Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => All things menopause => Topic started by: Molly123 on October 23, 2018, 06:41:51 PM
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Hi, I feel so alone with this, am in the menopause and because I have suffered a mini stroke a few years ago (before the menopause started) the docs won't even entertain giving me HRT, I am 60 and feeling so low have nearly all the 37 symptoms of the menopause, please can someone help!!! :'(
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Oh you poor girl,this site is great,people all in the same boat.Not sure what to suggest apart from the usual. I can't have hrt either because of history of breast cancer in my immediate family.Anxiety & stress through the roof,just not me. I'm taking the Bach remedy drops,seem to help a little. I'm alone really,have a wonderful husband & daughter but moved from north east of Scotland to south west of England & have no friends down here to talk to but the women on here are very supportive.Keep on at your dr,a lot of them really don't understand & tell you it's “normal†that's just not good enough.
I'm going back to see mine & I'm not leaving til I get some help.Hope you get some too xx
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Thank you for replying, am sorry to hear your story, this is the first time I have done anything like this but feel alone as I am divorced and on my own, am considering telling my GP that I want HRT as nothing can be as bad as what I'm going through x
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Hi Molly123 you won't feel so alone now that you've found us!
What are your worst symptoms as we may be able to give advice as to HRT alternatives.
Taz x :welcomemm:
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Hi Molly123 @ :welcomemm:
No need to feel alone any longer. We are a friendly lot on here.
It's a horrid time with all the horrible symptoms you have to go through but I promise you will have some good days, &r not so bad days & it will eventually get better.
Do you have any friends that you can talk to about it, or family?, if not then just pop in to here for a natter. There are usually chatty threads going on in the This & That section.
Welcome Aboard Molly & have a :hug:
Cazi x
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Thanks cazi and Taz for replying, so glad to know I'm not alone as have really cut myself off from friends, my worse symptoms are extreme tiredness terrible feelings of doom(which come and go ) am a nightmare to live with for my son who is walking on eggshells shells all the time, the pain in my stomach is terrible, have lost so much weight because I can't eat much, god I'm a mess.
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No wonder you feel so low. Have you had the stomach pain investigated and which part of your stomach is the pain in?
Taz :hug:
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Also I think that patches can deliver HRT successfully? Make a note of which symptom you would like to ease first, read the treatment section above and make notes.
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Taz
Yes have had colonoscopy and apart from a hernia they haven't found anything (have had 5 of them) think they just like shoving thinks down my throat ha ha
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Poor molly, I had a colonoscopy which showed up diverticulitis,quite common in us oldies I believe :-\ had ibs most of my adult life but recently getting worse symptoms,away for a ct to see if I've got it in rest of gut or I've an ibd,hope not but it all makes you panic, I also have the impending doom,constant butterflies aaaarghhhhh when will it all stop?
You're definitely not alone
Lots of love
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Oh & a colonoscopy goes er em up the way not down ;D
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Hiatus hernia is common in ladies of a certain age due to laxity of muscles which allows reflux >:(.
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Hello Molly 123 and welcome to the forum.
I am a little older than you and I sympathise completely. It is worth asking your GP for alternatives that may help you or ask to be referred to a menopause expert for specialist help.
This can be a very distressing time in our lives but you are among friends here and I hope you find some comfort in that.
Take care and keep posting.
K.
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Hi Molly glad you have joined. You will get all the advice you need on here as they are a real friendly informative bunch. Myself and Jaypo have been discussing our symptoms and the losing too much weight bit. If you have anxiety the weight can drop off so easily due to all of the adrenaline running through our bodies. When the stomach has pain or the jitters too it's very hard to eat. Please go back to your GP and tell them exactly how you feel as none of us should be suffering really. Sending big hugs :)
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Hi Molly that's my granddaughters name lol.welcome and I just want to say you've come to the best place for help and advice.when you feel a but more settled have a read through all the posts, just type a word in the search facility that's related to anything you'd like to learn about.anxiety breasts dryness anything at all and all the previous posts on it will come up so you can have a read and pick up some good advice from people who've been there and will try to help you with their experiences.keep posting and asking questions there's always someone around xx
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Thanks cazi and Taz for replying, so glad to know I'm not alone as have really cut myself off from friends, my worse symptoms are extreme tiredness terrible feelings of doom(which come and go ) am a nightmare to live with for my son who is walking on eggshells shells all the time, the pain in my stomach is terrible, have lost so much weight because I can't eat much, god I'm a mess.
When my anxiety gets bad, my stomach follows. I really don't want to eat anything in this state. I've lost so much weight my body feels so depleted, like there's barely anything left to function. I'm starting to think that's strongly contributing to the worsening anxiety and symptoms. Try to eat as often as you can, even if it just a small handful of something.
Are certain foods possibly triggering the stomach pains? I seem to have developed a gluten sensitivity since this all began and had to cut that out. I have less stomach pains but sadly less food choices I enjoy. I'm struggling with the transition. Maybe try keeping a food/symptom diary. I also take digestive enzymes when my stomach gets bad.
If you can, try getting blood levels checked for deficiency. Or take a good multivitamin. You could be lacking in something that's contributing to how you are feeling, especially if you aren't eating.
I hope you can get feeling better soon. I understand the awful place you are at right now as I'm trying to pull myself out of a similar place.
If you can't have HRT, there's things like antidepressants and such they can give you to try to ease some of the symptoms you are dealing with. I'm thinking of going this route as well.
Try some guided meditation for the anxiety. It really does help.
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To everyone of you that has sent messages I would like to say a very heart felt THANK YOU , I will definitely be coming on to this forum again, Jaypo ;D ; ;D I literally don't know which way up I am ha ha meant gasocscopy xxx
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Hi Molly123
The menopause can ready mess with our heads and it also messes with so many areas of our body.
Whilst HRT can help with many things it is not a cure all and for some it can be difficult to tolerate.
You seem to be overwhelmed by all your symptoms but your stomach pain is probably the thing that effects you most because if you can't eat or sleep well because if this then everything else will be worse.
The NHS and doctors in general will only do tests, offer a diagnosis and then treatment when needed but what they are useless at is giving advice about how to manage ongoing problems.
Digestive problems are so common when menopause hits. Muscles become lax and the digestive system is controlled by muscle, also the digestive enzymes seem to reduce as well - so this is a combination that will give problems.
Where on your torso do you get the pain? Is this in you diaphragm area or lower down?
Have tried a strict diet and eating regime?
By eating small meals regularly that are highly nutritious and easy to digest you may find:
You get less indigestion and pain.
Less wind and bloating
Improvement in mood as you don't get drops on blood sugar levels
You sleep better because the body sin balance
If you could get some good gentle exercise thiswould help everything. Just 10 minute brisk walks 3 times a day can work wonders.
I am also concerned that you say you have cut yourself off from friends - I suspect this is because of the fatigue but also low self esteem which is also common with the menopause - with small changes your life can improve and maybe then you'll feel more inclined to socialise and reconnect with friends.
If you can start with small changes and strategies to improve things it's amazing what can be achieved.
You have a whole new set of friends here on the forum, so use us to get yourself back in track.
DG x
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Oh molly you made me smile.Had a bad night last night,like you,pains in tummy & then a major panic attack,didn't even know you could get one when you're all tucked up in bed.
Can I ask have you lost weight?As I've now lost half a stone & I'm not even trying :'(
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Jaypo
Have lost at least 3 kilos without trying either as I can't eat much and believe me I love my food, am now a size 8 / 10 which is just not me, I have a really sore mouth and tongue as well, think I am literally falling apart and if I keep losing weight will totally disappear ;D, this is sooo nice to talk to someone. X
Dancingirl
The pain in my stomach is just below my boobs and down to my belly button.x
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I would suggest that you speak with your Practice Nurse. It could be reflux up and down behind the breast bone. Have you tried any kind of relief for it, i.e. Rennies ?
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Hi Molly
I found that fluoxetine, SSRI anti depressant helped hugely for the symptoms you described.......
Good luck. I hope you find something that helps. :)
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Oh me too,loved my food,now not interested,just not hungry :'( have you had a ct scan at all? I had a chest one done but showed I was fine,think I'm away to get another one of my lower abdomen,it all just adds to the stress doesn't it?
Keep in touch,it's been so lovely to talk to you
Huuuuuuge hug to you xxx
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I have suffered with indigestion for years and am on lanprazole, so know it's not that .
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Jaypo
Think they have looked at all of me inside and out :o do you suffer with dizzeness, sore mouth and tongue ? Think we both have the same sence of hummer :D
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Hi Molly,how are you today?ive not had a sore mouth but a dry tongue & the occasional canker sore which I believe is associated with gut problems,my daughter has an IBD & she suffers with her mouth.
What a bunch we are,problem is,we feel an ache or pain & bang,helloooooo anxiety & then everything gets 10 times worse.Anyway let me know how you are xx
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I had a sore tongue when I had anaemia.
Taz x