Menopause Matters Forum

Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: Tc on February 03, 2019, 06:32:56 PM

Title: Thank you ladies
Post by: Tc on February 03, 2019, 06:32:56 PM
This is a thank you
I was on such a downer this morning and my posts reflected that as they often have.
.
This afternoon i I actually went to visit family , yes I went out!! and someone said "you don't look well" and I replied " it's the new medication I'm on"  and another family member  said "oh we're not gonna hear about your flaming menopause are we?". I'm normally a pretty feisty girl but that has deserted me lately so I just shut up and had to bite back tears. No one else said a word and the subject was changed.

I wouldn't mind but I hardly ever talk about it to family and friends

Only  you ladies on here know the truth about what I've realy been going through because I feel able to say it.

So after that I would've come home feeling so alone and even more down if it wasn't for the replies I received here. I have been listened to and offered advice and support  that I wouldn't have had otherwise.

Without that I would be feeling very different this evening.

 :thankyou:
.
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: CLKD on February 03, 2019, 07:07:17 PM
I would be ringing that person and asking them to explain what they meant, trouble is not having an immediate retort! but if you ring out of the blue, they will be caught on the back foot ;-)

 :bighug:
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: jaypo on February 03, 2019, 07:09:06 PM
Ha! Flaming menopause?flaming family 😆 maybe we're not quite the same as a face to face but we're all here for you anytime you need to vent any worries or just to get something off your chest.
Good for you going to visit,it's true what they say.........you can choose your friends but not your family,I DEFINITELY wouldn't choose mine 😂🤣
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Tc on February 03, 2019, 07:30:29 PM
She didnt say flaming she used another f word . Funny how in order not to swear I could've changed it to flipping or something else but I chose "flaming". Meno brain at work here  🔥🔥🔥
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: jaypo on February 03, 2019, 07:41:53 PM
Has this family member hit menopause age yet?😏
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: AgathaC on February 03, 2019, 08:14:27 PM
Write her a note thanking her for her concern and tell her you'll be sure to ask her for menopause advice.
Then call her at weird times to talk about vagina dryness, etc.
Jaypo is right that you can't choose your family!!
It's crap presents for her from now on xxx
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Tc on February 03, 2019, 08:44:43 PM
Shes a year younger than Me!!
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Roseneath on February 03, 2019, 08:45:49 PM
Tc   How rubbish for you. I find it hard not to be hurt with thick skinned comments like that.  Or I think what I should have said an hour later!  I am finding the big 'M' seems seems to make many people either laugh or change the subject. Like talking about body hair. It's like ' Oh no - this doesn't happen to me'.   

Remember some people are like clouds. Once they are gone it's a beautiful day.  And I am sure you are a beautiful person too.








Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Dancing Queen on February 03, 2019, 10:16:05 PM
Been at the pub tonight talking about the big m to a couple of acquaintances..dont know them that well but good to have an open chat . The husbands looked hunted and shuffled to the other end of the table!
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Emerald2017 on February 03, 2019, 10:36:11 PM
When I told to a friend about my early meno 2 years ago, she said that I am overreacting and that meno is a natural process, not a disease. She said that she was tired with me cause I was complaining all the time.
I did not say a word and after 2 years she started to have meno symptoms. My answer? I told her to accept the nature and talk to her doc.
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Tc on February 03, 2019, 11:16:30 PM
Oh ladies  love hearing your stories.
😁
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Ladybt28 on February 04, 2019, 12:00:11 AM
 ;D ;D oh AgathaC   ;D ;D you made me laugh out loud!!

Chin up Tc! - she'll get what's comin! but no doubt you will be the bigger person and say the right thing cos your a nice
person.....
or you could start practicing come sarcastic comments in a mirror - just so as your ready!!  :whist: :)
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: CLKD on February 04, 2019, 12:06:04 AM
Emerald - she's still your *friend*  :o.  ??  Years ago Mum told me, "You don't want to be depressed" - nope, but I was; and "Don't lead your husband a dance as your father led me".  So I never told her about any health issues.  Ever.  Not even these days unless it's obviously, like a cold.

I think women still believe it's the last period and a 'few hot flushes' without having any idea what flushing entails  :bang:   How short is your C.mas card list now TC? ;-)

Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: jaypo on February 04, 2019, 04:16:52 PM
Or even worse,you could invite us lot round to meet her mmmwwwwhahahahaha 😎
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Emerald2017 on February 04, 2019, 10:41:34 PM
Hi CLKD!  ;)
Yeah she is still my friend but I don't share with her a lot...She said that my problem was psychological and not because of meno and such things! I had too severe symptoms and was feeling like a failure at 41 because of my early menopause.
And of course she was absolutely against hrt. I prefer not to continue the debate with her and when she started to have meno symptoms I just told her to ask her doc.
When she asked me about hormones I simply said her that I don't want to talk about!
I feel absolutely fine on hrt and am at a better place than 2 years ago and of course very very thankful for the forum!!! Thanks you ladies!!!💐😘
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Golden retriever on February 05, 2019, 10:05:15 PM
Hi ladies
Aren't people unreal at times when you think they will be supportive.?
I too am going through early menopause since 38, I am now 42 and even can't talk about it to my older sisters as they have not experienced it yet.
The majority of my friends just say ‘get on with it...,

I'm so looking forward to the day when they come to me.... cos my response ‘sorry I have forgotten what is was like ‘ hahah. Sorry having a really crap day ladies, feeling very low.
Crying and very moody.
Will these feelings of up and down ever stabilize?
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: jaypo on February 05, 2019, 10:08:36 PM
I know,you'd think being women we would all support each other,unfortunately the young (not all) are very self absorbed these days and only think of themselves,what a world (uk at least) it's going to be☹️
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Golden retriever on February 05, 2019, 10:14:45 PM
Couldn't agree with you more  jay po. A friend of mine who is nearly two years older than me never even asks how I am, then she said one day ‘ I can't wait to get my next Botox injection, you should try it sometime.  ‘I laughed....
It was lucky for her that I was on a good day 😄😄
If it were today, my answer would have been very different!!

Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: jaypo on February 05, 2019, 10:29:54 PM
🤣 yay let's all get Botox, I especially want the big fat upper lip look
Seriously though, I hope your mood swings calm down,I'm sure they will,I went through a phase of severe health anxiety,hadn't a clue what was wrong with me but it left as quickly as it arrived,it's all hormones,aren't we ladies so lucky 🤨
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Golden retriever on February 05, 2019, 10:34:48 PM
Thank you jay po for your kind words
I know it will but..... I have no patience... 😜

The image of lip fillers made me laugh 😆. Fish lips I like to call them.

Thank you 🙏

Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Ladybt28 on February 05, 2019, 11:13:09 PM
Do you know what I think unsupportive women who wont talk about the menopause or make stupid comments are really scared  S**tl**s cos they know it will be coming to them and they can't handle the idea!  That's why they get Botox Golden Retriever!
 ;D ;D.  There is of course another way for your friend to get a "fat lip" but you are much too nicer person I'm sure.

If anyone who had made snide comments to me about meno came asking for info I wouldn't hesitate to repeat back some of the comments they made to me back to them.  On that front I would put my "inner loveliness" firmly on hold  ;) :P
Sorry to hear you have had a rough day Golden Retriever - maybe something here has made you smile.  I can usually find some comment on here that makes me laugh out loud most days.  ;D
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: Golden retriever on February 07, 2019, 11:18:14 PM
Thank you ladybt28, yep it's hilarious isn't it.
Yep laughed so much with your comments , thank you xxx
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: jaypo on February 08, 2019, 10:59:00 AM
Aaaahaha ladybt,that would be a much cheaper way to get the fat lip look,what a good idea,maybe we could start up a business?
It would work both ways,we smack these,I don't want to talk about menopause women in the kisser,instant Botox and we get rid of our pent up frustration,sorted 💋👍
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: jillydoll on February 08, 2019, 04:06:18 PM
Can I start off pleeeeeaaasssssse.....👊🏻
I know someone who always said ‘there's always something wrong with her' in a horrible way.
I can't say who she is , because I live with her! 😂
You've probably guessed, I don't  like her much......I'll start with her......😠🤭🤭
Title: Re: Thank you ladies
Post by: jaypo on February 08, 2019, 04:12:18 PM
Well ladybt and I will come round and she can get 3 for the price of 1,obviously i'll do the Glasgow kiss version 😤💪🏼