Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => All things menopause => Topic started by: Cathypops on August 22, 2017, 12:38:59 PM
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I had a Mirena coil fitted last February 2016. I also have HRT patches. It all works fine BUT, my other half seems to be keeping a distance from me. I have no natural lubrication anymore, we are into the no physical contact scenario and have been for over a year. It makes me sad, because I would like physical contact like we used to do. I am getting paranoid that he doesn't fancy me any more and that he is peed of with me. I don't know how to re-ignite things, so to speak...any advice would be most welcome. Thank you in advance xxx
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Hi Cathypops
I found that the mirena coil suppressed my sex drive (I've now had it removed and everything is fine). Are you on anti-depressants of any kind, they are notorious for suppressing libido? Also, have you considered testosterone? I use a tiny blob of testim daily and as well as improving drive and response it also makes me feel like an attractive woman again - pretty much like I was in my pre meno days, and something I'm very grateful for x
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Thank you very much for your reply. No, I am not on antidepressants (although I was several years ago). What do you think I need to do to make things change for the better?
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Where do you get testim from?
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I would look into local oestrogen as the dryness is caused by VA , vaginal atrophy.
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I found the Mirena coil flattened my sex drive but the longer it was in, the more the progesterone wore off and the better I felt. I'm afraid in my case, it was the same old story, the progesterone dose was just too high for me.
One way you might be able to get round it is to increase your oestrogen dose and add testosterone. I used oestrogen patches with the coil (I eventually got up to 100mcg) and it didn't delivery enough oestrogen but I think Oestrogel (you rub it on your skin) would have worked better because I absorb it better. Why not give it a try before giving up with the coil altogether?
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Cathypops do you still want Sex ?
It's important you speak to your hubby about this side of things
When I lost my Sex drive my fiancé stopped making advances because he said it felt 'wrong', but I told him I still want that contact and closeness but I needed lubrication and even if I didn't orgasm, I'd still enjoy the closeness
You could try Sylk for lubrication but if you're sore vaginally even without Sex you will need oestrogen down there, either as a cream or pessary
I use testosterone and I'm sure it's that that is giving me lubrication, it's like the old days where sometimes I just feel wet down there for no reason
Don't suffer, read our experiences throughout the forum and see what you'd like to try. I do find it helps your case with gp if you know what products you want to try and explain your symptoms . And above all, be open and honest with hubby and talk about how you want things to change for the better xx
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Annie, how much gel do you use to be able to use the T? I'm struggling with puffy eyes with more than 1/2 pump of gel. My own e and t are not really low, but I need some vaginal lubrication
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I use vagifem if not daily, every other day
2.5 pumps oestrogel
3/4 pump (three quarters not 3 or 4!) Tostran gel
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HI Cathypops
I got testim from my GP but I had to be referred to a specialist first (all on the nhs). Once the specialist prescribed it I can have it forever as it's on my notes. I think some GP's are more open to it than others, for example my sister lives in Scotland and has just been refused it, while here in Yorkshire it's been relatively straightforward. Like Annie says it does wonders physiologically.
Also, as Maryjane says VA can be treated. I use vagifem (pessary) and ovestin (externally) twice a week and this definitely helps with lubrication. Although it's the testosterone that's made me feel like a sexual being again.
Wishing you luck, and don't give up there's loads you can do x