Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: Kathleen on July 19, 2021, 05:55:43 PM
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Hello ladies.
Like many of us I am having trouble sleeping in this hot weather and struggling to deal with the tiredness that comes with it.
Do any of you ladies have any tips or tricks that help you to unwind?
I seem to remember that some people take CBD oil and others use relaxation Apps. I expect some ladies like a glass or two of wine but others can't tolerate alcohol these days.
I can't be the only person who feels like an over tired toddler who needs to sleep but is too uptight to do so and is extremely irritable as a result. The term 'tired and wired' springs to mind lol.
Incidentally I read that the brain can confuse fatigue with anxiety and this is can occur in post operative patients. Perhaps some of our meno anxiety is actually fatigue?
Any words of wisdom could be welcome ladies.
Take care all.
K.
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Hi Kathleen! I've managed to sleep thanks to melatonin for the last couple of nights
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Hello Kathleen. If this is helpful for you, I have been having a few breaks from the desk to run cold water on my wrists, and putting a damp, cool cotton scarf at my neck. Tonight I will have a cool shower before bed which will not keep me awake. I have one sheet over me, and make sure that the curtains are kept closed all day in the bedroom to stop it heating up.
It stays about a comfortable enough temperature through the night.
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Hi Kathleen, can't advise on relaxing as it's something seemingly alien to my system ::) but I do have some tricks for getting myself off to sleep.
One is to count backwards from 500 - a nice mindless but mind occupying thing to do that stops any errant thoughts and poses a simple distraction - usually works, but not always.
Another is from meditation - focusing on different parts of my body in a systematic way (similar to above in that it's distracting) but not trying to relax them. I find though that this one can get uncomfortable sometimes if parts of my body are protesting about pain or tiredness or not generally feeling ok.
In the same vein I'll lie as still as I can, not moving anything and keeping the breathing really shallow - again forces the mind to focus, but is actually quite relaxing.
Other non-mind related tricks - I make the room as dark as possible - light always wakes me up, and if I'm sleeping badly even light noises wake me up, so I put in earplugs - they allow me to sleep literally like a log.
Failing all else, I take sleeping pills for as long as I think I need to - I'm lucky in that I don't need to increase the dose to get the same effect night after night, and don't usually have problems coming off them. Having said that, with vertigo for the last four years I haven't risked taking sleeping pills so have had to rely on the above tricks instead.
I really hope you can find some way of relaxing and getting enough sleep - it's bad enough having problems that keep you awake, without adding to them with lack of sleep. Hugs to you xxxx
LL
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Hi Kathleen I’ve learnt to give myself permission to rest / relax and do what my body needs. It’s been hard as I used to be one of these people constantly on the go. x
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Dotty, you took the words clean out of my mouth. I agree! Whilst there are many methods, "tricks" and practices, I am learning that wondering what I can DO rather than how I can BE is counter-productive. So, giving permission.....100%! Learning to give oneself what one needs feels like the finest lesson ever. Strive for nothing, receive everything! Good luck!
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Postmeno3 🥰yes it’s not been easy but I’m trying hard to not feel guilty when I do things for “me” x
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My sleep isn't great either, but this is what I do to calm my mind to encourage sleep. A couple of drops of lavender essential oil on the pillow and breathing exercises from yoga class - you lie splat on your back in shavasana 'corpse' pose, relax each part of your body bit by bit, put a hand on your belly so you can feel your breath and focus only on your breathing until it pushes all other thoughts out of your head and/or you fall asleep. I always think that even if I'm having a bad night and don't sleep much, at least I'll have given my brain and body a rest with a little meditation.
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Hello again ladies.
Thanks to you all for your comments.
I had another sleepless night last night and as a result my anxiety and tearfulness have ramped up today.
When this happens I usually sleep well the following night so I have my fingers crossed for tonight.
Wishing you well ladies.
K.
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This heat is impossible Kathleen. It will pass. :hug:
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Hello Wrensong.
Thank you so much for your response. As you say, this will pass, wise words!
Take care and wishing you well.
K.
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Hello!
I find cold water works so well for me ! Sea or long cold shower !
Hard at first but then blissful !
Have just got my 76 year old mum into sea swimming and she can’t stop thinking about it ! Xx
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I'm lucky not to usually struggle to get off to sleep, except in this heat or after a very stressful day, but what I can't do since peri began way, way back, is stay asleep anywhere near long enough. But that's another story! Anyway, I did struggle to get to sleep throughout the peri years when I was chronically stressed & worrying terribly about lack of sleep - Catch 22 - so my partner started reading aloud to me in bed & that really helped me drop off. I also used to have my MP3 player in bed with me & listen through really good headphones to guided meditations or progressive relaxation exercises when I woke in the small hours. The meditations are 20-30 min stories in which the listener imagines they are involved & have very good, natural sound effects (waves, birdsong, whalesong etc), so pleasant to get immersed in. Better than reading, as no need to switch on the light which my partner would not have appreciated!
ElsaShiningStar I agree about cold water but what I tend to do is gradually reduce the shower temperature so that by the end it's running completely cold. There's less shock to the system that way! Standing under that for a couple of minutes cools me right down & afterwards my heart rate has slowed & I feel chilled in more ways than one. :welcomemm:
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My hubby says I’ve never understood the concept of relaxing as I can never get my brain to switch off … apparently he can literally think of nothing for quite a long time! 🤣
When I need to relax to get to sleep, I keep a fan running in the bedroom all night regardless of the room temperature as I find the gentle humming sound really soothing and with the current heat outside the cool breeze is very nice too. Then I lay in bed and tense and relax each muscle in turn as much as I can starting from my toes and working upwards. I’ve no idea why that works but it seems to for me.
I’ve also tried doing the muscle tensing thing during the day when I get stressed and it seems to help but that could just be because it gives me something else to focus on rather than the thing that’s stressing me.
I’ve always been a light sleeper too and unfortunately chose to live with a man who snores like a train so when I need to get a few hours of undisturbed sleep I sleep in the spare room and that helps too!
I hope you find something that works for you.
Best wishes,
Mag x
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Hello again ladies.
Yet more good advice so thank you.
I am also a person who finds it difficult to relax so the added stresses of the menopause were never going to help lol.
Incidentally my trusty meno book talks about the tranquilising effects of oestrogen and the PMT effects of progesterone however some ladies report that prog has a calming effect. Does anyone know any more about this? I think the progesterone cream is called Serenity which speaks volumes but then again many people talk about feeling on edge etc on the prog phase of their HRT. Surely both responses can't be true?
Back in the day, I recall having tender breasts before a period and although I didn't really think about irritability I always felt calmer as soon as my period started so I assume there had been some build up of tension. Does this point to a sensitivity to oestrogen or progesterone ? I wonder if the experiences of ladies during their menstruating years can help work out how they respond to both oestrogen and progesterone? A line of enquiry for us all perhaps?
Wishing you well ladies.
K.
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^^ Interesting thought, Kathleen.
I'm like an overtired toddler most of the time, lol, and it is because I struggle to hit the pause button, go slower, say no to things that mean I end up getting overwhelmed. Anyway ...
I've found CBD oil really helpful. In my 'youff' I liked the occasional toke, so it's not huge surprisingly to me that I do quite well on CBD oil. I use the Jacob Hooy 5% with vitamin D3 from Holland and Barrett. It comes with a little dropper thing, and I have a squirt about 30 minutes before bed time. It doesn't taste that great. If I'm feeling quite toddlery, I'll also have some valerian tea, usually with damiana and lime flower, the valerian is the relaxy bit, the damiana is meant to encourage good dreams and the lime flower is because both of the previous taste a bit disgusting.
^^ Obviously, a bit of a hippy.
For me, diet plays quite a big role, if I'm stuffing myself with loads of plant based home cooked foods, and very little bread, no junk or chocolate, I feel a million times better, lots more relaxed, and I'm sleeping better. Occasionally, if life's kind of frantic, I'll supplement this with Floradix multi vitamin and minerals so that I'm supporting my general immune system and stuff.
I don't quite get it myself, but my mood is a lot flatter if I get enough sleep and enough food. I monitor my sleep and resting heart rate with a FitBit. As soon as I see my resting heart rate going up, which is always as my sleep hours are going down, I swing into 'must recover and take care of myself' action. Obviously, this is easier said than done, because people around me are often demanding!
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I sometimes listen to the music on mindfulness apps on my I.pad.
Listening to the gentle music and birds singing, or water flowing, really helps.
I’ve even drifted off to sleep whilst listening.
If you lose yourself in the music, it’s soooo relaxing.
Good luck Kathleen. Xx