Menopause Matters Forum

General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: Annie0710 on November 06, 2016, 04:27:41 AM

Title: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Annie0710 on November 06, 2016, 04:27:41 AM
It's 04.25 and I've given up trying to sleep through fiancés weird noises and snoring whilst he sleeps soundly

Anyone else suffer ? Apart from suffocating him does any OTC thingy-me-jig Work ?

X
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Elizabethrose on November 06, 2016, 08:09:13 AM
My husband does..... ;)

I live with a man who listens to BBC comedy programmes on his iPhone constantly laughing out loud, who regularly kicks out with his feet viciously at some 'dreamed' assassin, who breathes so deeply it sounds like the soundtrack of a horror movie   :o, who wiggles constantly all through the night, whose legs are constantly moving and jiggling the bed.

We found the  perfect solution....separate bedrooms!!

Hahaha, just read your message Sparkle, 'Dare I ask, is your fiance on the larger side?' Hahaha, you crack me up! :rofl:
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Annie0710 on November 06, 2016, 08:22:38 AM
Lol

Yes he is a big man! To be fair he's naturally big anyway, tall and muscular and snored then, but now he's even chunkier and yes because of his frame I guess he does have a big neck.  it's not always the typical snoring, he makes funny noises and falls off kerbs constantly in his sleep, he rasps loudly then breaths in my face like a gale force wind but with morning breath lol

It's never been as bad as my ex, I really detested that man during the night as even my pillow would vibrate and my fiancé is always apologetic in the morning

Funny thing is, if he does it on the sofa it evens wakes him up but not in bed, I poke and prod him to change positions but he moves soon after and so it starts again, and fortunately it's not every night, or at least it doesn't wake me every night

X
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Ju Ju on November 06, 2016, 09:32:04 AM
Record him snoring! Play it back to him! Wake him up with his own snoring!

Communication, respect and caring for each other is key here. No one snores intentionally. It's a matter of looking at solutions that suit you and your situation. My DH snores, though he is not overweight, so weight loss will not help here as it does for many people. We are making use of the spare room and will up grade the bed. We don't want to sleep separately, so start the night together, then one of us can escape if need be. Part of the problem is that I no longer sleep so well anyway, one of my menopausal issues, so disturbances like snoring, DHs restless leg syndrome and restlessness due to back problems have a greater impact on me.
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Pennyfarthing on November 06, 2016, 10:47:43 AM
Last night I slept with three snorers in the house!

Hubby always snores. Mum  was staying and we have to sleep with doors open when she's here in case she falls and she was snoring her head off.    Just got off to sleep and about 2 am heard son come in and within minutes he was snoring.
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Elizabethrose on November 06, 2016, 12:08:55 PM
Haha, if I were you Sparkle, I'd buy those girls of yours bunk beds!

Amidst the total chaos we were in last night where our son had to climb over a pile of furniture to get into a bed and we had to do the same, my hubby looked at me and said, "You'd better not snore!". He then proceeded to do the Fandango for much of the night and snore like a trucker. What was it you said Ju Ju about communication, respect and caring?!!  ::)
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: cubagirl on November 06, 2016, 01:25:06 PM
I gave up a couple of years ago & took to another bedroom. Used to use sofa if his snoring was bad, but if Im not asleep by time he comes to bed I can forget it! He snores on the sofa, reckon he could snore standing on his head. I don't like sleeping alone, but needs must.

As for recording the decibels, I tried it once & hubby sounded like a pussycat, not the roaring lion which keeps me awake. In fact he can even wake me from other side of the house some nights, he's that loud!!!
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Elizabethrose on November 06, 2016, 01:38:29 PM
Haha Cubagirl, my husband says I make noises like no percussion orchestra ever could. On holiday he said he was staring at me in the semi dark trying to work out where the noises actually come from!! Teehee..... in my defence, I only snore when I'm in migraine (though it has to be said, that's pretty frequently!).
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Annie0710 on November 06, 2016, 01:43:15 PM
Aw you poor ladies !

I take my moan back, he doesn't sound bad now you've all described your hubbys

Although, our shih-zhu kept me awake too, he's snoring sounding like men talking in the house !

X
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Ju Ju on November 06, 2016, 01:46:31 PM
Haha, if I were you Sparkle, I'd buy those girls of yours bunk beds!

Amidst the total chaos we were in last night where our son had to climb over a pile of furniture to get into a bed and we had to do the same, my hubby looked at me and said, "You'd better not snore!". He then proceeded to do the Fandango for much of the night and snore like a trucker. What was it you said Ju Ju about communication, respect and caring?!!  ::)

 ;D perhaps a temper tantrum and feet stamping might be the way to go! Just occasionally I have been known to throw a strop!

And Cubagirl, I wish I could lend you the blue tooth thingy my son gave us last Christmas, then you could ratch up the sound! Wake him up!
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 06, 2016, 05:05:55 PM
A good shove in the ribs does it in this house.  Then he grunts and turns over.

Seriously though.  If your OH is over-weight then he is in danger of sleep apnoea which can be fatal.  I used to wake up because my husband had stopped breathing.  Although our GP assured us that he wouldn't die, that he would eventually  :-\ breath, I could never wait so always gave him a shove  ::).

Apparently I've been snoring in recent weeks, Himself had to wake me in the camper …… no way of getting away from me  ;D.  It was since my recent cold and I think I have a small nasal polyp.  He had to wake me in the earlier hours during the week  ::) ……….

Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 06, 2016, 05:17:21 PM
Who does the shopping and cooking Sparkle  ;D
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: cubagirl on November 06, 2016, 06:10:32 PM
My hubby snacks all day too. Though after recent chest infection he has lost some weight. Still snores!  ;D
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: breeze on November 06, 2016, 06:19:12 PM
I snore :(

Not all the time apparently, but I do have spells when I make the walls rattle.

Come on girls, who else does.  I've owned up, so can you. ;D
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: cubagirl on November 06, 2016, 06:23:38 PM
Me, or so I've been told. Not sure about making walls rattle. I was cruel when hubby told me. I said "So there is a God!"  ;D
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Annie0710 on November 06, 2016, 06:44:45 PM
Oh my days !!!!!

Not sure if he's fibbing but he's just told me I snore most nights lol

He said it doesn't stop him sleeping but he hears if he's having a restless night 🙈

X
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Elizabethrose on November 06, 2016, 07:45:55 PM
Not just me then?!  ;)
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: breeze on November 06, 2016, 08:00:25 PM
AHH! confession is good for the soul ;)
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Elizabethrose on November 06, 2016, 08:12:50 PM
Haha, Breeze, I owned up ages ago!! x
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Hurdity on November 06, 2016, 08:16:30 PM
I snore :(

Not all the time apparently, but I do have spells when I make the walls rattle.

Come on girls, who else does.  I've owned up, so can you. ;D

Yes me! I was going to start a new thread about this if my husband complained again! I was reading through this thread with dismay - looking at all of you complaining about your overweight snoring husbands and thinking oh dear!

It's not just about weight - I am not fat - only about 3 pounds heavier than I want to be at the moment so it's not that!!! I snore whether I've had alcohol or not, and I'm on systemic HRT so I haven't completely gone all floppy re collagen and tissues. My husband says it's when I'm on my back but not always - but I have to turn over onto my back as I have a painful shoulder which half wakes me. I even woke myself up the other night and realised it was my snoring  ;D. My husband snores a little (he's not fat either - very lean indeed) but mainly if he's had a few drinks otherwise not really - well I never wake up to listen as I'm too busy snoring myself!

In my case I also sleep much more deeply than I used to and especially usually for the first few hours ( as long as I haven't drunk anything at all near to bedtime in which case bladder wakes me), but I always wake up very sleepy and my husband has to wake me. I need a pint of tea and usually totally non compos mentis for the first 20 mins - I just  say "huh" if he asks me anything after bringing the second mug....I am often tired in the day too so I think it's all related - maybe sub-clinical underactive thyroid - or at least not functioning as it should.

Ooh I wouldn't do the separate rooms thing ever (unless either of us are ill) - and my husband only suggest it in jest - we just bought a new bed (King Size) which is fine if you're not big people (I'm short and slim, he's medium height and slim) - and a new mattress (one of those pocket thingies) so we have plenty of space to stretch - apart from my rumblings that is... ;D

Oops got carried away there   ::)

OK breeze!!!!!

Hurdity x

Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 06, 2016, 08:18:28 PM
 :rofl:
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Annie0710 on November 06, 2016, 08:23:52 PM
Lol Hurdity !

I'm not overweight either , I'm still iffy if he is fibbing about me

I couldn't do separate rooms either, I like to put my leg over him to get to sleep so would bite off my nose to spite my face if I weren't in the bed, besides my meno loss of libido meant it was extra important to me (and him) to remain physically close until I got help to restore it

X
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 06, 2016, 08:28:23 PM
We have biscuits in the house for months: OK until the packet is opened   ::).  Himself eats far more fruit than I can face each day, we do eat lots of fresh veg. ……….. we need more exercise but of course, that leads to the already opened biscuit packet once home  :D
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Tinkerbell on November 06, 2016, 08:37:43 PM
I chucked mine into our youngest's old nursery room...so smallest in the house last year. He is in there five nights a week, I just couldn't stand the lack of sleep I was getting from his snoring and he also kicks out in his sleep so much that I slept on the edge!
I feel so more energised now and realise how disturbed a night I was getting.
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: getting_old on November 06, 2016, 08:47:07 PM
OH and I had separate rooms for a few years before we split up as a result of his snoring. He has sinus issues but his snoring got much worse as he has piled on the pounds, and I can hear him from his room so use a white noise machine to block the noise out.
Sleep, even disturbed by meno etc., is so important that I decided I would prefer my own room so I got as much sleep as I could.
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Hurdity on November 06, 2016, 08:49:08 PM
Biscuits CLKD  :o - what has that got to do with snoring  ;D

Oh dear Tinkerbell - I would absolutely hate it if my husband decamped. We have been together for many many years and like Annie0710 I also need him curled round me to help me get to sleep (so that I can snore away quite happily - not for libido!!!) and my feet are always so cold despite having an electric blanket - although lately I have been banned from warming them on his legs they are so cold!

I now worry about what happens when we go camping - how many people do I keep awake - but hopefully most people are so relaxed with a few drinks inside them they won't wake up anyway!!

Hurdity x
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Tinkerbell on November 06, 2016, 09:39:19 PM
Huridity...I do miss the cuddles on a cold night and I wouldn't want to sleep alone every night, but I was worried about my sanity because of lack of sleep :-\
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Annie0710 on November 06, 2016, 10:10:48 PM
My daughter and son-in-law have resorted to him on sofa (his choice where) and her in bed with baby no 3 next to her in her cot, she's still breastfeeding at 9 months and granddaughter is a bugger for not sleeping that now he is downstairs it means my daughter can co sleep as necessary, as before no one was getting any sleep !

We talk about everything (mainly my meno lol) and I said whatever works go for it but always remember to keep the physical closeness going as well as the friendship, so they cuddle each evening then he kicks her off the sofa when he's ready for bed

I sidetracked there a bit, another reason was he's not a snorer but he grunts and grinds his teeth when asleep !

X
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Pennyfarthing on November 07, 2016, 09:19:46 AM
I was told this morning that I snored all night and sounded like a whining cat!  ;D. I have to sleep on my back due to my painful knee .... that's my excuse anyway.  ;)
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 07, 2016, 11:23:57 AM
Do keep up Hurdity "Trouble is he snacks on biscuits" !
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: getting_old on November 07, 2016, 06:53:18 PM
Sleeping in separate rooms is a very personal choice and I wouldn't for one minute suggest its right for everyone, but if it works for you ... pure magic, especially if your partner's a snorer and you value your sanity, and you have the space.

We're about to move to a new house which has two ensuites so even more luxury awaits  :)  We both feel exactly the same and have NEVER EVER been able to sleep entwined, we always migrated to our own sides of the bed for sleeping. I guess its called compatibility LOL.

We've been happily wed for nearly 40 years, so I don't think we've got cause to worry!!

PS Camping and snoring - OH used to do both until one morning two little girls walked past our tent hand in hand and the one pointed and grimacing said "that man in there snores and keeps us awake"  - he was mortified ;D

how much did you pay them  ;)
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 07, 2016, 07:03:33 PM
 :rofl:
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Pennyfarthing on November 07, 2016, 07:53:09 PM
My hubby does this horrible snoring where he snores gently for a while then stops. You think it's all over and then he starts again but it's different in that it's just one HUGE and very loud snort before he goes back to the normal rhythm.

We were on holiday once in Ibiza and the hotel had a lovely terrace right on the waters edge. We lay there on sunbeds and he was in quiet phase and this poor woman walked past his feet just as he did the big loud snort and got such a fright she  very nearly fell in the water below! 
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 07, 2016, 07:59:48 PM
 ;D  …. sounds like sleep apnoea …...
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Elizabethrose on November 07, 2016, 09:07:49 PM
Whoa, I'm with you on that Stellajane, I don't think either of us has ever slept so well. We too have been together for 40 years, in about a week, and have never been snugglers when sleeping. Certainly hugs etc but there had always been a clear demarcation line in our bed. ‘Get over your side' was a regular cry!
We have very easily adjusted to having a king size bed each and my husband now sleeps in a star shape. I love sleeping alone and there are enough pesky meno things that disturb me throughout the night without the deep breathing, snoring, mad laughing, Thai boxing, fandango dancer that my husband has become in his sleep!!

It's a complete pain when we are forced to sleep together now, because we know what's in store! The vast majority of my friends are making the most of the space vacated by their kids and those that aren't worry about our sex lives and relationships. I have no idea why!  ;)
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: cubagirl on November 07, 2016, 10:12:08 PM
I'd love a king size bed. Not that it would ease his snoring, or mine for that matter.

I'm a terrible sleeper nowadays. Can take hours to nod off. So between his snoring & my restlessness....... On holiday etc, we manage fine strangely enough, usually a KS bed in hotels.

I asked himself if it bothered him, sleeping separately & he said it was great not having me moaning at him for snoring or stealing the duvet back again.  ::)
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 08, 2016, 12:51:39 PM
I would have to keep going into his room to make sure that he was still alive  ;D

We have a huge bed, we need a mobile to contact each other. 
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Elizabethrose on November 08, 2016, 05:26:50 PM
Apparently he could hear me snoring two rooms away last night! Yeah right already - cook your own dinner!!  :poke2:
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 08, 2016, 07:16:27 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: ariadne on November 10, 2016, 08:57:43 PM
My husbands snoring has worsened so much this year.  He is a little tubby and has a thick neck,  plus rhinitis so lots of reasons why.  Also a bad back that feels better lying on his back.

Theres no way he would want us to have separate rooms but I would like to be able to use the spare room when I just can't sleep for the noise.  However,  the cat has taken over  that room and although not allowed upstairs at night,  she has furred up the whole room and I really wouldnt want to get in that bed.  Its due for decoration soon and I'm thinkingnof banning her from it afterwards so I can use it.

We had a bit of a falling out the other night over the snoring.  It was dreadful and had kept me awake for hours.  Apparently I was snappy and maoned about it as soon as he woke up which he didnt appreciate.  There were a few hours of non speaking.

Things that especially wind me up.  I lie awake for ages hoping the snoring will stop as i dont like to keep nudging him awake and these are some of the responses i get.

Me: Please can you turn over
Hubby: What channel?

Me: Please can you turn over
Hubby: Do you mean me?
Me: No,  I'm talking to the bloke the other side of you.  OF COURSE YOU!!

And the one that really annoys me
Me: please can you turn over
Hubby: Why?
Me: Because you're snoring
Hubby: I'm not even asleep,  I've  been awake all night

Honestly,  I don't know how he sleeps through the noise himself.  I normally wear earplugs but can't wear them at the moment as they've given me eczema or dermatitis in my ears which is so uncomfortable.

Ariadne xx
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Annie0710 on November 10, 2016, 09:23:35 PM
The night my fiancé kept me awake (the night I wrote this thread) I facebooked it too starting with the time (i.e. "It's 4.18am and as much as I love you......"

He got up in the morning replying on FB "6.15am - I'm off to work now you can have a lie in "

I got so many replies, and they all started with the time and what everyone was up to that day !

X
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Cazikins on November 10, 2016, 10:11:25 PM

Me: please can you turn over
Hubby: Why?
Me: Because you're snoring
Hubby: I'm not even asleep,  I've  been awake all night


Are you sleeping with my my husband ariadne?  ;D ;D ;D ;D..

Sounds just like him, & I have tinnitus so what with the buzzing, his snoring there isn't anyway I can get a good nights sleep.

Cazi xx
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 11, 2016, 03:54:08 PM
Snoring may be a sign of serious illness particularly in men! 

Nice to hear from you Ariadne - our cat would yowl if he couldn't get into a room  ::) and when he grew to full size, he was able to open the door  ;D

Continue with the nudging?  That's what I do and it works ……… if anyone has to leave our bed, it ain't going to be me!
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Elizabethrose on November 11, 2016, 04:01:22 PM
Snoring may be a sign of serious illness particularly in men! 

Nice to hear from you Ariadne - our cat would yowl if he couldn't get into a room  ::) and when he grew to full size, he was able to open the door  ;D

Continue with the nudging?  That's what I do and it works ……… if anyone has to leave our bed, it ain't going to be me!

Haha, that's exactly what I said CLKD!!

Last night I was on a role: I was dreaming about inconsiderate builders drilling - it was me snoring! Teehee, don't think he heard! ;)
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 11, 2016, 04:03:49 PM
 :rofl:
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: ellie on November 11, 2016, 05:15:04 PM
Stellajane  just read your post......I was feeling down today until I read it   :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :thankyou:
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: ariadne on November 17, 2016, 02:34:24 AM
Well its nearly 2. 30 a.m and  I'm downstairs as I've  been lying awake since 11.30 listening to the most horrendous snoring.  Hubby is very conscious of the snoring problem  and keeps apologising.  He'd put a pillow between us in the hope it would stop him turning onto his back but he snores in any position. He will be upset tomorrow cos he doesn't like us sleeping apart 😊

The cat is now nuzzling me and purring profusely -  nearly as bad as hubby's snoring 😬😬

Ariadne xx
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: CLKD on November 17, 2016, 01:02:12 PM
 ;D ……. bag of cold peas handy?!?  I much prefer a cat's purring than anyone snoring.
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Dennylou48 on November 27, 2016, 11:44:17 PM
I get all you ladies that get a better nights sleep in another room because your hubbys snore, mine is horrendous and I have recorded him loads of times, between him snoring and my night sweats and restless legs I wasn't getting any sleep and I was so tease and miserable, especially knowing that 3 of the next mornings I have my grandchildren which are aged 2,2 and three. I can't bear him touching me cos he is like a fire and yes he is over weight too. It's worse when he has been on the beer, omg the house rattles. But he understands me and I reassure him that I do love him , lol xxx
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: cubagirl on November 28, 2016, 07:43:07 AM
Having just spent two nights in hotel with hubby, I can honestly say I'm glad I now sleep on my own. Had 2 hours sleep on eve of son's wedding!!!  :-\
Title: Re: Live with a snorer ?!
Post by: Pennyfarthing on November 28, 2016, 08:53:57 AM
What we all need are beds like we often get on holiday abroad.  This year we had two x approx 4 ft beds pushed together and it was bliss with all that space.  If hubby snored I didn't hear him and we both slept well.

At home we have a standard double bed so he's snoring right in my ear!  :'(. I value the space between us on holiday. :)