Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => All things menopause => Topic started by: Unicorn on March 05, 2022, 10:55:45 AM
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Hi there
Im asking if any of you lovely ladies can give me some advice? I've lost all hope 😢.
It's such a long story and I'm sorry to babble on...I'm at the end of my rope.
I'm 48 and for about 4 years I've been suffering with dry mouth, hot sweats at night, horrible pounding heart and some missed beats which coincide with my face heating up, exhausion, shaking, intermittent low mood, lack of motivation etc. I still have my periods quite regular, bar a bit of spotting in between and they seem to be a little different. I've been to 3 GP's who haven't been much help (especially the women, which is odd 😏) and I was given sequential Evorel patches (2 weeks oestrogen and 2 week combined) and tried them for 12 weeks and they kept coming off, bled nearly constantly and I didn't feel any better really.
I take Sertraline 100mg which I have done 18 months now and have suffered intermittent anxiety more than depression throughout my life, but before this, I had been tootling along very nicely for 10 years plus.
The thing is at the moment I have constant pounding heart, which makes my face hot, and it just won't ease.... I've had it everyday now for about 2 months and it's got to the point where I am virtually incapacitated everyday.... it races at rest and it races when I'm busy. I just haven't got the motivation to do anything as it's horrific. It has got to the point where I have difficulty leaving the house or doing anything 😪 and it also makes me feel sick and I have no appetite. I now feel so anxious because of it. I'm not living 😪. I have a GP phone appointment again on Monday with a different GP, but I know she will say it's 'stress' or 'anxiety because I have had anxiety before, but this feels different.
The GP was going to try another form of hrt but there isn't any others available in my area.
I really don't know what to do.... I thought the Sertraline would help this, but I think it's a physical thing more than a mental one. I have had heart checks and a 24 hour Holter monitor but nothing was abnormal. I'm also on fish oil, tried magnesium, and take a women's vitamin.
Please help me, I don't want to sound dramatic, but I can't live like this for another 10 years +, I feel horrible every day now 😔
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Hello unicorn. How horrible for you to be going through all this. You have symptoms I have too so it does sound menopausal. If there are not any more HRT options in your area then I would ask to be seen at a menopause clinic. It can be done over the phone. You should not have to put up with this. How frustrating your GPs are so unsupportive. I have found the same and a menopause DR will be so much more understanding.
It is great you are on Sertaline but if the anxiety is caused my hormones then HRT is going to help along side it.
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Hi I can sympathise as at the same age as you I was suffering exactly the same.
I’m sure there must be another HRT available for you to try. I’m on Oestrogel, but I know that’s hard to get at the moment . You could try an oestrogen patch with Utrogestan x
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Thank you Flossieteacake..... Great name!
Do I ask the GP for a referral? I'm even nervous about asking. I'm also really nervous that nothing will work and I will be like this for the rest of my life xxx
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Thank you Dotty! I don't know if our GPs have that in my rural area but I can ask? Xx😁
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Thank you Flossieteacake..... Great name!
Do I ask the GP for a referral? I'm even nervous about asking. I'm also really nervous that nothing will work and I will be like this for the rest of my life xxx
Thank you. I like your name too. :) Yes, you can ask for a referral. I understand feeling nervous but you are entitled to see somebody who will be able to understand what you are going through. I hope your surgery has the option to do it online as it may be less stressful for you.
Oh no, you will not always be like this. I suspect that is the anxiety telling you that. If you browse around here you will find so many who feel like you and many who have found a HRT that helped.
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Thank you. I know this is really bad but in desperation, I've even bought some Livial via an on line chemist. I know it's for post menopausal women but I have read bits that it can be used for perimenopause too? Xxx
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I had not heard of that and just looked it up. I do not know anything about it. Did you not have to have an online consultation to buy it?
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It seems that it is not used in women who have periods as it can cause irregular bleeding. I guess that is why they say it is for postmenopause. I wonder if it would help for you to put the name in the search bar on here to see if anybody else has tried it.
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Flossieteacake, thank you so much, I think I would rather take the irregular bleeding option than all the other stuff...lol! 😃 i will have a look xxx thank you and Ditties for your help
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Hi
I could have written your post (although I am nearly 46).
I am so sorry you are suffering. It’s dreadful isn’t it. Please don’t put up with this. Tell the GP how much this is impacting your life and ask what they plan to do about it. I would start by asking to try a higher dose of HRT (you won’t be be able to have a combined patch any more though it would be patch or gel and progesterone tablets separately). If the GP is not keen then that is perhaps the time to ask to be referred to a menopause clinic.
Couple of questions : what are your periods like and what have they been doing in the past few years? Do you get any relief at any times of the month or are your symptoms just constant ? And - did you find the antidepressant helped when you started taking it 18 months ago? Have you had any benefit from the HRT at all yet?
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Hi Vanillalover! My periods are pretty regular, but are few days out (23 to 29 days) and have become a bit lighter... I have also started spotting sometimes in between. I so wish they would stop tbh, as at least I would know it's definitely perimenopause.... I sometimes doubt myself sometimes and I just think it's all in my mind. I tried the patches about a year ago, but my mood went low (may have been the Covid jab I had?) But I'm sure i felt better with the combined patch rather than the oestrogen patch.... the patches were a nightmare though, and kept falling off (I'm a nurse so get very warm on the Ward) and they started to leave a rash.... a bit of a nightmare. The one GP also said 'because I didn't feel any relief, I am not perimenopausal' which made me think im going mad xxxx
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Hi Vanillalover! My periods are pretty regular, but are few days out (23 to 29 days) and have become a bit lighter... I have also started spotting sometimes in between. I so wish they would stop tbh, as at least I would know it's definitely perimenopause.... I sometimes doubt myself sometimes and I just think it's all in my mind. I tried the patches about a year ago, but my mood went low (may have been the Covid jab I had?) But I'm sure i felt better with the combined patch rather than the oestrogen patch.... the patches were a nightmare though, and kept falling off (I'm a nurse so get very warm on the Ward) and they started to leave a rash.... a bit of a nightmare. The one GP also said 'because I didn't feel any relief, I am not perimenopausal' which made me think im going mad xxxx
I do not agree with that GP at all. Maybe it was the wrong HRT? Maybe the oestrogen was not high enough? Maybe it was due to the patches coming off? There are lots of reasons and to say it cannot be perimenopause based on that sounds quite ignorant to me. Perimenopause is before menopause so people still have periods. It is when there has not been a period for a year that it is thought to be menopause.
You are not going mad. Your hormones are all over the place and then this happens we feel unwell.
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I think you need to try HRT again. Sounds like you are perimenopausal to me. If the patches weren’t sticking then I guess you’d have no chance at absorbing the hormones properly. I run, do TKD, shower etc in mine and haven’t had one fall off yet. So something was wrong there.
I would ask for a different type if possible. Give it 3 months and see what happens. I think that’s a reasonable starting point. If GP is dismissive certainly ask for a referral.
I am in a similar position in that I have existing mental health condition which has gradually been getting worse over the last couple of years and I’m sure it’s due to hormones. Been struggling with migraines (all hormonal), hot flushes, aches, anxiety etc….started HRT five months ago. Saw a big difference to sleep quality etc and some things like palpitations have disappeared altogether. HOWEVER I’m still not right and need to act. This month has been dreadful in particular mentally. Last month I had a lift at beginning of cycle when oestrogen rises. I think my ovaries can’t be bothered this month! I have terrible anxiety, especially in the morning and am just getting quite overwhelmed at the moment.
I am waiting for menopause clinic appt (nhs) - I can ring them in a week if they haven’t got back to me by then. GP unsure about increasing patch strength to try due to the migraines so referred me.
I am open to the idea that even higher patch may not work (if I’m allowed) and I may need to look at gel, spray etc for more trials before I say it’s not going to be any help to me.
I am also considering that I may need to change antidepressant (been on Prozac 15 years). I didn’t realise that there is something called Prozac poop-out (!) which is a phenomenon limited to SSRIs where you get a tolerance to them after a lot of use and it is no longer anywhere near as effective as it once was.
I’m thinking a change to an SNRI like Venlafaxine might help and also has known action on hot flushes and migraines. However if possible (and I don’t have to wait too long for the clinic) I’m going to hold out for trying an increase in HRT first before switching as it’s more easily reversible. SNRIs can be difficult to get off again, I don’t mind taking an antidepressant for life but I need to make sure there are no easier options before I switch.
Sorry to make it all about me there! Just wanted to illustrate really that there are a range of options available HRT wise and mental health medication wise. Keep going until you get an improvement ! You will not be like this forever. I am praying for my periods to stop too just so I have some progress towards the end of this rollercoaster!
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Hi Unicorn, I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through and although my experience of HRT is limited I am well acquainted with anxiety and just wanted to let you know that I have felt like that before - that nothing may ever help. But, if you keep trying different things and keep looking for the right person / clinic / GP / therapist you will find your solution. Don't give up, your answer is there you just have to find it and you will. I would highly recommend Utrogestan as it has greatly improved my sleep quality which in turn makes me feel much better during the day. I also have Oestrogel which is good because you can adjust your dosage when needed, e.g. have an extra pump of it if you need it (so long as you don't exceed the maximum dosage.) I too take magnesium - It might be worth trying different types or adjust the dosage. Although it does help you really need to find a doctor or therapist who makes you feel cared for and works with you until you feel better again. I hope that is of some help. I went through countless doctors, counsellors, treatments before I found an excellent therapist and GP. The quality varies a lot but it really is worth keeping going until you find them. I wish you the best of luck xxx
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Thank you Vanillalover and Katherine! It's such a weird feeling as I don't feel anxious when it's starts.... it feels more physical, if that makes sense? Horrible day today again, with constant pounding heart and hot face.... it doesn't let up. I do sleep thank goodness, my sleep is still good which is a bonus 👍👍 xxx
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Hi Unicorn, It's good to hear that you are sleeping well! Don't give up looking for a solution and you will get it sorted. I don't want to state what might sound obvious but I'll say it in case it helps in the meantime. If I feel anxious and desperately need to calm down I sit in a quiet place where I won't be disturbed and meditate by listening to my breathing. My mind keeps trying to think but each time I just go back to my breathing. If you can do this for even 10 minutes it really does have an amazing effect. To me it feels like stepping out of life for a bit then coming back a bit refreshed and sometimes I even figure out answers to things after that I had been thinking about before and couldn't. Wishing you the best xxx
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Thank you Katherine, the thing is, it feels worse when I sit down and do nothing as the heart thumps are much worse and the hot face 🥵 there there when I'm relaxed and there when I'm not xxx
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Have you tried filling water spray bottle with water from the fridge and misting your face and neck? Sorry I'm not much help. I too have hot flushes but it tends to be sorted by just wearing cool clothing or a thin duvet instead of a thick one. I would try fans, a cold damp sweat band round my forehead and mist bottles as a temporary measure until you get it sorted. I really feel for you about the thumping heart. I get it if I drink alcohol, when it is wearing off my heart races and nothing will slow it down. Have you got another GP appointment soon? x
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Thank you so much Katherine ❤ you have been a huge help, honestly! I will try that tip. I have a telephone consultation on Monday afternoon, with a different GP... she has been very good with my daughter, so I really hopes she knows something on perimenopause xxx
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Oh good, that's not long to wait now, and the fact that she has been good with your daughter sounds very encouraging too. She might be really good on perimenopause and if she is unsure you could ask her if she knows anyone who knows more or you could ask her to find out. You could even try a different GP surgery if necessary. When I move to a new area I tend to try different GPs until I find a really good one and stick with them! Let us know how you get on xxx
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Thanks Katherine, I will do! I only used to have these symptoms for about 2 weeks but now they have ramped up... hoping my periods will stop soon and I will feel slightly more human again 😁 i don't know whether this is a perimenopausal thing too, but i have internal vibrations in my body xx
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Thank you Vanillalover and Katherine! It's such a weird feeling as I don't feel anxious when it's starts.... it feels more physical, if that makes sense? Horrible day today again, with constant pounding heart and hot face.... it doesn't let up. I do sleep thank goodness, my sleep is still good which is a bonus 👍👍 xxx
Hi
Apparently this is a symptom of menopause - I’ve got exactly the same thing. Feel physically anxious but I’m not actually anxious. It’s weird!
I’ve been given propranolol but not sure it helps x
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I think you might have a build up of stress that needs to get out, you won’t be able to breathe and meditate when you feel like that.
Exercise could use up too much energy, so thought is you could try shaking it out.
Simple technique of laying down and letting the body take over. Out of your mind and into your body. Don’t think about it! Feel it and if shaking happens that’s good!
Just like a wild animal in danger once the initial threat had passed they shake to get the negative energy out of their system.
Then they graze and you might then be able to meditate and bring calmness.
It takes practice x
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Thank you Nik and Marchlove. I hope you feel better soon Nik and thank you Marchlove for your advice xxxx
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I have the same thing exactly …my mood is often ok but inside I can feel the anxiety …. For me it tends to manifest in stomach so butterflies, not wanting to eat etc. Also shaking, sweating etc. not much seems to help. Usually worse in morning and wears off by evening.
I am just finishing four months of CBT, basically there’s not much you can do to stop the anxiety (which is obviously physical in case of peri and menopause) but it’s a matter of looking at it, seeing there’s no real cause and then just trying to move on with your day despite it. CBT has been useful for strategies to stop that physical anxiety spiralling into negative thoughts, stop it changing your behaviour (like avoiding things or situations for example).
But yes it’s so miserable!