Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: linz57 on October 25, 2016, 12:42:33 PM
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Pin back your lugholes ladies and listen to this. Ok, it's a written post but you know what I mean.
I got my long awaited appointment with a gynae to discuss my problem with my current hrt today and I've come out absolutely dumbfounded.
All he could say was hrt was evil and lots of the symptoms are psychological. He then went on at great lengths to extol the virtues of soya oil, linseed oil and positive thinking.
I told him that nothing but estrogen works for my problems but he kept reiterating that supplements will work just as well. I half expected him to write a prescription for snake oil !!
He wants me off hrt , although I can continue with Vagifem or estradiol cream . Oh yes, and if the atrophy gets too much I can rub soya oil into my privates!! What the hell? Needless to say I was not happy with this and I argued my corner , saying that my atrophy isn't just a case of vaginal dryness but a severe case which untreated causes me severe pain and bladder issues. Why oh why do so many doctors think it's all about dryness and painful sex?
I also explained that the hrt greatly reduced my anxiety, palpitations and aches and pains. His reply was " we can't remain 20 forever"
So, what a wasted morning that was but worse still, I fear for any other women who go to see this man and get fobbed off. Luckily I now have a pro hrt GP so I will go along to discuss my appointment with her and I can't wait to hear what she has to say.
One more thing, I have come home and looked for this man online and he isn't mentioned on the list of doctors at the gynae dept at this hospital. I cannot find mention of him anywhere so my question is who exactly was this person I saw? I have rung the hospital since I've been home and explained how I feel and I also said I wasn't happy being put in to see someone with obvious homeopathic leanings.
Not a happy bunny right now, sorry but just had to rant😄
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I feel your anger....VA is awful and I agree some doctors think a dab of lube and everything is hunky dory >:( they don't get the constant burning it feels like you have a bag of chillies in your knickers, you can't sit down, walk around the shops, exercise, obviously no sex etc etc.
As for palpitations, mine have improved since I started systemic HRT it is awful getting those go off all night.
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Send me a PM of his details and I will do a search :-\
Also send details to Dr Currie ……… this Gynae needs to be sent on a refresher course :bang: :bang: :bang:
Let us know what your GP thinks ??!!??
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I think menopause will be like endometriosis - which was undiagnosed for years [I was diagnosed in mid 80s but given no support/information and struggled for years]. I was once asked to rate my period pains on a scale of 1 to 10. I said 6 on the basis that 10 was amputation without pain relief - big mistake, male GP said 'well, not too bad then' and suggested lying down in the afternoons! thankfully for my daughter's generation, endo is now 'mainstream', and doctors know how to treat it and how damaging it is.
My point is that we [unfortunately] are also the generation that is bringing the menopause into the light. It is starting to be talked about online and on TV - even my daughter's friends understand it is more than a few hot flushes. To be fair to men, prostate cancer is also a bit more in the news, my Dad was fobbed off by a female GP for years before being diagnosed, and then it was too late to treat it.
So, really shit service for you today, but perhaps congratulate yourself on making a fuss - you are a menopause pioneer.
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CLKD have sent you a pm, hopefully you can find mention of him somewhere. To be honest I'm doubting he is even a gynae but rather someone they drag in to help out at a general gynae clinic.
Urbanchick, yes I think you are right and hopefully one day the profession will wake up and hopefully deal with menopausal problems in a much better way. Maybe our grandkids will reap the rewards for us all being Guinea pigs, God knows, but something has to be done to bring the medics out of the dark ages. I mean, if bl**dy soya oil was the cure we wouldn't all be suffering would we? a quick swig from the bottle and off we'd go , skipping like teenagers......😉
Tinkerbell, I explained today that my urogenital problems made me feel as though I was sat atop a porcupine that had been set on fire and at the same time someone was thrusting a jagged dagger up inside me. Psychological eh? What absolute boll***s!
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Oh yes, I almost forgot this little gem. He told me to stay on my regime for now and come off in the spring when it will make it easier. April is the best month apparently as nature is being renewed. I'd laugh if I wasn't so annoyed, hopefully by this evening I'll have a good chuckle over it all😄
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Money for old rope as my dear nan used to say😄.
Its not on at all and I fear for other women who may not have the confidence to question his methods and go against him. I'm quite looking forward to discussing this fool with my savvy gp......😉
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Hello linz57.
As you say, unbelievable! It would be funny if it wasn't so sad. Do please update us when you see your GP and hopefully something can be done about this idiot before he causes any more distress.
Take care.
K.
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I seem to get these nutters haha.
Yes I will update once the hospital letter makes its way to my gp and I can get an appointment.
I'm not an aggressive or argumentative person but I won't take stuff lying down if I feel it's not right. I shall fight my corner! :valkyrie:
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I did look ::) - no luck, no record of GMC Registration etc.. Maybe ring his Secretary ;) ……… to see if he exists. He could be a Locum or a visiting Consultant ………
Not a good appt. though. If it wasn't so serious then it would be laughable! But if every woman goes along and gets this response.
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Thank you for your help CLKD, I did ring the hospital earlier and was put through to the secretary of the main consultant whose team this doctor supposedly belonged to. She wasn't very forthcoming so
I strongly suspect he is a locum but I will try and find out.
I'd hate to think of him getting away with this unacceptable and patronising behaviour with other women, especially those who are emotionally vulnerable. Luckily I'm usually pretty strong in that department.😉
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If you get a result let us know!
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Will do!
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Oh dear. Been there done that, got the tshirt. Sadly these kinds of moronic "professionals" are all too common. I've experienced it twice.
The first was the very first GP I saw who unbeknownst to me was an advocate for compounded hormones and progesterone cream therapy. I tried his method and initially did really well, but when all my symptoms returned and I told him I thought I needed estrogen he literally abused me and told me I was a very angry person and all my problems were psychological and nothing would help me until I sorted out my "issues". As far as I was aware he was only a GP who had only met me once, and not a psychologist or psychiatrist, so he shouldn't have been diagnosing my mental health. Even a specialist wouldn't diagnose you that quickly.
The second time was when I made the mistake of seeing a naturopath, and when I still hadn't responded to her pills and potions after three months, it was my fault for being a "tough case".
The end result to these experiences was a severe dependency to diazepam which took me four years to get over.
Needless to say I will never have anything positive to say about anything other than conventional medical treatment for menopause.
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Linz57,
I have now words! I just can't believe what I have just read! I really hope you get sorted soon and someone finds out who this person is.
xXx
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Thank you for your helpful suggestions Rockhopper, I will take heed when I make my complaint.
Yes Dana, sadly even now in this day and age when menopause is more widely discussed and NICE guidelines have been updated, there are still medics who don't understand. Instead, they choose to fob us off with their quackery and insistence that we don't need estrogen. Fair enough, they are entitled to their views but they should not be allowed to interfere with their professional work. Ok, if we chose to go see a homeopath then we would expect alternative therapies but when we have appts to see consultants on the NHS we expect them to follow guidelines and not let their personal opinions overrule.
There probably are some ladies who find alternative medicine is enough to help them deal with their menopause but sadly, large numbers of us do need supplementing with estrogen and only that. No amount of oil will do.
Do you know, he actually asked me how I thought women went on years ago before hrt was available. I replied that ages ago women didn't live much past middle age anyway but in more recent times they must have suffered horribly. He had the audacity to say they didn't suffer and it was because they drank linseed oil!! I kid you not, he actually said that! *headbuts the desk*. I tell you what, he is proof that dinosaurs still exist in some parts.
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Unbelievable. I can't believe that a professional can be so dismissive of a clearly well informed patient who is after all the one suffering for the crime of being a woman! I was told by a dr friend that every GPS nightmare patient is a woman in menopause with a variety of symptoms. I believe I am not alone in suffering an endless list of revolving symptoms for which i have no magic cure. I am unable to take HRT, so I am taking everything and doing everything I possibly can to help myself. I live in a state of high anxiety most of the time and find my GP has little empathy for how debilitating this wretchedness is. However I've come to understand this is the norm. If I was to go to a gynaecology dept and be treated like this I would be furious and disgusted in equal measures.
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Early in my quest to determine what was wrong with me, a friend recommended I consult her midwife who prescribes compounded creams. As I was only 36 or 37 at the time, she not only refused to consider testing my hormones, but lectured me on the natural aging process and how unnatural it is that Suzanne Somers still has periods at her age from hormone use. She said that no woman that age should look like that. She seemed to think I was attempting to defy aging for vanity, wrinkles, who knows? Now that I'm on hrt and feeling better, I admit I'm regaining a little vanity, but during the 3 or 4 year decline, I could not have cared less about weight gain, wrinkles, hair growth/loss or whatever other signs of aging the medical community seemed to think I was fighting. I just wanted to feel functional. Some of these "professionals" are clueless. It's a shame.
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That's the problem isn't it Lizab, some of these professionals think we take hrt in a vain attempt at hanging onto our youth. How totally insulting and patronising of them, I'd like to see them handle the endless list of revolving symptoms that we endure. ( love the way you described that Lostit, it's perfect and describes my experiences so well).
Without hrt I suffer whole body aches, pains and burning, I feel off balance, I can't concentrate or form a coherent sentence some days, the pain from my my bladder and vagina are unbearable, my anxiety hits the roof and palpitations scare the hell out of me. So, for a jumped up, pompous and backward thinking male to patronise me by telling me it's all in my head and I should take oil to cure everything is beyond annoying.
I rang the hospital again today and spoke to the secretary of the gynae consultant whose team this buffoon is on. I asked if he was a regular and I nearly fell over when she said he is one of their top specialistsin gynae and obstetrics! God help the women of the county that's all I can say.
Anyway I told my story and the secretary is passing it on to the head honcho of gynae when she returns from holiday next week. I await her call!
I will also be putting it in writing Rockhopper.
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oh dear :(
I think women, before hrt, just quietly got on with it, gave up sex, knitted for their grandchildren until their spines started crumbling and they went into a home. Which is what my grandmother did.
Although she was always trying to get her thyroid meds sorted and having battles with ignorant GPs about that. Maybe she needed HRT ???
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Thank you sparkle, I will be happy to take this on, not just for me, but for those women who may feel too vulnerable to fight. Sorry it's not meant to sound cheesy ::)
Dahlia girl, I've heard about women getting through years of menopause on copious amounts of alcohol . It does sound rather tempting to me at the moment!
When I think back to when I was younger, women in their fifties and sixties did seem to look and act older than us now. I'm not surprised, what with few labour saving household devices, little money and raging meno symptoms. I think I'd have built a still in my garden!
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How very very scary linz57 - I am completely appalled! As I read through the thread I was thinking how disgusting it was to leave an important clinic in the hands of such a man and then when you said he was a top specialist - I am flabbergasted. Was he old (not that that should make any difference as Studd is well into his 70's!)? Definitely a dinosaur. If he was not listed though - how come he is one of their top guys? Good for you to complain anyway - I have never heard such appalling nonsense. Let us know the outcome anyway and hopefully you will be able to persuade your GP that whatever letter he sends ( re HRT) should be disregarded. I hope this won't cause trouble for you locally and make it more difficult to get what you want and need.
Hurdity x
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Fortunately I have a choice of two hospitals as I live on the border of two counties , so for further appts I will return to the larger hospital in the city.
I have been wondering whether I was given a stock answer re the guy being a top specialist, but then again I suppose he may be better in other areas of gynaecology . I'd say he was late fifties, early sixties Hurdity and I'm still wondering why his name isn't listed anywhere. Hmmm, something doesn't add up properly, I need to find out.
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When I went to my local chemist to collect my Oestrogel the chemist told me if I took flaxseed, ate more eggs and drank Himalayan pink salt I would sail through the menopause and if more women did these things there would be no need for HRT!!!
I was gobsmacked! :o
X
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The 'chemist' should be struck off. Was he offering any Clinical evidence to back up this statement? A letter to the Managing Director of this particular Chemist? I am sure that the Company would be appalled at such information being given out. Name and Shame!
For anyone's info., Himalyan pink salt is NO DIFFERENT from what they mine here in Cheshire. Salt is that: sodium chloride. It is un-ehtical to be importing salt from the Himalaya!!!! hardly green is it.
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I saw some tiny bags of that salt in an artisan type shop in Mallorca a few weeks ago. The price was about £8 a bag and I just wanted to shout out to the people buying it " IT'S JUST SALT FOR GOD'S SAKE!"
What an awful thing g for a chemist to say, just why do people like this think they can comment on a persons condition when they don't know all the details? Another self righteous preachy sort by the sounds of it. I'd be interested to hear what your reply was Otes73.
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I actually laughed!! I'm 42 and I'm guessing she was about my age. I asked her whether she was in her menopause, she said no and I wished her very good luck with her eggs and pink salt when she got there!!
In her defence I really do think she thought she was helping me?!
X
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Love it! I bet her face was a picture hahaha!
This has reminded me of a midwife who worked around here almost 30 years ago. She had never been pregnant and had no time for women suffering from morning sickness. Then she did eventually get pregnant and oh my god did everyone hear about how ill she felt. We all laughed. Cruel but .....
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That's hilarious Otes73. I mean what a cheek to comment on your prescription unprompted - that certainly is not her job!!! Eggs? Pink salt??!!!!
Good luck with your quest to find out the problem gynae linz57.
Hurdity x
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Imagine what I'll be told when I collect my testosterone prescription! ;D
X
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:rofl:
I can't wait for the next instalment!
Hurdity x :)
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*pulls up a chair, grabs a chocolate digestive and waits*
This should be good Oates ;D
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Great thread !
I'm hooked too
💚💚💚Ss x
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I had a lovely male GP once, he has just retired. He advised evening primrose oil, and I took it for years until he found out that the original research that suggested it stopped hot flushes had actually been faked! I once went to him with a bad back and he suggested yoga. I just waited three days and then said the yoga hasn't worked, give me the painkillers! We used to joke that for any wound he prescribed a lettuce leaf poultice!
It took a change to a female GP to get HRT, but I must admit his bedside manner was loads better. She always made me feel like I was a nuisance and a nutcase.
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Well I've been!
I had the giggles just handing it over, she probably thinks I'm nuts ;D
She told me to be very wary of bulking up......I'm 5ft 2 and 8 stone :o
She also said I would get a lots of hair growth and if I ate a lot more fat it would be helpful to increase my testosterone without having to supplement. I thanked her for her advice and said next time you see me you might not recognise me as I'll look like a man ;)
She laughed......not! X
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Would that be the Himalayan pink variety?
So the answer is more linseed, more eggs, more salt and more fat ??? That kicks all the dietary guidelines well into the long grass ;D
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Did you not know pink salt cured all?!?! ;)
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;D this thread goes from good to even better - really making me laugh out loud!
By the way Otes - I have not bulked up but now happily exercise without too much fatigue and muscle aches!!!! A bit more hairy though ( thighs - a fair amount, and abdomen - little bit here) - but who cares - this is easily removed?!
Hurdity x
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No daily beard to shave Hurdity?!
I'm glad it helps with the muscle aches, I go to the gym so will be nice to have a little boost. I'm not concerned with a little extra on my thighs, it's starting to get chilly anyway ;D
How do you measure your dose, I really didn't want to ask the pharmacist incase I put her in an early grave! X
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Also - there's Maldon salt ……… at least that's more 'green' than flying in the Pink variety ;D
Really, this person handing out medication should't be front of house >:(
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I used to have a GP who would often give me alternative suggestions (herbs etc) scribbled on a piece of paper rather than prescriptions. I guess there aren't any rules that they have to provide drugs.
Flaxseed (linseed) oil had a much stronger effect on me compared to hormones as it's well documented as one of the more effective phytoestrogens, I remember reporting on the forum about my bizarre overnight relief, but I unfortunately became allergic to it. Many drugs are based on herbs (and HRT is made from soy and yams) but herbs are often more potent and aren't regulated so anyone can prescribe them - including a well meaning MD!
I guess you need to request an HRT or menopause specialist as regular gynos may be out of touch and see our issues as outside of the NHS remit as meno doesn't constitute disease - which would explain his condescending attitude.
Endos may be more clued up if an expert isn't an option in your area and are, after all, hormone specialists.
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Flaxseed was impossible to crack, I did try …….. I bought Bergen bread instead but it didn't keep ….. probably a message there then.
Herbs aren't as well regulated as medicines in general. We had a 'witch' in our village, I used to creep by her bungalow ….. I suspect she used herbs but there was an air of mystery around the property :o. Crikey I was all of 4 or 5 years old ….
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I have successfully managed to grind it into a powder in the grinder attachment on the food processor.
I did it to put on my cereal (1tbsp) every morning as a cure for constipation. But it did nothing. I think it is probably better whole and soaked for this.
I didn't notice any hormonal effects, but wasn't looking for any at the time.
I think the hormonal effects have been looked at somewhere?
The trouble with herby stuff is the ingredient you want will be less concentrated, so you have to take in a lot of the other things that it comes with, and you may be sensitive to them. And you cannot be sure of the dose.
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Flaxseed and beards aside - getting back on track.... linz57 - do let us know how things progress with your complaint and your treatment!!!
Hurdity x :)
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Linz57
I've also thought of something else to highlight. Where was patient choice in this which is part of the collaborative process. You can also complain to PALS there's a PALS situated in all hospital (Patient Advice & Liaison Service).
Rockhopper xx
Good shout Rockhopper, I'd forgotten about PALS! Thank you
dangermouse, an endo might well be the way to go, but unfortunately there's around a 6 to 8 month waiting time around here. I think I'm going to go back to see my new GP, have a good talk about things and see if she will let me try swapping my Conti patch for a separate estrogen patch and Utrogestan or the Mirena. Also, I will add some oil into my daily routine and hopefully the combination will work.
Thanks to everyone for their helpful suggestions and good wishes.
Now, back to the talk of beards, flaxseed and sea salt.... I was enjoying it hahaha!
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Sea salt ?
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Can't you get crisps with sea salt these days? Maybe I should order a box and scoff a few bags every day. That, along with oiling my joints with the WD40 from the shed and I'll be like a spring chicken!😂😂
Yes, I do believe this could be the miracle cure for all
Our meno ills....I'll be rich!!
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Haha you'll be a new woman! ;D
Don't forget the eggs ;)
X
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Usually Maldon Sea Salt on crisps ;)