Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => New Members => Topic started by: pegginout on December 14, 2016, 06:57:09 PM
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Newbie here, first post.
I am nearly 47 and at then end of my tether!
I feel so anxious, forgetful, snappy, sometimes I feel dizzy, not sleeping very well, my memory has moved out, I just don't have one!!! My heart even skips a beat sometimes.
I keep sweating even when it's cold (weird!) .
I currently don't take any medication but just wish it would stop.
I don't like feeling this way, I'm scared because I feel like the old Peg has moved out and I don't like this new Peg, she is a nutcase!
I don't like what I have become and want it to stop.
Is it worth seeing my GP?
I feel like I'm just going to be pigeon holed as Menopausal when to me it is such a huge emotional thing to happen.
My husband has just kindly informed me that I've been a right bitch this evening and he is going to bed to get out of my way.
I am gutted, I didn't know I was that bad.
I feel like a Psychotic Witch!
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Oh pegginout I could have written this myself, we're even the same age...
it's too awful for words...yes it's worth seeing your GP, do you have a half decent one? It can be upsetting to finally get the nerve together to go to your GP if they are dismissive.
They might try to give you antidepressants, which work well for some women I think, I could never take them because of the side effects. Hopefully they will do some bloods to check your hormone levels.
It feels so unfair to be 'rewarded' with this...sorry I'm probably not being very helpful, just wanted you to know you're not alone!
...my daughter has taken to spending more time in her room lately too xx
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Thanks for swift reply.
I just feel helpless, like my life as I know it is over.
My son is growing up so fast (15) and I miss him being my little boy,I have to keep remembering he is a man nearly not my little son.
I miss holding his hand and being the centre of his universe, now I am just there to feed and taxi the teenager ::)
I guess I am just finding it difficult to come to terms with.
I AM GETTING OLD AND I STILL THINK I AM 25! :'(
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:bighug: It's The Change :sigh:
How are your periods in the last couple of years? Mine waxed and waned and eventually stopped.
GPs can be au fait with menopausal symptoms, always best to make a list of symptoms and make a double appt., either with the Practice Nurse or a GP. Browse round the Forum. Make notes. Some ladies find keeping a diary of food/symptoms/ can help chart what is happening.
There is a page here for husbands/partners - print it off and give to your husband. It can help to have a buzz word to, for him to throw at you when you are OTT!
Empty nest syndrome is common. It has been mentioned here too, as well as various symptoms including vaginal atrophy.
There is usually someone here to listen …….
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Hi pegginout
:welcomemm:
If you have begin to skip periods and your cycle is lengthening then you are definitely entering the peri-menopausal transition - in which case you would not need blood tests and HRT should be available to you to alleviate your symptoms - and it works first on sweats and flushes.
You doc should not prescribe you anti-depressants - or if s/he does then you are justified in refusing them because the NICE Guidelines say that they should not be used as first line of treament for menopausal symptoms in women who are peri-menopausal!
If your periods are completely regular then HRT can be hit and miss and some women find the Pill helps to regulate the cycle and mood swings - there are a couple of types (QLAIRA and ZOELY) which contain estradiol - the same oestrogen as in most HRT which is the one bio-identical with our own oestrogen.
There is no point in suffering!
Empty Nest Syndrome CLKD??? Umm.... her son is only 15 - very much present - and if anything like my 3 sons - making his presence felt!!!! I think it is the growing up phase that pegginout is referring to - we all feel wistful about the passing of each stage of our little ones.....well I did anyway! I remember one of my sons at 4.5 before he went to school - playing happily by himself for ages - and my thinking he doesn't need me all the time any more - this phase has past!!!
Hurdity x
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You doc should not prescribe you anti-depressants - or if s/he does then you are justified in refusing them because the NICE Guidelines say that they should not be used as first line of treament for menopausal symptoms in women who are peri-menopausal!
Hurdity x
My GP did this, after a huge long history of not being able to tolerate ADs, they prescribed me Pregabalin for the anxiety...it was horrible, felt like a zombie! Sometimes I think that if they can't throw meds at it they don't know what else to do. I know someone else the same age who is taking Citalopram prescribed to help with hot flushes....
Surely better to at least try to treat the cause than throwing these meds with all their side effects at the symptoms...
sorry it makes me kinda mad...although some women find them helpful, who knows, it really puts me off going to the doc!
The Change is no fun...sorry to hijack with my rantings!
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I have PCOS so my periods have never been regular, they are just a lot shorter, and less heavy.
I also have a history of PTSD & Depression in the post natal period.
I no longer take ADs and don't really want to take them again as I don't feel depressed, just anxious.
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Shame this web site forum doesn't have a clear 'sticky' post for the many posts like yours.
Sounds like you are peri menopausal and the symptoms are entirely consistent with that
Do read around thoroughly before going to your GP and the varying different views on here first.
Informed information is power!
Personally I think the Ad's don't work for what are primarily hormonal changes, unless you have underlying issues pre peri menopause.
The hormonal imbalance needs to be treated first, not by AD's.
I first came on this forum back in March this year.
My 12 year old GP was crap- told me I was too old in my early 50's to increase my crap tablet form of HRT, offered AD's which I didn't want as I knew it was hormonal, so I ended up paying to see a specialist privately (Prof Studd) as my oestrogen levels were lower than most adult men.
Got prescribed oestrogen gel (Estrogel) plus tiny amount of Testim (testerone gel) each day and never looked back. Also get progesterone tablets at 100 mg for 7 days each month- lower than the NICE guidelines (who have their own agenda) but works very well for me and other women on MM.
I get it all prescribed on the NHS too.
Often women with PND and a history of PCOS have been treated inappropriately in the past (i.e. their hormonal imbalances have been overlooked or ignored)
The HRT gels and tablets are all proven to be safer and far more effective than tablets and/or patches
Some women like the tablets and/or patch versions of HRT- I didn't as they weren't effective. There is no 'one size fits all' formula.
So do some research first and please remember there aren't any qualified medics posting on this forum, so ALL opinions are really subjective.
PM me if you want any more information.
Freckles x
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Hi Freckles
How easily you explain everything and good to hear that HRT is the answer. As my AD for last 3 years have done nothing for me. I have been prescribed Tibolone ( half a tablet) by gynae who works with Dr Studd in Sydney. Too early for me to say anything. I hope I can find something suitable for my self. Please let me know if you have heard any thing about Tibolone and its failure or success.
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Some good advice re ADs, I wish I had known about the NICE guidelines before I accepted my prescription...I think some GPs see you have anxiety issues on your notes (linked to hormones) and therefore any problems you go to see them with are probably because of that, is so belittling :(
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Hello and welcome to the forum. these ladies have all given you very sound advice, you won't have to suffer forever but it could take a little time to stabilise your hormonal upheaval. There is plenty of support here, I cannot recommend it highly enough. :welcomemm:
Please reassure your dear husband and son that you are neither psychotic nor a crackpot nor a bitch but you might need some help over this stage of your life. Yes, the 'advice for husbands and partners' sheet is very useful.
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"You doc should not prescribe you anti-depressants - or if s/he does then you are justified in refusing them because the NICE Guidelines say that they should not be used as first line of treament for menopausal symptoms in women who are peri-menopausal! "
However …… if a person suffers with depression and/or anxiety and medication is known to help, sometimes quicker than any HRT suggested, then accepting that ADs are the way to go is important. We don't know what any lady here presents to her GP with, she may not have mentioned her lack of periods or anything relating to peri-menopause - a GP will prescribe if necessary with what he/she hears.
pegginout - some ADs have been shown to ease anxiety symptoms do try not to dismiss what your GP suggests out of hand!
Did you print out the 'advice for husbands' ? As for empty nest syndrome, some ladies think too far ahead and being to mourn their children B4 they have moved on ::)
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I hadn't extensive blood tests done and I am fit & well, just slightly aneamic so I'm trying to up the green veg!
I will not take ADs unless I'm depressed. I'm a bloody expert on this subject and can truly say I am not depressed, I just 'don't feel myself'
ADS play a huge part in saving many lives from suicide etc, I always say that if people had diabetes they wouldn't think twice about taking insulin to help this, and depression is no different, it's a chemical imbalance of the brain and should be treated as such, with medication.
It's just the emotions I m finding difficult to deal with at the moment.
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I agree pegginout …….. I didn't want to take ADs initially but they have been a life saver.
I had dreadful pre-menstrual anger, one day I could deal with something, the following a similar issue would cause me to rage ……… and throw things though never anything of value ::). The rage would come out of no-where :-[
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CLKD - I was the same with the rage, it was awful :-\ it's calmed down a lot
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Many years ago I threw a wet dishcloth at Himself: who wrung it out onto the kitchen floor B4 walking away: which meant that I had to clean the kitchen floor, I never threw anything again ;D
I've been known to kick doors though ??? :-X
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But throwing things feels so good...I threw my new iPhone at the wall today, my first phone-fling ever...didn't break luckily, got a good case for it...we should invent the 'meno phone case' for extra impact. There is a lovely outline on my bedroom wall though.
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I thrown things twice in my life
First was a rock dummy you get at the seaside, the kids were arguing over it so I launched it and it shattered on the ceiling and walls
Second was a cup of cold coffee over an ex when he fessed to being unfaithful
I'm mild natured really
X
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I thrown things twice in my life
First was a rock dummy you get at the seaside, the kids were arguing over it so I launched it and it shattered on the ceiling and walls
Second was a cup of cold coffee over an ex when he fessed to being unfaithful
I'm mild natured really
X
I like your style ;D
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Ohhhh - he didn't pick his moment did he ::).
Temper runs in our family so I grew up thinking it was OK to let rip ……….. until I realised the over-all impact. Then I had to curb my temper but OH HORMONES :bang: :bang: :bang: - I could spit bricks! Himself used to take me to our calendar when I was extra ratty and point ……….. :-X. I'm still prone to muttering at the TV, waving at bad drivers, reporting people using their phones whilst driving …….
How has your evening been pegginout?
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Hi girls...newbie here too not sure if im posting right but hoping for support too! I AM actually that psycho with one foot in the edge & the other dangling over!! Im 42 been peri for several years (history of it in family) only had couple of periods in last 2 yrs but the last 10 mths been horrrrrendous....depression/moods/brain doesnt work/crying/anxiety/im anti social/marriage is falling apart/my 2 kids who are heading for teens I feel are all grown up (i know its in my head but the feelings are there) Hot flushes/ nights sweats/weight gain round the middle (very difficult as was always slim, gone up 2 dress sizes in last year!) Nobody understands as my friends are my age & colleagues are too!! Oh forgot the vaginal atrophy & leaking wee too! My head tells me mr grim reaper is just having his break but he'll b round for me later...sure theres nothing left is ther??
So i go private & yep for sure I need to be on HRT... please lord this will help. Ive just started femoston 2/10mg....4 days in i forget one, see what mensa material youre dealing with here ::) And get vaginal pessaries to get some lub back up there not that theres any action happening in that dept and i have the sex drive of a do do bird! Seriously at 42 only ???Anyhow as it happens my bloods showed that my thyroid is quite underactive to so iv started Eltroxin 50mg...only a few days in!
Forgot to mention history of depression in the family, ive been on ADs & suffer with chronic pain which is another matter! But i cant even remember what i was even asking now...but have been reading these posts and dont feel so alone so thanks but any other advice greatly appreciated. #insanemomma
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Hi Sparkle324 and welcome. We have another Sparkle on the forum too :)
You are so fortunate to get Eltroxin, is that NHS or privately? I was on Eltroxin for many years then it was withdrawn and I was given a generic levothyroxine. My levels became unstable and it is only in the past year I have settled on a generic brand that suits me.
May I suggest you pop over to the New Members section and make a post there introducing yourself, then more members will see it and welcome you. Your post might get a bit lost in here.
Browse round some more and join in :welcomemm:
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:welcomemm: from me too ! Browse round, make notes! Join The Club, we don't bite …..
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Ah thanks girls for all the replies...you are all fantastic & i really appreciate it. I will put post on new members wen i figure out how....im a bit like a child trying to work out hand eye co ordination atm ::) damn hormones!
@babyjane (not sure how to tag...seriously im usually so sharp at all these things but sponge bob brain is not lol) i live in the republic of ireland & eltroxin is the usual prescribed drug for hypothyroidism. Only a few days in so cant even say yet how its going.. ::)
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Hi Sparkle324
:welcomemm: from me too!
It's OK - you are in the new members Section!
Great that you have started HRT because at your young age you definitely need it to help protect your bones and heart! Also good news that you are being treated for underactive thyroid appropriately. Do make sure that the doctors check your thyroid levels regularly in the coming months and years because the thyroid medication may well need adjustment when on HRT and especially oral HRT so may need a bit of tweaking to get all your levels so that you feel well.
Did you suffer from depression before your periods started becoming irregular or do you think it coincided with your hormones going awry? If the latter then HRT is definitely the most appropriate treatment!
Do hope you start to feel better really soon :)
Let us know how you get on :)
Hurdity x
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:welcomemm:
Welcome, Sparkle324! You're in good company here. :) You're a wee soul! I'm so glad to hear that you've started HRT - I hope it starts to give you some much needed relief soon.
Ladies - on the anger front. NEVER. I've never had rage at all during this journey (but give it time, I'm sure there's scope)! I tend to direct everything inward. Maybe I should reverse that trend - it might make me feel a whole lot better. I've been very frustrated many times, sure. So far, Hubby and DS have not had to learn to duck though! ;)
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I thrown things twice in my life
First was a rock dummy you get at the seaside, the kids were arguing over it so I launched it and it shattered on the ceiling and walls
Second was a cup of cold coffee over an ex when he fessed to being unfaithful
I'm mild natured really
X
I like your style ;D
I swear I don't have a temper!
im naturally a very placid person (it's been said to me numerous times) but like everyone I do have a fuse and buttons
X
Ps that ex deserved the mug smashed on his head too but I like having a clean criminal record
X
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Thanks again so much for replies! I suffered with very bad post partum depression on 1st child & history of depression with my father too! Im only a week in on the hrt but already feeling calmer..dont know if its a bit of pseudo feeling given im off work & looking forward to xmas...time will tell. But if anything its defo giving me a bit more clarity around how very awful ive been REALLY feeling over the last 6 months. And i suppose with the thyroid i wasnt just 'lazy' cos i just cudnt keep my eyes open....party animal me ;D ;D ;D
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What ever is giving you the calmer feelings, don't knock it ;)