Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: Dancinggirl on October 29, 2017, 09:45:35 AM
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Hi All
I thought you might like to read my email to the FigLeaves website. Anyone else struggling to find some good nightwear?
DG xxx
Hi there
I'm desperately looking for a good nightdress - looked at your site this morning and there was nothing suitable.
I would like to offer a suggestion:
Roughly 50% of women suffer with peri and post menopause symptoms that include night sweats and an inability to control their body temperature generally - so we can really feel the extremes of heat and cold. I am in my 60s and still suffering hot nights or often feeling extremely cold, and for many this never subsides.
Wearing pajamas or anything around the legs, can make our ‘lady bits' really hot, so can encourage thrush, Bacterial Vaginitis, Cystitis and other problems due to excessive sweating in that area - these issues are common after menopause hits.
Looser fitting, yet pretty (hopefully sexy) nightdresses, in fabrics that wick away moisture and help to keep us cool or warm, would be wonderful. I personally like a nightdress that has a ‘V' neck button front with short sleeves, as this is flattering and practical - with neck and shoulder problems it is great to be able to slip the night-dress off downwards instead of over the head.
I don't want a frumpy ‘old ladies' nightdress or a T shirt type night shirt and I don't want skimpy little chemises - I want something that looks and feels really feminine - feeling feminine and desirable as we age is really important.
I'd really like soft fabrics with a good, slightly generous cut, in flattering colours - please avoid patterned fabric if possible. Fine jersey cotton is great but I know there are new fabrics that are helpful for temperature control. So essentially, a nightdress that is soft with a flattering neckline, well cut and in pretty colours - nothing twee, tight and unflattering.
Do look at the website www.menopausematters.co.uk - if you want to find out more. I'm sure you will find there are many customers who would really like someone to produce comfortable, practical(washes well) and sophisticated night-dresses - just because we are over 50, we are definitely ‘not over the hill'.
Do tap into this fast growing market.
Best Wishes
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I've not heard of this company but will go and have a browse - love shopping :)
Let us know if you get any response.
I tend to stick to shorts and vest top type pyjamas as I tend to sleep with a leg thrown out over the duvet - think that's my form of temperature control!
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You have made me think
I sleep naked but maybe if I wore something I could then throw covers off and stay warm
May try it tonight
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What a great idea, I can't sleep with anything more then shorts and thin vest or I wake sweating. Xx
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I have never worn Pyjama bottoms or pants in bed as I tend to be more prone to BV or thrush due to the lack of air circulation - I feel it is good to air ones 'lady bits' as much as possible. One must have to wash the shorts or pyjama bottoms after each wearing as well - a lot of extra washing. DG x
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I wear sleeveless nighties which I buy from M & Co. they're knee length and very comfy. I have to wear cotton pants in bed otherwise OH gets too excited!! 😂😂😂
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When I started with the memo at 42 I was living in a hot country and in desperation one night I borrowed a pair of my husbands cotton boxers. As he has a small frame the medium size were perfect and perfect they were. After a few trial nights I went out and bought 3 different colours and have worn a variety of these ever since along with the stretchy bra tops with no fastenings you can buy in all colours in a lot of shops. The well known department store where a lot of us buy our knickers have a great selection. I have a lovely variety of colours and with a nice wide leg on the shorts I am always comfortable
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Why R U wearing anything at all? :-\
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Why R U wearing anything at all? :-\
My reason for wearing something is a lifelong worry of a housefire breaking out overnight and having to climb down a ladder with firemen underneath :o
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Same here Salad plus I would rather have changed bed clothes when going through meno than constantly changing the sheets. Now I just wouldn't feel comfortable especially when I am desperate for the loo in the night!!!
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Did you get a reply Dancingirl?
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Yes, they did reply. They said there was a nightdress that fitted the description - I had found a DKNY nightie, in grey, but not in my size - it also had longish sleeves which would be too hot for me. They did say they would feed things back to their buyers.
It's been interesting to hear from fellow forum members about this - with so many trips to hotel bathroom in the night I certainly couldn't go naked - I also would get so cold around my shoulders if the covers came away in my sleep and I'd get a ‘frozen' shoulder or back. I'm really surprised that so many of you seem fine wearing pants or shorts - just shows how different we all are with our preferences. DG x
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We never share a bathroom it's always en-suite. We were caught in a fire alarm last year in a Hotel - stupid woman in another room knew that her hair straighteners were dodgy but plugged them in anyway >:( ....... fortunately she told the Manager after the Alarms went [Himself didn't hear them]; by which time we were outside in the early morning sunshine ; who was able to put the Fire Brigade off from attending. I always have a nighty at the bottom of the bed along with mobile and handbag, apparently I flung the nighty on back-2-front ;D
I do wear pyjamas when at Mum's. In case we meet on the landing ::). Otherwise .......
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I used to feel the cold until I became peri, I slept in pants, vest top and socks (passion killer) and had an electric blanket and a thick duvet.
Now I can't stand to wear socks or pants in bed, occasionally I lose the vest top. The electric blanket is at the tip and has been replaced by a 'chillow'.
Finding practical yet stylish nightwear is at the top of my list just now so I'm following this thread with excited anticipation :)
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Being well past the hot flush stage I don't mind sleeves on a nightdress for winter, but do not wear anything below the waist as it is better for my VA. I have similar problems to you DG, when it comes to finding anything suitable and non-frumpy. If I do find anything it seems I can have any colour I Iike as long as it's grey. Well done for writing to them.
JP xx
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Make your own? We have a meno-choir, a charabanc, a gardening club ..... sewing B next :whist:
I have my lleccy blanket on until I get suddenly warm ..... as my lower legs and feet feel cold.
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I'm following this very excitedly 😂 (yup, I'm that sad!)
My teenage daughter finds my obsession with not being able to find nightdresses that I like hilarious!
Dancing girl you're spot on!
They need to be....stretchy, not too short, NOT a shapeless t shirt, NOT a naff “granny†pattern or colour, cooling, NOT transparent or too revealing but still sexy, with attractive shaped shoulders (not thin straps that dig in) and ideally a deepest v-neckline, not long sleeves, and a moisture wicking fabric preferable or at least soft cotton.......
(And .....be made in sizes larger than a 14!)
Maybe we should go into business?😉
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LizzyD and sparkle
There really is a hole in the market. That's why I emailed this company - I thought it would be good for their business. There is an American company that is producing meno nighties but the designs are not that good.
I think I may try contacting John Lewis and maybe M&S to see if they want to make the most of this opportunity?? I actually think there is a real shortage of pretty nightwear generally - everything is tshirts or pyjamas - I fear for the younger generations sex lives - it's no wonder that men are driven to buying sexy loungerie for wives and girlfriends, if what they face, when climbing into bed is a women wrapped in frumpy stuff🤔☹️
I want to go to bed feeling comfortably and sexy.
Thank you all for your feedback ladies - so interesting.
DG. X
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Oh Hope22 - I know exactly what you mean - you are not alone. The meno is very tough to cope with for many us and can have a crushing effect on our feminine confidence; feeling desirable (sexy) is very important for libido, so feeling hot, sweaty, bloated, etc. will certainly kill any libido left when our hormones abandon us.
I worked as a Personal Presentations Consultant for many years - helping people with their wardrobe, voice, body language and general interpersonal skills. Low self esteem is rife, particularly amongst women over 45. How we look or dress shouldn't matter but feeling attractive and stylish can really help with self confidence. If we value ourselves by looking our best this is sending a strong message and will attract positive responses from others. It can take very little time or money to achieve this but finding the right type of clothing can be very challenging - especially as fashion trends change so rapidly. For me, not being able to find a pretty nightie, that makes me feel desirable, is a real sticking block.
I used to work with a clients wardrobe, helping them put together whole new outfits from their existing clothes. I would identify clothing items that worked really well, and crucially, highlight why this clothing worked, so the client knew what elements to look for when shopping for clothes in the future, whatever the fashions.
Here are one or two of my top tips:
1. Do a wardrobe edit; so get everything out of your wardrobe and drawers. Make piles of things your wear most of the time and look at everything else and if they aren't ‘special occasion outfits' or you haven't worn them for 2 years, then they should go to charity. Technically, you should be able to create a special occasion outfit from day to day clothing by adding accessories and if we do have something extra special to go to, we tend to want something new - so why hang onto something taking up space in the wardrobe??? If you spend a lot of money on a ‘special occasion outfit' could it then be adapted for other areas of your life?
2. Try on your favourite outfits and have a good long look in the mirror - are they simply comfortable OR are they flattering, comfortable and make you feel attractive and appropriately dressed? This might give you tips about what to look for when buying new clothes. Even casual clothes should be flattering! ;) ;)
3. Can each item of clothing in your wardrobe be worn, at least, 3 different ways? Apart from underwear of course! ::)
4. Make a list of things you need - when you next go shopping be on the look out to fill those gaps in your wardrobe - also try to shop on your own so you can take time to assess what you like and not be influenced by another persons taste.
5. Be careful of SALE bargains: if nobody else bought these things, then there probably was a good reason!!
I could go on and on - I hope this is helpful. This has reminded me that it is time for me to do a wardrobe edit myself ;D
DG x
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Thank you for that I will give it a go over the weekend. As for the night dress might it be a good idea to contact some designers instead of the companies that sell them.