up and down - had a wobble before as I am on my lunch at work and felt panic attack coming on and was so close to tears in the staff canteen!!
I appreciate you reassuring me this will pass but I do think I have an element of depression although not full blown as I am not enjoying food now either and haven't for a while and I am forcing myself to eat otherwise I get nausea and my stomach growls with hunger which also stresses me out! I am sorry that you also get these moments seems to be very common.
I have called for a GP appointment and earliest is 17th May. As I have been prescribed these Ad's previously and there was mention of them in the recent consultations I have asked Receptionist if GP could prescribe them without seeing me. So waiting to hear about that. Incidentally the panic attack arose due to me trying to sort something out for a family member to what was something straight forward ended up being stressful!!! I am so close to literally just locking myself away in the house and letting everything crash down around me as what is the flipping point!
Hi lovely, I totally understand, it can feel difficult to prioritise yourself even temporarily when you have a caring nature and feel like it’s all or nothing, get everything right and help everyone or just shut down on everything. But with practise we can find a middle ground. I’m glad that you have contacted your gp and things are moving forward, I think you can go to A&E if you are feeling like this and they can prescribe you ads you know. If I were you I would go and tell them how you feel, I bet you come out with a prescription.
In the meantime one tip I can give when I used to have panic attacks is concentrate on the feeling of my feet on the ground, the feeling of my soles on the ground and it takes you out of your mind into your body, also putting your hand on your stomach and focussing on your breathing, you only need to do it for a matter of seconds.
for it to help. Xxx
-
Hi losingtheplot, I’ve not been on here a few days but just found your thread, and just wanted to say, I know how you feel. I have days where everything just feels too much and I even sometimes feel like I wish I didn’t have anyone else to take care of but then a few days later I’m so glad they are there and I start to feel ok again. There is a saying ‘a thoughtie is not a naughty’; when we are mentally exhausted we can have strange thoughts, it’s just what happens but it’s just due to exhaustion and not how you really feel. I think it’s just a sign that you need to really do everything you can to take care of yourself and let others know how you feel so they can help you too. I really think we all feel this way sometimes. Just know you will get through this time and you are strong: you are on here, working on this, finding ways to figure things out, finding your way through. Keep posting, we are here for you. Xxxx
Thank u Katherine your reply made me cry as your so right. I do feel mentally drained by all the ups & downs and an emotional wreck most days. But I love my family and have an almost teen son who needs my support but I have so much happening to me last few years this overwhelms me.
I tell him to lean on his dad for things too. He prefers to come to me though.
This means alot to know you are all here to listen and offer advice same goes right back at you. The part that scares me though is when I have suicidal thoughts :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( as I sincerely hope it never gets to that ever. The thoughts aren't there all the time but are like a escape route for me and this morning the fight or flight thoughts were on suicide as a release. So I feel I must go back on Ads for this reason albeit it be a low dose to start with. The thoughts are more intense today and seem to be coming in waves and I've had Utrogestan for the 1st time last night. Connection possibly or would it take longer for a side effect like this? Still very earlier on the HRT regime and tying Ashwagandha to help me with stress/anxiety and like all meds/herb supplements takes time to work. I just want more better days than not better days like we all do. I am sorry you also have periods of feeling like I do hunni - its so bloody hard isn't it?
I am going to look at ways to de stress my mind and body as focus on that and I am going to look into CBT as I do feel I need coping strategies when my mind is overthinking!
Hi lovely, I’m really glad my post helped you. I’m sorry to hear you are having suicidal thoughts, Again remember these are only thoughts, you’re not going to do anything because they will pass the same as distressing feelings always do, they are always temporary, so during this time it’s really important to really look after yourself and take steps to release as much pressure off yourself as you can.
I feel like your son is old enough now to understand that his mum is feeling unwell and needs to rest and relax just like she would if she had flu. I think it is sensible to try ads if you think they will help and I think you would benefit from therapy too.
I have had all of the feelings that you have had and so I can reassure you it will pass, but please take the steps to look after yourself, you must be the priority while you feel like this.
I think it’s unlikely to be caused by utrogestan as you were already feeling low, but I would monitor how you feel on it as you go along. I am your age and take 100mg 25 days a month and that is perfect for me, it does help with sleep, so I think you will benefit from it, you may need to adjust your dosage but just see how you go. Don’t worry because if you need to you can stop taking it or adjust your dosage.
I would keep a diary of how you feel and what you are taking each day and what you have been doing and you will see patterns of what makes you feel low and then You can adjust as necessary.
I hope all this helps, I’m sending you a big hug xxx
Thank you Katherine xxxx
I don't want to burden my son as he is a worrier bless him and I feel he has enough going on with puberty etc - he is quite self sufficient in a lot of ways - trying to teach him to be independent.
I am just so up and down - had a wobble before as I am on my lunch at work and felt panic attack coming on and was so close to tears in the staff canteen!!
I appreciate you reassuring me this will pass but I do think I have an element of depression although not full blown as I am not enjoying food now either and haven't for a while and I am forcing myself to eat otherwise I get nausea and my stomach growls with hunger which also stresses me out! I am sorry that you also get these moments seems to be very common.
I have called for a GP appointment and earliest is 17th May. As I have been prescribed these Ad's previously and there was mention of them in the recent consultations I have asked Receptionist if GP could prescribe them without seeing me. So waiting to hear about that. Incidentally the panic attack arose due to me trying to sort something out for a family member to what was something straight forward ended up being stressful!!! I am so close to literally just locking myself away in the house and letting everything crash down around me as what is the flipping point!
Hi lovely, I totally understand, it can feel difficult to prioritise yourself even temporarily when you have a caring nature and feel like it’s all or nothing, get everything right and help everyone or just shut down on everything. But with practise we can find a middle ground. I’m glad that you have contacted your gp and things are moving forward, I think you can go to A&E if you are feeling like this and they can prescribe you ads you know. If I were you I would go and tell them how you feel, I bet you come out with a prescription.
In the meantime one tip I can give when I used to have panic attacks is concentrate on the feeling of my feet on the ground, the feeling of my soles on the ground and it takes you out of your mind into your body, also putting your hand on your stomach and focussing on your breathing, you only need to do it for a matter of seconds.
for it to help. Xxx
Thank you Katherine - its coming in waves so I will try and breath through it - I just freeze if I have a panic attack outside of my home - :o
-
So an update my Gp surgery have just called me to say GP has sent a prescription to chemist for Ads. I now feel perfectly back to myself no panic/anxiety/ low mood!!!!
This is such a mind game. I now think I will start on low dose of Ads and continue HRT. Hopefully this combination works for me.
-
I am so pleased your GP as issued you some ADs. I think it is a good idea to start them despite you having a good day today as they do take a few weeks before they start to work.
Lovely to hear today is a good day for you. :)
-
Hey, great news your GP has sent a prescription over :)
What anti d do you take ?
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That's really great news, I'm really pleased for you. xxx :)
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Hey, great news your GP has sent a prescription over :)
What anti d do you take ?
Prozac or its known as Fluoxetine. I haven't had time to pick them up after work. I still have that awful jittery internal feeling though its just so strange like I have a washing machine drum churning inside!
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I am so pleased your GP as issued you some ADs. I think it is a good idea to start them despite you having a good day today as they do take a few weeks before they start to work.
Lovely to hear today is a good day for you. :)
Thank you its ended better than it started but have internal jittery feeling like internal shakes do u get that?
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That's really great news, I'm really pleased for you. xxx :)
[/quote
Thanks Katherine I still feel its hormonal as comes in waves however no harm in trying Ads alongside as quality of life is so important. I may find they help I may feel no diff but won't know till I try
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I am so pleased your GP as issued you some ADs. I think it is a good idea to start them despite you having a good day today as they do take a few weeks before they start to work.
Lovely to hear today is a good day for you. :)
Thank you its ended better than it started but have internal jittery feeling like internal shakes do u get that?
Yes, each time I have started an AD, increased the dose or decrease it, I always get side effects. I think it can be hard for the body at first but once the body gets used to it those feelings should go. When I tried prozac I was very jittery. I think that is a common side effect with that one. Hopefully it will pass for you soon.
-
That's a good outcome for today from your drs. They are listening and taking you seriously.
Very good advice from Katherine too regarding a&e and also tips to help ground yourself when you feel a panic attacks starting.
Are you still getting an appt rainfall with a g.p too? I wonder if it may help further financially discuss this with you in case there is more to help you.
Am Please hounslow have the AD's to support you. As others said, all medication takes a while to feel the full benefits, but even knowing you have this prescription may bring a bit of relief to you.
A difficult day for you, but a good result, and I always strongly believe that it takes strength to realise when we need extra help and then to ask for it. Yep, no matter how you sometimes feel, you DO have strength.
Take care xx
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I am so pleased your GP as issued you some ADs. I think it is a good idea to start them despite you having a good day today as they do take a few weeks before they start to work.
Lovely to hear today is a good day for you. :)
Thank you its ended better than it started but have internal jittery feeling like internal shakes do u get that?
Yes, each time I have started an AD, increased the dose or decrease it, I always get side effects. I think it can be hard for the body at first but once the body gets used to it those feelings should go. When I tried prozac I was very jittery. I think that is a common side effect with that one. Hopefully it will pass for you soon.
Just to clarify I haven't started Ads yet didn't get to chemist in time to pick them up. I get this jittery internal feeling on and off all the time over past few weeks and it was really intense before. Have you experienced that before? This has been happening prior to me starting any HRT
-
That's a good outcome for today from your drs. They are listening and taking you seriously.
Very good advice from Katherine too regarding a&e and also tips to help ground yourself when you feel a panic attacks starting.
Are you still getting an appt rainfall with a g.p too? I wonder if it may help further financially discuss this with you in case there is more to help you.
Am Please hounslow have the AD's to support you. As others said, all medication takes a while to feel the full benefits, but even knowing you have this prescription may bring a bit of relief to you.
A difficult day for you, but a good result, and I always strongly believe that it takes strength to realise when we need extra help and then to ask for it. Yep, no matter how you sometimes feel, you DO have strength.
Take care xx
Ahh hunni you always lift me back up when I have these difficult moments. My GP is lovely and hasn't made me wait till 17th May for the next appointment with her. I had a strong feeling she would prescribe these Ads as I have had them in the past. So tonight I have been laughing and playing with my 2 dogs and enjoying life again!! I just don't get this at all???? This isn't depression like I have had it in past I never would get like this from one moment to the next its was just constant bleak feelings, uncontrollable crying not sleeping then sleeping too much. I am soooo confused ??? ???
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The jittery feeling sounds like anxiety. It is horrid and very uncomfortable.
I notice in peri moods can be up and down so perhaps this is what is happening with you. It is lovely you enjoyed time with your dogs. :)
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First apologies for all the ridiculous auto corrects in my post. Don't always remember to check them first.. They can make my sound a proper weird person .... ;D
I can't always fathom how our moods can alter so rapidly either. All I can think is there's just so much going on, physically, mentally and in 'normal day to day life' we just to into overload?? The unstability can be one of the worse thing... Feeling pretty much okay can give me false hope that it's better and then I suddenly crash again.
Am hoping I can figure some of this out if I get the therapy referral. I like to be armed with knowledge and better understanding. If I know what I am actually dealing with and why, it helps me try to work on ways to work with it if that makes sense?
I want to say thanks to everyone for their honesty in expressing some of their dark thoughts they have at times. It shocked and scared me a couple of weeks ago to suddenly, briefly, feel that bad, when I know that's not the 'real me', and the honesty I read on here from others has really helped me realise that sadly this isn't always uncommon. It also pushed me to seek for counselling.
I too feel very supported.
Enjoy playing with your daft dogs! Right now you feel sooo good, so laugh. You deserve it. xx
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First apologies for all the ridiculous auto corrects in my post. Don't always remember to check them first.. They can make my sound a proper weird person .... ;D
I can't always fathom how our moods can alter so rapidly either. All I can think is there's just so much going on, physically, mentally and in 'normal day to day life' we just to into overload?? The unstability can be one of the worse thing... Feeling pretty much okay can give me false hope that it's better and then I suddenly crash again.
Am hoping I can figure some of this out if I get the therapy referral. I like to be armed with knowledge and better understanding. If I know what I am actually dealing with and why, it helps me try to work on ways to work with it if that makes sense?
I want to say thanks to everyone for their honesty in expressing some of their dark thoughts they have at times. It shocked and scared me a couple of weeks ago to suddenly, briefly, feel that bad, when I know that's not the 'real me', and the honesty I read on here from others has really helped me realise that sadly this isn't always uncommon. It also pushed me to seek for counselling.
I too feel very supported.
Enjoy playing with your daft dogs! Right now you feel sooo good, so laugh. You deserve it. xx
That is so lovely to hear. :)
PS, I did wonder why you mentioned Hounslow but the realised it must have been a mistake. ;D
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The jittery feeling sounds like anxiety. It is horrid and very uncomfortable.
I notice in peri moods can be up and down so perhaps this is what is happening with you. It is lovely you enjoyed time with your dogs. :)
Ahh ok I see yes it sounds possible. I dont have periods on my current contraceptive so can't judge whether I am peri or post. Ahh I love my dogs. They both know when I am not myself and cuddle into me so much they are amazing at making me feel so much better
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First apologies for all the ridiculous auto corrects in my post. Don't always remember to check them first.. They can make my sound a proper weird person .... ;D
I can't always fathom how our moods can alter so rapidly either. All I can think is there's just so much going on, physically, mentally and in 'normal day to day life' we just to into overload?? The unstability can be one of the worse thing... Feeling pretty much okay can give me false hope that it's better and then I suddenly crash again.
Am hoping I can figure some of this out if I get the therapy referral. I like to be armed with knowledge and better understanding. If I know what I am actually dealing with and why, it helps me try to work on ways to work with it if that makes sense?
I want to say thanks to everyone for their honesty in expressing some of their dark thoughts they have at times. It shocked and scared me a couple of weeks ago to suddenly, briefly, feel that bad, when I know that's not the 'real me', and the honesty I read on here from others has really helped me realise that sadly this isn't always uncommon. It also pushed me to seek for counselling.
I too feel very supported.
Enjoy playing with your daft dogs! Right now you feel sooo good, so laugh. You deserve it. xx
Ahh hunni I so relate to the see saw of feeling good to crashing back down as you know from my posts. Today was very difficult for me and yet again the support has been just amazing. This is a lifeline for me being on this forum it really is. I hope I don't dip as low as I did today and if I do I will read back on this post with all the lovely kind advice and words and know its happening to alot of people. My dogs are daft ;D ;D ;D ;D like their mam ;D ;D ;D and as for typos no one here cares about that hunni we are just keeping ourselves afloat so no issues with that ;D Also I couldn't of put it better myself about the honesty and how much you have all shared I am sorry for posting so much today but you have all got me thru it and I will help anyone anyway I can if you need a shoulder/rant etc xx I sincerely couldn't ask for a better group of ladies to have supported me today xxx
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Yeah. so you all just made me cry. It's all about sharing and supporting, whether it be fantastic practical advice or that desperately needed shoulder to cry on.
Never apologise for thinking you are posting too much in a day. There's always going to be someone here for you. And thankfully for any of us.😍
And where the hell did the word Hounslow get into a previous post???! Glad I made Flossie smile even if in a bewildered way! I just hope it was a typo and not some random thought screeching through my poor mind. It's been a long long day.. 😂
Xx
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I can feel a group hug coming on :hug: :)
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Yeah. so you all just made me cry. It's all about sharing and supporting, whether it be fantastic practical advice or that desperately needed shoulder to cry on.
Never apologise for thinking you are posting too much in a day. There's always going to be someone here for you. And thankfully for any of us.😍
And where the hell did the word Hounslow get into a previous post???! Glad I made Flossie smile even if in a bewildered way! I just hope it was a typo and not some random thought screeching through my poor mind. It's been a long long day.. 😂
Xx
I must admit Hounslow did have me a little confused but did make me chuckle too ;D ;D ;D ;D.
We are an emotional bunch its these bloody hormones ;D ;D ;D ;D can't do without them but they test us each and everyday xx
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I can feel a group hug coming on :hug: :)
I like this :-* Xxxx
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Oh I am definitely in.... Always big hugs to all.
Let's hope today is a happy day. Feeling optimistic so far....xx
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Oh I am definitely in.... Always big hugs to all.
Let's hope today is a happy day. Feeling optimistic so far....xx
Hi my lovely,
Today will be a good day - armed with all the advice from you lovely ladies and taking it slowly and not letting my brain rush ahead. Take care sweetie xxxxx
I will pick my prescription up today and am I undecided whether to wait until the 3 months is up on my HRT to see if that calms things - however from what I have found on this forum not many people report HRT helping with anxiety/Panic/Brain fog. I know everyone is different though. I just don't want to dip as low as I did yesterday but if it is hormonal then Ad may well not help
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Hello ladies.
I thought I would add that the internal shaking feeling and the mood changes are definitely menopause symptoms according to my trusty Meno book. It is written by a female MD who notes that they are very common and are due to hormonal changes.
Take care ladies.
K.
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Hope you don’t mind me jumping on this thread.
I’ve just been reading through all your posts and they do really help me so much too. I can empathise with so many of you.
Most mornings I wake up feel awful, there was a thread a while back called ‘Morning dread’ which is definitely one of my many symptoms. It’s like someone injects me with poison overnight as I can go to bed feeling ok. It usually lifts during the day but sometimes not.
Oh and yes …. moods changing literally from one minute to the next, to feeing relatively ok to then wanting to just shut myself away. Today I woke up feeling ok ish, to then feeling rubbish (depressed) out whilst walking my dog, never had that before!
Anyway, I just wanted to give all my love and hugs to you all. This menopause lark isn’t fair :(
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Hope you don’t mind me jumping on this thread.
I’ve just been reading through all your posts and they do really help me so much too. I can empathise with so many of you.
Most mornings I wake up feel awful, there was a thread a while back called ‘Morning dread’ which is definitely one of my many symptoms. It’s like someone injects me with poison overnight as I can go to bed feeling ok. It usually lifts during the day but sometimes not.
Oh and yes …. moods changing literally from one minute to the next, to feeing relatively ok to then wanting to just shut myself away. Today I woke up feeling ok ish, to then feeling rubbish (depressed) out whilst walking my dog, never had that before!
Anyway, I just wanted to give all my love and hugs to you all. This menopause lark isn’t fair :(
Sorry to hear this ToriiJ. It is rotten feeling so low out the blue.
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Hello ladies.
I thought I would add that the internal shaking feeling and the mood changes are definitely menopause symptoms according to my trusty Meno book. It is written by a female MD who notes that they are very common and are due to hormonal changes.
Take care ladies.
K.
Ahh thanks for this hunni that's reassured me as I was starting to worry
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Hope you don’t mind me jumping on this thread.
I’ve just been reading through all your posts and they do really help me so much too. I can empathise with so many of you.
Most mornings I wake up feel awful, there was a thread a while back called ‘Morning dread’ which is definitely one of my many symptoms. It’s like someone injects me with poison overnight as I can go to bed feeling ok. It usually lifts during the day but sometimes not.
Oh and yes …. moods changing literally from one minute to the next, to feeing relatively ok to then wanting to just shut myself away. Today I woke up feeling ok ish, to then feeling rubbish (depressed) out whilst walking my dog, never had that before!
Anyway, I just wanted to give all my love and hugs to you all. This menopause lark isn’t fair :(
Hi hunni
This thread is open to anyone and everyone that wishes to jump aboard :) We are all here to support each other and I am so sorry that you also suffer like this. Its the see saw effect that seems so debilitating- on a plus note I bet your dog is very cute! :) and possibly senses when you are feeling low/not yourself like my lovely poochies do x
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Aww thank you and thanks for your reply. Yes my dog is very cute (aren’t they all) He does get extra cuddles when I’m feeling bad. I love my cats too but they don’t appreciate the cuddles so much :)
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Aww thank you and thanks for your reply. Yes my dog is very cute (aren’t they all) He does get extra cuddles when I’m feeling bad. I love my cats too but they don’t appreciate the cuddles so much :)
Hope your feeling better than you were earlier. Xx
Yes all furbabies are very cute :) Cats now cuddles are on their terms ;D. Dogs happy for cuddles all the time well mine are anyway.
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Hi Tori,
This seems a thread that affects a lot of us, think we have been on another one together as well!
It's the ok one minute, feel so bad the next minute that seems to be one of the worse most unsettling symptoms as it all seems so random. Tears out of nowhere still get me too.
I think it is CKLD who says the morning dread may be because of cortisol I think, maybe check in search for this? I may not have that right.
Have upped my patch to 100, and so far I seem a bit better mood wise. But as My moods are very cyclical I am still a bit worried about a potential crash in the next few days. Just happy to be okayish over the last few days.
Sadly don't have a dog so my cats get cuddles and kisses whether they want them or not I admit a tad selfishly. 😾😾
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My cat knows when I’m upset and snuggles right up to me or lays on me , she seems to know when I’m ill too, they are so clever.
I get the morning anxiety thing too, I think it’s definitely linked with cortisol because by 2pm I feel good right into the evening. I also find it hard to get going in the morning.
On a bad day though I just feel bad all day but there is definitely a daily cycle going on hormonally that affects my anxiety levels …
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Hi Tori,
This seems a thread that affects a lot of us, think we have been on another one together as well!
It's the ok one minute, feel so bad the next minute that seems to be one of the worse most unsettling symptoms as it all seems so random. Tears out of nowhere still get me too.
I think it is CKLD who says the morning dread may be because of cortisol I think, maybe check in search for this? I may not have that right.
Have upped my patch to 100, and so far I seem a bit better mood wise. But as My moods are very cyclical I am still a bit worried about a potential crash in the next few days. Just happy to be okayish over the last few days.
Sadly don't have a dog so my cats get cuddles and kisses whether they want them or not I admit a tad selfishly. 😾😾
Hey hunni fingers crossed the increased patch helps you xxx Easier said than done try not to focus on when the dip may happen hopefully with the increase it might not. Cats are lovely I love all animals they melt my heart.
Ive had a better day today with emotional symptoms but my goodness the burning pain in my vagina and higher has been intense! Its been there past couple of weeks but this morning and all day has been unbearable!
I got prescribed some Ovestin last year from GP but never used any till tonight as never been this bad. This lovely peri meno is hitting me from all areas at once now a sore burning fadge! The joys !! Luckily Ive read some v informative posts on here so yet another hurdle to cross :o
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Get yourself .on that Ovestin girl!
That dryness and soreness was the first thing that lead me to realising peri has hit me.. Think it was 3 years ago. Like a lot of ladies on here I use Ovestin most nights. Only internal for me, other wise it stings too much, so Sylk on the outer. Sorry if tmi but for me, these give instant results.
If I miss a dose of even two I sure feel it. As does my husband, but that probably is tmi.. Seriously, it makes a huge improvement and once one symptom can be sorted easily and with quick relief, it can only help us lessen the weight of symptoms.
use it regularly, works so well for me.
😍 xx
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Is Ovestin cream used instead of a tablet? I use an estradiol tablet with applicator twice a week but still feel dry on the outside. I’m allergic to aloe Vera though so need something without that. Can you get sylk prescribed and is it for everyday use or just for bedroom activities?
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Get yourself .on that Ovestin girl!
That dryness and soreness was the first thing that lead me to realising peri has hit me.. Think it was 3 years ago. Like a lot of ladies on here I use Ovestin most nights. Only internal for me, other wise it stings too much, so Sylk on the outer. Sorry if tmi but for me, these give instant results.
If I miss a dose of even two I sure feel it. As does my husband, but that probably is tmi.. Seriously, it makes a huge improvement and once one symptom can be sorted easily and with quick relief, it can only help us lessen the weight of symptoms.
use it regularly, works so well for me.
😍 xx
Thanks hunni had this awful sympton for a while too but never linked it with peri! Just thought bout of cystitis I have used some last night so lets see how I go. Burning back this morning :'( :'( :'( so uncomfortable! X
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Is Ovestin cream used instead of a tablet? I use an estradiol tablet with applicator twice a week but still feel dry on the outside. I’m allergic to aloe Vera though so need something without that. Can you get sylk prescribed and is it for everyday use or just for bedroom activities?
Sylk can be used as a moisturiser. I am not sure if it is available at the moment as it was recalled but you could always try Yes VM. I apply Yes VM every day and also use some to help me insert my Ovestin applicator.
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Get yourself .on that Ovestin girl!
That dryness and soreness was the first thing that lead me to realising peri has hit me.. Think it was 3 years ago. Like a lot of ladies on here I use Ovestin most nights. Only internal for me, other wise it stings too much, so Sylk on the outer. Sorry if tmi but for me, these give instant results.
If I miss a dose of even two I sure feel it. As does my husband, but that probably is tmi.. Seriously, it makes a huge improvement and once one symptom can be sorted easily and with quick relief, it can only help us lessen the weight of symptoms.
use it regularly, works so well for me.
😍 xx
Thanks hunni had this awful sympton for a while too but never linked it with peri! Just thought bout of cystitis I have used some last night so lets see how I go. Burning back this morning :'( :'( :'( so uncomfortable! X
There are lots of threads on here about VA with some helpful tips. I am sorry your GP did not tell you about VA and you had to suffer. I had the same experience and only realised what it was thanks to this forum.
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I will try the Ovestin for 2 weeks and book a follow up with GP thank you Flossi.
Sorry if tmi but my vagina internally and externally feels very inflammed and so sore.
I have read the other posts on here and "The Burning Club" post is very informative too - does anyone know roughly how long before Ovestin can start to relieve the burning? I appreciate I have only tried it for 1 night so far but just curious x
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I will try the Ovestin for 2 weeks and book a follow up with GP thank you Flossi.
Sorry if tmi but my vagina internally and externally feels very inflammed and so sore.
I have read the other posts on here and "The Burning Club" post is very informative too - does anyone know roughly how long before Ovestin can start to relieve the burning? I appreciate I have only tried it for 1 night so far but just curious x
Nothing is too much information on here so do not worry about that. It is different for everybody but it is good you are using it daily. Do you have any vaginal moisturiser? When I apply Ovestin to the outer area I find it helpful to mix a little with Yes VM.
I also wash in emollient. I apply some to the vulva, wash it off in the shower and then reapply some to act as a barrier. I stopped using shower gel completely and wash my whole body with emollient now. I also stopped having baths and switched to showers to avoid prolonged contact with water.
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Ahh ok I don't have any vaginal mos and will buy some just anything that helps! I never use shower gel on my privates but can imagine when having a shower any remains of shower gel on body will get washed down with the water to this area!
I will try some YES thank you xxx
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Ahh ok I don't have any vaginal mos and will buy some just anything that helps! I never use shower gel on my privates but can imagine when having a shower any remains of shower gel on body will get washed down with the water to this area!
Is Yes unperfumed etc ?
That is my worry about shower gel, it dripping down onto the private area. I find it easier to just wash in emollient to avoid the risk for myself. Yes VM is an unscented moisturiser. I buy mine from Amazon. You can always have a look at their website as I think they send out free samples.
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I use femfresh, the unscented one, it never hurts or stings. It’s like a shower gel but designed for the private area.
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Thank you xx
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Hi Katherine,
I use unscented baby wipes to clean with. Am religious not to use anything perfumed either, and showers not baths. Then I use unscented Sanex which seems ok for me.
As for Sylk,should it be available again soon, I use it as an external moisturizers ,around vulva as Ovestin on outer parts stings a little for me. But I also use Sylk in the -ahem- bedroom department too as I prefer the feel from other lubricants, and it is far kinder on my skin,externally and internally. Without putting anyone off their lunch, a dab inside myself, and a playful dab or two on husband\toys. Sorry for that, but let's be honest.
Sorry if that's a bit much, but with everything else we deal with, bedroom stuff when we're up for it, needs to be as comfy and enjoyable as possible. 😍
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Hi Sarah, thanks for your message.
I’m glad your mood is a bit better so far and hoping it stays that way. I’m very much like you and my moods appear to be cyclical. I seem to be having a bit of a dip now but have increased my gel so hoping it stops myself from spiralling. It seems the further I spiral downwards the harder it is to get back up again.
I am also going to look into cortisol levels, another thing and one of many things I’ve learnt from this forum.
I like to cuddle my cats selfishly too :) although they are not keen I think they know I love them.
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Hi Sarah,
Thank for the info, I will try the products you suggested. Don't worry about saying too much, it is all very relevant and helpful, the more info the better. xxx
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Hi Katherine,
I use unscented baby wipes to clean with. Am religious not to use anything perfumed either, and showers not baths. Then I use unscented Sanex which seems ok for me.
As for Sylk,should it be available again soon, I use it as an external moisturizers ,around vulva as Ovestin on outer parts stings a little for me. But I also use Sylk in the -ahem- bedroom department too as I prefer the feel from other lubricants, and it is far kinder on my skin,externally and internally. Without putting anyone off their lunch, a dab inside myself, and a playful dab or two on husband\toys. Sorry for that, but let's be honest.
Sorry if that's a bit much, but with everything else we deal with, bedroom stuff when we're up for it, needs to be as comfy and enjoyable as possible. 😍
You go girl !!! Not tmi and something I will use once things calm down below
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;) just saying it now I see it! Least using these products give almost instant relief on using. Think Sylk is not in production right now, but hope it's back on prescriptions\for sale again soon. Worth checking other threads on VA\ dryness too for alternatives.😍
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
So the last 2 /3 days have been just crippling! I am taking your advice and the advice of my family and taking some time off work! This is all getting on top of me and I honestly feel like I am having a breakdown. Ive started taking Ads this is only day 2. I have really felt scared today and yesterday that when I am getting the downs episodes its just affecting my life so much that I really do not want to be here anymore.
I really hope I can get through this but this morning and the thoughts in my head were very dark :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
So the last 2 /3 days have been just crippling! I am taking your advice and the advice of my family and taking some time off work! This is all getting on top of me and I honestly feel like I am having a breakdown. Ive started taking Ads this is only day 2. I have really felt scared today and yesterday that when I am getting the downs episodes its just affecting my life so much that I really do not want to be here anymore.
I really hope I can get through this but this morning and the thoughts in my head were very dark :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
So sorry the last few days have been so hard. Do you remember last week when you felt great? You will feel this way again. This is a horrid blip but it will pass.
It is good you have started the ADs and hopefully they will not take long to kick in.
Its really tough to feel so low but it really will pass. You have done the right thing in taking time off work. This is going to give you the time you need to rest.
How are the dark thoughts now?
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Hi Losingtheplot
I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through such a horrible time again. I stand with you on this crappy journey that is menopause :( As Flossie says remember you will feel good again, even though your brain is telling you you never will. These dips are just awful aren’t they? Whenever I hit a low I really feel each time that this is it, I am never going to feel better again and each time it passes and it will for you, even though you don’t feel that way right now.
I am on ADs and have been for years, I’m not sure they are helping anymore, perhaps I need to change.
Remember this will pass, whether it passes quickly or slowly, it will pass.
Thinking of you x
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
So the last 2 /3 days have been just crippling! I am taking your advice and the advice of my family and taking some time off work! This is all getting on top of me and I honestly feel like I am having a breakdown. Ive started taking Ads this is only day 2. I have really felt scared today and yesterday that when I am getting the downs episodes its just affecting my life so much that I really do not want to be here anymore.
I really hope I can get through this but this morning and the thoughts in my head were very dark :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
So sorry the last few days have been so hard. Do you remember last week when you felt great? You will feel this way again. This is a horrid blip but it will pass.
It is good you have started the ADs and hopefully they will not take long to kick in.
Its really tough to feel so low but it really will pass. You have done the right thing in taking time off work. This is going to give you the time you need to rest.
How are the dark thoughts now?
Thank you yes its what I need sometime to look after myself as I really am not coping well at the moment x yes I remember when this happened a few days back but this time the dark thoughts were more intense. They have gone now for the past few hours which has been such a relief as I kept trying to distract myself from them.
I went food shopping earlier and had an elderly driver in car park.shout at me for not looking where I was walking I did cross at the pedestrian crossing but veered off looking for my parked car. I apologised to him and he continued to rant. He could see I was on the verge of tears so I bluntly said 3 times while.he continued to rant "I have apologised to you so can we please end this now" it took all I had not to burst into tears in a public car park or then go.off and something more..... Luckily I am feeling different to earlier.now
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Hi Losingtheplot
I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through such a horrible time again. I stand with you on this crappy journey that is menopause :( As Flossie says remember you will feel good again, even though your brain is telling you you never will. These dips are just awful aren’t they? Whenever I hit a low I really feel each time that this is it, I am never going to feel better again and each time it passes and it will for you, even though you don’t feel that way right now.
I am on ADs and have been for years, I’m not sure they are helping anymore, perhaps I need to change.
Remember this will pass, whether it passes quickly or slowly, it will pass.
Thinking of you x
Thank you and I am so.sorry you suffer like this too. I am trying to train my mind into pushing the thoughts away I am taking Utrogestan currently on my HRT regime so can't say whether its contributing to my bad thoughts as in making them more intense but I do feel calmer than I.did earlier. I appreciate the reassurance from you too xx
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Hi sweetie,
Am relieved you are starting to feel a little better later in this day. Sadly many of us know these dark thoughts, and in our more rational days we know that they do get better, as you yourself know. But whilst we are in these moments, these crashes, we cannot see clearly.
As Tori said, and she experiences these moods too, and she has to work through them knowing they do pass.
You handled yourself well in that car park, kept as calm as you could whilst feeling so low.
And look at you now, you are taking time out, started the AD's YOU are making these changes.
You are so strong. You really are.
Take each day as it comes. And know people care.
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
So the last 2 /3 days have been just crippling! I am taking your advice and the advice of my family and taking some time off work! This is all getting on top of me and I honestly feel like I am having a breakdown. Ive started taking Ads this is only day 2. I have really felt scared today and yesterday that when I am getting the downs episodes its just affecting my life so much that I really do not want to be here anymore.
I really hope I can get through this but this morning and the thoughts in my head were very dark :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
So sorry the last few days have been so hard. Do you remember last week when you felt great? You will feel this way again. This is a horrid blip but it will pass.
It is good you have started the ADs and hopefully they will not take long to kick in.
Its really tough to feel so low but it really will pass. You have done the right thing in taking time off work. This is going to give you the time you need to rest.
How are the dark thoughts now?
Thank you yes its what I need sometime to look after myself as I really am not coping well at the moment x yes I remember when this happened a few days back but this time the dark thoughts were more intense. They have gone now for the past few hours which has been such a relief as I kept trying to distract myself from them.
I went food shopping earlier and had an elderly driver in car park.shout at me for not looking where I was walking I did cross at the pedestrian crossing but veered off looking for my parked car. I apologised to him and he continued to rant. He could see I was on the verge of tears so I bluntly said 3 times while.he continued to rant "I have apologised to you so can we please end this now" it took all I had not to burst into tears in a public car park or then go.off and something more..... Luckily I am feeling different to earlier.now
You are very brave to stick up for yourself with the mean driver. I am so glad the dark thoughts are not present right now. Have you spoken to your family about these thoughts? If not then please make an appointment to tell your GP. Such thoughts should not be ignored.
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I can understand why you felt upset about your son not confiding in you. You love him and were worried about him. That is natural. Do you think it may help to have a bit of time off work on mental health grounds? I understand this may not be possible.
It does not sound to me like you are feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like you are overwhelmed and going through a lot. Meno really messes with our hormones and this does have an effect on our mood.
So the last 2 /3 days have been just crippling! I am taking your advice and the advice of my family and taking some time off work! This is all getting on top of me and I honestly feel like I am having a breakdown. Ive started taking Ads this is only day 2. I have really felt scared today and yesterday that when I am getting the downs episodes its just affecting my life so much that I really do not want to be here anymore.
I really hope I can get through this but this morning and the thoughts in my head were very dark :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
So sorry the last few days have been so hard. Do you remember last week when you felt great? You will feel this way again. This is a horrid blip but it will pass.
It is good you have started the ADs and hopefully they will not take long to kick in.
Its really tough to feel so low but it really will pass. You have done the right thing in taking time off work. This is going to give you the time you need to rest.
How are the dark thoughts now?
Thank you yes its what I need sometime to look after myself as I really am not coping well at the moment x yes I remember when this happened a few days back but this time the dark thoughts were more intense. They have gone now for the past few hours which has been such a relief as I kept trying to distract myself from them.
I went food shopping earlier and had an elderly driver in car park.shout at me for not looking where I was walking I did cross at the pedestrian crossing but veered off looking for my parked car. I apologised to him and he continued to rant. He could see I was on the verge of tears so I bluntly said 3 times while.he continued to rant "I have apologised to you so can we please end this now" it took all I had not to burst into tears in a public car park or then go.off and something more..... Luckily I am feeling different to earlier.now
You are very brave to stick up for yourself with the mean driver. I am so glad the dark thoughts are not present right now. Have you spoken to your family about these thoughts? If not then please make an appointment to tell your GP. Such thoughts should not be ignored.
The thoughts are not there all the time or everyday and I do have a history of depression and anxiety. I have shared things with my family but not about the dark thoughts as today was the first day i have had them so intensely. I won't act on them though as I have been here before when I had post natal depression. But that was a black cloud all day every day and this isn't a constant feeling nevertheless I will let my GP know. I really hope the Ads help me like they have in the past. Thank u for reaching out to me x
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So sorry this is a familiar feeling to you. I am glad you know the signs and what to look for and will ensure you reach out. Even if it just on here. We all care and want to support you.
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Yes it is I have suffered depression and anxiety since 13 years of age. But this does feel different as its not everyday I feel like this which is the hardest part as I never know when it will hit me.
So feel this is hormonal however with my history I do feel trying Ads too is sensible. Thank you once again xxxx
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Yes it is I have suffered depression and anxiety since 13 years of age. But this does feel different as its not everyday I feel like this which is the hardest part as I never know when it will hit me.
So feel this is hormonal however with my history I do feel trying Ads too is sensible. Thank you once again xxxx
You are so welcome. I hope things improve soon once the AD's kick in. :)
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You said the other day that you would speak to a g.p about maybe some form of counselling? If may be worth talking about this still.
It was a 3 weeks ago when I had,.of the blue a suicidal thought, just fleeting but scared me so much that made me know I had no choice but to seek further help.
Like you I would never act on this this, but Flossie is right. You should speak up about this. To talk of through with someone who is trained to listen and advise.
I know, like you, what depression is and this feels different. And I trust you still understand you are in no way weak or at 'fault'. Please.do seek further help, you are doing so well, getting hrt regime altered, on Ad's which will take time to give the full effect to work.
As Flossie says, (such wise words as always) people on here care and support you - as you in turn do for us. Xx
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Hi SarahT
Thank u hunnixxxx I can imagine just how scary that awful episode would of been for you. And you are doing amazing at getting help with your therapy Thsnk you for being so honest and sharing this with me Xxxx I have felt calmer these past few hours. How can I feel so low and dark then totally different second part of the day??? The Ads will hopefully help me as they have in past. Understand they take time. I have an appointment with GP in just under 2 weeks time and will explain to her how I have been feeling.
Thank u for all being there Flossie and SarahT I just needed reassurance to make me get thru my earlier scary meltdown you really are both so lovely and I know you have your own awful symptoms to contend with so I really appreciate your posts big love to you both xxx
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I can feel like that too, one part of the day just feeling terrible with no hope and then towards the evening I can feel ok and then the next day the cycle starts again. I don’t get it.
Anyway, really hoping you ladies are doing ok today, if not remember it won’t stay this way. That’s what I tell myself all the time :-*
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Hi SarahT
Thank u hunnixxxx I can imagine just how scary that awful episode would of been for you. And you are doing amazing at getting help with your therapy Thsnk you for being so honest and sharing this with me Xxxx I have felt calmer these past few hours. How can I feel so low and dark then totally different second part of the day??? The Ads will hopefully help me as they have in past. Understand they take time. I have an appointment with GP in just under 2 weeks time and will explain to her how I have been feeling.
Thank u for all being there Flossie and SarahT I just needed reassurance to make me get thru my earlier scary meltdown you really are both so lovely and I know you have your own awful symptoms to contend with so I really appreciate your posts big love to you both xxx
You are most welcome. 🤗
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I can feel like that too, one part of the day just feeling terrible with no hope and then towards the evening I can feel ok and then the next day the cycle starts again. I don’t get it.
Anyway, really hoping you ladies are doing ok today, if not remember it won’t stay this way. That’s what I tell myself all the time :-*
Ahh really so you get like this too? Have you spoken to your Gp about it? And do you find anti depressants or anti anxiety meds help you?Big hugs hunni x
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All I know is that because some of you ladies are feeling the same, it gives me a lot of strength to know I m not alone in this.
Tori you are right, it does not last, and it will pass, but like losingtheplot I sometimes, when it hits me bad, also need the reassurance. Someone to remind me of this. In my 'saner' moments I can see that clearly, but when it hits me... That's when I reach out too because nothing makes sense.
Just glad we can all help calm each other when we need it.
Xx
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Hi there
I haven’t spoken to my GP about this, I really don’t have much faith in my GP unfortunately so I try to work things out for myself. I’ve been on the same ADs for around a couple of years now and at first they helped but now they don’t seem to be having any affect, even with a higher dose.
I’m so sorry to read that you as well Sarah are struggling. I’m currently having a bad day, depression seems to have hit hard today and feeling ‘normal’ seems a distant memory even though yesterday was a better day, but it feels like it never happened.
Hugs to you both xx
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Hiya Tori,
Sadly we understand the good day followed by the bad day all too well. You advise us well, please know this will pass, despite how you feel right now.
Can you speak to a different gp at your surgery? A nurse, maybe? Someone there who is more understanding?
I have recently referred myself, online, on the NHS talking therapy service so I can talk all this through with someone. Is this something that may benefit you? I
I have used Ad's in the past, but right now I need to talk in depth with someone, as I do have good and ok days, so I am not anxious severely every day.I just need help on the worse days, and to help me from feeling so overwhelmed with a lot of things.
Tori, I return your hug tenfold. It will pass, and I am sorry you are having such an awful time. With you in spirit. Write whenever you need to if it helps.
Always someone here for you xx
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Hi there
I haven’t spoken to my GP about this, I really don’t have much faith in my GP unfortunately so I try to work things out for myself. I’ve been on the same ADs for around a couple of years now and at first they helped but now they don’t seem to be having any affect, even with a higher dose.
I’m so sorry to read that you as well Sarah are struggling. I’m currently having a bad day, depression seems to have hit hard today and feeling ‘normal’ seems a distant memory even though yesterday was a better day, but it feels like it never happened.
Hugs to you both xx
Sorry to hear you are having a tough time. Perhaps it is worth trying a different AD? Sometimes they do seem to lose their effectiveness. It is tough not having a good GP. I know it can be hard to change surgery but perhaps you could talk to a different GP at the practice.
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Hi Toriij
Sorry to hear your having a bad time too. My morning was awful. I feel for you hunni it will pass like you told me and you were so right. At the time it happens it is so very difficult to see this though. I would urge you to consider seeing a different Gp if poss like the other ladies have suggested to see what support is available for you. Ive only just started Ads past few days hope they help me like they have in past time will tell. Ive felt more stable this evening thsnkfully. Xxx
SarahT
I have signed up to some kind of therapy awaiting an assessment to see what therapy is best suited for my situation and symptoms.
Hope you and Flossie are both well big hugs xxxx
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Sarah thank you so much for your reply. I never seem to speak to the same GP, sometimes I can’t speak to one at all although having said that I could make more effort. I hadn’t thought of speaking to a nurse, a good idea. I have thought about therapy but have never been that keen on it, I think I just hate talking about me but I should be more open. Thank you for your hug, it’s means a lot and I return it back to you :-* I hope the therapy helps you. You sound very strong x
Thank you Flossie. I have been thinking about changing ADs, I’m just nervous in case they make me feel worse, having said that I’m not sure I could feel much worse today.
Thank you also Losingtheplot. I’m sorry you had an awful morning yesterday but great that you felt stable in the evening, it shows it’s in us somewhere - the stability.
It was Easter that I last felt this awful which is around 4 weeks ago, so it does seem to be cyclical. Trouble is it takes a while to pick myself back up again so don’t feel like I’m getting much of a break.
I’m on 2 pumps of oestrogel and was considering upping my dose a week prior to when I seem to crash, not sure if that’s a good idea or not.
Anyway sorry to go on, I seem to have hijacked the thread. How are all you ladies doing? x
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Sarah thank you so much for your reply. I never seem to speak to the same GP, sometimes I can’t speak to one at all although having said that I could make more effort. I hadn’t thought of speaking to a nurse, a good idea. I have thought about therapy but have never been that keen on it, I think I just hate talking about me but I should be more open. Thank you for your hug, it’s means a lot and I return it back to you :-* I hope the therapy helps you. You sound very strong x
Thank you Flossie. I have been thinking about changing ADs, I’m just nervous in case they make me feel worse, having said that I’m not sure I could feel much worse today.
Thank you also Losingtheplot. I’m sorry you had an awful morning yesterday but great that you felt stable in the evening, it shows it’s in us somewhere - the stability.
It was Easter that I last felt this awful which is around 4 weeks ago, so it does seem to be cyclical. Trouble is it takes a while to pick myself back up again so don’t feel like I’m getting much of a break.
I’m on 2 pumps of oestrogel and was considering upping my dose a week prior to when I seem to crash, not sure if that’s a good idea or not.
Anyway sorry to go on, I seem to have hijacked the thread. How are all you ladies doing? x
If you feel more comfortable to you could post a new thread where we can support you.
It is hard to have therapy especially when not being used to talking about yourself but it gets easier and sometimes the very thing you need to do is to talk about yourself.
You could try increasing the gel to another pump but I would do this every day to keep the levels stable. Sometimes increasing oestrogen can really help a low mood especially if it is hormonal.
I understand the fear of trying a new AD. Perhaps try the extra pump of oestrogen first and see if that helps at all.
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Hello Tori,
I am on patches so don't know anything about increasing the gel as and when basis. Like you, I know 100% know my worse dips are very much cyclical. On this basis, my g.p increased my patch from 75 to 100, throughout the month. This is to try to stabilise the natural cycle, and avoid the pms devastating mood swings.... Only been on the higher dose for 3 weeks, but so far I do feel improved physically, and slightly less intense mood swings.
This is the 'pms' week, so remains to be seen how this week goes. On coil, so I don't get bleeds. So far so good.
Is it worth talking to a gp.\ Nurse about your cyclical moods?? They may be able to advise about increasing your gel. My own g.p said pms \pmdd can be greatly affected during peri.
She also said I could take anti anxiety medication just in that week if my moods crash. May be worth considering?
Bless you for saying I sound strong. .... Last month I was sobbing at my husband begging for him to make it stop, make it all to away. So like you, it fluctuates madly, but I am seeing improvements, hope it lasts!
Hence the need for therapy. It's a need to try to stop feeling so overwhelmed at all this. I HATE any attention being on me too, but I so want to improve how I feel.
Perhaps go small.steps, get the hrt does to sort your needs, and just know there may be other options you can add in.
Please do post when you need to. Have you seen now many have read this thread? And why... Because the original post and the replies ring true with so many of us.
Hope today gets a better day for you. Keep in touch whenever you need to
Xx
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Thanks so much both of you for your help. Just to feel not so alone gives me a boost.
I suppose just having some hope is what I need and I know there is still a lot I need to try. I think I will up my dose to 3 pumps and see how it goes. Really keeping my fingers crossed for you Sarah that the stronger patch overrides the devastating dips you get. Sorry to hear you’ve had it so tough. All of this will definitely make us stronger.
Thank you both soooo much, you’ve no idea how much you help xx
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Thanks so much both of you for your help. Just to feel not so alone gives me a boost.
I suppose just having some hope is what I need and I know there is still a lot I need to try. I think I will up my dose to 3 pumps and see how it goes. Really keeping my fingers crossed for you Sarah that the stronger patch overrides the devastating dips you get. Sorry to hear you’ve had it so tough. All of this will definitely make us stronger.
Thank you both soooo much, you’ve no idea how much you help xx
You are most welcome. 🤗
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Thanks so much both of you for your help. Just to feel not so alone gives me a boost.
I suppose just having some hope is what I need and I know there is still a lot I need to try. I think I will up my dose to 3 pumps and see how it goes. Really keeping my fingers crossed for you Sarah that the stronger patch overrides the devastating dips you get. Sorry to hear you’ve had it so tough. All of this will definitely make us stronger.
Thank you both soooo much, you’ve no idea how much you help xx
Hi hunni please do not feel you have hi jacked the thread. This is for us all to post on its helped me to know that there are others out there feeling same as me. So honestly post as much as you want too :) The advice and tips given help us all xxx
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Thanks so much both of you for your help. Just to feel not so alone gives me a boost.
I suppose just having some hope is what I need and I know there is still a lot I need to try. I think I will up my dose to 3 pumps and see how it goes. Really keeping my fingers crossed for you Sarah that the stronger patch overrides the devastating dips you get. Sorry to hear you’ve had it so tough. All of this will definitely make us stronger.
Thank you both soooo much, you’ve no idea how much you help xx
Hi hunni please do not feel you have hi jacked the thread. This is for us all to post on its helped me to know that there are others out there feeling same as me. So honestly post as much as you want too :) The advice and tips given help us all xxx
Aw thanks and I’m glad this has helped you too. Just to not feel so alone helps so much doesn’t it xxx